The Day The Test Changed Everything

You can be deeply in love and still be holding back the words that would actually help. We’re Roz and Mike, and we’re opening up about the private thoughts we didn’t say to each other in the early days of marriage, the expectations we carried in quietly, and the moments when reality hit hard after the honeymoon.We talk about what it feels like to adjust to a new home and new roles overnight, how loneliness can show up even when you’re not “alone”, and why knowing who you are (for us, identity in Christ) matters before life gets complicated. Mike shares what it took to move from his old single mindset into being a husband with boundaries, responsibility, and a commitment to build peace at home, especially as our fertility journey added pressure.We also get honest about intimacy after a long season of celibacy, and why clear, respectful conversations about sex, comfort, and connection are not optional for newlyweds. Then we connect the dots to miscarriage grief, the emotional toll of IVF, and the challenge of “saying the right thing at the right time” when hormones, hope, and disappointment are all turned up loud. We even touch on leadership and workplace culture, and why KPIs should never matter more than the human story behind the performance.If you’re navigating fertility struggles, miscarriage recovery, IVF decisions, or simply trying to communicate better in marriage, this conversation is for you. Subscribe, share it with a couple who needs it, and leave a review so more people on this road can find us.

Ep 2: The Day the Test Changed EverythingA positive pregnancy test can feel like a door finally opening. Then it can slam shut without warning.We go back to the moment we saw our first positive during lockdown. We were still waiting on the NHS pathway and thinking IVF was our next step. We talk about the symptoms that sparked the test, the split-second disbelief, and the small rituals that made it real: a babygrow on the bed, a prayer on our knees, and a photo we still remember frame by frame.Before that, we rewind to our foundations, because fertility struggles don't happen in a vacuum. Culture, family expectations, faith, and doing the formalities properly all shaped us. Yes, we revisit the second date where errands nearly ended everything.Then comes the hard turn: bleeding starts days after that positive result. We talk about the fear of miscarriage, having to tell your partner straight after you've celebrated, and the tension between medical advice and what faith sounds like in real time. It's raw and honest, and it's full of the feelings people usually hide.In this episode (0:00) Cold open and our promise (2:24) How our relationship moved fast (10:28) The infamous second date errands (18:04) Rings, family meetings and foundations (24:36) Our first positive test during lockdown (30:50) When the bleeding starts (36:30) Support, a game and goodbyes (39:32) Post-chat reflections and thanksComing up this season Donors · reproductive health · illnesses that affect conception · support at work · nutrition · surrogacy · why these are not bad wordsFeatured: The Rainbow Diaries Ros created The Rainbow Journal to support anyone processing miscarriage and navigating the journey to conceiving. It gives you space to reflect, find clarity and hold on to gratitude along the way.Get your copy: https://therainbowdiaries.com/product/the-rainbow-journal/ Visit: https://therainbowdiaries.com/Support & resourcesThe Miscarriage Association, which offers support and information after pregnancy loss: https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/HFEA, the UK fertility regulator, with a clinic search and treatment guides: https://www.hfea.gov.ukNICE fertility guidelines, which set out what the NHS should offer: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg156Fertility Action, which runs free peer support groups: https://fertilityaction.org/fertility-support-groups/Peanut, a community app for women at every stage, including TTC: https://www.peanut-app.ioIf our story helps you feel less alone, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people on this journey can find Trying Together.Follow & subscribe: tryingtogetherpodcast.com

Ep 1: Why Share the Story Before the Miracle?Nine years of trying to conceive changes how you see everything: your faith, your marriage, your friendships, your own body. We're Ros and Mike, and we nearly didn't press record. Then we remembered why.Fertility is a minefield. Information is scattered, the language is clinical, and men are too often left out of the conversation entirely. We're not scientists, and we're not here to perform perfection. But if our story helps even one person feel less alone, or better informed, it's worth it.In this first episode, we go back to the beginning: how we met, the early concerns and appointments, pregnancy loss, hospital monitoring, and the strain lockdown added. We talk about stigma, especially in African culture, and how fear can show up as silence. We also share what's helped us in the middle of it: prayer, intentional check-ins, and journalling.In this episode (0:00) Welcome and what this is (4:19) Infertility stats and why it matters (5:50) How we met and moved fast (23:21) Defining the podcast as a safe space (28:19) Our timeline from PCOS to IVF (37:50) The signs that pushed us (38:29) Fears, stigma and The Rainbow Journal (46:07) Card questions on faith and waiting (57:07) Closing thoughts, support and linksComing up this season Donors · reproductive health · illnesses that affect conception · support at work · nutrition · surrogacy · why these are not bad wordsFeatured: The Rainbow Diaries Ros created The Rainbow Journal to support anyone processing miscarriage and navigating the journey to conceiving. It gives you space to reflect, find clarity and hold on to gratitude along the way. Get your copy: https://therainbowdiaries.com/product/the-rainbow-journal/ Visit: https://therainbowdiaries.com/Support & resourcesHFEA, the UK fertility regulator, with a clinic search and treatment guides: https://www.hfea.gov.ukNICE fertility guidelines, which set out what the NHS should offer: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg156Fertility Action, which runs free peer support groups: https://fertilityaction.org/fertility-support-groups/Peanut, a community app for women at every stage, including TTC: https://www.peanut-app.ioIf this resonates, subscribe and share Trying Together with someone who needs it. What part of the waiting season is hardest for you? Tell us in a review.Follow & subscribe: tryingtogetherpodcast.com