307- How To Gain Cooperation Without Resorting to Threats with Ralphie Jacobs

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we get to dive into boy culture and how it affects development with Dr. Niobe Way. For nearly 40 years, NYU developmental psychologist Dr. Niobe Way has been conducting groundbreaking research with teenagers, particularly boys and young men from diverse backgrounds. She's the author of more than 100 peer -reviewed research papers and is a go -to expert for media and the social science community on friendships, loneliness, teenagers, gender stereotypes, masculinity, and the roots of violence. Her work, which focuses on social and emotional development and how cultural ideologies shape child development, has broad appeal and resulted in everything from changes to APA policies and an Oscar -nominated film. Dr. Niobe Way is the author of two books, Deep Secrets and Rebels with a Cause. And this topic that we got to dive into about boy culture and what this means and what it looks like, it feels so dear to my heart as a mom raising a boy and also looking at what we can do to support the boys and men in our culture so that they're allowed to do things like feel sad, and that they aren't suppressing emotions that then come out in sometimes terrifying ways. I am so jazzed for y 'all to get to dive into this conversation. If this podcast is serving you, please take a moment to rate and review the podcast. It helps us serve more folks with free content so that they can build their toolbox right alongside us. Thank you. You are the bomb. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Dr. Niobe Way: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/niobe-way-75270534 Website: https://niobewaylab.squarespace.com/partners Order the books: Rebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves, and Our Culture, and Deep Secrets: Boys’ Friendships and the Crisis of Connection  Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Podcast episode with Dr. Nowicki about non verbal communication: How to Raise a Socially Successful Child Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and I'm so stoked about this episode. We get to chat about rethinking weapon play. This is a hot topic. It's one with a lot of opinions, and I really wanted to dive into the child development aspect of this. I got to hang out with Kisa Marx and Samuel Broaden to have this conversation. Kisa is an author, a child advocate, and a champion of early educators. With over two decades in the field, she spent 15 years running her self -affirming play in nature focused family home childcare in Oak Park, Illinois. Recently, she switched to a nonprofit model to offer high quality childcare to families who would otherwise be denied access. Kisa's advocacy, pedagogy, and ethos are anchored in three pillars: childhood is sacred, nature is restorative, and play is revolutionary. When she's not in the field with her crew or advocating with fellow childhood champions, Kisa can be found with her partner of 26 years tending to their garden of adult children, pets, and plants. Samuel is an early childhood advocate and author who believes in the power of childhood and showing children the power they have within themselves. He has worked in the early education field for 20 years, from a teacher to administration to quality coach to author and speaker. He believes in the importance of creating safe spaces for all children to discover who they are and be celebrated for that. He's the author of Gender Expression and Inclusivity in Early Childhood, A Teacher's Guide to Queering the Classroom, and their new book, Rethinking Weapon Play in Early Childhood, How to Encourage Imagination, Kindness, and Consent in Your Classroom, is out now from Kisa and Samuel. I'm super stoked for y 'all to get your hands on that bad boy. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Kisa: Instagram: @iam_still_learning Website: https://theplaylabnfpoakpark.org/ Order the book:Rethinking Weapon Play in Early Childhood: How to Encourage Imagination, Kindness, and Consent in Your Classroom Connect with Samuel: Instagram:@honoringchildhood Website: https://www.honoringchildhood.org/ Order the book:Rethinking Weapon Play in Early Childhood: How to Encourage Imagination, Kindness, and Consent in Your Classroom Podcast: Honoring Childhood  Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today I get to bring a special guest to you, someone I have followed online for a long time, and it was lovely to get to chat with. We get to hang out with Ralphie Jacobs from Simply on Purpose. Ralphie lives in Austin, Texas with her husband and their four daughters. As an early childhood education expert, Ralphie quickly learned that the best way to impact a child's life for good is to teach parents. She founded Simply on Purpose where she's built a community of over 650 ,000 families and writes about parenting, family culture, and living with purpose. She and I got to chat about how to gain cooperation without resorting to threats, something that can come so quickly, right, where we're like, oh, if you don't do this right now, then you're not going to be able to watch TV or you're not going to be able to have dessert. I think for so many of us, we grew up with that and so it's so ingrained and being able to pivot away from that can feel really challenging. I'm so glad I got to dive in with Ralphie and I'm super jazzed to share this episode with you. If you are finding value in this podcast, if it's helping you, if it's serving you, please take a moment to rate and review it. It helps other folks find our podcast so they can have access to free support on this journey as well. You're the bomb. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Ralphie: Instagram: @simplyonpurpose Website: https://simplyonpurpose.org/ Kids Lessons Subscription: Teach Me How Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and I got to hang out with an OT that I adore, Madeha Ayub. We got to dive into what the roots of behaviors can be and how our nervous system and our sensory systems can play a role. Madeha was born and raised in the heart of New York City. She's currently residing in Central New Jersey with her husband and two adventurous little humans, both under the age of four. She gets it, she's in it with us. She's been working as a pediatric OT for about eight years and the first five years primarily in school settings before switching to home health OT. She understands the need to identify and support sensory challenges in the school systems and home environment. She works primarily with children with autism and ADHD where the prevalence of sensory processing challenges is more than 90%. With the increase of sensory processing support from her clientele and having a child who has sensory sensitivities herself, Madeha has dedicated her social media to support parents, teachers, and other pediatric therapists to understanding and supporting sensory needs of children to optimize their performance in daily activities. I don't think we give enough credit to how much our sensory systems affect our ability to engage in life, whether it's, I don't have the same amount of patience for or something at certain times of day because my sensory systems are overwhelmed. Maybe there's been a lot of noise or you walk into space with a lot of clutter and your nervous system starts ticking and saying, woo, I need some support. And then all of a sudden you're yelling at your two -year -old when it really wasn't about the two -year -old. Madeha is also the author of sensory support children's books. Be on the lookout for her new book, Before The Brave Bite, launching at the end of this year. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Madeha: Instagram: @seedsforspecialneeds Website: https://seedsforspecialneeds.com/ Keep an eye out for Madeha’s new book, launching at the end of 2024: Before the Brave Bite Sign up to be notified when registration opens for Madeha's workshop at The 2025 Seed Teacher Summit! Post about Fairness in classrooms:  @hey.aimeej Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we get to dive into codependency and what it looks like to create healthy emotional boundaries with Alyssa Zander. Alyssa is a codependency and relationship coach supporting women in stepping into their authenticity and joy through shadow work and healing codependency in the mother wound. She is the creator of Codependency Alchemy, a podcast and membership that's designed to support you in feeling seen and supported while breaking through the generational cycles that are keeping you from standing in your power. Codependency is something that all of us wade in and out of, and for some of us, it's so hard to break that we feel like we're breaking when someone else is having a hard time, when you can feel that energy in the room and your nervous system is responding to it. It is palpable and being able to regulate your nervous system even when someone else is dysregulated is a challenge. I loved getting to dive into this and dance with Alyssa on some of this here and there. Don't miss the breakdown with Rach at the end where she shares a HILARIOUS story , and we chat about how different all this feels when parenting, than it does when in partnership only. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Alyssa Zander: Instagram: @alyssaaazander Website: https://alyssaaazander.substack.com Order the book: Healing the Mother Wound Podcast: Codependency Alchemy Podcast episode on tabling a conversation: What to do when you and your partner are not on the same page   Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Podcast episode with Dr. Morgan Cutlip: Mom Burnout and Alternatives to Typical Self Care with Dr. Morgan Cutlip Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Voices of Your Village, and today I got to hang out with Dr. Colleen Reichmann. We dove into eating disorders and how to prevent them, how to talk about food and bodies so that we can work to have this healthy relationship with our bodies and with food. It is such a nuanced conversation. I deeply appreciate that for the podcast medium that we can have a little bit of the nuanced conversation here. And I want to let folks know that I believe there isn't a one size fits all in this conversation. We talk about that in here. If you're not in a space right now to tune into a conversation about food and bodies, take pause, listen to that, and know that it's okay. It's okay to say like, yeah, I'm not there right now. Dr. Colleen Reichmann is a licensed clinical psychologist who practices in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. She's the founder of a group eating disorder therapy practice, Wildflower Therapy. She's recovered from anorexia and this experience sparked her passion for her work. She is now an eating disorder specialist and has worked at various treatment facilities, including University Medical Center of Princeton at Plainsboro Center for Eating Disorder Care and the Center for Eating Disorders at Shepherd Pratt. She is also a perinatal mental health specialist and loves working with women across the spectrum of motherhood, including those struggling with infertility and loss. She's an advocate for intersectional feminism, body liberation, and health at every size. Dr. Colleen Reichmann is the co -author of The Inside Scoop on Eating Disorder Recovery: Advice from Two Therapists Who Have Been There. Alright, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Dr. Colleen Reichmann: Instagram: @colleenreichmann Website: www.wildflowertherapyllc.com Order the book: The Inside Scoop on Eating Disorder Recovery: Advice from Two Therapists Who Have Been There Children’s Book Rec: Bodies Are Cool Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village and this episode I got to hang out with Sophie Brickman. She is a writer, reporter, and editor who has written for The New Yorker, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Elle, The Guardian, San Francisco Chronicle, and other outlets. Her work has also appeared in The Best Food Writing and The Best American Science Writing anthologies. Her first book, Baby Unplugged, about the intersection of technology and parenting received a starred Publisher's Weekly review and landed her a spot on Good Morning America. Plays Well with Others is her first novel. Y 'all, I'm here for this. I just like felt so seen in it, all about like parenting and our parenting journey. And it's nominally about applying a child to kindergarten in New York City, but it's so much more than that. It's really a story about becoming a parent, specifically for us in like this age where we are so inundated with information and decisions. And it so beautifully navigated this conversation with humor. It's called Plays Well With Others by Sophie Brickman. Due to travel schedules, there is no breakdown with Rach at the end of this episode. We'll see you back next week. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Sophie: Website: https://www.sophiebrickman.com/ Order the books: Plays Well with Others: A Novel;  Baby, Unplugged: One Mother's Search for Balance, Reason, and Sanity in the Digital Age Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we get to chat about thriving through grief. I got to hang out with Brandi Sellerz-Jackson. She's a storyteller, birth and postpartum doula, and the creator of Not So Private Parts. Initially created as a women's lifestyle blog, Not So Private Parts has evolved into a resource removing the shame and stigma surrounding women's issues. Sellerz -Jackson is the co -founder of Moms In Color, a black mom collective centered around celebrating diversity in the motherhood space. She is also the senior manager of social media for Ergobaby, a leading brand in baby wearing and attachment parenting. She has been featured in Oprah Daily, USA Today, Essence, and Mother, among other outlets. Sellerz-Jackson lives in Pasadena, California with her husband John and and their three boys, Jax, Jedi, and Jupiter. I loved chatting with Brandi because we got to talk about the real real of like, what is this really like to move through grief, and how grief shows up at different stages in parenthood. I think we often think of grief only in certain times, like if we lose someone we love, but grief happens often. When we grieve the life we had before when we had a second kiddo or third or when we grieve the life we had before kids or when we grieve the different parenting stages of longing for those early days or as kids transition into high school or middle school or go to college. Grief shows up all the time for us and learning to move through it and parent through it is a necessary skillset for being able to show up. All right folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Brandi: Instagram: @bstereo   Website: http://notsoprivateparts.life/ Moms in Color: https://themomsincolor.com/ Order the book: On Thriving: Harnessing Joy Through Life's Great Labors  Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village and today's a special episode because we're doing something a little bit different. I teamed up with my pal, Hunter Clarke-Fields, and we're doing a little podcast swap. So you get to hear an episode from her podcast, Mindful Parenting Podcast. I've been on it before. You may have tuned in then, but here's an episode from her podcast, Mindful Parenting Podcast, on what mindful parenting is. What makes mindful parenting different? How is it different from mindfulness for parents? In this very special reverse interview, Hunter answers questions posed by Lynn Weller, the Mindful Parenting Community Manager. You'll learn about why mindful parenting came about, Hunter's own struggles, and what's inside the groundbreaking course she developed. If you dig this episode, head on over and give her podcast a follow. You'll even be able to hear an episode from our podcast on her feed. Go check out which one I selected. Alright, folks, let's dive in. Connect with Hunter Clarke-Fields: Instagram: @mindfulmamamentor Website: www.mindfulmamamentor.com Order Hunter’s books: Raising Good Humans, Raising Good Humans Every Day Podcast: Mindful Parenting Podcast  Mindful Parenting Course Hunter’s previous podcast episodes on Voices of Your Village: How to Mindfully Raise Kind, Confident Kids Alyssa’s previous podcast episodes on Mindful Parenting Podcast: Navigate Tantrums, Meltdowns, and Defiance and Help Your Child Regulate Feelings  Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village and I'm so stoked about today's episode. I got to hang out again with my friend Eli Harwood of Attachment Nerd to chat about her latest book, Raising Securely Attached Kids. In this conversation today, we get to dive into how to raise confident kids. I have quoted her latest book, Raising Securely Attached Kids, in my upcoming book because it is just so good. And the way that she delivers information, it feels so accessible. Eli is a licensed therapist. She's the creator of Attachment Nerd. She's the author of the book Securely Attached and Raising Securely Attached Kids and has more than 17 years of clinical experience helping people process relational traumas and develop secure attachment relationships with their children and partners. I'm so jazzed to share this episode with you. I could hang out with Eli forever and I feel like I learn from her every single time I get to hang with her. Head out and snag her book right now, Raising Securely Attached Kids. All right, folks, let's dive in.  Connect with Eli: Instagram: @attachmentnerd Website: https://attachmentnerd.com/ Order the book: Raising Securely Attached Kids: Using Connection-Focused Parenting to Create Confidence, Empathy, and Resilience Podcast: https://attachmentnerd.com/podcast Connect with us: Instagram: @seed.and.sew  Podcast page: Voices of Your Village Seed and Sew's Regulation Quiz: Take the Quiz Order Tiny Humans, Big Emotions now!  Website: seedandsew.org Music by: Ruby Adams and Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices