ODR 013 - Should, Must, & Won't

This Article is a Must Read if you Found this Episode on Free Will InterestingThe Lucretian SwerveAttributionsWhile 1% of this episode may be independent thinking, the rest was surely based on influences too countless to cite. Some that clearly remain foremost as inspiration are the article above, Dan Dennett’s work, Sam Harris’ book, the book, Four Views on Free Will, and all by poor undergrad professors that had to put up with the utter annoyance of my stubbornness.One of the Most Critical Articles to Read on the TopicChun SS et al. Unconscious determinants of free decisions in the human brain. Nat Neurosci. 2008 May;11(5):543-5. PMID: 18408715Image by NarcournusNow on to the ‘cast 

More on Last EpisodeEmail Part 1 – Email is Not the Problem, You Are!The JoyboxDeep WorkNo Email You Don’t Want to SeeTurn off email notifications!  ReceivingTouch Once (listen to prior episode)Filter RelentlesslyOne Email Address but many! Add the dots! Then you can filter based on thisAmazon filters to Deliveries AppFilter all messages with the word “unsubscribe” into a separate mailboxDo not mark emails as spam UNLESS THEY ARE SPAMMark Spam Messages as SpamYour Piss Poor Planning is not my EmergencyDo not let your email inbox be someone else’s To Do List — Tiago Forte ProcessingStop Filing/FolderingCan Actually Link Emails to Your Task ManagerTask Management on Calendar will have the linkBetter Yet, Create a Email Forward to Your Task Manager InboxFuture Homer/IkigaiAvoid the Snooze ButtonTriage 2 App on IOSSendingIs this the right mode of communicationCraft a good, useful subject lineBLUF-allows contexual understandingCTA upfront if you are making a pitch,Lose the Steps of Back & ForthUse Autofill and TemplatesSend Later (Boomerang)Emojis / Emoticons b/c tone is tough to relayCompose Better EmailsUse Scheduling ProgramsSend Less emails if you want less emailsOne idea per emailShort is BetterBLUF or TLDRWrite email like you speakNo Reply NecessaryIf it is important, do not put in the sender until ready to sendEnable undo send in gmailDo not CC unless you need toDon’t Reply All and Take it Off DefaultIf you don’t want the staff to respond to all, put them in as BCCPrune Forwards and RepliesWhen the Subject Changes–Change the...

This episode is based on one of the most important books I have ever read: NonViolent Communication – A Language of Life by Marshall RosenbergNonviolent Communication is one of the most powerful ways of speaking with people that I have ever come across. It eliminates useless strategies like judgment and proving yourself right and instead gives you absolutely tactical techniques to get the things you need for happiness for yourself and your interlocutor.NVC is not a new, gimmicky set of dictum. It boils down the philosophies of Stoicism, the psychological approaches of CBT and cognitive psychology.Marshall Rosenberg was a psychologist trained in the classical analytic, but found it unsatisfying and for the most part, unhelpful.Speaking Giraffe vs. Speaking JackalNVC is not really a theory or a guide to behavior–it is a language!!!Giraffes only hear feelings & needs, never thoughtsJackal language is about judging, criticizing, analyzing, moralizing and accusing. When we feel unfairly treated, accused or when we want to impose our wishes, we tend to use the language of the jackal. Jackal language is separating. Giraffe language is unifying. The SystemThere are essentially two major parts–The four component speech creation and emergency empathyThe Four Components1. Observation without EvaluationThere’s nothing good or bad but thinking makes it so.Shakespeare in HamletAvoid generalization, only specifics (generally good to avoid the past as well)Separate the observation from the evaluation or better yet, eliminate the evaluationYou are the most inconsiderate person–you are always lateJ Krishnamurti: “observing without evaluating is the highest form of human intelligence”See page 30 for more on pitfalls in observing2. FeelingInternal emotional states vs. thoughts/judgmentIf you can replace I feel with I think–then it is not a feelingIf I feel is followed by: that, like, or as if then it is not a feelingIf I feel is followed by a name or pronoun (whether he, you, or I), then it is not a feelingEliminate the feel–and see if it still works I feel sad to I’m sad works. I feelCould you feel it alone on a desert island–Ignored is not a feeling, unimportant is not a feeling, resentment is not a feeling b/c they require another to judge/act. It is a thought about how someone else is judging usp.45 has a list of positive and negative feelingsStoicism/CBT–We are the only ones responsible for our feelingsWe are responsible for everything we do (Replace I have to with I choose to)Do not connect the feelings to the observations through cause and effect. They relate–they are not caused by.When I observe X, I feel YEven break it down to good/badPeople are disturbed not by things, but by the view they take of them –Epictetus“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so” from “Hamlet” by William Shakespeare3. NeedsRosenberg identifies human needs as safety, understanding, respect, warmth,autonomy, etc. When needs are expressed indirectly through assessmentsand...

The ODR PodcastOn Deeper Reflection is a podcast on making our lives as happy and productive as possible! Today’s episode deals with the bugbear of many in medicine–email.Part II is now Up as Well1. Understand the TechnologyEmail is an amazing Technology!Async-MailSync-Phone, Telegraph, Text, Chatapps,Email-Asynchronous with instant delivery–but this should not mean instant viewingPhilosophy is wrong, not tacticsBad SolutionsAn article on just keeping emails in inbox misses the entire point. There are only two acceptable solutions and ignoring email is definitely one of them, but inbox zero is the better version of that.Inbox ZeroArrival Rate vs. Departure RateEvery inbox item costs you decision dollarsWe don’t want to make decisionsToo Much Email-No!!!!! Too Much StuffI Just Check Once Per DayVs. I set aside time to do Deep WorkAnalogous to I took Facebook off my phone…2. Email Should Spark JoyUsed to have combined work and homeNever, ever do this!!!! Separate Work and EmailWork Check Once, while at work or every day depending on your jobHorrible human being would email on Friday afternoon with something horrible3. Don’t treat an async tech as syncDon’t expect or encourage real-time useIt is fine to reply right away, but dissuade the belief that you will consistentlyPacing4. Your Email Inbox cannot be your ToDo system5. Just 1 TouchDoItSystemItDelegateItSaveItUnsubIt-goes back to brings joy, true joy–not dopamine hitFilterItTrashit (actually archive)SpamItMaybe-Bringit Back Services6. Archive, Don’t Delete7. Search, Don’t File8. Inbox Elimination to Keep You HonestToo Many InboxesGmail Mailboxes9. Cut out Back & Forth Steps10. For Some Use cases, Are Slack/Basecamp/Teams the Solution?Books to ReadYou need to prune down to what is important!!!Life Changing! We’ll do a book