Understanding the Lies that Hold You Back with Gary Thomas | Episode 276

Each year around Christmas, we like to do a special episode where we not only celebrate the holiday, but also look back on the last year and all that God has been teaching us. The days and months can often speed by us, and that’s why it’s so nice to take a moment to pause and reflect.We are reviewing the entire year before moving into 2026, including why Mark has been on the podcast more (and why he’ll be returning more next year!), what it was like to start the year off with our Life 2.0 Foundation work in Africa, and more.In this episode, you’ll hear:What we’ve learned in 2025The role that waiting plays in the context of ChristmasSome exciting things that are coming in the new yearAnd more!From our family to yours, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/merry-christmas-278Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

We love Christmas! It’s our (and especially Mark’s) favorite time of year. Besides the decorations, presents, cheer, and time with family, Christmas marks a very special event. It’s when God sent His son to earth, which was the greatest expression of His love for us.In our own personal story of redeeming our marriage together, one of the biggest lessons we learned was what love really looks like. It’s not that we were unloving in the 1.0 version of us; it’s just that we didn’t understand how to love each other and receive love well.All of us can benefit from maturing our understanding of love. Instead of falling into the trap of giving and receiving love that’s transactional, we need to practice the kind of love that Jesus showed us.In this episode, you’ll hear:The characteristics of real loveHow Jesus displayed love for usWays we can express sacrificial love for one anotherAnd more!We hope this conversation helps you understand the true love that Jesus exemplified when He laid down His life for us!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/love-like-jesus-277Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

Are you feeling restless today? Dissatisfied? Sometimes, when we’re feeling these unpleasant emotions, we can struggle to identify their source.What you might not realize is that many of those feelings can come from the false beliefs we hold about the world, ourselves, and those around us. Many of us are believing lies that rob us of contentment and cripple our intimacy with God.For Mark and I, becoming “lie detectors” in our own lives has been a big part of our healing process—both as individuals and as a married couple. That’s why I’m so glad my guest for this conversation is a champion of truth, and he’s here to help us lean away from lies and toward what’s real.Gary Thomas says that the key to the truly abundant new life God promises starts with unlearning falsehoods we may not even realize we believe. Gary is a bestselling author and international speaker whose ministry seeks to bring people closer to Christ and to others.In this episode, you’ll hear:God’s true purpose for marriageSome of the lies that rob us of joyThe key to having a deep relationship with God and othersAnd more!It was a pleasure to have Gary on the show, as his writing has had such a deep impact on our lives and marriage.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/gary-thomas-276Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

This week’s episode will look a little bit different, as we are resharing one of our top five episodes of all time with you!With the holiday season beginning, there will be countless opportunities for relationships to be strained. You’ll encounter many situations where you will have to interact with people that you would rather avoid.We were designed to be in relationships. However, even though connecting with others is part of our DNA, navigating relationships can also be one of the most challenging parts of life. Joining me to help us explore this topic is PeggySue Wells.PeggySue is an author, speaker, and coach. She is the best-selling author of 45 books. On top of that, she’s a single mom of 7 kids. PeggySue has a passion for helping people improve their relationships.We first released this conversation four years ago, and it’s still one of our favorite episodes. The information shared continues to be a great resource for all of us as we head into the holidays and are knee-deep in the sometimes messy but always meaningful work of family relationships.In this episode, you’ll hear:The five R’s that destroy relationshipsHow to get out of common unhealthy cyclesThe benefits God has for us in relationshipsAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/peggysue-wells-275Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

Can you believe that the holidays are just around the corner? We recently got our first snow in Illinois, and it’s got us in the holiday spirit!Along with the merriment and celebrations of this season come various expectations, obligations, and family gatherings to attend. A few years ago, we started a tradition in our family of giving our children the gift of freedom when it comes to holiday events. While this may be unheard of in some families, this decision has brought our family much relief from the pressures that often come with the holidays. It gives our adult children space to forge their own traditions with their families, and it gives us freedom, too.This year, we’re traveling to Australia to spend Christmas with our son—something we couldn’t do if we’d insisted that all our kids and their families spend the holidays with us locally. If you’re curious about what it could look like to give the gift of freedom to your own family this holiday season, listen in to hear our best advice.In this episode, you’ll hear:How to let go of rigid schedulesThe greatest gift you can give to your adult childrenWhy setting realistic expectations is so importantAnd more!We hope this conversation inspires you to prepare well for the holiday season!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/preparing-for-holidays-274Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

Every one of us knows what it’s like to hold prayers that haven’t been answered. That season of waiting can feel like one of the toughest battles of all. I experienced this myself during my marriage crisis, and I can’t tell you the number of times I cried out to the Lord to answer my prayer.My guest knows what it’s like to live with an unanswered prayer. She searched for over 10 years for her biological father, all the while fervently praying that God would lead her to him.Dr. Deanna Shrodes is an ordained minister, an author, speaker, and spiritual life strategist. She has been featured in various media outlets, including CBS News and People Magazine. Her latest book is Uncommon Answers: Partnering with the Holy Spirit to Receive Extraordinarily More, and in it she offers fresh hope and faith for those weary for a breakthrough.In this episode, you’ll hear:An incredible story of a long-awaited prayerHow to persevere in prayerThe importance of continuing to pray even when you don’t receive an answerAnd more!I was so encouraged by Deanna’s incredible story of answered prayer and her insights on what to do in those long seasons of waiting.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/deanna-shrodes-273Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

When we stand at the altar and say “I do,” our eyes are filled with stars. We’re certain we have found happily ever after.After the wedding day, we find out that this marriage stuff is way more complicated than we initially thought. Once we are living out our day-to-day routine with another person, we find that challenges abound.We talk about marriage a lot on this podcast, but today, we are going to get a little more specific. We’re diving deep into how marriage is experienced by men. Our guest for this conversation is Roy Wooten.Roy is the executive director of The Crucible Project, a nonprofit men’s ministry. He has served as a pastor, ministry executive, coach, and counselor. Roy and his wife have co-authored The Secret to Lifetime Love.In this episode, you’ll hear:Common tendencies men have within marriageLies satan often uses against menThe importance of learning how to engage our emotions in a healthy mannerAnd more!We deeply enjoyed Roy’s fresh insight on how men engage in marriage.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/roy-wooten-272Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

Have you heard about the dog and cat marriage? It might sound like a crazy concept, but it’s one that has helped us not only understand each other, but also help other couples understand how attachment styles are impacting their marriage.We created this idea of “dogs” and “cats” to explain the different attachment styles, and we’ve discovered that applying this concept is one of the top ways we see marriages change and heal in our coaching sessions.Regardless of whether you are more of a “cat” or a “dog”, everyone can benefit from this helpful analogy to understand how your attachment style plays out in your relationships.In this episode, you’ll hear:What it means to be a “dog” or a “cat” in your marriageSome tools to help you understand your attachment styleWays we can move toward a secure attachment styleAnd more!We hope this conversation helps you begin to better understand your attachment style!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/dog-cat-marriage-271Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

One of the most beautiful gifts we can give to others is our presence in their pain. Knowing you are not alone when you are walking through something hard is so important, especially when it involves the death of a spouse.When you lose your teammate in life, it’s disorienting, overwhelming, and traumatic. Here to help us understand the difficult circumstances that arise from the passing of a spouse is my guest, Amy Graves Boyd.Amy’s life took an unexpected turn in 2020 when she faced the loss of her first husband, Bryan. He passed away just three months after being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. This was not the way life was supposed to go. During and after this dark season, Amy had to navigate not only her own pain, but also the pain of their children who lost their father at such a tender time.As her family walked through the valley of the shadow of death, Amy experienced God’s tender embrace. Today, she’s passionate about sharing her story of faith, healing, and resilience.In this episode, you’ll hear:How each family member mourns in different waysPractical ways to support someone through the loss of a spouseHelpful resources for anyone walking through a lossAnd more!This conversation was so helpful in learning how to show love and encouragement to a dear friend who is walking through a loss today.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/amy-graves-boyd-270Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...

What is the Next Day Principle?It’s a practice that we have not only implemented in our own marriage and family, but it’s also something we recommend to other couples in our coaching all the time.It helps to slow down reactivity, giving you time to clarify your feelings and determine what you still need to take to your spouse. The Next Day Principle is simply this: instead of reacting in the moment of a conflict with the full weight of your frustrations and emotions, you wait until the next day to bring it up with your spouse.In this episode, you’ll hear:The value of slowing conversation downTips for practicing the Next Day PrincipleThe importance of being responsive rather than reactiveAnd more!We hope this conversation blesses you!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/next-day-principle-269Check out our other resources: Mark and Jill’s Marriage Story Marriage Coaching Marriage 2.0 Intensives Speaking Schedule Book Mark and Jill to Speak Online Courses Books Marriage Resources: Infidelity Recovery For Happy Marriages For Hurting Marriages For Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources: New/Preschool Moms Moms with Gradeschoolers Moms with Teens and Tweens Moms with Kids Who Are Launching Empty Nest...