Episode 186: Early bird, night owl, or accumulated feelings?

This is a special episode that was recorded three years ago and that was on my Psychospiritual Podcast, about Aware Parenting and homeschooling. If you know Chiara Rossetti and haven't heard the news yet, I invite you to pause and have a friend close before reading more..... ...... ...... ...... Chiara is no longer with us. If you knew her, I'm sending so much love to you, however you're feeling now. Chiara was an Aware Parenting instructor who lived and breathed Aware Parenting. She was an attachment play genius. I shared about her, the profound effect she had on the Aware Parenting community, and my friendship with her on my social media recently. She and her children had the most amazing Aware Parenting and natural learning journey. She supported so many parents with Aware Parenting and attachment play in particular. She supported so many Aware Parenting instructors. We had talked for years about creating an attachment play book some day, and had reconnected with that again recently. I am so deeply sad and will miss her so much. I felt so called to share this episode with you, where she shares about how she came across Aware Parenting (when her son was waking up every 45 minutes), and then talked about her journey with Aware Parenting and Natural Learning (this was part of a series of podcasts on AwP and homeschooling). She also shared about sleep, and teens. So much of what she said is so poignant. If you want to watch the FB live we did on attachment play together that we mention at the end of the episode, you can find it here: https://www.facebook.com/100063796862144/videos/246519440294072 So much love to you. xoxoxo

In this episode, I share listeners' questions and my answers, for toddlers of one year old to children who are seven years old. The questions include: "How can I help my one year old release big feelings before and during sleep without making her feel powerless? Is me holding her helpful?" "I'd love to hear you talk about breastfeeding to sleep and night wakings and night weaning. (My little one is 15 months old.)" "Why is my 23 month old breastfed co-sleeping toddler waking at 12, 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8 am?" "How can I help our three year old who needs to be in a certain position with a certain parent in order to sleep, and cries if that changes (while also supporting her to stay securely attached)?" "I feel resentful lying next to my 4 year old to help her go to sleep and I also have a baby. What can I do?" "What would you suggest as a gentle encouragement for a 5 year old to begin sleeping in their own bed so I can get up early before he does? "I'm a nanny and the seven year old I look after in the evenings refuses to go to bed when I am baby sitting and her mum goes out." If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 The live round of this year's Sound Sleep and Secure Attachment with Aware Parenting Course is open. Details are here: https://marionrose.samcart.com/products/sound-sleep-and-secure-attachment-with-aware-parenting-course/ The reduced fee code is on my social media posts. You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I share listeners' questions and my answers, for babies 3 months to 12 months old. The questions include: "Can babies get nightmares/night terrors as young as 3 months?" "How do I support my baby when he gets the wriggles?" "Should I be putting my 9 mth old In her own cot?" "Do we have to co sleep?" "Do you think the whole family should sleep together?" "For day time naps do you recommend she continues sleeping on us or next to us for a long time? Unless in her pram or car we don’t have luck with her sleeping on her own." "What are you meant to do throughout the entire night to encourage bub to sleep throughout the whole night?" "Our 10 month old twins scream 40 mins after bedtime." If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 Doors are open to the live round of this year's Sound Sleep and Secure Attachment with Aware Parenting Course. Codes for early bird prices are on my social media. Details are here: https://marionrose.samcart.com/products/sound-sleep-and-secure-attachment-with-aware-parenting-course/ You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk about the chronotypes of the early bird and the night owl. I also explain how you can differentiate each of these from the effects of accumulated healing-feelings. I also share about the possibility that both chronotypes and accumulated feelings can be happening, and what you can do it this is the case. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 The live round of this year's Sound Sleep and Secure Attachment with Aware Parenting Course is starting soon, and there will be early bird reduced fee places! You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk about the most common reason why babies and toddlers: wake up with the slightest noise or movement; wake up after one sleep cycle; wake up crying; are restless at night; wake frequently; appear to resist sleep; take a long time to go to sleep. If you're walking on eggshells to make sure they don't wake up, this might interest you. I explain how quiet and stillness can indicate relaxation or mild dissociation, why that's important for sleep, and how you can differentiate between the two. I share about needs-feelings and healing-feelings, and why being able to differentiate between these is also vital to understanding why it's really common for babies and children to be mildly dissociated before sleep. I talk about why we don't use the terms 'soothing' and 'self-soothing' in Aware Parenting, and how this relates to understanding mild dissociation. I also share why and how listening to healing-feelings before sleep leads to deep relaxation and restful sleep. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 The live round of this year's Sound Sleep and Secure Attachment with Aware Parenting Course is starting soon, and there will be early bird reduced fee places! You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk to Maru Rojas again. Maru is an Aware Parenting instructor in the UK and is originally from Mexico. She was a guest on the podcast on episode 139, also talking about sleep. If you haven't listened to that episode, I highly recommend listening to it after this one. Maru shares her journey of sleep with her daughter and son, as she gradually increased the depth of her understanding and practice of Aware Parenting. In particular, she talks about her daughter's night waking and moving all around the bed as a toddler. She shares how she stopped breastfeeding at night, and about her increasing awareness of the surprising control pattern that was the lynchpin for more sleep. She also shares more about the huge difference in sleep between her daughter and her son, with whom she started practicing Aware Parenting with at birth, alongside having much more understanding and experience with Aware Parenting by that time. Maru is also a teacher of Elimination Communication and offers courses and 1:1 consultations in both EC and Aware Parenting. You can find out more about her work and can contact her at: https://parenttogether.co.uk/ and https://www.instagram.com/_maru.rojas_/

In this episode, I share why Aware Parenting doesn't include the terms 'overtired', 'wake windows', and 'sleep regression', and what we perceive is going on when these terms are used. Because Aware Parenting has such different ways of understanding what's going on with sleep, it doesn't use a lot of terminology commonly used in other parenting paradigms. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk about the three ingredients for restful sleep. The first is well-known, the second is less well-known in this culture, and the third is often not recognised at all. I also explain the three different ways to bring about calmness before sleep, and why two of those only lead to superficial calmness, which often leads to babies and children waking up easily and frequently. Then I share the third way, which leads to deep relaxation. This is a part of Aware Parenting, and I talk about why that way that leads to relaxed, restful and restorative sleep. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

This little mini episode continues on from the last episode on cultural beliefs in relation to sleep. I talk about how looking at sleep practices all around the world helps us understand biological needs and cultural practices. Babies and children vitally need sleep, so it's adaptive for there to be many ways to support them to be able to go to sleep in whatever climate and culture, but these different ways have consequences in other areas. There are three reasons I find it helpful to look at the wider cultural context with sleep: To see how sleep practices are related to climate, culture, etc. To get free from shame and guilt about what others might think if you choose your own way. To see clearly what you might hvae been told is from a cultural belief rather than what's most helpful for babies and children. I also talk about the three main ways for sleep to happen: With closeness - eg movement, feeding, etc. -> frequent night waking. Without closeness - eg. swaddling, stillness, etc -> baby wakes up but doesn't call out. Aware Parenting: Closeness and natural relaxation through release -> more relaxation and more restful sleep and longer sleep. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

I love looking at how cultural beliefs and practices affect parenting, and in this episode I explore this in relation to sleep for babies and children. I talk about The Continuum Concept book about the Yequana people, by Jean Liedloff, and how reading it affected me back in 1992. I explore how Classical Attachment Parenting was deeply influenced by Indigenous cultures in hot climates, and how parenting beliefs and practices were often quite different in cold climates. I share about how Aware Parenting aims to differentiate between parenting practices that are based on cultural beliefs around and practices that are based on innate needs and body wisdom. If you'd like my free PDF to learn more about sleep, secure attachment, emotional release and Aware Parenting, you can sign up for it here: https://marion-rose.myflodesk.com/ssgsvngo66 You can find out more about my work at www.marionrose.net You can also find me here: https://www.instagram.com/theawareparentingpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/ https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/ www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD