The Final Podblem

WELL WE'RE TFP, AND WE'RE BACK FROM THE DEAD to tell you what's been up with us and also read you An Poime! Also, Nick finally admits the Joker was right, the true source of all bad jokes is discovered and we learn about Casey's shocking ties to a dinosaur nobody's ever friggin' heard of!The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas Cohen and Casey Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

This episode is dedicated to the memory of Nick's Nana. She was the best.Holmes and Watson are called upon to see why a dude is acting so weird! Quit being weird, guy! Also there's a VERY GOOD DOG and TWO HORSES THAT ARE BROTHERS and, as if you hadn't guessed yet, A MUMMY. We didn't even make any of those up!We also comparison-shop possibly regional sandwich chains, plan to take drugs for the amusement of others and create some friggin' ambiance up in here.Free text of this week's story: https://www.dfw-sherlock.org/uploads/3/7/3/8/37380505/1927_april_the_adventure_of_shoscombe_old_place.pdfFree audio of this week's story: https://librivox.org/the-memoirs-of-sherlock-holmes-by-sir-arthur-conan-doyle-2/The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas "Cage The Tomato Plant" Cohen and Casey "Anglin' Anglicans" Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

We felt that this was one of the best and maybe most important preshows we’ve ever done, and so we have BROKEN THE BINDINGS OF TRADITION like so many front teeth chipping against the glass pitcher-rim of Great Need, when all we wanted was a friggin’ sip of grape Kool-Aid, which here represents mental health advocacy and gorillas.

Holmes and Watson are hired to suss out the source of a stock-sorceeror's spouse's sudden and suspicious skulking and skulduggery in their secluded summer seat, and end up asking the question that all men must face eventually: How much is that monster in the window?Also, we delve into the Great Horse Factory Explosion of '82, the inevitability of being Nicholas Cohen, and how this story is an instance of Arthur Conan Doyle implementing the Scrappy-Doo Gambit.We apologize in advance for Casey confusing the Michael Keaton and the Val Kilmer; when asked to defend his actions he threw a smoke bomb to the floor and hid behind a nearby potted plant.Free e-text of this week's story: https://sherlock-holm.es/stories/pdf/a4/1-sided/yell.pdf Free audio of this week's story: https://librivox.org/the-memoirs-of-sherlock-holmes-version-2-by-sir-arthur-conan-doyle/ The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas "Oops, All Lasers" Cohen and Casey 'Cause of Death: Horse Factory Explosion' Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

We briefly discuss a confusingly bad, racist story, then bury it in the shallow grave it deserves and instead explore how to responsibly enjoy problematic media (it's not hard!), how to learn about people whose experience is different from yours (ask them!) and what on earth is wrong with people who get mad when their media become inclusive (almost everything!).We're not linking to this story because it's racist garbage you don't need in your life! If you wanna read it on your own, feel free.Pods & Ends:-The Marrow of Tradition, by Charles Chesnutt-Born A Crime, by Trevor NoahThe Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘I'm Gonna Go Steal India’ Cohen and Casey ‘The Dinkleberg Refutation’ Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

Special guest Paul Thomas Miller of the Watsonian Weekly podcast joins us to discuss one of the wildest tales we've encountered yet, and also tricks us into agreeing to start another podcast, buying his book and playing a cruel new game that takes advantage of our American weakness toward dipthongs, resulting in double damage and the 'illiterate' status effect. WHO stole the Crown Diamond, and can they be stopped before melting it down in Royal Crown Cola? HOW does the architecture of 221B Baker Street seem not only to accommodate but to anticipate Holmes' every camouflage need? WHERE can one get waxen busts of Jeremy Brett, preferably in bulk, this question purely research and Nick definitely didn't ask me to include it? Answers to some, fake lies to others and spaghetti for everyone await in this week's episode!The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘Borderline Canadian’ Cohen and Casey ‘Here To Talk About 'Stache Wax’ Hills, who also edits and produces it, and they're joined in this episode by Paul "Sherlofty Aspirations" Miller. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

Special Guest and Chairperson of the Kitty Winter Fanclub Liz Leighton STORMS THE PODCAST to discuss The Adventure of the Illustrious Client with us!Did you cats know there’s a show called Elementary? ‘CAUSE YOU’RE SURE GONNA AFTER THIS. Also we explore Victorian gaslighting, which has less to do with lampposts than you might think, how relationships are weird and the original binder full of women!Free e-text of this week’s story: http://gutenberg.net.au/ebooks01/0100291.txtFree audio of this week’s story: https://librivox.bookdesign.biz/book/111099The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘The Most Dangerous Grunt In London’ Cohen and Casey ‘The Big Book of Ming’ Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

Special Guest and Chairperson of the Kitty Winter Fanclub Liz Leighton STORMS THE PODCAST to discuss The Adventure of the Illustrious Client with us!Did you cats know there’s a show called Elementary? ‘CAUSE YOU’RE SURE GONNA AFTER THIS. Also we explore Victorian gaslighting, which has less to do with lampposts than you might think, how relationships are weird and the original binder full of women!Free e-text of this week’s story: http://gutenberg.net.au/ebooks01/0100291.txtFree audio of this week’s story: https://librivox.bookdesign.biz/book/111099The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘The Most Dangerous Grunt In London’ Cohen and Casey ‘The Big Book of Ming’ Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

Hahaha what do you mean, listener, OF COURSE this was all recorded in the same session, why would the world DISSOLVING AROUND US impact our ability to maintain a recording schedule? Nick was simply inside an old pineapple can for the first half, as is the way of his people!Anyway THERE'S BEEN A MURDER at the Abbey Grange, but ALL IS NOT AS IT SEEMS, even though it SEEMS THERE WAS A MURDER Okay it's--it's PARTIALLY as it seems??? SOME things are as they seem, including the Sinister Silver Swan, our Fantasy Dad Rosters and everyone's favorite good-time club bop, an extended discussion about moral and ethical philosophy! ALSO hear about a real-life steampunk Ocean’s 11 jailbreak heist that very nearly happened!Free e-text of this week's story: https://sherlock-holm.es/stories/pdf/a4/1-sided/abbe.pdfFree audio of this week's story: https://librivox.org/the-return-of-sherlock-holmes-by-sir-arthur-conan-doyle-2/PODS & ENDS: Omnibus Episode 79: The Saint Helena Submarine PlotThe Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘It Always Comes Back To Crabs’ Cohen and Casey 'Boom, Church of England' Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!

***CW: This episode contains a brief instance of airhorns and also of Hello! Ma Baby***It was only a matter of time. A young lawyer learns he’s a murderer in the midst of his commute: ARE WE NOT OBLIGATED TO ASSUME IT WAS WHILE LISTENING TO THIS VERY PODCAST?Lestrade tries on a new look: THAT OF SOMEBODY WHO DOESN’T SUCK AT HIS JOB.Nick and Casey bring you: UNSOLICITED FACTS ABOUT FAMOUS MUSICALS including SECRET VOICE-DOUBLING and the SHOCKING SHARED ORIGINS OF SWEENEY TODD AND FIDDLER ON THE ROOF.We also do our best to thoroughly intimidate BELOVED DERANGED MERCHANT-PRINCE Brad Kefauver, who has had it TOO GOOD FOR TOO LONG.PODS & ENDS:-Firemen: they’re hunky, and it’s safe to say they would be with British accents too.-Creative Home Engineering, for all your secret passage, oubliette and hidden laboratory needs-House of Leaves, Mark Z. DanielewskiFree e-text of this week’s story: https://sherlock-holm.es/stories/pdf/a4/1-sided/norw.pdfFree audio of this week’s story: https://librivox.org/the-return-of-sherlock-holmes-by-sir-arthur-conan-doyle/The Final Podblem is cohosted by Nicholas ‘Muscle Gay Genie’ Cohen and Casey 'Flawless Cake Of I-Told-You-So' Hills, who also edits and produces it. Find it and more of our shows on the Semiautomagic Podcast Network at semiautomagicinc.com, follow our twitter @TheFinalPodblem, email us at [email protected] and find our Patreon at patreon.com/semiautomagic, where you can become a patron to support the show, get early episodes and exclusive content!