r/RoastMe; What Was the Comment that Destroyed You?

A new employee asked what food he could eat in the fridge, but when he was told he could eat none of it and was supposed to bring his own lunch, he just couldn’t comprehend. He was fired a month later for stealing chloroform.

A nurse tells about a girl who had a pin in her mouth, and then accidentally sucked it in where it got temporarily lodged in her throat, dislodged, then lodged in her bronchial, requiring major surgery. Another kid was running with a toothbrush in his mouth, ran into something, and almost punctured an artery. I also read comments that might make you tear up or cry.

“Well, everything is fine with you except for that haircut.” One doctor had a brain fart and couldn’t think of the right word when asking about the penile discharge of one of his patients, so he went with the word “Dong.” I read a bunch more funny comments.

“As a kind of fat guy with glasses, probably the most eviscerated comment I got was, ‘looks like Harry Potter let himself go.’” A comment under this says “I remember someone getting told ‘You look like your patronus is cake.’”

After hammering in his tent pegs, a kid, for no apparent reason, decided to chuck his hammer at a tent. There was a girl inside it who was bashed in the face, breaking multiple teeth on which she choked to death moments later. The kid was arrested and charged with involuntary manslaughter. I also share some life hacks 4:27.

While at his aunt’s funeral, OP overhears some Karens sitting close to him bashing the funeral venue, complaining, and calling it cheap. He then gets up, giving a eulogy about how she was like a mother to him and the whole time witnessing the look of surprise on their faces. Another story is told about a Karen that treats a restaurant employee terribly, but finds something out at the end, making her face go pale. A third story tells of a homophobic Karen who receives some petty vengeance over a parking debacle.

OP in the first story was treated differently by their teacher because they had some disabilities. Then she made the mistake of calling OP’s mother to complain about them. In the second story OP is a hard worker who just wanted to become efficient at their job, but the union workers didn’t like that and kept making their life at work harder for it. So OP came up with an idea on their last day at work.

While working at a law firm, OP receives an unnecessary request from one of the managers, Lady Kathryn. For no apparent reason, this manager wants to make her life and the lives of all the other admins hell, but her reign can’t last forever.

A company’s branch in Salt Lake City has great company culture and gives a lot of leeway to people when they need time off from work. A man higher up in the company takes note and decides to take it upon himself to change this, but the people he’s over do not accept what he’s doing.

OP, a Muslim with a semi conservative family, had a shotgun wedding after she got pregnant with another Muslim’s son. Over the years, the husband has made things difficult by not compromising and telling OP she’s lucky he was willing to save her reputation by marrying her. What should she do?