Understanding Vaginismus

In this episode, Andrea explores asexuality — what it means, what it doesn’t mean, and why sexual attraction, desire and arousal aren't necessarily the same thing. Because yes, an asexual person can experience arousal, have a libido, masturbate, have fantasies, enjoy sex and fall deeply in love.Most importantly, asexuality is real, it exists on a spectrum, and there isn't one “right” way to be ace.SourcesBrotto, L.A. & Yule, M. (2016). Asexuality: Sexual orientation, paraphilia, sexual dysfunction, or none of the above? Archives of Sexual Behavior, 46, 619–627. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Let’s Simply Talk About Sex, Relationships & Everything In Between, Andrea takes the awkwardness out of the conversation and explores why condoms matter, how to use them properly, and how safer sex can still be fun and sexy. From choosing the right condom and using lubricant to navigating trust, latex allergies and conversations about STI testing, this episode offers practical, shame-free advice for taking care of your sexual health.Sources* NHS Sexual Health – contraception, condoms, STI testing and sexual health information* Brook – accessible sexual health and contraception information* Sexwise – independent sexual health and relationship information* Terrence Higgins Trust – sexual health, HIV and STI informationFor personalised advice, STI testing or concerns following condom breakage or unprotected sex, speak to a sexual health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What Is Sex Therapy? Sex therapy. It sounds intimidating — clinical, serious, maybe even awkward. But in reality? It’s simply a safe, confidential space to talk about sex with a trained professional — without shame, pressure, or judgement. Spoiler: it’s talking — not touching. Sex therapy is a professional, confidential talking therapy. It is educational, psychological, and relational — not physical or hands-on.Sourceshttps://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/24524-sex-therapist Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We’ve had a little makeover! Conversations We Need to Have is now: Let’s Simply Talk About Sex, Relationships and Everything in Between. Same topics. Same honest conversations. Just a simpler, more relaxed approach. We’re moving away from anything that feels like a lecture and towards conversations that are easy to follow, relatable and hopefully a little more fun. No complicated explanations. No information overload. Just… let’s simply talk about it.If you’ve listened before, thank you for being here. And if you’re new — welcome!Anxiety is something we all experience, but what if the problem isn’t anxiety itself — but the way we respond to it? In this episode, Andrea explores anxiety as an over-sensitive alarm system rather than something that means we’re broken. Drawing on ideas from Barry McDonagh’s DARE Response, she looks at why fighting, avoiding and trying to control anxiety can actually keep it going — and what happens when we respond differently.Sources* Barry McDonagh – DARE Response – An approach to responding to anxiety and panic by reducing fear and resistance rather than fighting the sensations.* DARE: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks – Barry McDonagh.* NHS – Anxiety and Panic – Information about anxiety, panic attacks and available support.Support If anxiety or panic is significantly affecting your everyday life, relationships or ability to do the things you want to do, consider speaking to a qualified mental health professional or your GP. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Andrea explores one of the great paradoxes of love: why sexual desire fades even in relationships filled with affection, loyalty, and trust.Love and desire play by completely different rules — love craves closeness, comfort, and safety, while desire thrives on distance, curiosity, and mystery.And yet we expect one person to provide both.Andrea breaks down how to reignite desire without swapping partners or adding pressure — by reintroducing imagination, autonomy, and play.Sources Mating in Captivity – Esther PerelThe State of Affairs – Esther Perel Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Andrea explores vaginismus — a condition that affects many women and people with vaginas, but is often misunderstood or hidden behind silence and shame.Because vaginismus isn’t a flaw — it’s a fear response.And once the body feels safe again, pain can ease and pleasure can return.If you want to see Andrea demonstrate the dilators - this episode is also on YouTube Resources:Come As You Are — Emily Nagoski, PhDWhen Sex Hurts — Andrew Goldstein, Caroline Pukall & Irwin GoldsteinBritish Association for Sexual and Relationship Therapy (BASRT.org.uk) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Conversations We Need To Have, Andrea explores the deeply human experience of grief and bereavement.While we often associate grief with death, loss can take many forms — the end of a relationship, retirement, illness, changes in health, financial difficulties, or even grieving something we never had in the first place. Drawing on two widely respected grief models, Andrea explains why grief is rarely predictable, why there is no "correct" way to grieve, and how understanding the grieving process can help us offer ourselves and others a little more compassion.Because grief isn't something we get over — it's something we learn to carry. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Conversations We Need To Have, Andrea explores the complex and often misunderstood topic of chemsex — the use of certain drugs before or during sexual activity to enhance pleasure, connection, and intimacy. Rather than focusing on judgement, this episode looks at the psychological, social, and emotional factors that can make chemsex appealing, particularly within some LGBTQ+ communities. It also explores the risks, the realities of recovery, and why compassion is more effective than shame. Because understanding chemsex means understanding the human need for connection, belonging, and acceptance.Resources MentionedControlling ChemsexCOSRT (College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Conversations We Need to Have, Andrea opens up an honest, much-needed conversation about masturbation during perimenopause, menopause, and beyond — a topic many people were never encouraged to talk about, yet one that can be genuinely life-enhancing.If masturbation feels awkward, embarrassing, or “not for you,” this episode gently invites you to pause and stay curious. Because masturbation isn’t just normal during menopause — it can support physical health, emotional wellbeing, sleep, mood, vaginal health, and your relationship with your body.Andrea explains why sex therapists often recommend regular masturbation during menopause, how hormonal changes affect arousal and sensation, and why pleasure is not indulgent — it’s biological, accessible self-care.This is a shame-free, practical exploration of how reconnecting with your body can help you feel more comfortable, confident, and at home in yourself during a time of significant change. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Conversations We Need To Have, Andrea explores the world of kink and BDSM — what it is, what it isn’t, and why conversations about consent, communication, trust, safety, and pleasure matter so much. BDSM is often misunderstood in mainstream culture. Many people assume it’s about pain, abuse, or dysfunction — but healthy BDSM is built on something very different: informed consent, negotiated boundaries, emotional awareness, and mutual respect. This episode offers a broad, shame-free introduction to BDSM and kink practices, including common terminology, relationship dynamics, fetish culture, community spaces, aftercare, and the role communication plays in ethical kink. Whether BDSM is personally relevant to you or not, understanding it without stigma helps us have healthier conversations about sexuality, intimacy, identity, and human diversity. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.