Touching Your Bits

In the first episode of season 2, I (Stef, no longer with the wife Alistair) take a deep dive into Joe Rogan's podcast episodes with Jordan Peterson, and Robert Malone. Both episodes have incited controversy due to promoting various conspiratorial thoughts, namely climate change denial in the case of Peterson, and anti-vaccine rhetoric by Malone.I look at how people, but mainly men in positions of power, use argumentation and their own rhetoric to convince others of their viewpoints, whether or not that viewpoint has an overall positive moral effect for society. Too often those in a position of authority present misleading facts for the sake of being right, rather than providing beneficial information, which is often tied in with power, be it based on gender, class, or race.

In the second part of our two episodes on chivalry, we make the distinction between acts of kindness and chivalry.We identify chivalry as a performance, something self-serving wrongly veiled as self-denial. In light of conversations that have caught more attention since the murder of Sarah Everard, we look at how positive acts to make women feel safer are quite the opposite to chivalry, in that they’re not self-serving and put others people’s comfort and safety first.We look at other conversations around gender in the media and how that influences societal views on masculinity. We explore how masculine ideals and chivalric codes are necessary to support masculinity because it is, ultimately, fragile, i.e. it’s not a real thing. Giving a little bit of a history lesson, we also look at the parallels between chivalry and colonialism.

In this two-parter, we get on our high horses and talk about chivalry. We discuss the historical origins of the idea, how it's developed into the present day, and how even when it isn't rooted in physical violence, it still serves to maintain control.We explore how crucial honour is in relation to chivalry and how violence is used to preserve honour in different contexts. In the second part we take a closer look at chivalry in the present day and explore what we can do to change behaviours so that they're loess rooted in control.

In this episode we discuss guns, gun violence, and their relationship with men. We look at the often over-looked relationship between domestic violence (or domestic terrorism) and public terrorism. This also leads us to touch on how networks of inspiration (and manipulation) develop among terrorists.While we're just some lowly British citizens, we also consider the particularities of guns and gun culture in the USA in a little more depth. We also explore our own exposure to guns from a young age - how violence is so central to the concept of manhood as children become gendered as boys and conditioned into men.

In this episode Alistair just will not shut up about swimming lessons at school.But more seriously, we talk about body image, how it's so commonplace to comment on people's bodies growing up, and how people do or don't break away from harsh words in the changing rooms. We confront the age-old fear of getting a boner in the changing rooms and how it's totally normal and probably won't happen ever if we just realised it was a normal concern.We chat a bit about banter among young men and particularly jokes passed down by older men, as well the impressions they leave on us. It's quite easy to look back at people we might have thought were legends when we were younger and realise they were quite sad, really. Finally we talk about what it's okay to be fond of in masculine-dominated circles. What parts of humour in male circles should be cherished and what should be called out as problematic?Class plays into a bit too, Alistair grew up in rural Scotland and Stefan in a largely working-class town in Yorkshire, so we can't talk for everyone - but the men are the common link at the end of the day.

In this episode we look at how men can reflect on their own behaviours in light of the Sarah Everard case. We explore how such violence often takes place and how men can be more honest about the roots of violence - including how close to home it is. We're ultimately all responsible to make changes as men.We discuss a bit of feminist geography (ooo fancy) exploring urban spaces and the ideas behind gendered fear. We also delve into how the Sarah Everard case has been portrayed in the media, receiving more attention than other horrific cases, often overlooked largely due to race and class. We round up by picking apart the argument of "not all men" with a bit of sympathy, because unfortunately, "yes, all men".We don't play a silly quiz in the episode because it's not a funny topic - like wanking or poutine - but we do read out a hilariously baffling tweet regarding gender-based violence.Refs:Feminist City by Leslie KernFrames of War by Judith Butler (Stef meant "grievable lives" not "mournable lives")

We’re talking about every adolescent boy’s favourite subject. Bashing the bishop, spanking the monkey, or just plain old touching your bits. We ask why is there such a stigma, where do the taboos come from, and how can men learn from feminist conversations about masturbation. Tune in for the world’s first (and probably last) round of “Wank or No Wank”.Refs:With the Hand: A Cultural History of Masturbation by Mels van Driel;Beauty by Roger Scruton

Key political leaders through the lens of masculinity, in particular Trump and Johnson. We discuss how narratives around male leaders emphasise conflict, toughness, and the need to win. After exploring how elite cultures sustain such attitudes and during the pandemic, we round off with a fun little quiz - “Putin or Poutine?”Refs:Angry White Men: American Masculinity at the End of an Era by Michael Kimmel.Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man by Mary L. Trump

In our pilot episode we take as our talking point a fascinating article from the London Review of Books by Amia Srinivasan titled Does Anyone Have The Right To Sex? In it, Srinivasan recounts the killing spree of self-pronounced “incel” Elliot Rodger in California, 2014. She uses this horrific event to open up a wider discussion around identity and desire, asking why certain people are considered less desirable and what can be done to challenge this. We use this article to discuss how men and people with more privileged identities can change attitudes that they think are “just a preference” and explore how preferences and prejudices impact dating on apps and in the bedroom.Link to article: https://www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v40/n06/amia-srinivasan/does-anyone-have-the-right-to-sex