Episode 7: Pride and Promiscuity

In this episode, I read You Don't Love Me Yet by Jonathan Lethem. No, I don't. That's it. I can't be bothered to write any more about it. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN Also apparently Amazon is going to start hosting podcasts, so I might be there soon too! Keep an eye out.

In this episode, I broke the format and read a newer release, not yet on the Worst List, but certainly on its way there: The Stars and Stripes Between Us, by Audrey Rivero. You know, sometimes I wonder if other countries have this problem of oversimplification of politics, but then I remember that there aren't really a lot of other countries that stake their entire governmental system on two diametrically opposed political unions. Isn't American exceptionalism fun? U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! ...we're doomed. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN Also apparently Amazon is going to start hosting podcasts, so I might be there soon too! Keep an eye out.

In this episode, I read The Widows of Eastwick, the final novel by two-time Pulitzer Prize winner John Updike. Reading this with no context was like if the first Marvel related property you ever experienced was Endgame, if Endgame wasn't a billion dollar capstone to a major blockbuster franchise but a book about three women decades after the story in which they originally debuted. In other news, today I learned that I'm not great at making comparisons. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read Rainbow Party by Paul Ruditis. Symptoms of Paul Ruditis include paper thin characters, lazy writing, and an irrational fear of teenagers, to the point where you write a whole screed against what they may or may not be doing. If you or a loved one may be suffering from Paul Ruditis, it may not be too late. Please see a doctor, or a professional editor, as soon as possible. In time, we may develop a vaccine, or even a cure. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen, by Arielle Eckstut, Dennis Ashton, and David Washburn. Poor Jane Austen. She didn't make strides in female authorship in the 18th and 19th centuries just to end up on the bum end of bad fanfiction. Thank God the Bronte sisters have been spared... I think. I'm scared to see if any exist for them. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read The Chemistry of Tears, a novel by two-time Man Booker winner Peter Carey. Hey, not everyone bats 1000 all the time. Sometimes you strike out. I... think this is a strike out. I mean, he won the Man Booker twice, so he's definitely no Robert Stanek, right? ...right? Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read Women Who Work, a self help book for working class women by Ivanka Trump, who is definitely the voice that every working class woman wants to hear when they need advice for how to be a better worker. Definitely. Also this book cost me $15 dollars, so I think that's the real advice here: charge more than $10 for a book of inspirational quotes. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read Confessions of a Sociopathic Social Climber by Adèle Lang. This reminds me of Diary of a Wimpy Kid, if Greg Heffley were a middle aged woman instead of a middle schooler. Everything else is the same though. Yes, even the Cheese Touch. Especially the Cheese Touch. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I read Pride/Prejudice, a Pride and Prejudice fan fiction by Ann Herendeen. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good podcast, must be in want of a book to read. This... this isn't it though. Oh my God is this not it. Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN

In this episode, I review Oroonoko by Aphra Behn, a 1688 novel about slavery. If "it's not as bad as it could have been" is the best thing that I can say about your book, then... yeah, we're in for a bit of a doozy here. To offset the ickiness that I felt reading this book, especially in the current climate, I feel the need to ask you to donate to a charity, or sign a petition, or do... something, anything, to help society. A list of charities and petitions can be found here: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/. Find one that speaks to you and help. Goodreads link for the book here: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/51190.Oroonoko Listen on these sites: Anchor - https://anchor.fm/cracked-spines Breaker - https://www.breaker.audio/cracked-spines-1 Google Podcasts - https://tinyurl.com/y8t5dukn Overcast - https://overcast.fm/itunes1521229755/cracked-spines PocketCasts - https://pca.st/n9uusne1 Radiopublic - https://radiopublic.com/cracked-spines-6nZ50y Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/3rMry3V2mfQr7nm3vlkzGN