Tortuga 1667

We bought a zoo! The gang plays Ark Nova, a game about building and managing competing zoos. Taylor talks about growing up as a "bug kid" and pitches yet another Wingspan spinoff game. Elena talks about raising tadpoles and petting wallabies. 

Avast ye scallywags! The gang plays Tortuga 1667, a social deduction game about pirates and treasure. Graham goes on a heavily redacted tangent about shifts in the prestige television streaming space. Elena does her best impersonation of a human jukebox. Alex totally blacks out all of rules and setup, likely due to high levels of neuromicroplasticity. Taylor talks about cultivating and harvesting mass over the holidays, and Emma recalls her meatball burps.

I hate Mondays. The gang plays Patchwork, a tile placement game about quilt patches and buttons. Taylor talks about tetrominoes and Garfield. Elena talks about Coraline and Monster House.

Aloha! The gang plays Spirit Island, a cooperative settler-destruction strategy game. Elena goes off about congestion pricing in NYC. Alex talks about his tragic backstory as a child chess prodigy. Taylor suggests replacing tech interviews with seeing how well interns grok board game rules.

If it walks like a duck and it talks like a duck, it is probably from Quedlinburg. The gang plays The Quacks of Quedlinburg, a bag-builder, push-your-luck game about brewing potent potions. Elena talks about putting STEM boyfriends on PIPs. Taylor sounds super congested after a recent skirmish with COVID-19 and talks about shit about the Grammys. Lauren makes her podcast debut and talks about her struggles with the American healthcare system.

Welcome to the Taylor Show! The gang plays Scythe: Automa, an area control game that pits a single player against what could generously be called an AI. Taylor talks about the origins of the famed Cheese Phase. Taylor explains the rules using a clumsy Quidditch metaphor, which causes Taylor to lose his train of thought. Taylor talks about how much he likes being alone. Taylor has an existential crisis and Taylor struggles to maintain a consistent energy level. Taylor questions his life choices that led him to this point.

Fire Sale II: Electric Boogaloo! The gang rapid reviews another smörgåsbord of games pulled from Taylor's Shelf of Shame. Alex and Elena pull a Freaky Friday. Taylor drinks too much dragon brandy and struggles with basic math. Sam, Noah, and (another) Taylor all make their Shelf Space debut.

This podcast will self-destruct in 1 hour, 3 minutes, and 54 seconds. The gang plays Mind MGMT, an asymmetric hidden movement game based on a series of graphic novels with the same name. Emma and Elena discuss piercings, and Graham and Taylor share their childhood foot traumas [TRIGGER WARNING: FOOT GORE]. Alex reminisces about his time as a terminally online middle schooler.Taylor hides some subliminal messaging in the final edit.

XOXO. This Valentine's Day Taylor and Elena play Fog of Love, an appropriately themed two-player card game. Taylor talks shit about board game cafes and Elena lives out her fantasy of being some sort of nurse/ogre hybrid.

Time is a flat circle. The gang plays 7 Wonders - a game of wood, ore, clay brick, stone, glass, papyrus, and textiles - before ordering 70 chicken nuggets from [REDACTED]. Emma talks about getting hacked and Patrick brags about his password manager. Alex pitches Tic-tac-toe and Graham contemplates slurping a [REDACTED]. Taylor and Elena talk shit about all their teacher friends.