At Thirteen

Sara's guests  explore  parent-teen communication, both  in  public  speeches  about each other  at  their  special events  and how fostering healthy communication skills becomes increasingly important as teens journey from middle to high school.  

In this episode, host Sara Ivry explores the pressures on parents and pre-teens to navigate the celebrations that take place after the services and the speeches. You'll hear from party planners and DJs and a handful of insightful pre-teens who are seeking alternatives to the typical celebration.    "If you're the family that has over the top catered events. Have an over-the-top catered event. If you're a family that doesn't, then having one for the bar/bat mitzvah is twisted."  - Mark Oppenheimer

In this episode, host Sara Ivry examines the spiritual side of the b'nai mitzvah process. Listen in as Sara explores both the moments of blessing that occur in the ceremony and around it - and the unexpected ways that pre-teens are experiencing holiness in the rite of passage.    

In this episode, Sara explores the pressures pre-teens face to fit in - the social pressures and gender norms that impact today's pre-teens. We hear about the pressures on girls, boys, and the compelling story of a transgender pre-teen navigating b'nai mitzvah party culture.     "The parties are also a kind of performance. Pre-teens are pretending to be a little bit older and more mature than they are. The coat closet. Place for experimentation and risk taking. It is an exciting moment for kids to think about a more adult side of themselves. What is it about b'nai mitzvah? I can't be the only slutty girl in the coat closet." - Rachel Simmons "Most pre-teens want to belong - to have a group of friends to share good times with. Social status. Social ladder. Working to be at or near top. Some at twelve or thirteen have already given up and recognize that they'll be towards the bottom." - Andrew Smiler Featured voices: Rachel Simmons is the author of the bestsellers Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls and The Curse of the Good Girl: Raising Girls with Courage and Confidence and the co-founder of Girls Leadership. Andrew Smiler, PhD is a developmental psychologist and the author of the award-winning Dating and Sex: A Guide for the 21st Century Teen Boy. He is the president of the organization Male Survivor.   

Sara's guests reflect on self-esteem and performance anxiety and how gender codes influence ideas about public speaking, concerns about social media, and attitudes about perfection. More information: https://www.movingtraditions.org/being-incredibly-nervous/  

The folks from Moving Traditions bring you @13, a six-episode podcast series that is pitch-perfect for parents and pre-teens  going  through the sometimes confusing, likely emotional, and certainly triumphant process of planning and becoming  a Bat or Bar Mitzvah. In episode one, "At Thirteen" we hear from  rabbis, authors, psychologists, parents, and teens about the ancient roots and modern realities of this Jewish rite of passage. More information: https://www.movingtraditions.org/at-thirteen/ 

Getting ready for your child to have a bar or bat mitzvah? Join host Sara Ivry (Vox Tablet) and her guest lineup, including experts and parents, as they explore the meaning of the ceremony and celebration. Brought to you by Moving Traditions, a Jewish nonprofit that emboldens teens, and produced by Michele Siegel (Slate,The New York Times/WNYC), this podcast is essential listening for anyone guiding a soon-to-be teenager.