269. Mark Manson: On Killing Your Dream, "The Subtle Art," Anxiety & Depression

The quickest way to kill a dream is to achieve it. That's how Mark Manson opened our conversation, and it hit me harder than I expected. We get into altitude sickness, the arrival fallacy, and why the one variable that predicts how long you live is the one I almost never hear talked about in the wellness world. CLICK HERE TO BECOME GARY’S VIP!: ⁠https://bit.ly/4ai0Xwg⁠ Get all Mark Manson’s books here: ⁠https://bit.ly/42sbr9q⁠   Listen to Mark Manson on all your favorite platforms! YouTube: ⁠https://bit.ly/4dBTDin⁠  Spotify: ⁠https://bit.ly/4tuGdJN⁠   Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://bit.ly/3PxcJgs⁠   Connect with Mark Manson Website: ⁠https://bit.ly/48ThxTZ⁠    YouTube: ⁠https://bit.ly/4dBTDin⁠   Instagram: ⁠https://bit.ly/4dkm5UK⁠   Facebook: ⁠https://bit.ly/4eFY8to⁠   TikTok: ⁠https://bit.ly/4ttiE46⁠   X: ⁠https://bit.ly/4dkmmHg⁠   LinkedIn: ⁠https://bit.ly/48TdZkw⁠   Thank you to our partners A-GAME: “ULTIMATE15” FOR 15% OFF: ⁠http://bit.ly/4kek1ij⁠   AION: “ULTIMATE10” FOR 10% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/4h6KHAD⁠  AIRES: "ULTIMATE20 " FOR 20% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/4a3Duze⁠  BAJA GOLD: "ULTIMATE10" FOR 10% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/3WSBqUa⁠  BODYHEALTH: “ULTIMATE20” FOR 20% OFF: ⁠http://bit.ly/4e5IjsV⁠  COLD LIFE: THE ULTIMATE HUMAN PLUNGE: ⁠https://bit.ly/4eULUKp⁠  CYMBIOTIKA: "ULTIMATE10" FOR 10% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/4tjyluP⁠  GENETIC METHYLATION TEST (UK ONLY): ⁠https://bit.ly/48QJJrk⁠  GENETIC TEST (USA ONLY): ⁠⁠https://bit.ly/3Yg1Uk9⁠  GOPUFF: GET YOUR FAVORITE SNACK!: ⁠https://bit.ly/4obIFDC⁠  H2TAB: “ULTIMATE10” FOR 10% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/4hMNdgg⁠  HEALF: 10% OFF YOUR ORDER: ⁠https://bit.ly/41HJg6S⁠  PEPTUAL: “TUH10” FOR 10% OFF: ⁠https://bit.ly/4mKxgcn⁠  SNOOZE: LET’S GET TO SLEEP!: ⁠https://bit.ly/4pt1T6V⁠  WHOOP: JOIN & GET 1 FREE MONTH!: ⁠https://bit.ly/3VQ0nzW⁠  Watch  the “Ultimate Human Podcast” every Tuesday & Thursday at 9AM EST: YouTube: ⁠https://bit.ly/3RPQYX8⁠ Podcasts: ⁠https://bit.ly/3RQftU0⁠ Connect with Gary Brecka Instagram: ⁠https://bit.ly/3RPpnFs⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://bit.ly/4coJ8fo⁠ X: ⁠https://bit.ly/3Opc8tf⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://bit.ly/464VA1H⁠ LinkedIn: ⁠https://bit.ly/4hH7Ri2⁠ Website: ⁠https://bit.ly/4eLDbdU⁠ Merch: ⁠https://bit.ly/4aBpOM1⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://bit.ly/47ejrws⁠ Ask Gary: ⁠https://bit.ly/3PEAJuG⁠ Timestamps 00:00 - Introduction 01:03 - Mark Manson on the show 02:25 - Outsider years and meeting his wife in Sao Paulo 04:35 - The arrival fallacy and altitude sickness 07:40 - Why nobody wants to hear a successful person complain 09:38 - Gary's bankruptcy, divorce, and the day he took radical responsibility 13:18 - Fault versus responsibility (the part most people get wrong) 15:41 - Cymbiotika NAD ad read 16:45 - Tony Robbins, the five-second pause, and self-awareness 18:40 - What ego actually is (Freud's framework) 21:53 - Accurate ego versus delusional ego 22:33 - Marriage, ecosystems, and signing up for everything 24:25 - How to start the journey of introspection 26:51 - Try on beliefs like jeans 29:01 - The dad-bod study and the 80/90% gender split 31:20 - Why people refuse to accept other perspectives 34:05 - Harvard longevity, blue zones, and the relationship variable 38:31 - Why biohackers skip the relationship hack 39:52 - Relationship quality as a set of teachable skills 47:50 - Anxiety as a crisis of hope 54:16 - Cold Life filtered showerhead ad read 55:01 - Young entrepreneurs and the belief problem 58:39 - Why Gary built the Ultimate Human platform with no expectations 01:01:37 - Caregiver syndrome and autoimmune disease in women 01:07:18 - Finding versus cultivating purpose 01:14:18 - The genetic baseline of happiness 01:19:02 - John Gottman on recurring fights and what every happy couple has 01:21:53 - Where to find Mark 01:22:20 - What does it mean to you to be an Ultimate Human? Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not provide medical advice. It is not intended for diagnosing or treating any health condition. Always consult a licensed healthcare professional before making health or wellness decisions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices