Why NICU Parents Stay in Survival Mode: Trauma, Hypervigilance & Healing S4E66

In this episode, I’m joined by Lottie from Leo’s Neonatal and NICU Neuroscience to explore what happens in the brain and body during and after neonatal care.We talk about the NICU nervous system response, what survival mode actually means, and why hyper vigilance, snapping, overthinking, and the inability to switch off make so much sense after trauma. We also explore matrescence, the neuroscience of becoming a parent, and how neonatal care can shape identity, stress responses, and long-term wellbeing.Lottie and I discuss why so many NICU parents feel stuck in survival mode long after discharge, how trauma can show up physically in the body, and the powerful role of validation, community, and nervous system support in healing.In this episode, we talk about:⁠The NICU Space Community⁠An online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.The NICU Parent Handbook A new resource I’ve created to help parents make sense of the thoughts and feelings that often follow neonatal care. It explores common experiences like guilt, grief, hypervigilance and anxiety, alongside practical tools to help parents cope. Coming soon.Stay connectedInstagram: ⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠Website: ⁠⁠miraclemoon.co.uk⁠⁠⁠The NICU Space community: ⁠The NICU Space⁠⁠@nicu_neuroscienceOne last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

In this episode, I’m joined by Hayley, NICU mum and creator behind The SEN and Prem Mum, who shares her experience of premature birth during COVID, her daughter’s neonatal journey, and the path to discovering autism and ADHD within her family.We talk about Hayley’s experience of severe preeclampsia and delivering at 29 weeks, alongside her daughter’s autism diagnosis and her own late diagnosis of ADHD and autism. We explore the complex overlap between prematurity, trauma, and neurodivergence, as well as the realities of parenting neurodivergent children while navigating sensory overwhelm and finding support.In this episode, we talk about:Premature birth at 29 weeks due to severe preeclampsiaNICU experiences, separation after birth, and early emotional impactRecognising early signs of autism and navigating diagnosisThe overlap between prematurity, trauma, autism, and ADHDReceiving a late diagnosis of autism and ADHD as a parentParenting neurodivergent children and managing sensory overwhelmResources & links mentioned in this episode:The NICU Space CommunityAn online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.The NICU Parent HandbookA new resource I’ve created to help parents make sense of the thoughts and feelings that often follow neonatal care. It explores common experiences like guilt, grief, hypervigilance and anxiety, alongside practical tools to help parents cope. Coming soon.Stay connectedInstagram: @miraclemoonukWebsite: ⁠miraclemoon.co.uk⁠The NICU Space community: ⁠The NICU Space⁠Connect with our guest, HayleyInstagram: @the_sen_and_prem_mum One last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

In this episode, Lorna Tallowin, NICU parent and founder of Super Dinky, turns the questions back to me, inviting me to share my own NICU journey.We talk about my pregnancy, delivering unexpectedly at 31 weeks, and what the early weeks in neonatal intensive care were like. We also explore survival mode, dissociation, ongoing anxiety, and the identity shift that comes with being a NICU parent.Lorna and I discuss why community, validation, and psychological support are so important for parents after NICU, and the gaps that still exist in care.In this episode, we talk about:My premature birth at 31 weeks and early NICU experiencesSurvival mode, dissociation, and emotional overwhelmOngoing anxiety, hypervigilance, and health-related worry after NICUGuilt, grief, and the pressure to “make it up” to your childThe importance of community and validation for NICU parentsHow Miracle Moon began and grew from lived experienceResources & links mentioned in this episode:The NICU Space CommunityAn online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.The NICU Parent HandbookA new resource I’ve created to help parents make sense of the thoughts and feelings that often follow neonatal care. It explores common experiences like guilt, grief, hypervigilance and anxiety, alongside practical tools to help parents cope. Coming soon. Super DinkyFounded by Lorna, NICU Mum and Beth NICU nurse, @superdinky creates meaningful products for NICU families while raising awareness of the experience and helping parents feel part of a wider community. SuperDinky - Premature Baby Clothes and NICU support based in the UKStay ConnectedInstagram: @miraclemoonukWebsite: miraclemoon.co.ukThe NICU Space community: The NICU SpaceOne last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

Before we mention today’s guest – a quick update about The NICU Space Podcast. Today’s episode wraps up season 3, and we’re going to be taking a short break over Christmas and early 2026. We hope that you and your family also manage a restful time over Christmas, whatever that looks like for you.Today’s guest, Ola, is the founder of the charity “Colourful Beginnings”, which she created after having two premature babies in NICU. The charity does so much good work to support other NICU parents, primarily around sending out “treasure boxes” of things the parents can keep and know that they are being thought of.She joins us to talk through her experiences in NICU, how the charity got started and the work that they do to help others going through the same.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Ola’s experiences of having her first child at 23 weeks and her second at 29 weeks- The disbelief and shock she went through on learning she was pregnant for a second time- What led to her creating the charity, Colourful Beginnings- The Colourful Beginnings treasure boxes and how the charity works to support other NICU parents💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

Kate’s son Frank battled group B strep meningitis at just 3 days old, which led to him being diagnosed with cerebral palsy and epilepsy. Kate shares with us her hospital experience, her fears that his conditions would limit his life, and how she accepted and came to terms with the life her family now lives.Frank is a happy, giggly child and Kate is a wonderful influence for parents going through similar experiences to hers, you can follow her now “@overatkates”.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- The events that followed after Kate’s son, Frank, contracted group B strep at 3 days old- What group B strep is and the aftermath of the infection- Coming to terms with her son’s diagnoses of cerebral palsy and epilepsy- Staying positive and how to move towards acceptance 💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

In today’s episode, we’re talking to three preemie parents about their NICU experiences and premature births – we discuss everything from preparing for a NICU stay, to the mental health impact afterwards, and even if there were any good parts of NICU. If you’ve got your own NICU story, we’re sure you’ll find similarities in our guests' experiences, and remind yourself that you’re not alone – help and support is out there.In this episode, we’re joined by:- Hanna, mum to 4 year old twin girls Ruby & Scarlet who were born at 27 weeks after a difficult pregnancy and spent 10 months in NICU and PICU- Sammy, mum to Niamh, born unexpectedly early at 31 weeks after a smooth pregnancy and spent 6 weeks in special care- Katy, mum to 3 year old Finley who had an expected NICU stay after he was born at 31 weeks due to a placental issue and spent 6 weeks in NICU across 2 hospitals💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

When she went into labour at 20 weeks pregnant, Audrey Williams Joseph was told that her baby would not survive. 30 years later, he’s living his life and was Audrey’s inspiration for creating the support that she never had in the 90s – six residential care homes for children and adults that have additional needs. Audrey is a true inspiration, and this episode will help you to redefine what you think of as winning, and celebrate the small moments that make up each day.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Audrey’s son, who was born at 20 weeks and wasn’t expected to survive- The impact of being in limbo in NICU- Having faith to stay strong and overcome doctors’ predictions- How Audrey turned her experience into a mission to create care homes💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

Family Integrated Care is such an important thing for NICUs to implement – after all, it’s not just the baby in NICU that’s going through the experience. On today’s podcast episode, we’re hosting a round table discussion with parents and professionals alike to discuss what FICare is, how NICUs can improve how they offer it, and what the future holds for it. We’re joined by:- Emily, a Neonatal Consultant from Liverpool- Chessie, a Clinical Psychologist from Bristol- Colm, an Advanced Neonatal Nurse Practitioner from Northern Ireland- And Sue, mum to Luke who was born at 30 weeks and spent two months in NICUWhether you know anything about FICare already or not, today’s episode is an important listen that shows how we can make improvements to include the whole family in neonatal care.💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

In this powerful episode, Aideen (@ivfmumblings) shares her honest story of infertility, IVF, NICU, and loss. After seven rounds of IVF, she became pregnant with twins, but at 30 weeks she went into premature labour, was put under general anaesthetic for an emergency section, and lost one of her babies to suspected NEC.Only four months later, she conceived naturally and found herself back in NICU at 36 weeks. Now pregnant again, Aideen opens up about how she’s advocating for herself this time, the importance of mental health support after NICU, and what she wishes she’d known then.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Going through IVF – not just once, but seven times- Being pregnant with twins and then going into NICU- The unimaginable pain of losing a twin- Going through subsequent pregnancies (even natural ones) after baby loss- How to advocate for yourself in NICU and during pregnancy after loss💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

Today’s guest, Laura Gallagher, author of the children’s book “RoboBabies” experienced fertility difficulties and miscarriages. Laura’s first son was born via IVF, and went onto have multiple pregnancy losses. In this episode, Laura talks how she handled her son witnessing her going through this, and all the tricky emotions she faced, and why shame and embarrassment were two that she struggled with the most. We talk about healing, boundaries and how to cope when you feel like your body has failed. In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Handling the difficult emotions that come along with fertility difficulties- Whether to talk to your children about what you’re going through- What Laura tried in order to heal from her losses- Why gratitude is different to toxic positivity following hard experiences💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at [email protected].🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk