The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast podcast

Episode 390: AI Armor: Using AI to Protect Yourself in a High-Conflict Divorce with Rina Rosewell

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Can AI help women protect themselves in a high-conflict divorce? Many women are already using it to respond to their exes, while others are cautious of it, worried their history could be subpoenaed. So I invited Rina Rosewell to the show to talk about some of the topics covered in her book, AI ARMOR: Your Digital Defense Solution for Coparenting with a Narcissist. Rina has thought deeply about how survivors can use AI well, and also where it can go wrong.

Together, we talk about why so much of what we read online now sounds like AI, why a chatbot that tells people what they want to hear is a narcissist's dream, and how AI can make an abuser's messages sound smoother and more reasonable even though his actions don't change.

Rina also shares the prompts she's created to help women step out of fear, respond strategically, and translate their experiences into what she calls "judgish," the language judges are more apt to respond to. Finally, we dig into the challenge of being authentic and strategic at the same time in court, which Rina calls the worst game of Twister ever. The bottom line is that AI can be a powerful ally for survivors, but only when they know how to use it well and understand its limits.

What you'll hear about in this episode:

  • Why a translator and copywriter, not a tech expert, was the right person to write a book about AI for survivors (2:24)
  • How AI can help women practice for the questions they'll face in court or from a custody evaluator (17:31)
  • What goes into Rina's two-page "Yellow Rock" prompt, and why most prompts fall flat (25:30)
  • What survivors should know about discovery and confidentiality, and why fear of their ChatGPT history being used against them shouldn't keep women from getting help (31:04)
  • How asking AI "Where am I going wrong?" can help sharpen critical thinking (36:09)

Learn more about Rina Rosewell:

Rina Rosewell knows what it's like when your ex turns every text message into a battlefield. As a CDC Certified Divorce Coach and High-Conflict Coach, she's spent years helping post-separation abuse survivors find their footing after leaving coercively controlling partners.

She wrote AI ARMOR: Your Digital Defense Solution for Coparenting with a Narcissist to solve a real problem: what do you do at 2 a.m. when your ex sends another manipulative message and your brain shuts down? You use AI.

Rina holds an MA in Advanced Language Skills with a thesis focused on judicial interpretation, and brings 20+ years of experience as a professional translator and copywriter. She understands better than most how language is used as both a weapon and a lifeline in high-conflict family court situations.

She moderates a private local Facebook support community for moms, writes a weekly newsletter to inspire and empower victims of post-separation abuse, and works with clients across Canada and beyond.

Resources & Links:

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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

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