The ‘selfish’ woman's guide to divorce

If you've ever felt guilty for putting yourself first, this episode is for you.Kate is joined by Valerie Jones, author, coach and founder of The Selfish Woman movement, to explore what it really means to be a 'selfish woman' in divorce - and why reclaiming that word could be one of the most important things you do for yourself.We talk about:What being a 'selfish woman' really means – and why reclaiming it mattersHow to rebuild self-trust when divorce has knocked your confidenceThe moment Valerie knew it was time to leave her marriageThe difference between healthy guilt and the kind that holds you backWhy taking a moment to pause is one of the most powerful things you can doPractical ways to start showing up for yourself againThis episode is for any woman who has ever put herself last – whether she’s in the middle of separation, still deciding or rebuilding life on the other side.Meet Valerie JonesValerie Jones is the author of The Selfish Year, host of The Selfish Woman podcast, and founder of The Selfish Woman movement. Her work helps women let go of ‘good girl’ conditioning and people-pleasing, stop seeking external approval and build unapologetic self-trust. Valerie meets women exactly where they are and helps them show up for themselves, fully. You can learn more about Valerie on her website and buy her book The Selfish Year on Amazon. Complete Valerie's quiz to find out the hidden ways you might be sabotaging yourself. More divorce resourcesReady to take a practical next step?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation.Want ongoing support as you rebuild after separation?Kate’s book amicable divorce includes dedicated chapters on navigating the emotional journey of separation, as well as practical advice to help you through every step of the process. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#EmotionalJourney

You know your marriage is over. But you're still waiting – for the right moment, more certainty, or permission you're not sure will ever come. This episode is for anyone who's been circling the same question and is ready to stop waiting and start moving forward.Kate is joined by Farhana Hussain, the UK's first divorce doula and author of She's Not Done Yet, to explore what keeps people stuck in the space between knowing their marriage is over and actually applying for divorce – and how moving forward is about choosing to become the author of your own life.We talk about:Farhana’s own separation story and what led her to write She’s Not Done YetWhy people wait – even when they know what they wantWhy even amicable divorces can lead to being stuckThe emotional and practical cost of delayDecision fatigue and why divorce is never just one decisionHow to stop waiting for permission and start authoring your own lifeThis episode is for anyone who feels like their life is on hold - and is ready to stop waiting and start moving forward.Meet the Divorce DoulaFarhana Hussain is the UK’s first Divorce Doula, founder of the award-winning business My Divorce Doula™, and author of She’s Not Done Yet: A Divorce Doula’s Manifesto for Women Who Refuse to Stay Stuck. Farhana helps people move from circling the same question to making a clear decision they can stand behind, so they enter the divorce process grounded, prepared and able to engage constructively.You can get in touch with Farhana through her website and you can buy her book on Amazon today.More divorce resourcesReady to take a practical next step? Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation. Want ongoing support through separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars, articles and an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Kate’s book amicable divorce includes dedicated chapters on navigating the early stages of separation, including deciding whether your relationship is over and having the separation conversation in a way that reduces shock and defensiveness. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#EmotionalJourney

If you’re navigating life in a stepfamily and finding the dynamics more complex than you expected, this episode offers practical guidance to help you build stronger, healthier relationships.In this episode, Kate is joined by April Eldemire, a licensed marriage and family therapist and former stepmum, and Bec Jones, Head of Negotiation at amicable, to explore the realities of blended and stepfamily life. Together, they unpack some of the most common challenges blended families face and share thoughtful advice on how to create a more connected and supportive family environment.We talk about:How the 'evil stepmother' stereotype still affects stepmums todayCommon challenges when creating blended familiesSetting boundaries and approaching discipline in stepfamiliesHow the couple’s relationship can shape stepfamily stabilityBuilding strong relationships with stepchildren over timeThis episode is for parents and step-parents building blended families, who want to approach stepfamily life with more understanding, patience and confidence.Meet April and BecApril Eldemire is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, former stepmum, and the creator of The Blended Family Alignment Blueprint, a framework that helps couples end power struggles and parent as a united team. While April’s own blended family didn’t last, her journey fuels her passion for helping others avoid the same mistakes she made. With over 13 years of experience specialising in stepfamily dynamics, she’s on a mission to help families replace conflict with teamwork and build homes where love can finally lead.Having had over 10 years of experience as a divorce lawyer, Bec Jones leads amicable's Negotiation team. She played a vital role in developing the amicable process and is renowned for her empathetic approach. With expertise in child arrangements, blended families and complex finances, she is a fountain of knowledge.More divorce resourcesFeeling ready to take practical steps forward? Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation. Or explore our Separating with Children Service – a 90-minute joint session with a Co-parenting Specialist tailored to your family’s needs.Want ongoing support through separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars, articles and an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#Coparenting

If you’re separating with adult children and finding it more emotionally complicated than you expected, this episode offers calm, reassuring guidance to help you navigate it with care.In this episode, Kate shares thoughtful, practical tips for separating when your children are grown. She explores why adult children are still deeply affected by family change and how the way you handle separation now can shape your family relationships for years to come.In this episode, Kate covers:How to talk to your adult children about separation in a calm, respectful wayWhat practical conversations to have early with your ex-partner – from holidays and celebrations to future grandchildrenHow kindness, clear boundaries and thoughtful planning now can support a healthier extended family long termThis episode is for parents going through separation with adult children who want to handle it with empathy, steadiness and care, while protecting the relationships that matter most.More divorce resourcesFeeling ready to take practical steps forward? Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation. Or explore our Separating with Children Service – a 90-minute joint session with a Co-parenting Specialist tailored to your family’s needs.Want ongoing support through separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars, articles and an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Kate’s book amicable divorce includes dedicated chapters on co-parenting, with practical guidance on supporting your children's wellbeing, talking to them in age-appropriate ways and building a cooperative co-parenting relationship that reduces conflict. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#Coparenting

If you’re trying to feel better after separation and make sense of what healing really looks like, this episode offers honest reassurance and practical guidance for moving forward with self-compassion.Kate is joined by Corey Seemiller, award-winning leadership professor and author of The Soulmate Strategy, to explore what helped her recover after a split and why continuing to try new approaches was an important part of her healing.In this episode, we cover:Corey’s personal separation story and early steps toward healingWhat worked and what didn’t from the 44 different things she tried to feel betterHow writing a deeply personal book shaped her career and academic researchPractical, realistic advice for moving forward after separation and building healthier relationshipsThis episode is for anyone navigating life after a breakup who wants reassurance that healing isn’t linear and that growth often comes from curiosity and kindness towards yourself.Trigger warning: this episode includes discussion of physical injury, so please listen with care.Meet Corey SeemillerCorey Seemiller is an award-winning leadership professor, author and accredited life coach. After her own separation, she experimented with 44 different approaches to healing – a journey that became the foundation for her book The Soulmate Strategy and shaped her academic research on relationships and personal growth. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, Time Magazine and Newsweek, and her highly popular TED Talk. She co-hosts the Rock That Relationship! podcast, discussing disasters and successes with breakups, healing processes, dating and relationships.You can learn more about Corey’s new book The Soulmate Strategy here. For more relationship advice, you can tune in to the Rock That Relationship! podcastMore divorce resourcesNeed expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation.Want ongoing support as you rebuild after separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars and articles on emotional wellbeing and life after divorce - plus an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Kate’s book amicable divorce includes a dedicated chapter about healing post-separation and moving on. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#LifeAfterDivorce

If you’re facing a house move during or after separation and feeling overwhelmed by the logistics, emotions or sheer volume of decisions, this episode offers calm, practical guidance to help you feel more in control.Kate is joined by moving experts Nicholas Illingworth and James Mehmet from Abels Moving Services to share practical guidance that will help you feel more prepared for the move in just a few minutes.In this episode, we cover:The key differences between a standard house move and moving after separationWhy detailed planning is especially important when emotions are running highPractical packing tips to reduce stress and last-minute panicStrategies to make the move smoother for you and your familyCommon logistics mistakes to avoid when moving out post-divorceThis episode is for anyone moving house during or after a separation who wants clear, expert-led advice to make the process more organised and a little less daunting.About AbelsNicholas Illingworth (Partnership Manager) and James Mehmet (Branch Manager and Head of Special Projects) are moving experts at Abels Moving Services.Since 1958, Abels Moving Services has specialised in high-quality International shipping, home removals and storage - including sensitive moves during separation, where emotional and practical considerations require extra care. Their in-house moving teams are experts in moving antiques and specialist items such as pianos, grandfather clocks and fine art alongside day-to-day household items and furniture.More divorce resourcesNeed expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation.Want ongoing support through separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars, articles and an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Kate’s book amicable divorce includes practical advice for navigating all aspects of separation — from early decisions to financial planning and rebuilding after divorce. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#Finances

If money conversations in relationships feel uncomfortable, overwhelming or you avoid them altogether, this episode offers practical guidance on financial transparency and being open and honest about money.Kate is joined by Tom Francis, Head of Personal Finance at Octopus Money, to explore why money conversations feel so difficult in relationships – and how financial transparency during separation can help you feel more confident and reduce conflict.In this episode, we cover:What financial transparency looks like in relationships and during separationHow to start understanding your own finances and build confidenceWhy money conversations feel so difficultPractical ways to approach financial discussions constructivelyHow financial openness supports a smoother, fairer separationThis episode is for anyone navigating separation or divorce who wants to feel more informed and to make clearer financial decisions with confidence.Meet Tom FrancisTom is Head of Personal Finance at Octopus Money, a money advice brand for everyone. Tom spends his time designing the customer journey to deliver regulated financial advice to the many, using the best of technology and humanity. He’s a fully qualified and chartered financial planner, and before joining Octopus Money, he played a leading role in building and scaling robo-advisers in the UK, including Wealthsimple (which was later sold to Moneyfarm) and Nutmeg.You can learn more about Octopus Money on their website, and you can also book a free consultation with a money expert here. You can hear more financial advice from Tom on Keep the Change podcast, and make sure to follow him on Instagram for more bite-sized money tips. More divorce resourcesNeed expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation.Want ongoing support through your separation journey?Kate’s book amicable divorce is out in March, including dedicated chapters with practical guidance on dealing with money during and after separation. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#Finances

If you came out of a relationship feeling ashamed, stuck in self-blame or questioning your self-worth, this episode offers compassionate guidance to help you heal and rebuild confidence.Kate is joined by Sarah Wilson, founder of Coastal Coaching and host of The Inner SUCCESS Story podcast, to explore how toxic relationship patterns form, why shame often follows separation and how low self-esteem can make breakups feel even more painful - especially if you were the one who chose to leave.In this episode, we cover:Sarah’s personal experience of staying in an unhealthy relationshipHow shame can show up after a breakup The link between childhood experiences and adult relationship patternsWhy low self-esteem can worsen the emotional impact of separationActionable steps to build self-love and self-compassion post-divorceThis episode is for anyone navigating the emotional aftermath of a difficult breakup who wants to understand themselves with more compassion and begin rebuilding confidence from a steadier place.Trigger warning: this episode covers content that some listeners might find distressing, including toxic relationships, emotional abuse and shame.Meet Sarah WilsonSarah is the founder of Coastal Coaching (Sussex) Limited, a keynote speaker and the host of The Inner SUCCESS Story podcast.Her early family relationships shaped a deep sense of not being good enough, a pattern that followed her into adulthood and her marriage. After leaving an emotionally abusive relationship, and inspired by her young son, she committed to deep personal change.In 2020, Sarah founded Coastal Coaching to support professionals stepping into leadership and help them build confidence from the inside out. Her work is grounded in accredited coaching practice, lived experience and a belief that people have more choice than they realise. You can learn more about Sarah on her website or you can get in touch with her on LinkedIn. For more tips on how to break free from self-sabotaging habits, you can tune in to her podcast The Inner S.U.C.C.E.S.S. Story.More divorce resourcesNeed expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation.Want ongoing support as you rebuild after separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive webinars, articles and an interactive community where you can share questions and get expert advice from amicable specialists. Start your free trial here.Kate’s book amicable divorce is out in March, including practical guidance on emotional recovery, self-compassion and moving forward after separation. Find it on Amazon today.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#EmotionalJourney

If you’re finding conflict hard to manage during separation and co-parenting, this episode is full of practical tips to help you disagree in a calmer, more constructive way.Kate is joined by psychotherapist and divorce coach Eve Stanway to explore why arguments aren’t always a bad thing – and how learning to disagree well can transform your relationship with your ex-partner and your children.In this episode, we cover:Eve’s separation story and how arguments shaped it Why arguments don’t have to be destructiveHow to break cycles of unproductive conflictThe key skills that stop disagreements from escalatingWhy self-regulation matters during separation and co-parentingHow to have productive arguments with your childrenThis episode is for anyone navigating separation or co-parenting who wants to reduce conflict and communicate more effectively.Meet Eve StanwayEve Stanway is a psychotherapist with 25 years of experience, break-up and divorce coach and published author who specialises in guiding parents, individuals and professionals through separation, co-parenting and recovery from toxic relationships. You can learn more about Eve and get in touch with her on her website, and for more helpful communication tips, you can tune in to her brand-new podcast, Dare To Speak: Difficult Conversations That Change Everything. More divorce resourcesNeed expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial, emotional or co-parenting aspects of separation. Or explore our Separating with Children Service – a 90-minute joint session with a Co-parenting Specialist tailored to your family’s needs.Want ongoing support through separation?Kate’s book amicable divorce is out in March, including dedicated chapters on reducing conflict, communication and co-parenting. Find it on Amazon today.Want to stay organised as co-parents?As a thank you for listening, here’s 3 months of the amicable co-parenting app for free! Open this link on your phone, install the app and create your account. Once that’s done, select 'I have a promo code' when setting up your family, enter PODCAST, press ‘apply’ and enjoy staying organised together.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#EmotionalJourney

If you’re separating or divorcing and want to avoid unnecessary conflict, this episode offers an exclusive preview of Kate's book amicable divorce – with practical guidance straight from the author to help you approach separation in a calmer, more child-focused way.In this special mini episode, Kate takes you through the key chapters of amicable divorce, sharing the insights, stories and expert guidance that shaped the book – from changing the negative story we tell about divorce to helping parents see separation through their children’s eyes.Kate covers:How slowing down at the start can prevent long-term conflictWhy emotional readiness matters as much as legal stepsWhat ‘amicable’ really means – and what it doesn’tHow to make child-focused decisions about parenting and moneyWhy understanding finances reduces fear and argumentsHow to move from ‘us’ to ‘me’ with care and self-compassionThis episode is for anyone considering or going through separation who wants practical, child-focused guidance to approach divorce with less blame and more clarity.About amicable divorceamicable divorce is Kate's practical guide to navigating separation with less conflict and more compassion. Drawing from her experience supporting thousands of couples, it includes real stories, expert insights and child-focused guidance for every stage of the process.Out in March 2026 – order on Amazon today.More divorce resources:Want ongoing support through separation?Join amicable space for bonus podcast episodes, exclusive content and webinars on navigating separation – plus a supportive community where you can share questions and get expert advice. Start your free trial here.Need expert help right now?Book a free 15-minute consultation with an amicable expert for guidance on the legal, financial or co-parenting aspects of separation.Thanks for listening - here’s 3 months of the amicable co-parenting app for free! Open this link on your phone, install the app and create your account. Once that’s done, select 'I have a promo code' when setting up your family, enter PODCAST, press ‘apply’ and enjoy staying organised together.Got a question for a future episode?Share your thoughts at [email protected] or through direct messages on Instagram.#EmotionalJourney