Fresh Take: Danielle Bettmann on Positive Discipline

A note from Margaret: My family was visiting Kerrville, TX when the flood occurred. Having seen the devastation to the Hill Country first hand, it is impossible to put into words the scope of the disaster. These losses are close to home for my family and I know they have touched so many of you as well. Please join us in donating to the relief efforts by using the following trusted link: ⁠https://cftexashillcountry.fcsuite.com/erp/donate/create/fund?funit_id=4201⁠ Amy and Margaret talk with parenting coach Danielle Bettmann, host of the Failing Motherhood podcast. Danielle specializes in helping parents of strong-willed and neurodivergent kids implement positive discipline—a proven, research-based approach that’s both kind and firm. Danielle breaks down: What “positive discipline” really means (and what it’s not) Why traditional approaches like time-outs, yelling, and sticker charts backfire with sensitive or strong-willed children How to mirror your child’s emotions and validate without giving in How to co-parent with consistency, even when you and your partner are on different pages What boundary-seeking behavior tells us—and how to set limits that make kids feel safe How to respond when relatives say “Back in my day…” If your kid seems to only melt down for you, if you’re Googling parenting solutions at 3 a.m., or if you’ve tried everything and nothing’s working—this episode will give you practical strategies and a whole lot of validation. Learn how to avoid becoming your kid’s emotional punching bag, why saying “and” is more effective than “but,” and how to intentionally indulge without reinforcing bad behavior. Here's where you can find Danielle: www.parentingwholeheartedly.com @parent_wholeheartedly on IG @thatparentcoach on Tiktok Listen to "Failing Motherhood" here: https://www.parentingwholeheartedly.com/podcast We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A note from Margaret: My family was visiting Kerrville, TX when the flood occurred. Having seen the devastation to the Hill Country first hand, it is impossible to put into words the scope of the disaster. These losses are close to home for my family and I know they have touched so many of you as well. Please join us in donating to the relief efforts by using the following trusted link: https://cftexashillcountry.fcsuite.com/erp/donate/create/fund?funit_id=4201 In this episode, we break down five essential conversations parents should be having with their kids this summer. From online safety and media limits to emotional health and growth mindset, Amy and Margaret offer practical ways to open meaningful dialogue with your kids—without cornering them for awkward lectures. You'll learn how to talk about: 📱 Digital Life & Safety: Scam-proofing kids, screen time sanity, and talking tech boundaries. 🧠 Emotions & Mental Health: Helping kids name emotions, normalize asking for help, and express what they're feeling. 🚫 Respect, Consent & Boundaries: From the sandbox to social situations, how to model and enforce personal boundaries. 🌎 Kindness & Inclusion: Embracing diversity, talking openly about difference, and reinforcing family values. 💪 Growth Mindset & Resilience: Teaching kids how to face challenges, recover from failure, and develop a sense of possibility. Here are the themed playlists we've curated for each of these topics: Talking to Your Kids About Media and Technology Talking to Your Kids About Growing as a Person Talking to Your Kids About Kindness and Inclusion Talking to Your Kids About Emotions and Mental Health Talking to Your Kids About Respect, Consent, and Boundaries Here is Angela Duckworth's advice to the graduates of Bates College about phone usage. Here is an example of the pre-recorded conversations Amy mentioned that kids can use during ride shares. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, inclusive, inclusivity , transgender, trans kids, transgender kids, support for trans kids, trans rights, queer kids, respect, consent, teaching kids consent, digital safety, online safety, media literacy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Some people say parents should never lie to their kids. We are not those people. We asked our listeners to tell us all the lies that totally worked for their kids– or worked on them when they were kids. Whether it's the ice cream truck's jingle indicating they're fresh out, the goldfish who was "just sleeping," or the unfortunate catastrophic fire at the macaroni and cheese factory, these are all the mom fibs you want in your repertoire. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Ibram X. Kendi⁠ is the author of many highly acclaimed books including STAMPED FROM THE BEGINNING: The Definitive History of Racist Ideas in America, which won the National Book Award for Nonfiction. In 2020, Time magazine named Dr. Kendi one of the 100 most influential people in the world. Dr. Kendi was awarded a 2021 MacArthur Fellowship, popularly known as the Genius Grant. In this interview, we are discussing his book HOW TO RAISE AN ANTIRACIST. His latest book for young readers is called MALCOM LIVES and you can buy it here. In this interview, Dr. Kendi explains: why caregivers cannot protect young people from racism by ignoring what’s happening to our children why teaching antiracism is the best way to protect our children from racism's harms why children have an easier time understanding these ideas than we might think how putting off conversations about race, or giving kids the message that racism is unmentionable, can make our children prey to more sinister messaging It is never too early, or too late, to start raising our kids to be antiracist. Get ⁠How To Raise An Antiracist⁠ in our Bookshop store: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593242537 and find out more on Dr. Kendi's website: https://ibramxkendi.com We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, inclusive, inclusivity , anti-racism, racism, race, anti-racist education Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is it rational to still be mad about that time in second grade when the kid right in front of you took the last sprinkles at the ice cream social? Is it reasonable to think just a little less of your childhood friend for serving Chex Mix at his wedding? Ours is not to reason why. This episode isn't here to tell you whether you all should be maintaining these grudges so carefully. It's here to hold space for them all. Stay angry, Hellions! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we find support when our family of origin is no longer around or has otherwise rejected us? Francesca Royster, author of the new memoir ⁠Choosing Family: A Memoir of Queer Motherhood and Black Resistance⁠, explains the concepts of chosen family, finding joy in the everyday, and the resistance that is part of telling hard stories. Margaret and Francesca discuss: What inspired Francesca to write her memoir What it's like to enter motherhood at an older age The process of adopting her daughter Taking pleasure in the reality of everyday life can really help you connect with loved ones in your family, chosen or blood-related. And telling stories about hardship and tragedy can actually help us gain perspective and have more hope about the world, not less. Here's where you can find Francesca: ⁠Her faculty page on the DePaul University website⁠ @roysterfrancesca on IG @francesca.royster.1 on FB Buy Francesca's book:⁠ https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781419756177⁠ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, inclusive, inclusivity , transgender, trans kids, transgender kids, support for trans kids, trans rights, queer kids, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we start a conversation about finances with our partners, especially when each of our households of origin might have thought about money quite differently? Ramit Sethi, host of Netflix’s hit show, How to Get Rich, and author of MONEY FOR COUPLES, offers practical tips for productively discussing money with your partner. Ramit and Margaret discuss: Why money conversations are so hard The four money types: Avoider, Optimizer, Worrier, or Dreamer How the messages we heard (or didn’t hear) about money growing up shape our adult decisions—and how to teach kids better. Age-appropriate ways to talk to your kids about money, build financial literacy, and model strong values. Here's where to find Ramit: www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com Buy MONEY FOR COUPLES: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781523523689 Listen to the Money for Couples podcast: https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/ Watch Ramit's Netflix show @ramit on IG and X Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There are plenty of things that seem intimidating but are actually not that hard to do! From power hedge trimmers to cooking a whole fish, we (and our listeners) are here with the things that most people seem to think are hard—but actually aren't. View the full list of things our listeners said are actually pretty simple. Plus, the two things we promised to include in the show notes: an actually-easy way to create Power of Attorney forms for kids off to college an actually easy and attractive way to store sets of sheets We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ellen Kahn⁠ is the Senior Director of Programs and Partnerships at the Human Rights Campaign. In her role, Ellen provides national leadership and expertise in public education and advocacy efforts on behalf of LGBTQ youth and families. Ellen is nationally recognized as an expert on LGBTQ family life and LGBTQ youth. She's also a proud mom of two teenage daughters. In this interview, Ellen explains how parents can create a home environment that affirms and accepts LGBTQ children, and how to advocate for LGBTQ kids in the larger world– whether they're our own children or not. As Ellen explains: "It's all of us together, chiseling away at the reason parents can be fearful when they find out their child is LGBTQ. Let's just not raise bullies anymore." Here are a few additional resources mentioned in this episode: Human Rights Campaign's ⁠welcomingschools.org⁠ ⁠pflag.org⁠ "Serendipitydodah- Home of the Mama Bears" Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Serendipitydodah We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, inclusive, inclusivity , transgender, trans kids, transgender kids, support for trans kids, trans rights, queer kids, lgbtq kids Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Amy chats with Dr. Morgan Cutlip about her new book A Better Share, which offers practical, research-based strategies for managing the mental load in relationships. They discuss how default parenting, gender socialization, and communication missteps can create resentment—and how couples can reconnect through clarity and shared responsibility. You’ll hear why the mental load is the real relationship villain, not your partner— and how to invite your partner into the solution . Amy and Morgan discuss: why our invisible labor is so hard to talk about without sparking defensiveness why curiosity offers a secret to lasting connection how being the default parent impacts one's desire for intimacy how to help kids develop initiative, not just complete chores the power of “gracious interpretations” and the ultimate compliment formula Here's where you can find Morgan: https://drmorgancutlip.com Listen to Morgan's podcast "Love Thinks" @drmorgancutlip on IG Buy A BETTER SHARE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781400239672 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, household equity, household equality, gender household equality, gender household equity, maternal mental health, postpartum health, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices