Why Change Works

What do you do when someone you love drinks and drives? In this Q&A episode of Bottled Up, John tackles this particularly difficult dilemma and explores the choices, responsibilities and potential consequences involved when a loved one’s drinking puts other people at risk. We also answer listeners’ questions about what happens when the drinking stops but the damaging behaviour continues, whether counselling alone is enough, and how to plan an effective intervention — including who should be there, what they should contribute and why choosing the right people matters.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Change can feel impossible when alcohol has taken over family life – but you’re not powerless. In this episode, John talks about why change works and how families can help create the conditions that encourage it. John talks about why problem drinkers often fear life without alcohol, the importance of allowing consequences to happen, setting boundaries and building positive alternatives. Crucially, change isn’t about taking responsibility for someone else’s drinking. It’s about recognising that you can change your own responses, reclaim your life and influence the environment around the drinker – making lasting change more likely.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you’re struggling and wondering what to do next, perhaps it’s time to talk. Living with problem drinking can leave you exhausted, confused and questioning your own judgement. Sometimes, simply talking to someone who genuinely understands can make an enormous difference.In this episode John talks through Bottled Up’s one-to-one counselling and how it can help anybody affected by problem drinking. Whether you need someone to listen, reassurance that you’re not imagining the problem, practical tools to help you cope, or ongoing support, sessions are tailored to what you need.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode John talks about what happened to him after he stopped drinking. For many family members and drinkers they do not realise that stopping drinking is only the start of a better life. John reflects on his own difficult early months of sobriety, from cravings, isolation and low self-esteem to gradually rebuilding a life without alcohol. He discusses the role Alcoholics Anonymous and a programme of support played in his recovery, the importance of routine, friendship and support, and how he slowly began to rediscover his confidence and sense of purpose. For families, John offers a message of hope: people can and do change, but recovery involves much more than simply stopping drinking.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, John talks about the Dry Drunk (also known as white knuckling). John explores the difference between simply stopping drinking and genuine recovery. He explains the idea of the “dry drunk”, or “white knuckling” — when alcohol has been removed but the underlying issues remain – anger, resentment, shame, guilt, personal insecurity and other deep-rooted difficulties. John discusses why abstinence alone may leave both the drinker and their family feeling vulnerable, and why structured recovery involves confronting the reasons behind the drinking. He looks at responsibility, making amends and dealing with difficult character traits, arguing that stopping drinking is only the beginning: recovery is about change, healing and building a new life.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode John talks to Ben about one of the most confusing and frustrating aspects of addiction: denial. The deception, dishonesty and lies can be maddening. But is something more powerful and complex at work? Drawing on John's own experience of alcoholism and his experience as a professor of addiction and counsellor, John explains why many drinkers genuinely struggle to recognise the problem, why blame and excuses become part of addiction, and why families so often feel gaslit, angry, frustrated, offended and exhausted. John discusses practical ways to avoid being drawn into impossible arguments, focus on the consequences rather than the drinking itself, and explain why hope—not confrontation—is often the key to lasting change.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode John answers your questions. He looks at the question of tough love or punishment, setting boundaries, and deaing with anger.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode Lou and John discuss the common mistakes that derail interventions, the importance of preparation, involving trusted family and friends, understanding your legal and practical options, and the importance of speaking from personal experience rather than blame. Many families reach the point where they know something has to change, but a well-intentioned intervention can easily go off course before it has even begun. John and Lou explore the difference between emotional, spur-of-the-moment confrontations and a carefully planned intervention that gives a drinker the best chance of choosing recovery. Even when an intervention doesn't succeed, the process can empower families with knowledge, confidence and hope.Download the book here: https://bottled-up.com/bottled-up-books/intervention-book/You can buy the new book here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Plan-Deliver-Effective-Intervention/dp/B0H7N7TTC7/ref=sr_1_1?crid=15TLHJG2HWXB3&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.1aduMjkxp1noSrWAmgxtEw.4K_dPeGHsdbdPbcxiY_QBYWyXcYxW12byxFqz6UL6_I&dib_tag=se&keywords=john+mcmahon+intervention+bottled+up&qid=1784480832&sprefix=john+mcmahon+intervention+bottled+up%2Caps%2C132&sr=8-1For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Family interventions are one of the most effective yet least-used ways of helping someone with a drinking problem. Many families assume they are too complicated or fear making things worse, but a well-planned intervention can become a powerful catalyst for change. In this episode, John and Lou talk about John's new book "How to Plan and Deliver an Effective Intervention" and explore a practical, step-by-step approach to preparing and delivering an intervention with confidence, compassion and purpose. They discuss why success isn't measured solely by whether the drinker accepts help. Even when the outcome isn't immediate, the process itself can empower families, strengthen boundaries and help loved ones regain hope, clarity and control.Download the book here: https://bottled-up.com/bottled-up-books/intervention-book/You can buy the new book here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Plan-Deliver-Effective-Intervention/dp/B0H7N7TTC7/ref=sr_1_1?crid=15TLHJG2HWXB3&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.1aduMjkxp1noSrWAmgxtEw.4K_dPeGHsdbdPbcxiY_QBYWyXcYxW12byxFqz6UL6_I&dib_tag=se&keywords=john+mcmahon+intervention+bottled+up&qid=1784480832&sprefix=john+mcmahon+intervention+bottled+up%2Caps%2C132&sr=8-1For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Deciding whether to leave a loved one who has a drinking problem is one of the most difficult choices anyone can face. In this episode, Lou and John explore how to recognise when that moment has arrived, balancing compassion with the need to protect yourself and your family. They discuss the importance of safety, seeking objective advice, understanding your legal and financial position, and avoiding rushed decisions driven by guilt or fear. The conversation also examines children, boundaries, and preparing emotionally and practically, helping listeners make informed decisions while remembering that, apart from safety, the final choice is always their own.For 1-2-1 counselling with John visit: https://bottled-up.com/1-to-1/Please be very clear that, at Bottled Up we strongly advise people not to remain in violent or abusive relationships. We understand fully that in many cases circumstances can become untenable. We discuss this fully in our Podcast "Should I Stay or Should I Go".For more information on the service Bottled Up provides, visit: www.bottled-up.comDr John McMahon is a professor and was the senior lecturer for addiction counsellors at the University of the West of Scotland. He has led prominent studies into alcohol addiction for more than 15 years. Before this, for many years, John had an addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for over 40 years.Lou Lewis is a professional counsellor and the co-founder of Bottled Up with John. Lou's first husband had an addiction to alcohol for many years, from that experience and her counselling Lou has a deep understanding of the difficulties of living with problem drinkers.John and Lou are married and live in England. They founded Bottled Up in the hope that it would help change your life.The Bottled Up program is innovative and advocates that the partners of alcoholics can introduce changes to their lives, which will empower them and influence their drinkers to change. If you live with an alcoholic partner, or are looking for help to quit drinking, then Bottled Up is for you.For more help and advice visit www.bottled-up.comFor advertising and sponsorship opportunities email [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.