Throw the Stone: How Perfectionism and Self Doubt are Holding you Back

Finding Balance and Embracing Change: A Reframe on Taking ActionIn this episode, I explore how perfectionism, self-doubt, and the fear of Ripple effects hold us back from taking action. Through stories about a Chia pet, a Japanese cafe, and insights from psychology and architecture, I share practical ways to shift our mindset and embrace the unpredictable outcomes of our efforts.Key topics:The importance of seeing actions as stones thrown into the water, without obsessing over ripplesHow a simple Chia pet became a symbol of balance, adaptability, and humor in lifeJulia Cameron's view of perfectionism as a fear-based habit that focuses on what's wrongThe concept from Ellen Langer that regrets are pointless because we can't know what alternative choices would have broughtStrategies for acting without over-control, trusting the process, and measuring success by effort, not outcomeThe idea of "throwing the stone" as a commitment to progress rather than perfectionRecognizing the small ripple effects of everyday actions, inspired by a Japanese cafe storyEncouragement to act regardless of perceived outcomes and to find beauty and humor in changeTimestamps: 00:00 - Welcome and episode overview: overcoming self-doubt and perfectionism 00:31 - The circuitous journey of rewriting and refining ideas 01:28 - The inner critic and working through self-doubt 02:28 - The story of the architect's dead plants and the Chia pet symbolism 03:24 - The importance of balance and the visual metaphor of dead plants 04:21 - The simplicity of Chia pets and their role in creating life balance 05:48 - The architect's Chia bunny as a reminder to not take life too seriously 07:14 - How perfectionism paralyzes us and the value of taking small actions 08:11 - Julia Cameron’s view of perfectionism as destructive, fear-based habit 09:38 - Predicting ripples and trusting the unpredictable impact of actions 10:33 - The metaphor of throwing stones and letting ripples be 11:31 - The influence of small literary acts and the ripple effect 12:26 - The Japanese cafe story illustrating unseen ripple effects 13:54 - The philosophy that small acts can make a big difference 14:23 - Ellen Langer on making decisions right instead of worrying about the "right" decision 15:21 - Listening to your inner whispers and embracing uncertainty 16:21 - Act without measuring outcomes, focusing on the effort 16:49 - Reflective prompts: Where can you "throw the stone" in your life? 17:17 - Closing thoughts: trusting the process and embracing changeResources & Links:Julia Cameron - The Artist's WayEllen Langer - Mindfulness and Decision MakingHot Chocolate on Thursdays - Book (Note: exact link may vary)The Power of Ripples - Article on Ripple Effects

Most of us are unintentionally curating the company we keep digitally and in real life and it’s shaping who we are more than we realize. What if the key to deeper connection isn’t about mastering relationships but just crossing the threshold to invite someone in?In this episode I explore how the simple act of inviting someone into your space – whether physically or virtually – can revolutionize your sense of community and well-being. Inspired by stories from feminist art and insights from renowned relationship experts you’ll discover how tiny intentional steps like sharing olives and a beer —or hosting in your pajamas can break down barriers to genuine connection.If you’ve ever hesitated to host reach out or simply wondered how to deep in your relationship relationships in a noisy disconnected world this episode is your gentle push to start small.Perfect for introverts and extroverts alike this episode redefines with true gathering looks like in our modern age . 

Most of us are unintentionally curating the company we keep digitally and in real life and it’s shaping who we are more than we realize. What if the key to deeper connection isn’t about mastering relationships but just crossing the threshold to invite someone in?In this episode I explore how the simple act of inviting someone into your space – whether physically or virtually – can revolutionize your sense of community and well-being. Inspired by stories from feminist art and insights from renowned relationship experts you’ll discover how tiny intentional steps like sharing olives and a beer —or hosting in your pajamas can break down barriers to genuine connection.If you’ve ever hesitated to host reach out or simply wondered how to deep in your relationship relationships in a noisy disconnected world this episode is your gentle push to start small.Perfect for introverts and extroverts alike this episode redefines with true gathering looks like in our modern age .

In this episode we’re are taking risks, moving past self doubt and supporting ourselves along the way. With practices inspired by both Carol Dweck and Phil Stutz - this episode provides a much needed mindset shift for all the dreamers and doers out there , plus an actionable journal prompt to get you moving in the direction you’re meant for. If you’re ready for the next step join me at the next journal workshop. MAKIN’ MOVES JOURNAL WORKSHOP MAY 10th 🙌🏻 Sign up below 🤍https://www.limitlessintegrativewellness.com/event-details/makin-moves-with-morning-mugs?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAafoI6hDaDnJupwRzv-phnG2PwyvmNgnUQEu__kE7xyLyUedD3C7-HGq1TCdJw_aem_awJ3Pxlnjxfq_YNf3dNT_g

In this episode we dive into the forgotten, abandon goals, and dreams- and put them to rest. We also get into some tough love and ask the hard questions. Your life is a reflection of what you’re willing to do, say, behave, act on …or not. Come take a listen. Until next time be well. For more: follow me on @morningmugspodcast

In this episode we’ll find our way back to hope. With advice from the book -Build the Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier by Harvard Professor @arthurcbrooks. It’s a reminder that optimism is not hope, but that hope lies in the belief that things can get better. This episode offers actions- personal agency - towards a life filled with hope and away from despair .

In this episode we’ll confront the reality of feeling stuck…fear. Often when we want to make the next move but can’t seem to get out of our own way -it’s not because we’re not ready, it’s not because we need more education , experience etc., it’s because we’re scared of failure. “We cannot escape fear. We can only transform it into a companion that accompanies us on all our exciting adventures…” - Susan Jeffers

How many pages will be left empty because your process was dampened by doubt and deliberation ? - Rick Rubin In this episode we’ll discuss the illusion of the “ perfect timing”. Reflecting on the creative nudges or whispers that we left behind, and how/when do we lean in to take the leap. Also NEW journal night details: The Lost Draft , Nov. 21st . Check out @morningmugspodcast for more info !

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I — I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” — Robert Frost. * excpert from The Road Not Taken In the 80th episode of the Morning Mugs podcast, Kiera discussed the concept of the "road less traveled" and how it can be applied to various aspects of life. She emphasized the importance of stepping out of one's comfort zone, practicing self-awareness, and liking oneself as part of this journey. Kiera also announced her upcoming event, "The Lost Draft," a journal night at Fire Island Vines and Bayshore on November 21st, where participants can explore their own "lost drafts" and rewrite their stories. Kiera expressed her excitement and gratitude for the podcast's progress and shared her plans for the future, including reflecting on the podcast's direction and upcoming events.

In this episode Prof.Virginia Horan and I  discuss the changing landscape of education, focusing on the impact of technology, parental involvement, and mental health on students. We talk about the importance of a holistic approach to education, self-care, and time management, and the value of traditional methods combined with technology. We also highlight the need for personal growth, resilience, and self-esteem.  Professor Ginny Horan has been teaching Communication since 1991 as a member of the full-time faculty at Suffolk County Community College. After researching the decline in student success, she discovered many Gen Z students lack time management skills, so five years ago she created a paper planner that teaches time management AND offers emotional and academic support through weekly video tutorials that match printed tips in the planner itself. Episode Takeaways  All technology is not necessarily good technology when it comes to learning  More students today in college are ambivalent and unsure  Flashcards, time management, and note-taking are still essential  Parents are also heavily managing their child’s high school life which makes learning time management more challenging Every college has tutoring, test anxiety workshops, time management workshops, and mental health resources The Centered Student planners have a QR code to provide emotional support and tips throughout the first year of college Writing by hand slows students down, to think about what they are actually writing When you are feeling overwhelmed try to HALT  and assess if you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired  When you don’t feel in control you feel anxious, if you feel in control you’ll feel a little less anxious Parents you have to let your kids fail Guided meditations are a perfect way to ease instant anxiety  Maybe we could all  Check out the website for more resources: www.thecenteredstudentplanner.com  Follow along on Instagram too :) @thecenteredstudent