103. The Safety to be SEEN: Finding Your People When You're Finding Yourself

This week, we explore the tender space between solitude and connection, moving deeper into the theme of unapologetic self-expression (especially for those of us who learned to hide in self-protection.)For those of us who have long identified as "introverts," I ask you a very important question: are you ACTUALLY an introvert? Or do you just have social anxiety and are you scared to be seen? On today's episode, we explore the spectrum of introversion / extroversion as it relates to the safety to be seen and explore the truth behind these labels, social anxiety, and the self-preserving patterns that make us believe we're safer unseen and how to gently unravel them and find aligned community.We root into this theme of community and belonging - something so many of us strive to find in a chronically online, disconnected world - and how to find it when you're in the process of finding yourself. I take you through my own story of social anxiety, self-preservation, outgrowing friendships as a result of coming of age, coming into rediscovering platonic love in a new way, and explore how self-connection can expand into communion with others. If you take away one thing from this dialogue, let it be this:WHEN YOU LET YOURSELF BE SEEN, YOU LET YOURSELF BE LOVED! & YOU DESERVE TO BE BOTH SEEN + LOVED. (but how???? well, just sit back, relax, and listen <3) This episode is a part 2 to episode 102 (Unapologetic, Unconditional Beingness) (no need to listen in order!)xEPISODE RESOURCES:IF YOU <3 FSO, RATE THE PODCAST, LEAVE A COMMENT & SAY HI, AND STAY CONNECTED!COSTA RICA 2026!!! (Reach out over IG to chat if you are interested!)COMMUNITY / ROAD LESS TRAVELED INVITE: DM Me "Invite" On IG (@byvanessafontana) & let me know which one you're interested in!& SIGN UP FOR THE MAILING LIST TO BE NOTIFIED WHEN IT OFFICIALLY LAUNCHES:MAILING LIST (10% off Merch + a Free Energy Protection Meditation <3)IG: @byvanessafontanaTIKTOK: @butterflyfountain MERCHWRITE TO ME FOR A CHANCE TO BE FEATURED ON AN UPCOMING EPISODE My Substack <3xGET 40% OFF OF YOUR CALM SUBSCRIPTION HERE: calm.com/vanessaSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

Many of us have come to know our true selves and what alignment feels like to *some* extend, but how do you ~stay~ aligned, even when life isn't? Even when your environment.. isn't?This episode is all about staying rooted in love, alignment, and authenticity - no matter what’s happening around you. We explore the continuum of contrast, the wound of rejection, and the habit of people-pleasing that pulls us out of ourselves and keep us small - especially when faced with people who project, misunderstand, or drain our energy..Because here’s the truth: the world does not have to comply for you to feel good. You do not have to change anyone or anything to be at peace. Alignment is because of *you*, not your circumstances.In this episode, you'll learn how to take radical responsibility for your alignment, understand your conditioning, and release control-oriented patterns that keep you small.We talk inner child healing, shadow work, and the truth about introversion (& social anxiety) as self-preservation - and how to bring your full, radiant self into every room. (BECAUSE THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF YOU BEING YOU <3)xIF YOU <3 FSO, RATE THE PODCAST, LEAVE A COMMENT & SAY HI, AND STAY CONNECTED!JOIN ME IN COSTA RICA 2026!!!IG: @byvanessafontanaTIKTOK: @butterflyfountainMERCH MAILING LIST (10% off Merch + a Free Energy Protection Meditation <3)WRITE TO ME FOR A CHANCE TO BE FEATURED ON AN UPCOMING EPISODE FSO Episodes Referenced:Episode 43: Speak your Truth & Protect Your Peace: The Energy of Alignment & InfluenceShadow-Work Series, Part 1CHAPTERS:0:00-4:00: how to stay aligned, relentlessly love, + be YOU5:30: the continuum of contrast & choosing love over fear 7:00: addressing the wound of rejection + the habit of people pleasing / molding ourselves / control-oriented behaviors8:00: step 1: radical responsibility9:30: becoming aware of your conditioning 11:00: when you ask for more, you will be met with opportunities to choose MORE. relationships & opportunities are our mirrors 14:00: inner child healing, shadow-work, the WHY behind when we start hiding 18:00: when empathy & emotional attunement becomes maladaptive22:00: introversion as a self-preservation tactic / why you're actually drained by socializing30:00: you are here for a reason. you’ve done half the work - how do you take the work / alignment with you? 27:00: alignment is because of YOU, not your circumstance. why we feel a fresh perspective when we travel / go somewhere but have trouble integrating. the love you see in anything is a reflection of you34:00: you don't have to cut people off to protect your peace 37:00: if you love someone take them off the pedastal of expectation: it's not fair to them, it's not fair to you.36:00: the shift that changes everything.40:00: believe so radically 44:00: unconditional love  Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

On this episode, we’re breaking down the real mechanics of manifestation and demystifying the heavily marketed *woo-woo* behind it.(....Coming from a girl who loves and firmly embraces the woo-woo.)Spirituality and science are finally beginning to speak the same language, and on this episode, we’re translating both. This is a deep-dive into the inner physics of creation: how emotion shapes matter, how the heart bends time, and how the future already lives inside of you.We dive into the fundamental power within all of us to access emotional alchemy - dissipating past pain and creating a more expansive future and we do this by covering it alllll - the neuroscience, the energetics, and the emotional regulation behind true transformation.Pens & Papers out today folks because Class! Is! In! Session!xLove FSO? Let me know your thoughts on this episode with a comment! Let me know what you want to hear next! Rate the podcast 5 stars on your preferred streaming platform! & STAY CONNECTED xIG: @byvanessafontanaTIKTOK: @butterflyfountainMERCH MAILING LIST (10% off Merch + a Free Energy Protection Meditation <3)WRITE TO ME FOR A CHANCE TO BE FEATURED ON AN UPCOMING EPISODE COSTA RICA 2026FSO Episodes Referenced:Part 1: Law of Attraction, Living in Alignment, Surrendering & Trusting your intuition Part 2: Law of Attraction, Romanticizing your Life, Self-Fulfilling Prophecies, and Gratitude into LuckinessMARATHON EPISODE Shadow-Work Episodes: Inner Child HealingSelf-Expression & Creativity Further RESOURCES Mentioned: HeartMath InstituteFree Heart Coherence Meditation About VipassanaInsight timer - Free Meditation App DavidJi 40 Days of Transformation (Paid Version) CHAPTERS:0:00-3:00: Time is Non-Linear3:00-7:00: Manifestation is not what you think it is: skepticism & discernment is necessary7:00-12:00: CLASS IN SESSION! The Mechanics of Energy & The Basic States of Creation12:00-15:00: Concepts of Time15:00-18:00: Felt Sensation 18:00-22:00: Energetic Pathway of the Heart, Heart Math, Heart Coherence22:00-30:00: How I accidentally quantum Leaped30:00-35:00: The Most Important Emotion 35:00-37:00: What this REALLY all means. Simplifying it all. 37:00-49:00: Practices for Collapsing TimeSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

Season 4 opens with an invitation: to break subconscious contracts, to honor the duality of being and becoming, and to claim the inevitability of who you already are, embracing the fullness of your dreams with bravery and commitment. This episode walks you through the arc of survival, fear, and limitation - into freedom, expression, and truth. It maps the narrative arc of survival into self-expression, exploring the psychology of subconscious contracts and the practice of choosing your own inevitability over fear. xJOIN THE MAILING LIST FOR 10% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER OF MERCH + A FREE GROUNDING & ENERGY PROTECTION MEDITATION: (BOTTOM OF THE PAGE) EXPLORE MERCH: Here! COSTA RICA MARCH 2026 RETREAT: 2 EARLY BIRD SPOTS LEFT IG: @byvanessafontanaTIKTOK: @butterflyfountainYoutube Video: Watch HereAdvertising Inquiries: [email protected]: 0:00 - Figuring Sh!t Out - SEASON 4 2:00: the narrative arc - when the road less traveled becomes.. the road you're on 9:00: you are inevitable14:00 the profound responsibility of taking responsibility for your own life 18:00: your subconscious contracts + failure pre-emption20:00: ways that I break my own subconscious contracts22:00: the myth of working "hard": let it be easy 23:00: the loyalty we pay to our fear vs our dreams & the contract of unworthiness25:00: PRACTICAL TIPS TO TURN survival into self-expression 30:00 the responsibility of being inevitableSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

gentle reminders for when you're overthinking, overwhelmed, and over-doing it.the art of let oneself be (without guilt) is a love letter to the magic that appears when you let go and it is done with the intention of:taking the BEING very seriously and the DOING very unseriously. this is the last episode of season three and the last page of the road less traveled chapter. so much more to come. see you very soon for episode 100. xWATCH THE VIDEO EPISODE HEREFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSFSO InstagramPersonal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainIF YOU LOVE FSO, RATE THE PODCAST ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM, LEAVE A COMMENT, SHARE THIS EPISODE &STAY CONNECTED:Artist's Way Community Sign-Upfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected]:0:00-5:00: the art of intentional living and the radical act of beingness5:00-7:18: the inevitable highs and lows, inhales and exhales, and sitting in between7:18-12:30: potential portals to beingness12:30-14:00: this is your sign to live more fully, freely, and joyfully14:00-18:00: embodying See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

every day is dress rehearsal for the life you want to live and the person you want to be.if you're trying, you're trying too hard.let this episode remind you of the truth of who you are - stop trying. start being.let go of the story & start LIVING your truth.and start now.xWATCH THE VIDEO EPISODE HEREFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSFSO IGPersonal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainIF YOU LOVE FSO, RATE THE PODCAST ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM, LEAVE A COMMENT, SHARE THIS EPISODE &STAY CONNECTED:Artist's Way Community Sign-Upfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected]: 0:00-4:00: You're Not Special, but You Are Powerful 4:00-8:00: Coming Clean 8:00-10:00: your worth starts right now10:00-12:00: What you want reveals who You Are 12:00-14:00: what is driving you? Fear or love?14:00-16:00: what if I don't believe it?16:00-18:00: the distinct polarities18:00-20:00: don't stare at fear. don't linger. 20:00-21:00: the trap of "trying" and how it keeps us stuck without realizing it21:00-23:00: life is a process of creation, not discovery.23:00: let go of the story & start LIVING your truthSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

"What aspects of myself do I wish to experience now in the face of this calamity? What aspects of being do I choose to call forth? For all life exists as a tool of your own creation, and all of its events merely present themselves as opposites for you to decide to be who ou are. There are no victims. Only creators" - Neil Walsch, Conversations with GodThought-Daughtering my way through every major challenge and transition in my life and remembering:Everything is an opportunity to deepen your most high truth - especially, your biggest challenges. Layers within them, are blessings.CHAPTERS:0:00-7:00: life update & backstory: where am I... living?7:00-19:00: challenges & hardship are opportunities to go deeper into who we really are19:00-25:00: we are pure creative potential25:00-29:00: you are not a victim!!!29:00-31:00: the misconception of the higher self31:00-35:00: how lucky are we to have a last time?x:WATCH THE VIDEO EPISODE HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OKOGbozAagFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSFSO IGPersonal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainIF YOU LOVE FSO, RATE THE PODCAST ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM, LEAVE A COMMENT, SHARE THIS EPISODE &STAY CONNECTED:Artist's Way Community Sign-Upfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

life is happening FOR you, not to you. your access to freedom is right here and now - in the chance and opportunity to trust when your faith is shaken.on this week's episode, i give you background into how this mindset is keeping me steady and strong after finding out i may have to leave my home of three years on a week's notice (stay tuned to find out what happens next week! figuring sh!t out in real time! haha! it's so not funny! but i have to laugh! because what else! is there! to do!! haha!!) xWATCH THE VIDEO EPISODE HERE: https://youtu.be/Lifni4OshfwFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSPersonal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainIF YOU LOVE FSO, RATE THE PODCAST ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM, LEAVE A COMMENT, SHARE THIS EPISODE &STAY CONNECTED:FSO IGArtist's Way Community Sign-Upfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected]: 0:00-4:30: If You're Forcing: Stop. 4:30- 13:00: Backstory of Being (potentially) Displaced in NYC: 13:00: Resisting vs Surrendering, The RatRace & Hamster Wheel15:00: There is nothing that could take you from your path. it will emerge 19:00: tests of trust come through uncertainty 23:00: the process is the pointSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

This episode is an ode to reclaiming your creativity and individuality after being flooded and energetically dulled from phone addiction, a noisy world of aesthetics and trends, and overstimulation.In it, I give you a six-step ritual to reclaim spaciousness inside of your own head, to hear your own voice, and to unravel the subtle signal of yourself beneath all of the noise.In a world that demands so much of our attention, where every desire is boxed into a trend or an aesthetic to curate onto a Pinterest board, where we are drowned by stimuli the moment we step into the deep-end of unlocking our phones - individuality and autonomy is no longer a birthright, but a skill. And in a culture of immediacy and urgency, choosing to listen, have patience, and prioritize play is a radical act.This is not performance.This is learning how to breathe again.xWATCH THE VIDEO TO THIS EPISODE HERE! I LOVE YOU!!IF YOU <3 FSO, RATE THE PODCAST ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM, LEAVE A COMMENT, SHARE THIS EPISODE &STAY CONNECTED:FSO IGJOIN THE Community! To Support the Show! For Bonus Meditations, Episodes, & Discounted/Free Access to Workshops.Free Grounding & Energy Cleansing Meditation in the FSO Together community <3Personal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainxMentioned in the episode:Artist's Way Community Sign-UpFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSTikTok I referenced on Dopamine RecoveryRead the piece I wrote for this episode <3Xfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected]:0:00-2:00: Coming Home to Yourself. Even "Good Noise" Is still Noise2:00-10:00: What Inspired this Episode: My Experience with Energetic Density10:00-13:00: Energetic Hygiene: All it Takes13:00-14:00 The Art of Hearing Your Own Voice14:00-17:00: The Unraveling, Creativity Cave, Sensory Reclamation, Boredom As A Portal17:00-19:00: We Have to remember this was always Ours19:00-21:00: How Trends, Labels, and Aesthetics Keep us in a Box21:00-27:00: The Artist's Way is the Spiritual Path27:00-34:00: Dopamine & Scrolling34:00-39:00: Oh My Darling, It was Never That Serious.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations

What if your expression: your voice, your vision, your rebellion was the most direct line to the divine? What if Art was your prayer?In this conversation with my dear friend Etai, we explore the thin veil between art and spirituality and the daily devotion of creativity and leading life with an open heart.We discuss in depth - The Artist's Way, fear, rejection, finding the right audience, living with an open heart, and returning to wholeness through expression.Etai has built an online community of over 400,000 who use his yoga videos to get closer to themselves and their truths. He's built this platform in the last year through a brave spirit of pure authenticity as he finds himself calling other parts of the globe his home and sharing his truth. May his words, voice, and presence inspire your path forward and let you live in your calling. x Etai's IGEtai's LinksEtai's first FSO episodexFSO COSTA RICA RETREAT 2026: LIMITED 10% OFF EARLY-BIRD SPOTSxSTAY CONNECTED:FSO IGJOIN THE Community! To Support the Show! For Bonus Meditations, Episodes, & Discounted/Free Access to Workshops.Free Grounding & Energy Cleansing Meditation in the FSO Together community <3Personal Instagram: @vanessaafontanaTikTok: butterflyfountainxfor partnerships or inquiries, please contact:[email protected]: 00:00-07:40: Discovering Oneself07:40-10:20: One Year of Solo Travel & Spiritual Unfolding Showing Up Online 10:20-14:00: The Sacred Contrast: Collectivism vs. Free Expression14:00-17:00: Showing Up Online, Yoga as a Muse, Building a Digital Devotional17:00-20:00: Living with an Open Heart & True Authentic Freedom20:00-25:00: The Artists Way + Inseparability between Art & Spirituality25:30-35:00: The Company We Keep35:00-40:55 – Yoga as Muse & Art as OfferingSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/figuring-sht-out/donations