The Art of Dating: Five Essential Do's and Don'ts

Send us a textStruggling with dating in today's confusing landscape? Ken and Tabatha draw from their marriage to deliver straight-talking wisdom about what actually works in relationships. "You got to be friends first," Ken emphasizes, highlighting how many couples rush into relationships without genuinely liking each other. This foundation of friendship—actually enjoying each other's company—creates the energy that sustains love through challenging seasons.The hosts don't shy away from addressing physical attraction, timing important conversations, and maintaining standards while dating. "Know your worth and don't give discounts," becomes their rallying cry against settling for less than you deserve.Their practical advice extends to relationship red flags too—like being "pressed" or desperate, looking for someone to complete you, giving too much too fast, playing house before marriage, and putting yourself in compromising positions. Each point is illustrated with relatable stories and insights from their ministry experience.Most powerfully, they address the spiritual foundation necessary for lasting relationships. "Don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers," they caution, explaining how mismatched spiritual values can create lifelong challenges that even the most devoted partner can't overcome.Whether you're navigating the early stages of dating or preparing for marriage, this episode provides a blueprint for building relationships that stand the test of time. Ready to transform your approach to dating? This conversation might just change how you view relationships forever.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWhat happens when the unthinkable creeps into your relationship? The answers might surprise you. After counseling countless couples through the aftermath of infidelity, we've discovered that affairs rarely "just happen" – they're the result of small compromises that accumulate over time.Drawing from both personal and professional experience, we reveal how good people can make devastating choices when they fail to establish proper boundaries. Our own marriage has weathered significant storms over 25 years, and we've learned that preventing infidelity requires intentional guardrails long before temptation strikes.The episode explores common pathways that lead to affairs: emotional disconnection, unmet needs, loneliness within marriage, personal brokenness, revenge, crisis situations, and simple selfishness. We break down the progression from innocent interaction to full-blown affair, revealing how adultery always begins in the heart.Most importantly, we share ten practical strategies for affair-proofing your relationship, including guarding your heart and mind, daily investment in emotional intimacy, maintaining a vibrant sexual connection, setting firm boundaries with the opposite sex, practicing complete transparency, surrounding yourself with pro-marriage friends, dealing quickly with conflict, and making God the center of your relationship.Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, these principles provide concrete protection against one of marriage's greatest threats. The stakes couldn't be higher – as we explain, the consequences of infidelity go far beyond momentary pleasure, potentially destroying your family, reputation, and decades of shared history.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWhat critical questions should you ask before saying "I do"? With half of all marriages ending in divorce despite everyone believing theirs will last forever, these three game-changing questions could save your relationship from becoming another statistic.The marriage journey transforms us in ways we never anticipate. The first essential question recognizes this reality: "Can you handle me changing?" That vibrant 23-year-old you fell in love with will inevitably become a different person at 43 and 63. Many of us marry an image rather than a real person—attracted to their current appearance, ambitions, or how they make us feel—without considering the transformation that decades bring. Whether it's physical changes after children, shifting career goals, or evolving priorities, marriage requires love that transcends these natural evolutions.Equally important is the counterpoint: "Can you handle me not changing?" We often enter marriage with a subconscious desire to mold our partner into versions of ourselves. That spouse who struggles with punctuality, plays video games excessively, or approaches finances differently may never fundamentally change these traits. Before marriage, become a "fruit inspector"—carefully examining consistent patterns and honestly asking if you can accept those unchangeable aspects for a lifetime. Many relationships deteriorate because one spouse continuously pressures the other to become someone they're not designed to be.Finally, ask: "Will you love me when you don't like me?" Every marriage experiences seasons where affection wanes and irritation grows, yet commitment must remain. Many couples mistake the temporary butterflies of the infatuation stage (typically lasting three months to three years) for the foundation of marriage. Real love chooses connection even during difficult seasons and finds ways to rebuild fondness through intentional efforts.These questions highlight why physical intimacy before marriage can cloud judgment about fundamental compatibility issues. The emotional bonds created through sex often lead people to overlook critical differences that become relationship-breaking problems after marriage.Take time to honestly explore these three questions with your partner. Your willingness to face these realities now could make the difference between a marriage that thrives through decades of change and one that joins the sobering divorce statistics.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textAuthenticity is becoming increasingly rare in our carefully curated world. While many struggle to present perfect images of themselves online and offline, Ken and Tabatha tackle the transformative power of radical honesty.They introduce the HOT principle—Honest, Open, Transparent—as the foundation for truly meaningful relationships, whether in marriage, friendship, business, or ministry. "I don't understand why people portray themselves as something they're not," Ken reflects, challenging listeners to examine their own commitment to truth.Throughout the conversation, they explore how dishonesty creates fractures in trust that eventually break relationships apart. "Without honesty, you don't have trust, and without trust, you don't have a relationship," Tabitha emphasizes. The spiritual implications are profound too—lying literally aligns us with what scripture calls "the father of lies" while truthfulness reflects God's character.For singles, they offer straight-talking advice: put honesty near the top of your list when looking for a spouse, second only to loving God. For marrieds, they discuss how even withholding truth damages intimacy. For parents, they suggest practical ways to teach children the value of honesty without resorting to "white lies" about Santa or storks.The episode concludes with five practical steps to grow in honesty: get honest with yourself first, speak truth in love, release fear of rejection, practice small honest acts daily, and invite accountability through safe conversations. Ken shares a powerful personal story about correcting a $1,000 billing error, demonstrating how choosing honesty—even when costly—yields greater rewards than monetary gain.Ready to become more authentic in your relationships? Listen now, then share with someone who needs this message. Subscribe to get new episodes every Thursday at 3pm!GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textGET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textGET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a text"How often should married couples have sex?" It's the question many ask but few discuss openly. In this refreshingly candid conversation, Ken and Tabatha break through the awkwardness to address what happens when physical intimacy fades in marriage.Drawing from 24 years of marriage experience, they challenge conventional wisdom about bedroom dynamics with their revolutionary principle: "Only one person needs to be in the mood for sex to happen." This perspective shift alone has rescued countless relationships from the clinically-defined "sexless marriage" (less than 10 times per year).The hosts don't shy away from addressing real challenges couples face: changing libidos, physical issues, loss of attraction, and the dreaded "not tonight" rejection. Their practical advice includes a powerful rule—if you decline your spouse's advances, initiate within 24 hours to prevent emotional distance from growing.You'll discover why planning sex might be exactly what your marriage needs, why both spouses should take turns initiating, and why touching throughout the day creates the foundation for deeper connection. Ken and Tabitha blend spiritual wisdom with practical strategies, offering seven keys to revitalizing physical intimacy that apply whether you've been married for months or decades.This episode provides a judgment-free zone where couples can find hope and practical steps forward. Whether you're in a season of thriving intimacy or struggling to reconnect physically, these insights will transform how you approach one of marriage's most important dimensions. Ready to strengthen your connection? Listen, apply these principles, and watch your relationship grow closer than ever before.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textThe phrase "burnout" has become a buzzword, almost a badge of honor in some circles, but what if our fear of burnout is actually preventing us from discovering our true potential? In this eye-opening conversation, we challenge the prevailing narrative around burnout and offer a fresh perspective on stress, capacity, and growth.Drawing from personal experiences, we distinguish between genuine burnout—characterized by emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion—and the increasingly common fear of pushing ourselves too hard. This distinction matters profoundly. When we're so afraid of burnout that we back away from our limits, we never discover our ceiling, which means we can never raise it.Think about building muscle. Growth happens when you push slightly beyond your comfort zone. The same principle applies to life capacity. We share the powerful "one more principle"—doing just one more rep, making one more call, having one more difficult conversation—which creates the stress needed for expansion. Your ceiling must become your floor if you want meaningful growth.For those genuinely experiencing burnout, we provide practical strategies: recognizing that rest is holy (not lazy), implementing delegation, making small adjustments to daily habits, prioritizing physical health, and helping others. We outline five key approaches to overcoming burnout fear: seeking mentorship, identifying your current capacity and committing to grow it, differentiating between actual burnout and fear of hard work, developing an "I can" mentality, and breaking up with fear.The freedom comes not from avoiding stress but from building the capacity to handle more without being overwhelmed. This requires finding your limit, pressing against it, and allowing that threshold to expand. Rather than living in fear, choose to walk by faith—embracing the growth that comes through pressing your limits while maintaining wisdom about true self-care.What's your ceiling? And are you ready to raise it?GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textFeeling the chill in your marriage bedroom? You're not alone. In this raw and honest episode, Ken and Tabatha break down the walls of silence surrounding sexless marriages, offering hope and practical wisdom from their 25-year journey together.Marriage isn't always sexy – especially when life throws curveballs like career stress, parenting demands, health challenges, and aging bodies into the mix. After navigating breast cancer, menopause, and the everyday complexities of long-term commitment, Ken and Tabatha share how they've maintained a vibrant intimate connection despite the obstacles."When you're not in the mood" becomes more than just an occasional state – for many couples, it evolves into a persistent pattern that threatens the marriage foundation. The hosts challenge listeners to examine whether they've settled for less than God's design for marital intimacy, offering a biblical framework from 1 Corinthians 7 that reframes sex as both a privilege and responsibility within marriage.Through candid conversation, they address common barriers to physical connection: exhaustion, body image issues, medical challenges, and the subtle ways couples begin prioritizing everything except their intimate life. Tabitha specifically speaks to women about recognizing and embracing their own sexual desires rather than viewing intimacy solely as meeting their husband's needs.This conversation goes beyond bedroom techniques to address the heart issues that lead to sexual disconnection. Whether you're struggling with mismatched sex drives, physical limitations, or simply finding yourself in a pattern of rejection and resentment, this episode offers a pathway back to the intimate connection you once shared.Ready to turn up the heat in your marriage? Listen now, and be sure to catch part two of this essential conversation about making Christian married sex great again.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textThe crushing weight of depression doesn't just affect the person diagnosed—it transforms marriages, reshaping how partners interact and survive together. Having walked this path ourselves, we're pulling back the curtain on what it truly takes to support a spouse battling the darkness of depression.Tabatha shares her 12-year journey through severe depression that began in childhood following her father's death and experiences with abuse. The physical manifestations—debilitating migraines, panic attacks, insomnia—became as real as the emotional pain. Yet after finding spiritual healing at 24, she's experienced over two decades of complete freedom from these symptoms."Depression isn't occasional sadness—it's getting stuck, becoming debilitated by it," Tabatha explains. "It's not something you can simply snap out of." This misunderstanding often leads to shame and isolation for those suffering.Ken reveals his own unexpected battle with depression following church leadership challenges and betrayal from those close to him. During this dark season, Tabatha became his bridge to healing—not by forcing him out of depression, but by supporting his vision when he couldn't see it himself, gathering resources to help him move forward, and giving him space when needed.We explore the powerful connection between unforgiveness and depression, sharing how forgiveness became the key that unlocked Tabitha's healing. The spiritual dimensions of depression often go unaddressed in clinical settings, yet we've witnessed countless breakthroughs when both spiritual and natural interventions work together.For those supporting a depressed spouse: speak life, not criticism. Understand their root struggles. Take spiritual authority over the situation while addressing practical needs. Build your own support system so you don't become depleted. And never stop believing that complete healing is possible—because we've lived it.If depression has invaded your marriage, join us for this episode filled with hope, practical wisdom, and the promise that depression doesn't have to be a life sentence. Your breakthrough might be closer than you think.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]