Ep #40 Caring Can't Prevent Every Bad Thing

Your cat loves you. But would they think twice about committing murder right in front of you? This week, we question the moral compass of our feline friends, share some rather incriminating animal stories, and take a few unexpected turns into pigs, religion, and what it means to be yourself. How do we get from one to the other? Excellent question.

We all live by rules. But how many of them did we actually choose? This week, we talk about the rules we inherit, the fears that keep us from doing things differently, and what can happen when we start questioning both. From travel and burnout to boundaries, grief, and the strange ways a change of scenery can introduce us to a different version of ourselves, this conversation goes in plenty of unexpected directions. Plus, meat suits, Lady Gaga, sleeping in other beds, and the usual Mostly Functional detours. Maybe the question isn't whether you're doing life right. Maybe it's whose rules you're using to decide.

There's no shortage of things to care about. But does caring mean we have to respond to everything, speak up about everything, or carry everything? This week, we talk about protecting your energy in a world that constantly asks for your attention, opinions, and outrage. From social media and public judgment to the emotional weight of caring for animals, we explore how to decide what deserves your voice, what deserves your energy, and what you can let go. Because caring deeply doesn't mean you have to carry it all.

Caring deeply doesn't mean we can prevent every bad thing from happening. This week, we (Julie and Derek) talk about what animals have taught us about aging, dignity, hard decisions, and the complicated line between caring and trying to control the outcome. We also explore what happens when animals forgive us more easily than we forgive ourselves, and how guilt, blame, and shame can add another layer of pain to already painful experiences. Because sometimes the most loving thing we can do isn't to fix everything. It's to make sure the life in front of us is still one worth living.

Sometimes change arrives slowly, and sometimes it blindsides you. This week, we talk about the moments that create new versions of us, from leaving home and losing people we love to getting fired, changing careers, betrayal, and choosing a different path. We also wonder whether we can feel the next version of ourselves coming before we're quite ready to become them. And because this is Mostly Functional, somehow tariffs, pain meds, prickly lettuce, solar flares, and conspiracy theories make their way into the conversation too.

What are you bad at? And maybe more importantly, do you actually need to get better at it? This week, we talk about the things we're terrible at, the things we'd genuinely like to improve, and the things we've spent years trying to master before realizing we can simply let them go. Because sometimes growth isn't about getting better. It's about knowing what you're ready to stop working so hard at.

What happens when caregiving ends, but the hypervigilance, grief, and loss of identity remain? This week, we explore post-caregiver syndrome and the disorientation that can follow when someone no longer needs you. We also share the remarkable rescue of Winston, a pig who escaped a transport truck, and reflect on asking for what you need, protecting a tender heart, and learning who you are beyond the role of caregiver.

We're all looking for connection, even if we don't always realize it. This week, we dive into four ways we find meaning—in ourselves, with other people, through the natural world (animals!), and by connecting to something greater. The conversation meanders (as it always does) through stories, laughter, reflection, and a few unexpected detours, ending with a reminder that the richest life isn't built on doing more—it's built on feeling more deeply connected. It's a thoughtful, funny, and heartfelt conversation that might just leave you wondering where you feel most connected—and where you're longing for more.

We all want to feel appreciated. But where should that appreciation come from? In this episode, we explore one of life's most meaningful questions: Is appreciation an inside job, an outside job, or a little of both? We dive into why compliments sometimes don't land, why so many of us crave recognition, and how learning to appreciate ourselves changes the way we receive appreciation from others. If you've ever wondered why you still don't feel "enough" even when others tell you that you are, this conversation is for you.

In this episode we talk about what life has taught us. Hard won lessons typically come from our most painful moments and animal work provides some of the deepest most meaningful lessons about life there is. This convo is rich, jump in.    To join Julie's weekly e-inspiration, click here.