237. Control and the Works Mentality

Episode 241-Finding Freedom One minute I was sitting in the green metal lawn chair in my uncle’s front yard, talking and laughing with my aunt while cousins and our children played hide and go seek. The next minute I felt the bending and eventual collapse of the rounded legs of the chair as they slowly lowered me to the ground. Even though I’m sure the sight of a 430-pound woman sitting on a pile of metal was funny, all laughter stopped. My uncle jumped up to help me. Being super morbidly obese I always tried to blend into the wallpaper and not make more of a spectacle of myself any more than I already was. That day, however, the proverbial cat had been let out of the bag. I’m fat, really fat. I break lawn chairs like twigs. I can’t be trusted to sit anywhere. I knew I had a problem. I denied it constantly. I tried to push it under the rug. However, I could no longer ignore the obvious. I was a really good Christian. I didn’t drink alcoholic beverages. I’d never done drugs, smoked cigarettes, had sex before marriage, gone to an X-rated movie, watched or listened to pornography. I went to church every Sunday. I taught Sunday School and small groups. I worked in ministry. And I was a glutton.   Overcomers Academy link: https://Teresashieldsparker.com/overcomers/  

Episode 240-What God Wants I’ve learned since childhood that I should listen to God. I knew He wanted me to give up sugar and flour and eat more meat, fruits, and vegetables. However, I continued to do the opposite. I was like the people of Jeremiah’s day. “We will not listen to your messages from the Lord. We will do whatever we want … For in those days we had plenty to eat, and we were well off and had no troubles!” (Jeremiah 4:16-17 NLT). My desire to do my own thing regarding what I ate and how I didn’t exercise or listen to God about my health was not working. As a matter of fact, I was eating myself into an early grave. I was eating myself to death and thinking I was having a great time doing it. Because of what I had done to myself, in 1999 I found myself lying in a hospital bed awaiting the results of an angioplasty. The very rude cardiac surgeon came into my room, looked at me and without compassion said, “You don't need open heart surgery. You need to lose at least 100 pounds and keep it off or you'll be dead in five years.” Then, he promptly turned and walked out of the room leaving me very alone. My world came to a screeching halt. I had just been given a death sentence.  Overcomers Academy link: https://teresashieldsparker.com/overcomers  

Episode 239-King of My Heart Who or what is King of your heart, the most important thing in your life? The first stanza of the song, King of My Heart says, “I’m in a war every minute. I know for sure I’ll never win it. I am David up against Goliath and it’s a fight for my attention. I’m being pulled every direction.” However, David’s real giant was not a huge hairy man, but a beautiful woman named Bathsheba. He saw her. He wanted her. He took her even though she was married and knew it was wrong. I so relate to David because I had a love affair too. His name was Sugar and He tasted so good.  Let me tell you when something takes over as King of your heart, it’s not easy to dethrone it. But, here’s how. One-on-One Coaching Link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/one-on-one-coaching/ Overcomers Academy Link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/overcomers/.

Episode 238-Intimacy I love this episode! I love talking about real intimacy with my husband and with Jesus. Intimacy is a deep, close relationship that makes us feel validated and safe  In simple language  Jesus told us how to be his intimate friends “You show you are my intimate friends when you obey all that I command you … I call you My intimate friends for I reveal to you everything I have heard from My Father” (John 15:14-15 TPT).  Obedience to God unlocks the door to intimacy with Him. Trust then becomes the foundation for intimacy with Jesus, as well as deep and true intimacy with our husbands and other loved ones.. One-on-One Coaching link: https://www.teresashieldsparker.com/one-on-one-coaching/. Overcomers Academy link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/Overcomers/.

One of my issues growing up was I was the oldest child and my mother had many issues that caused her to be unable to do a lot of household duties. Many of these fell to me because otherwise they wouldn’t get done. So, as the oldest child of three, I stepped into a controlling, bossy mini-Mom.  From an early age I took on a works mentality. I took over Mom’s duties to they would get done. I did housework, laundry, cooked supper, took care of the kids, and did my own homework and school activities. I was always working. It was who I was. I became an in-charge Martha. Finally came the day, though, when God showed me how wrong I was.  One-on-One Coaching link: https://teresashieldsparker.com/one-on-one-coaching.

Episode 236-Hiding from Fear? Are you afraid of people, things you failed at, things that want to make you go somewhere and hide and never come out again? Many are. This episode contains a fictional story about a woman who wanted to just live never having to deal with fear. When she thought about stepping outside the room, she felt naked, exposed, and vulnerable. To go for her dreams felt way too difficult, impossible, and scary. Fear can keep us stuck. Fear can cause us to disconnect from everyone we love. Fear can cause us to even hide from ourselves and make us stop trying to reach the dreams God has placed inside us. This woman learns how to step into life and go for her dreams. You can as well. Overcomers Academy link: https://teresashieldsparker.com/overcomers/ One-on-One Coaching link: https://teresashieldsparker.com/one-on-one-coaching/

Episode 235-Self-Effort Are you doing things in your own self-effort? Or are you doing them with God’s help and strength? How do you know? How can you do things with Him instead of for yourself? Overcomers Academy link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/Overcomers  

Episode 234-Who Am I? Who am I? Who are you? Many times in our lives, people knowingly or unknowingly tell us who we are. This happened to me when I was six years old. At the time, I didn’t really know what was said would define me. I tried to push it out of my mind. It stayed there until another similar statement when I was an adult jogged my memory. And I realized how what was said along with what others said had set the tone for my life. I finally understood that I should allow no one but God to set the direction for my life. After all, He is the only One who truly knows me and can lead me. He is the only One who knows who I am and what I will become. I will follow Him. Overcomers Academy link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/Overcomers

Episode 233-Forgiven I sat on the back deck of the lodge at the north rim of the Grand Canyon while my family was hiking. I just wanted to sit there forever and take in the glory and the splendor of God’s majestic, vast creation. The canyon is miles across. It looked huge. I thought of the song, “There is a cross to bridge the great divide.” The width of the chasm visibly reinforced the fact there is a wide gulf between me and God. There is no earthly way I can jump to the other side of the Grand Canyon.  As a human many things look impossible, but with God everything is possible, especially forgiveness. Overcomers Academy link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/overcomers

Episode 232-Am I Greedy? I never really thought of myself as greedy, but my journey has really been one of greed. What is greed? The definition of greed is “an intense and selfish desire for something, especially wealth, power, or food.” Did you get that? It’s not just an intense desire for money or position. It’s also a selfish desire for food!  Are you greedy? Listen to this episode to find out if you are and what to do about it. Overcomers Academy Link: https://TeresaShieldsParker.com/Overcomers/