What Does It Mean When You Say “I Forgive”?

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/9OvsfA9HEOI. Forgiveness can mean different things—and those differences can have a significant impact on the process of healing when someone has hurt or betrayed you. Judy and I talk about what forgiveness might mean, and how some ways of understanding it can be disempowering while other ways can be empowering. Our newly redesigned website is at https://ctin7.com. Let us know what you think! Information about my video course “Betrayal and Forgiveness” is at https://brucechalmer.com/betrayal-and-forgiveness/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #BetrayalAndForgiveness #forgiveness #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/6_CuvZO8qbQ. What is betrayal trauma? What makes it particularly painful? Judy and I talk about betrayal, including some insights we’ve gained from our own experience. Our newly redesigned website is at https://ctin7.com. Let us know what you think! Information about my video course “Betrayal and Forgiveness” is at https://brucechalmer.com/betrayal-and-forgiveness/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #BetrayalAndForgiveness #forgiveness #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/y74GP_wzKGU. For many couples, talking about money is the third rail—you just don’t go there, or if you do, you get shocked. Our guest in this episode, Carl Richards, talks about why it’s so hard for couples to talk about money, and why money isn’t just about money. Carl’s “Sketch Guy” column ran in the New York Times for a decade. Our conversation delved into our personal histories with money and relationships. We had a delightful time talking with Carl, and hope you’ll enjoy the conversation too! Carl’s website is https://behaviorgap.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Bruce’s self-paced video course, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other, is now available! Check out the free introductory lesson. And use the coupon code “ctin7” for 20% off! Information at https:// brucechalmer.com/the-passion-paradox-course. Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #CouplesTherapyInSevenWords #ctin7 #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/aRN7sDmcjfU. What is Discernment Counseling? And how might it help you? In this episode, Judy and I talk about situations in which Discernment Counseling is appropriate, and ways that my approach is consistent with its goals. You can find more information about Discernment Counseling at https://brucechalmer.com/discernment-counseling-a-different-way-to-decide-what-to-do/. Our newly redesigned website is at https://ctin7.com. Let us know what you think! Information about the video course I mention in the episode is at https:// brucechalmer.com/courses. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/h3McIE-iuIM. The term “narcissist” has become something of a slur these days, and our guest in today’s episode, couples therapist James Christensen, recognizes this phenomenon. He doesn’t use the term much in working with couples, but his own experience of recognizing those tendencies in himself has helped him in his work. We also discuss how the work of the late Dr. David Schnarch—who was also a big influence on my (Bruce’s) way of thinking about couples work—has guided James. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Bruce’s self-paced video course, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other, is now available! Check out the free introductory lesson. And use the coupon code “ctin7” for 20% off! Information at https:// brucechalmer.com/the-passion-paradox-course. Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #CouplesTherapyInSevenWords #ctin7 #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/-nl4dO3qCpk. In an era of political polarization, how can couples survive when they belong to different political tribes? Is it even possible? Well.. Judy and I talk about the possibilities and pitfalls. The GMA segment we refer to is at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwo8--6n0XY. Our newly redesigned website is at https://ctin7.com. Let us know what you think! Information about the video course I mention in the episode is at https:// brucechalmer.com/courses. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/6pp6GZAgptY. How can a couple cope when one partner wants sex more often than the other? Is this inevitable in long-term relationships? Does it have to involve conflict, pressure, rejection, and pain? Our guest in this episode, Laura Jurgens, is an expert on desire discrepancy in couples and how to work through it. Laura’s website is https://laurajurgens.com/libido. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Bruce’s self-paced video course, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other, is now available! Check out the free introductory lesson. And use the coupon code “ctin7” for 20% off! Information at https:// brucechalmer.com/the-passion-paradox-course. Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #CouplesTherapyInSevenWords #ctin7 #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/JaYYg5luP_E. Why are people having less sex than they used to? What role does AI play in this tendency? Have we evolved to just want sex, or are we actually looking for the deep bond of love? Judy and I talk about these issues, and try to end on a hopeful note (you be the judge!). Our newly redesigned website is at https://ctin7.com. Let us know what you think! Information about the video course I mention in the episode is at https:// brucechalmer.com/courses. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/iw0zfpvcwTU. How can a couple navigate difficult, often painful transitions at different stages of life, and emerge stronger than before? Our guests in this episode, Art and Tonya Blanchford, tell us how they’ve done it, and continue to do so. Art’s website is https://artblanchford.com. Tonya’s website for her soon to be open café is https://coastalteacafe.com. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. Bruce’s self-paced video course, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other, is now available! Check out the free introductory lesson. And use the coupon code “ctin7” for 20% off! Information at https:// brucechalmer.com. Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #CouplesTherapyInSevenWords #ctin7 #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/BdRj4uZJuys. Is couples therapy always a good idea? (Turns out, no!) When might it hurt, and when might it help? And how can you make the best use of couples therapy if you decide you want to do it? In this episode, Judy and I talk about those topics. The name of the person we mentioned who talked to us about compassionate divorce is Sarene Arias—check out our interview with her at our website, https://ctin7.com. Information about the video course I mention in the episode is at https://tppcourse.brucechalmer.com. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer’s newsletter right from our homepage. Judy’s book is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #couplestherapyinsevenwords #ctin7 #stability #intimacy #ThePassionParadox #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander