91: Why Some Friendships Drain the Life Out of You

In this powerful and refreshingly honest episode, Charli Wall sits down with her client, Karen, who shares the intimate story of her journey from “soggy and overflowing” tears to feeling grounded, spacious, and sovereign in her life.  In this conversation, we explore: The weight of emotional overflow — how Karen felt consumed by grief, family tensions, and a constant sense of heaviness The courage to reach out — pressing “send” on that first email and defying the inner voice that said “six weeks should be enough” Discovering slow, gentle unravelling — why true healing isn’t a quick fix, and how spacious conversations opened unexpected portals From fixing to allowing — how Karen stopped trying to “fix” everyone and learned to honour her own boundaries Learning to receive — the radical shifts that happen when a woman allows help, support, and provision into her life The ripple effects on relationships — how understanding masculine/feminine energetics transformed her partnership, family dynamics, and business Integrating wisdom into everyday life — from creative work as an artist to navigating family with new tools and compassion Trusting the body’s truth — how Karen learned to listen to somatic signals instead of overriding them Compassion and devotion to self — why it’s still surprisingly hard to write 10 things you love about yourself, and why it matters   Karen’s story is a potent reminder that it’s never “just one part of life” we’re working on.  It’s all connected — grief, relationships, health, creativity — and healing ripples outward. If you’re standing at the threshold, wondering whether it’s time to reach for help, Karen’s words might be exactly what you need to hear.    Resources Mentioned: The Keys to the Kingdom and the Queen's Code by Alison Armstrong The Places That Scare You by Pema Chödrön Charli’s She Finds Freedom Programme and Wild Awakening Circle Membership Charli’s Portal Collection (from her creative shop) Listen now and rediscover the courage that’s always been yours.   My free community can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/understandingyourfemininenature/ Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" https://charliwall.simplero.com/comfortableinyourownskin FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day program: https://charliwall.simplero.com/page/194297-fly-first-love-yourself Circle Community Membership £24.99 per month: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningcircle/ The Finding Freedom from Habits & Anxiety program can be found here: https://charliwall.simplero.com/ffha-programme Courage Dear Heart Podcast: https://iamcharliwall.com/courage-dear-heart-podcast/ Crete Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wild-awakening-crete-retreat/ Spanish Deep Nature Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningretreats/   Apply to work with me https://iamcharliwall.com/1-1-coaching/

You leave the café, the call, the catch-up…⁣ ⁣ And instead of feeling filled up, you feel flat.⁣ ⁣ Heavy.⁣ ⁣ Drained.⁣ ⁣ Like your soul’s been wrung out.⁣ ⁣ She talked.⁣ ⁣ You listened.⁣ ⁣ She unloaded.⁣ ⁣ You held it.⁣ ⁣ And not once did she ask how you were.⁣ ⁣ Here’s the truth no one wants to say out loud:⁣ 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗶𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗮𝗹.⁣ 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴.⁣ 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝘆𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵.⁣ ⁣ Sometimes it’s coming from guilt, from the good girl, from the part of you that’s terrified of disappointing someone.⁣ ⁣ And your body?⁣ ⁣ Your gut?⁣ ⁣ It always knows.⁣ ⁣ In this week’s #QuestionoftheWeek, I’m going live to talk about:⁣ ⁣ The difference between holding space and being emotionally used⁣ ⁣ Why does your energy leak in some friendships and not others⁣ ⁣ How to actually trust your gut without guilt⁣ ⁣ And the deeper wisdom underneath your exhaustion⁣ ⁣ ⁣ Let’s name what’s really going on behind the emotional hangovers.⁣ ⁣ Because you deserve friendships that nourish, not deplete.⁣   My free community can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/understandingyourfemininenature/ Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" https://charliwall.simplero.com/comfortableinyourownskin FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day program: https://charliwall.simplero.com/page/194297-fly-first-love-yourself Circle Community Membership £24.99 per month: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningcircle/ The Finding Freedom from Habits & Anxiety program can be found here: https://charliwall.simplero.com/ffha-programme Courage Dear Heart Podcast: https://iamcharliwall.com/courage-dear-heart-podcast/  Crete Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wild-awakening-crete-retreat/ Spanish Deep Nature Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningretreats/   Apply to work with me https://iamcharliwall.com/1-1-coaching/

In this deeply moving episode of Courage, Dear Heart, Charli is joined by the courageous and warm-hearted Lauren.  Together, they explore Lauren’s journey from the depths of anxiety, disassociation, and suicidal thoughts to finding her voice, her power, and a renewed connection with herself and her son. Lauren openly shares the traumatic early months of motherhood, navigating a complex and misunderstood medical journey with her son Casper, and the profound loneliness she experienced as her inner world began to unravel.  Through their one-to-one work together and the nurturing space of Charli’s Circle, Lauren began to feel seen, heard, and gently held through her descent. This episode weaves together themes of: Nervous system education and real-life regulation tools Motherhood and the weight of intuition being dismissed The power of safe connection and community Mental health, medical gaslighting, and reclaiming authority Learning to pause, soften, and live outside the “basement” Humour, swampy moments, and the sacredness of slowing down Lauren speaks candidly about being a former mental health nurse, the fantasy of madness as an escape, and the slow climb back into life—through breath, presence, and radical self-compassion. This conversation is both tender and empowering, a reminder that even in our darkest moments, there is a way through.  As Lauren beautifully says, "It wasn’t about fixing me. It was about someone seeing me, sitting with me in the pain, and holding on to hope when I couldn’t."   My free community can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/understandingyourfemininenature/ Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" https://charliwall.simplero.com/comfortableinyourownskin FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day program: https://charliwall.simplero.com/page/194297-fly-first-love-yourself Circle Community Membership £24.99 per month: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningcircle/ The Finding Freedom from Habits & Anxiety program can be found here: https://charliwall.simplero.com/ffha-programme Courage Dear Heart Podcast: https://iamcharliwall.com/courage-dear-heart-podcast/  Crete Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wild-awakening-crete-retreat/ Spanish Deep Nature Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningretreats/   Apply to work with me https://iamcharliwall.com/1-1-coaching/

What if the moments when you feel like you're falling apart... are actually the moments when you're being called deeper into yourself? In this episode of Courage, Dear Heart, we explore The Call to Descent—the sacred invitation to step beyond the surface and meet ourselves in the depths. Descent is not failure. It is not punishment. It is the feminine path of remembering—a return to truth, wholeness, and the wild, untamed knowing that has always lived within us. We explore:  What descent truly is and why it happens.  The ways we resist it and why surrendering makes it easier.  How grief, rage, and longing are initiations into deeper wisdom.  The power of myth—Inanna, Persephone, and the Selkie—as guides for our own journey.  Why The Call to Descent is the prelude to Sacred Descent, and what it means to step into this work with intention. The Spring Equinox is approaching—a portal into the next chapter, a moment of balance between light and dark. And with it comes the question:  Will you answer the Call to Descent? We begin this Thursday, March 20th, with a 7-day guided journey into the depths—an initiation into trust, surrender, and the wisdom of the unknown.  Join The Call to Descent   Join Sacred Descent Wild Awakening: Understanding Your Feminine Nature - https://www.facebook.com/groups/understandingyourfemininenature Crete Retreat 4-9th May 2025 - https://iamcharliwall.com/wild-awakening-crete-retreat/ Spain Retreat 15-20th September 2025 - https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningretreats/ Wild Awakening Circle Membership - https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningcircle/

In this episode of Courage, Dear Heart, I’m joined by the wonderful Julie Mosmuller, a dedicated facilitator of women’s circles, movement therapist, and embodiment coach.  Julie will be a special guest at my Wild Awakening Retreat in Crete (4th–9th May 2025), bringing her deep wisdom on feminine cycles, the land’s sacred history, and intuitive movement. We explore:  What courage means to Julie—staying true to the heart, even when it challenges societal expectations.  The shadow side of women’s work—navigating competition, perfectionism, and the complexities of feminine leadership.  Julie’s journey from the corporate world in London to embodying her feminine essence in Crete.  How somatic awareness transformed her life—shifting from chronic stress to deep connection with intuition and body wisdom.  The power of Crete as a land steeped in ancient feminine history, and why so many women feel called to it.  Insights into the Minoan civilisation, a matrilineal society where women’s wisdom was honoured.  Julie’s work with movement, voice, and drumming—and what she’ll be bringing to the Crete retreat. If you’re feeling the call to reconnect with your body, cycles, and the wisdom of the feminine, this conversation is for you.   Join us in Crete for this Wild Awakening Retreat!  Dates: 4th–9th May 2025  Location: Douliana, Crete  More info & bookings   Connect with Julie:  Website  Instagram  Facebook: Julie Caroline Mosmuller   Let’s stay connected!  Join my free community  Subscribe to Courage, Dear Heart for more deep and soulful conversations!

The Woman Who Lost Her Skin | A Story of Reclamation There is a moment in every woman’s life when she realises she has wandered too far from herself. Maybe she has spent years tending to others, pouring from an empty cup. Maybe she has contorted herself to fit a life that no longer fits her. Maybe she has forgotten what it feels like to belong—to her own body, her own desires, her own truth. In today’s episode, we explore the ancient tale of the Selkie—the woman who lost her skin. A wild, untamed being taken from her home, trapped in a life that slowly dries her out. She forgets what she once was… until the ache of remembering calls her back. This story holds a mirror to the ways we, too, lose our skin—our instincts, our feminine essence, our connection to the deep. But what does it take to reclaim ourselves? Join me as we dive into:  The Selkie myth and why it speaks to so many women  How we lose our skin in relationships, work, and daily life  The subtle signs that you are living exiled from yourself  What it means to begin the return—the path home to your own wild knowing If this resonates, I invite you to journey deeper with me inside: Coming Home to Yourself: Healing the Feminine Wounds We Carry March 8th 2025  Listen in, and if this speaks to you, share your reflections in the comments. Have courage, dear heart. The way home is waiting. My free community can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/understandingyourfemininenature/ Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" https://charliwall.simplero.com/comfortableinyourownskin FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day program: https://charliwall.simplero.com/page/194297-fly-first-love-yourself Circle Community Membership £24.99 per month: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningcircle/ The Finding Freedom from Habits & Anxiety program can be found here: https://charliwall.simplero.com/ffha-programme Courage Dear Heart Podcast: https://iamcharliwall.com/courage-dear-heart-podcast/  Crete Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wild-awakening-crete-retreat/ Spanish Deep Nature Retreat: https://iamcharliwall.com/wildawakeningretreats/   Apply to work with me https://iamcharliwall.com/1-1-coaching/  

In this heartfelt episode of Dear Heart, we dive into the delicate dance of love – a game not of winning or losing, but of connection, trust, and vulnerability. Discover how embracing your feminine essence can transform relationships, allowing love to flow naturally and authentically. 🌸 Let’s explore the art of receiving, the courage to let go, and the beauty of creating love from a place of worthiness and openness. 🎧 Tune in and join the journey to love that feels as abundant as it is meaningful. My free community can be found here (This is where I record a lot of my podcast episodes live) My Wild Awakening Circle ⭕️ Membership £24.99 monthly Courage Dear Heart Programme She Finds Freedom Programme Apply to work with me  https://linktr.ee/i_am_charli_wall Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day self-study program Courage Dear Heart Podcast YouTube Channel: Charli Wall Join us in Rewilding Woman Retreat in Andalusia, Spain this September 15th-20th, 2025 Courage Dear Heart Retreat in Crete 

In this episode of Courage, Dear Heart, we explore the concept of the “altar of the heart”—a sacred inner space where we can honour all parts of ourselves.  Charli invites you to reflect on what it means to create an altar within, where both our courage and vulnerability can coexist.  Through gentle reflection, Charli shares personal insights on how grief, joy, and the strength of the heart can be held together in deep compassion. Join us as we explore the quiet power of bringing our emotions to the altar of the heart, and discover how this inner space can offer profound healing and self-acceptance  My free community can be found here (This is where I record a lot of my podcast episodes live) My Wild Awakening Circle ⭕️ Membership £24.99 monthly Courage Dear Heart Programme She Finds Freedom Programme Apply to work with me  https://linktr.ee/i_am_charli_wall Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day self-study program Courage Dear Heart Podcast YouTube Channel: Charli Wall Join us in Rewilding Woman Retreat in Andalusia, Spain this September 15th-20th, 2025 Courage Dear Heart Retreat in Crete 

#couragedearheart ♥️🦁 with client Sally about her work with me both 1:1 and as a member of my Circle ⭕️ group. Sally's journey with me began in a unique way. She initially joined my field as a freebie coaching volunteer (See Guide #2 for Coaching Demos in my free FB community) and later decided to work with me 1:1 on Nervous System Regulation work.  We dived deep.  Have a listen to Sally as she articulates so beautifully her experience of our work together and the courage she has shown in "doing" the work to embody herSelf 😃 Sally is a sensitive soul passionate about sports, particularly tennis, music, the natural world, art, and painting. She has a chronic neurological disorder that impacts her mobility, but she continues to find ways to live her life despite her health challenges. The book we discussed is called:  Call of the Wild, How We Heal Trauma, Awaken Our Own Power, and Use It for Good, by Kimberley Ann Johnson. The essential oil combination that helped Sally so much can be found at the bottom of this blog's resources section if you scroll down.  She is such a joy. Love, Charli x LINK to Youtube Episode My free community can be found here (This is where I record a lot of my podcast episodes live) My Wild Awakening Circle ⭕️ Membership £24.99 monthly Courage Dear Heart Programme She Finds Freedom Programme Apply to work with me  https://linktr.ee/i_am_charli_wall Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day self-study program Courage Dear Heart Podcast YouTube Channel: Charli Wall Join us in Rewilding Woman Retreat in Andalusia, Spain this September 15th-20th, 2025 Courage Dear Heart Retreat in Crete 

Please join me as I have a beautiful conversation with my client, Simone Daly, who has worked with me for a few years. She has completely transformed her life from one of feeling anxious, scared, fearful, and like her family would be better off without her - to total freedom and living a life she only dreamed was possible.  Simone beautifully articulates the places she had to go to change her life. She is an incredible soul. You can find her Instagram here: @simone_rosalie_uk   LINK to Youtube Episode My free community can be found here (This is where I record a lot of my podcast episodes live) My Wild Awakening Circle ⭕️ Membership £24.99 monthly Courage Dear Heart Programme She Finds Freedom Programme Apply to work with me  https://linktr.ee/i_am_charli_wall Free series of 5 Vlogs - "Comfortable in your own skin" FLY - First Love Yourself 11-day self-study program Courage Dear Heart Podcast YouTube Channel: Charli Wall Join us in Rewilding Woman Retreat in Andalusia, Spain this June10th-15th, 2024 Courage Dear Heart Retreat in Crete