The Episode About Balls | Unfiltered & Unhinged

Let’s be clear: the idea of a “perfect family” is outdated, unrealistic, and holding onto it often causes more harm than good. In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with family lawyer, author, and co-parenting advocate Gabriella Pomare to dismantle the myth that staying together is always best for the kids—and to redefine what healthy, modern families can actually look like. A partner at a leading law firm in Sydney, Gabriella brings over a decade of experience navigating complex family dynamics, from high-conflict separations to international custody cases. Because divorce isn’t the end of a family. It’s the restructuring of one. Gabriella brings both professional expertise and lived experience to the table, sharing how parents can move from conflict to collaboration—even when emotions are high, communication is broken, and resentment is lingering just beneath the surface. This conversation is honest, practical, and refreshingly real about what it actually takes to co-parent with intention instead of ego. In this episode, they cover: Why the “stay together for the kids” narrative is often more harmful than helpful The #1 skill that can make or break your co-parenting relationship: communication Gabriella’s 4-step communication framework How to set boundaries with a high-conflict or difficult ex (without losing your sanity) Tools like co-parenting apps that reduce drama and keep things child-focused How to handle holidays, schedules, and special occasions without turning them into battlegrounds Why kids don’t need the details—they need stability, safety, and reassurance Navigating dating, step-parent dynamics, and blended families  Because at the end of the day, it isn’t about being right. It’s about raising humans who feel safe, loved, and supported—no matter what their family structure looks like. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Gusto is online payroll and benefits software built for small businesses. It’s all-in-one, remote-friendly, and incredibly easy to use—so you can pay, hire, onboard, and support your team from anywhere! Try Gusto today at gusto.com/TIWW, and get three months free when you run your first payroll. Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/TIWW for free shipping and 365-day returns! Connect with Gabriella: Website: https://thecollaborativeco-parent.com.au  Book:https://www.amazon.com/Collaborative-Parent-Co-Parenting-dignified-collaborative/dp/1636987036/  IG: https://www.instagram.com/collaborativecoparent/ Related Podcast Episodes: 047 / Mindset, Resilience & Divorce with Susan Tripi 198 / Repairing Damaged Relationships with Carlee Myers 204 / How To Let Go Of Your Ex with Dr. Cortney Warren Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this unfiltered and unhinged solo episode, Nicole Kalil gets brutally honest about something every high-achieving woman hates to admit: she’s been dropping balls. A lot of them. From missed appointments to forgotten commitments, Nicole pulls back the curtain on what happens when even the most organized, detail-loving, color-coded-calendar kind of woman hits a breaking point. And instead of spiraling into shame (okay, maybe a little), she revisits a powerful mindset shift that changes everything. Enter: glass balls vs. rubber balls. Because not everything that gets dropped is a disaster — and treating it like one is exactly what’s burning women out. This episode is a reality check and a permission slip: Not all mistakes are catastrophic Not everything deserves your guilt And no, you’re not “losing it”… you’re human Nicole breaks down how to: Identify what actually matters (your glass balls) Stop overreacting to the things that don’t (your rubber balls) Give yourself grace without lowering your standards Protect your energy, your priorities, and your sanity Because the goal isn’t to juggle everything perfectly — it’s to know what’s worth catching. And if a few balls bounce? Let them. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Gusto is online payroll and benefits software built for small businesses. It’s all-in-one, remote-friendly, and incredibly easy to use—so you can pay, hire, onboard, and support your team from anywhere! Try Gusto today at gusto.com/TIWW, and get three months free when you run your first payroll. Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/TIWW for free shipping and 365-day returns! Connect with Nicole: Subscribe to Nicole’s Substack: https://nicolekalil.substack.com/  Join the Inner Circle: https://nicolekalil.myflodesk.com/newsletter  Related Podcast Episode: Women Are Tired — Stop Pointing It Out | Unfiltered & Unhinged Restless Life Syndrome (Why I Want 14 Different Lives) | Unfiltered & Unhinged Yell for Help | Unfiltered & Unhinged Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s get one thing straight: this is not a fan girl episode. It’s a masterclass in women’s economic power, using one of the most undeniable case studies of our time — Taylor Swift. In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with economist and researcher Misty Heggeness, author of Swiftynomics, to break down what happens when women stop playing small and start reshaping entire industries. Because whether people like Taylor Swift or not? Irrelevant. What she’s done for ownership, influence, and economic impact? Undeniable. This conversation dives into the data behind the headlines — exposing how women have always been driving the economy… just without the credit. In this episode, they explore: What “Swiftynomics” actually means (and why it’s bigger than Taylor Swift) Why traditional economic metrics undervalue women (and always have) How women drive over 80% of consumer spending — and what that means for power The rise of female-led content, companies, and cultural influence Why backlash against powerful women is predictable… and irrelevant The economic shift happening when women support women — and stop supporting what doesn’t support them Why equity in the workplace and at home benefits everyone (yes, even men) This isn’t about celebrity. It’s about who holds power, who gets recognized for it, and who’s done waiting for permission. This episode reframes Taylor Swift as more than a pop icon — she’s proof of what happens when women own their work, their voice, and their value, and in doing so, redefine the entire economic landscape. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Gusto is online payroll and benefits software built for small businesses. It’s all-in-one, remote-friendly, and incredibly easy to use—so you can pay, hire, onboard, and support your team from anywhere! Try Gusto today at gusto.com/TIWW, and get three months free when you run your first payroll. Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/TIWW for free shipping and 365-day returns! Connect with Misty: Website: https://www.mistyheggeness.com/  Book: https://www.instagram.com/swiftynomics/  Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/swiftynomics.bsky.social  X: https://bsky.app/profile/swiftynomics.bsky.social  Related Podcast Episodes: Holding It Together: Women As America's Safety Net with Jessica Calarco | 215 How To Cultivate Audacity with Anne Marie Anderson | 276 Joan Lunden on Reinvention, Leadership & Life Beyond the Script | 392 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Romantic relationships are not supposed to stay frozen in the honeymoon phase forever. In this episode, Nicole Kalil sits down with attachment theory expert Thais Gibson—bestselling author, PhD, and founder of The Personal Development School—to break down the six stages of relationships, why the power struggle stage is where so many couples get stuck, and what it really takes to build healthy, lasting love. Because, contrary to everything rom-coms, bad advice, and old conditioning taught women, a strong relationship is not about never changing. It is about learning how to grow, communicate, repair, and keep choosing each other when life gets messy, inconvenient, and very unsexy. In this episode, Nicole and Thais discuss: The 6 stages of relationships, from dating to everlasting love Why the power struggle stage is normal, not proof something is broken Why vulnerability is the price of deeper connection The communication mistake couples make on repeat Why women often overfocus on being chosen instead of doing the choosing Why people date potential and how that blows up later What it takes to move from stability into devotion and lasting partnership This conversation gets into the real stuff: dating red flags, codependency, conflict resolution, self-abandonment, subconscious patterns, and the truth about what it takes to create a healthy relationship that evolves with you instead of trapping you. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Gusto is online payroll and benefits software built for small businesses. It’s all-in-one, remote-friendly, and incredibly easy to use—so you can pay, hire, onboard, and support your team from anywhere! Try Gusto today at gusto.com/TIWW, and get three months free when you run your first payroll. Connect with Thais: Website: personaldevelopmentschool.com  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchoolG:  IG: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/?hl=en  Related Podcast Episodes: All The Ways We Get In Our Own Way with Thais Gibson | 235 Healing Relationships: The 4 Essential Pillars for Lasting Love with Dr. Rachel Glik | 283 163 / Do You Believe in Love? with Arielle Ford Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Somewhere along the way, women were sold a lie: competition is the price of ambition. Be faster. Be louder. Be better. And if someone else wins? You must lose. In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with Ruchika T. Malhotra—founder and CEO of Candour, a global inclusion strategy firm, and author of Uncompete: Rejecting Competition to Unlock Success—to dismantle the zero-sum mindset and replace it with something far more powerful: collaboration, abundance, and shared success. Ruchika, a former business journalist and contributor to Harvard Business Review (including co-author of one of HBR’s most-read articles, Stop Telling Women They Have Impostor Syndrome), brings research, global perspective, and real-world strategy to challenge how we think about workplace competition, women in leadership, and ambition. Together, they unpack: Why competition in real life rewards conformity—not excellence The difference between comparison (human) and competition (optional) How social media fuels constant, low-grade competitive anxiety What “uncompeting” looks like in promotions, leadership, and career growth How to turn envy into data instead of self-destruction Why competing with other women isn’t strategy—it’s conditioning Bottom line: Uncompeting isn’t about lowering ambition. It’s about rejecting scarcity, defining success on your own terms, and building long-game leadership rooted in integrity—not insecurity. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Connect with Ruchika: Website: https://www.ruchika.co/ Book: www.uncompetebook.com LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruchikatm IG: https://www.instagram.com/rtulshyan/ Related Podcast Episodes 137 / Ampliship (Mean Girls Part 2) with Caroline Adams Miller 206 / A Better Way to Define Success with Stella Grizont How To Get What You Want with Jenny Wood | 293 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if meditation isn’t about sitting still, clearing your mind, or becoming some perfectly calm, enlightened human? What if it’s simply about presence? In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with entrepreneur, TEDx speaker, and founder of the globally consumed meditation podcast A Zen Mind, Jo Rose, to talk about meditation for real life, nervous system regulation, and how cultivating presence can transform the way we work, lead, and live. In this conversation, we explore: The biggest myths about meditation and why so many people think they “can’t meditate” Why meditation isn’t about silencing your mind  How presence and mindfulness can happen during conversations, movement, or everyday tasks The connection between nervous system regulation and feeling calm, open, and grounded Why trying to control outcomes often blocks creativity and intuition The difference between forcing results vs. allowing flow states How to discover routines that support your mental health and well-being (and why copying someone else’s routine rarely works) The power of devotion over discipline when building meditation and mindfulness practices Because meditation isn’t about perfection. It’s about noticing when your mind wanders… and bringing it back. Over and over again. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Listen to A Zen Mind Podcast & Connect With Jo Rose: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/69Jm0pfRlpnaBDaioynNaX?si=r9BQATHYRei2Hm0tBQ2O8w&nd=1&dlsi=dcf04fdb2d8b4ab6 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-zen-mind-guided-meditations/id1599159160 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@azenmind IG: https://www.instagram.com/a.zen.mind Website: https://azenmindglobal.com/  Related Podcast Episodes: Stop Saying “I’m Fine”: Nervous System Regulation for High-Achieving Women with Michelle Grosser | 372 How To Listen When Your Parts Speak (IFS Therapy + Ancestral Wisdom) with Tamala Floyd | 376 How Our Dysregulated Nervous Systems Are Impacting Us with Victoria Albina | 244 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Some phrases women hear on repeat really need to be retired — permanently. In this unfiltered & unhinged short episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil revisits her earlier rant “Stop Saying That” (Episode 216) and adds another phrase to the list: “You look tired.” Nicole explains why this comment — even when it’s meant with good intentions — isn’t helpful. If someone looks exhausted, chances are they already know. Between work, family, responsibilities, and the never-ending mental load women carry, it’s no surprise so many are running on fumes. Instead of pointing it out, Nicole suggests a better approach: ask how someone is doing, offer support, or bring coffee. Because there’s a big difference between making an observation and showing actual care. And yes, women are tired — but we keep showing up anyway. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Connect with Nicole: Subscribe to Nicole’s Substack: https://nicolekalil.substack.com/  Join the Inner Circle: https://nicolekalil.myflodesk.com/newsletter  Related Podcast Episodes: Stop Saying That! (Like Right F*****g Now) | 216 Restless Life Syndrome (Why I Want 14 Different Lives) | Unfiltered & Unhinged Yell for Help | Unfiltered & Unhinged Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For years, women have been told to just focus harder, get organized, use the planner, and stick to the system. But when those systems don’t work, the assumption is that we’re the problem. In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with ADHD counselor, author, and creator of the ADHD Regulation Method, Jenna Free, to challenge the idea that there’s a “right” way for our brains to function. Jenna offers a different perspective: ADHD isn’t a defect — it’s a brain difference. And many of the struggles people associate with ADHD may actually come from something else entirely — chronic nervous system dysregulation and living in constant fight-or-flight mode. In this conversation, Jenna breaks down why so many traditional productivity tools fail people with ADHD, how dysregulation fuels overwhelm and procrastination, and what it actually takes to create balance, focus, and sustainable productivity. This conversation isn’t just for people with ADHD. It’s for anyone who has ever felt overwhelmed, stuck, behind, or convinced that they just need to try harder. In this episode, we explore: Why ADHD is considered a brain difference, not a disorder or failure How chronic fight-or-flight dysregulation amplifies ADHD symptoms Why rushing is one of the biggest signals of nervous system dysregulation The difference between living in potential vs. reality (and why it matters) The role of curiosity — instead of guilt and shame — in changing patterns Why traditional productivity advice often backfires for ADHD brains When medication can be helpful — and why it’s not a moral decision If you’ve ever felt like your brain just doesn’t cooperate with the way the world expects you to work… this conversation might just change how you see yourself. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Connect with Jenna: Website: https://www.adhdwithjennafree.com/ Book: https://www.amazon.com/Simple-Guide-ADHD-Regulation-Enjoying/dp/1400254698  IG: www.instagram.com/adhdwithjennafree TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@adhdwithjennafree Related Podcast Episodes: Stop Saying “I’m Fine”: Nervous System Regulation for High-Achieving Women with Michelle Grosser | 372 How To Listen When Your Parts Speak (IFS Therapy + Ancestral Wisdom) with Tamala Floyd | 376 How Our Dysregulated Nervous Systems Are Impacting Us with Victoria Albina | 244 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

AI is officially in the workplace, on the group chat, and probably drafting someone’s “thought leadership” while they’re still in the shower. In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil goes toe-to-toe with the thing that’s equal parts fascinating and mildly rage-inducing: AI and the future of work. Enter Katie Fortunato, Co-Founder and EVP of Platform Innovation & Strategy at Hire Innovations, a global leader in human-centered AI talent technology. Together, they unpack how to use AI as a tool (not a personality), how to avoid “automation without accountability,” and why the future belongs to humans who can still think, judge, and lead—aka the “skills” no bot can fake convincingly for long. In this episode, they get into: Why AI feels like cheating… and when it actually is The difference between using AI for productivity vs. outsourcing your identity “Brand choices” (aka: how to lose audience trust in one easy AI avatar) How to start using AI if it’s intimidating: repeat-task lists, tiny experiments, and momentum Picking AI tools without spiraling: ChatGPT, Gemini, Claude—and why it’s like joining a gym AI in hiring: what “responsible AI” actually looks like in talent tech The uncomfortable truth: there is no 100% guarantee—so you need guardrails Vendor trust, data privacy, compliance, and why downloading random tools at work is chaos behavior Why protecting critical thinking is urgent—especially for kids (and honestly, adults too) The core takeaway: let AI handle repetitive work so humans can double down on context, curiosity, judgment, and care Wrap-up (because the point is the point): Nicole and Katie land on a clear line in the sand—AI can boost productivity, but it shouldn’t replace human thinking, discernment, or authenticity. The future of work won’t just be shaped by what AI can do; it’ll be shaped by what people choose to protect while using it. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Connect with Katie: LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katieclarkfortunato/      https://www.linkedin.com/company/talivitynetwork/      https://www.linkedin.com/company/recruitics/ Jobstream (INVITE CODE FOR CREATORS & COMMUNITIES: FOUNDER) : https://bit.ly/48fneLK Related Podcast Episodes: Unmasking AI with Dr. Joy Buolamwini | 259 Digital Decluttering: How to Make Tech Your Assistant, Not Your Adversary with Amanda Jefferson | 312 023 / Branding YOU With Terri Lomax Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s talk about the glow-up no one told you about: the one where you hit midlife and suddenly cannot be bothered with other people’s bullshit anymore. Because somewhere between perimenopause, professional burnout, emotional labor overload, and decades of people-pleasing, something shifts. You stop cushioning your words. You stop managing everyone else’s feelings like it’s your unpaid side hustle. And when someone asks, “Are you okay?” the answer is, “Better than ever. I just ran out of estrogen—and tolerance.” In this episode, Nicole sits down with licensed clinical therapist Ellen Scherr to unpack the neuroscience behind what she calls “aging out of f*cks.” Spoiler alert: this isn’t bitterness. It’s biology. As estrogen declines in midlife, it impacts multiple neurochemical systems in the brain—systems tied to anxiety, people-pleasing, anger regulation, and emotional buffering. The “popular girl at the party” (aka estrogen) leaves… and suddenly the whole dynamic changes. What once felt like obligation starts to feel optional. What once felt terrifying starts to feel negotiable. And what once felt like “I should” becomes “Do I even want to?” They dive into: The neuroscience of perimenopause and menopause—and how hormonal changes impact confidence, risk-taking, and people-pleasing Why women’s confidence actually increases with age (and can surpass men’s in their 60s) The lifelong cost of emotional labor—and why it starts to break down in midlife How negativity bias keeps women stuck in fear (and how to reframe it) The difference between legitimate feedback and social punishment Why so many women make bold career, relationship, and life changes in their 40s, 50s, and beyond Whether it’s possible to “speed up” the process of caring less in your 20s and 30s This isn’t about blowing up your life. It’s about understanding the neuroscience of midlife, reclaiming your authenticity, setting boundaries, and rewiring old people-pleasing patterns. Aging out of f*cks isn’t decline—it’s development. It’s honesty over harmony. And if you’re suddenly “too much”? Good. You’re not here to be palatable. You’re here to be you. Thank you to our sponsors! Shopify has everything all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at shopify.com/tiww  Connect with Ellen: Website: www.lifebranches.com Substack: https://substack.com/search/blog.lifebranches.com?utm_source=global-search  Oprah Daily: https://substack.com/search/blog.lifebranches.com?utm_source=global-search  Related Podcast Episodes: The Stress Paradox: Why We Need Stress (and How to Make It Work for Us) with Dr. Sharon Horesh Bergquist | 294 How To Listen When Your Parts Speak (IFS Therapy + Ancestral Wisdom) with Tamala Floyd | 376 Am I Being a B**ch? (…or Just Finally in My Power) with Megan Walrod | 349 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices