Seeing Death Clearly

Send us Fan MailGrief looks different for everyone, but society often places expectations on how people should mourn. Some losses receive more support than others, leaving people feeling that their grief doesn't matter. Creating space for honest conversations about death, loss, and healing can help people feel less alone.In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, death doula and funeral celebrant Jill McClennen talks with Seattle-based journalist Laura Jaye Cramer, creator of Candlelight Magazine, about changing the way people understand and talk about grief.After losing her father and brother in 2021, Laura experienced how differently people respond to death and loss. Some friends offered comfort and support, while others pulled away, unsure of what to say or do. These experiences helped shape her desire to create a place where people could share their stories without judgment.Jill and Laura explore the unspoken rules society places on grieving people, including the pressure to move on quickly or grieve in certain ways. They discuss how some losses, such as the death of a pet, grandparent, or someone who died by suicide, may receive less understanding or support. This can leave people questioning whether their grief is valid.Laura shares how Candlelight Magazine, launched in late 2024, is helping change these conversations through personal stories, science reporting, poetry, photography, and advice from grief professionals. Distributed mainly through funeral homes and other end-of-life settings, the magazine offers a thoughtful way to explore death, dying, loss, and the many ways people experience grief.This conversation encourages listeners to question their beliefs about grief, recognize that every loss matters, and consider how open conversations about death can support healing, compassion, and more conscious living.00:00 No Wrong Way00:13 Meet the Host01:37 Laura’s Story02:52 Launching Candlelight04:55 San Francisco Years05:35 Returning to Jersey06:48 Growing Up Unsafe08:05 Parenting After Trauma12:03 Control and Mortality14:58 Why Grief Feels Awkward16:21 Losses That Sparked It18:35 Inside the Magazine21:01 Finding Contributors22:46 Editorial Process Evolving23:22 Seasonal Issue Themes24:05 Complicated Grief Stories25:03 Making Grief Less Heavy26:06 Turning Loss Into Art28:17 Grief Beyond Death29:50 Pet Loss Validity32:27 Grief Hierarchy Debate35:15 Awkward Reactions Learned37:00 Suicide Loss And Humor39:40 Finding Safe Lifelines42:49 Crisis Resources And Hotlines44:31 Where To Find CandlelightWebsite is: https://waitingroompublishing.comCandlelight magazine via: https://waitingroompublishing.com/collections/candlelight Social: @waitingroompublishingSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailWhat happens to your digital life after you die? From family photos and social media accounts to passwords and online subscriptions, so much of our lives now exists online. But these digital assets are often overlooked when it comes to end-of-life planning.In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, death doula and funeral celebrant Jill McClennen talks with Niki Weiss, a digital thanatologist who studies how death, dying, and grief intersect with technology.After losing both of her parents to cancer, Niki experienced firsthand how overwhelming the responsibilities after a death can be, especially while grieving. Those experiences helped shape her interest in making end-of-life planning more accessible and less intimidating.Jill and Niki explore what happens to our digital lives after death, including who can access our accounts, what happens to our online belongings, and why planning ahead matters. They also discuss the growing use of artificial intelligence to recreate people who have died and the complicated questions this raises about grief, memory, and our relationships with those we've lost.Niki shares practical steps people can take to organize their digital lives, including setting up legacy contacts and making important information accessible to loved ones. She also explains why end-of-life planning can be viewed as a form of self-care and an act of kindness toward the people we leave behind.This conversation offers a thoughtful look at how technology is changing our experiences with death and grief, and why preparing for our digital afterlife deserves a place in our end-of-life plans.00:00 Death Is Indiscriminate00:11 Digital Afterlife Setup02:09 What Is Thanatology05:07 We Rent Our Data07:40 Biohacking Immortality Myth13:29 Niki’s Origin Story17:02 Sleep As Micro Death18:21 Grief Bots And Avatars20:34 Say It While Alive24:17 Pressure Testing Plans25:04 Why Planning Matters26:02 Digital Death Readiness26:49 Set Up Legacy Contacts28:30 Wills Trusts Beneficiaries30:06 Safe Deposit Box Risks31:56 Build a Crucial Doc Box34:41 Physigital Password Strategy35:41 Funeral Costs and Choices37:12 Avoid Dying Intestate39:20 Family Action Checklist41:15 Overwhelm and Emotional Load41:57 Wrap Up and Where to FindMy episode on Niki’s podcast https://open.spotify.com/episode/0NIWQWH3tEsR7jWYsJlf22https://youtu.be/X7V1TyuGwFg?si=xmUh5vtXNHodbiDgwww.endevo.lifewww.finalplaybook.comwww.linkedin.com/in/nikiweissSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailWhat happens to someone who is grieving when the funeral is over and everyone else returns to their normal lives? Grief doesn't follow a schedule, and some of the hardest moments can come weeks or months after a death, when the support begins to fade.In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, death doula and funeral celebrant Jill McClennen talks with Kelly Edmondson, a nurse and healthcare executive whose understanding of death and grief changed after the unexpected loss of her 28-year-old son, Darius. Despite spending more than 25 years working in healthcare, nothing could have prepared Kelly for losing her own child.Darius lived with epilepsy and died in his sleep from sudden unexpected death in epilepsy (SUDEP) in January 2023. Kelly shares what those first days and months were like, from managing the practical responsibilities that follow a death to facing the quieter moments when the reality of her loss began to settle in.She also talks about how her family found ways to continue remembering and celebrating Darius, especially around holidays and meaningful dates. Those experiences helped inspire Kelly to create Timely Presence, a grief support service designed to remind people they haven't been forgotten long after the funeral is over.Jill and Kelly discuss why ongoing grief support matters, how uncomfortable people can feel around someone who is grieving, and what friends, family members, and employers can do to offer meaningful support. Kelly shares her approach to showing up for grieving people, including why remembering someone's loved one and simply saying their name can make a difference.This conversation is a reminder that grief doesn't end when the funeral is over, and supporting someone through loss isn't just about being there in the beginning. It's about continuing to show up as they learn to live with the absence of someone they love.Thetimelypresence.comhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/kelly-edmondson/@the.kellyedmondson on IG00:00 Shock of the News01:13 Meet Kelly Edmondson02:35 A Nurse Becomes the Patient04:15 Remembering Darius05:45 Understanding SUDEP07:45 From Logistics to Silence11:47 Mother's Day Turning Point13:59 Gifts That Keep Showing Up16:03 Building Timely Presence17:39 How the Service Works21:00 Workplace Grief Support23:27 Arise Cohort for Purpose24:11 Why Grief Can't Stay Home25:18 Holidays and Loss26:13 Christmas Trip Ritual27:24 Grief Attack and Rescue28:51 Reframing Joyful Traditions30:14 Avoiding Grief Stagnation32:09 Three Rs of Support35:34 Learning to Show Up39:56 Say Their Name43:50 Infant Loss and Future Grief46:26 Love Means Loss47:01 Where to Find KellySupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailDeath is everywhere in movies, television, and the news, yet talking about our own mortality is something many people avoid. Why are we so fascinated by death while also being afraid of it? And could facing the reality of dying help us live more meaningful lives?In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, death doula and funeral celebrant Jill McClennen talks with psychologist and writer Liz Scott, author of You're Going to Die But Not Me, about death anxiety, grief, end-of-life planning, and the complicated emotions that come with facing our mortality.Liz shares the personal experiences that shaped her relationship with death, including the loss of her husband at home with hospice care, witnessing her mother's peaceful death despite their difficult relationship, and facing her own breast cancer diagnosis. These experiences challenged her beliefs about dying, what might happen after death, and whether it is possible to move from fear toward acceptance.Jill and Liz explore why people often avoid conversations about death, even when they understand the importance of preparing for the end of life. They discuss living wills, the role of death doula work, and how being present with someone who is dying can change the way we think about our own lives.They also talk about the simple but meaningful ways we can comfort someone at the end of life, including gentle touch, familiar music, and genuine human connection. Liz shares her interest in panpsychism, the idea that consciousness may be a basic part of the universe, and research into how psychedelics may help reduce the fear of dying, particularly for people facing terminal illness.Throughout the conversation, Jill and Liz reflect on grief, healing, legacy, and the idea of memento mori, a reminder that life is temporary. Rather than allowing that awareness to create more fear, they explore how it can encourage conscious living, deeper relationships, and a greater appreciation for ordinary moments.This conversation offers an honest, thoughtful, and sometimes humorous look at death, dying, and what it means to be alive. It invites listeners to question their own beliefs, become more comfortable talking about mortality, and consider how accepting the reality of death might help them live more fully.00:00 Facing Mortality Fears01:07 Meet Liz Scott01:53 Obsessed Yet Avoidant03:10 Death as a Companion04:42 Memento Mori Mindset06:05 Death Doula Perspective09:40 Loss and Cancer Catalyst13:15 Afterlife and Being Good15:28 Crisis Support and Growth19:27 Choosing Compassion Over Rage21:16 Protecting the Kids22:06 Why Write About Death24:25 Humor at the Bedside26:43 Making Death Feel Normal30:39 Writing to Reach People32:14 Psychedelics and Panpsychism35:14 Psychedelic Research and Access37:57 Where to Find the BookYou're Going To Die But Not Me! Book Link https://a.co/d/0e635K3PSUBSTACK: https://lizscottwriter.substack.comWEBSITE: www.lizscottwriter.comSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailGrief isn't just something we experience when someone dies. It can show up during major life changes, the end of relationships, aging, and losses we may not even recognize as grief. Learning to acknowledge these experiences can help us better understand our emotions and find ways to move through them.In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, host Jill McClennen, a death doula and funeral celebrant, talks with Nikki Smith, also known as Nikki the Death Doula, a death doula and grief coach in Columbus, Ohio.Together, they explore the many forms of grief, including pet loss, breakups, perimenopause, empty nesting, and changes in our bodies and identities. They discuss disenfranchised grief, losses that often go unrecognized or unsupported, and the lasting impact of the COVID-19 pandemic, including missed milestones, disrupted funerals, and the experiences of healthcare workers.Jill and Nikki also talk about anger as a natural part of grieving, why families sometimes struggle when someone they love is dying, and how the media can create unrealistic expectations about death and grief.A meaningful part of their conversation focuses on the difference between accepting a loss and simply acknowledging that it is happening. They explore how recognizing the reality of a situation, even when we aren't ready to accept it, can be an important part of healing.They also discuss the value of end-of-life planning, how preparing ahead can ease some of the burden on loved ones, and why we can't plan for or control everything that happens at the end of life.00:00 Acknowledge Not Accept00:16 Meet The Host01:21 Introducing Nikki Smith02:33 Grief Coaching Training03:38 Grief Beyond Death04:36 Perimenopause Body Changes08:19 Aging And Identity Shifts11:25 Disenfranchised Life Grief12:45 COVID Assumptive World Loss17:00 Anger In Grief18:26 Move Anger Through Body19:59 Family Conflict And Denial22:04 Saying Death Out Loud23:40 Denial and Euphemisms25:10 Movies vs Real Dying26:31 Funerals and Real Grief27:49 Good Grief Podcast30:16 Fears Dementia and ALS31:28 Losing Mom Suddenly34:00 Death Planning Limits36:39 Talk It Through Family39:16 Resources and Wrap Upwww.nikkithedeathdoula.comhttps://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/nikkideathdoula/https://www.facebook.com/NikkitheDeathDoulaMy episode with Nikki on her podcast Good Grief https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/nikkideathdoula/episodes/177--Death-Doula-Showdown--My-conversation-with-Jill-of-End-of-Life-Clarity-e3ppe9u/a-acu2iiuSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, Sarah Vosburg shares the complicated reality of caregiving, grief, memory care, and learning to give herself grace for decisions made during an incredibly difficult time. Caring for a parent with dementia can mean making difficult choices without knowing whether there is a “right” answer.Host Jill McClennen, a death doula and funeral celebrant, talks with Sarah, a retired school psychologist and author of Who Will Name the Bees? Sarah cared for her mother as dementia changed their relationship and eventually led to nine difficult months in memory care before her mother died in 2008.Sarah shares some of the choices she faced as her mother’s needs changed, including concerns about unsafe driving, questions about her mother’s marriage, hospitalization, medication, and the challenges of navigating memory care. She describes caregiving as an “amateur business,” because families are often expected to make life-changing decisions without training or a clear roadmap.After her mother died, Sarah began writing down memories that came to her during the night. Those memories eventually became a memoir weaving together caregiving, family history, poetry, grief, and the unusual conversation that inspired the book’s title.Jill and Sarah also talk about caregiver burnout, loneliness, healing after caregiving ends, and the role writing can play in preserving a person’s legacy. Their conversation connects with many of the questions found in death doula work and end-of-life planning: how families care for one another through dying and loss, how grief changes over time, and how facing mortality can become part of conscious living.Sarah’s story is a reminder that caregiving rarely comes with perfect answers—and sometimes healing begins with looking back at what happened with a little more grace.00:00 Feeling Less Alone00:17 Meet the Host and Guest01:46 Sarah’s Background02:36 Why Name the Bees06:22 Beekeeping Lore and Loss08:43 Turning Grief Into a Memoir11:34 Writing Process and Structure15:54 Publishing and Timeline16:19 Cancer, Chemo, and Dementia18:24 Memory Care and Hard Decisions23:35 Caregiving Frustrations24:59 Memory Care Failures26:33 Grace and Hindsight27:33 Audiobook Family Voices28:21 Taking Away the Keys31:11 Stop Arguing Dementia33:28 Panini Generation Pressure36:37 Caregiver Burnout and Loneliness38:44 Finding Yourself Again41:22 Book Links and Bee Names43:07 Closing Thanks and Timehttps://www.sarahvosburgh.comwhowillnamethebees.comSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailWhat could end-of-life care look like if caring for people who are dying became more of a community responsibility?In this episode, Jill talks with nurse Hannah Fowler about small, community-based homes for people at the end of life and the role these spaces can play for people who may not have family, caregivers, or a safe place to die.Hannah shares how her work in nursing and hospice eventually brought her to the Center for Conscious Living & Dying in Asheville, now called Emberlight. She and Jill talk about the value of keeping these homes small and rooted in their communities, as well as Jill’s involvement in creating a similar three-bed home in Philadelphia.They also get into some of the harder questions surrounding this work. How do death doulas charge for care when so much of what they provide is presence, time, reassurance, and education? Why are some hospice organizations hesitant to work alongside doulas, while others are finding ways to collaborate?Hannah shares some of what she learned from being part of a community caring for people who were dying, including how the model supported not only residents, but volunteers, caregivers, and hospice professionals.The conversation also explores the personal side of doing this work—trauma, triggers, boundaries, shadow work, and the ways being close to death can bring us face-to-face with parts of ourselves we may otherwise avoid.Hannah now brings these experiences into her work through the School of the Red Skywalker, where she offers community circles, mentorship, education, and leadership support focused on creating healthier ways of caring for ourselves and one another.00:00 Letting Go of Perfection01:26 Meet Hannah Faller02:47 Starting a Community Home04:33 Charging for Presence08:28 Emberlight Model10:13 Hospice and Doula Bridge11:59 Volunteer Firekeeping Care16:25 Overnight Staffing Reality18:57 Building Volunteer Community20:09 Finding Connection and Belonging22:13 Separation and Meaning23:58 Shadow Work at Bedside25:08 Death as Catalyst27:39 Triggers and Limits29:29 Loving Activation31:11 Bridging Spirit and Shadow33:29 Choosing Hard Experiences37:06 Adaptations and Integration38:34 Witnessing Without Judgment39:35 Numbing and Forgiveness41:49 Red Skywalker Offerings44:16 Ripple Effects and Rebuilding46:53 Ways to Work Together48:00 Closing Thanks and Ripples https://[email protected] the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, I talk with psychology professor Dr. Anya Schultz, who teaches a course on the Psychology of Death and Dying. Her classroom gives students permission to explore subjects many of us are taught to avoid, often leading them to question their assumptions about death, grief, funerals, and what it means to say goodbye.Anya shares some of the exercises she uses with her students, including writing goodbye letters, imagining their own deaths, creating funeral programs and eulogies, and using the Go Wish card game to think about what matters most at the end of life.We also talk about the expectations we place on grief and how easily those expectations can make someone wonder whether they are grieving “correctly.” Our conversation expands beyond death to the many other losses we experience throughout life—changes in relationships, identity, health, roles, and the future we thought we would have.We explore why children benefit from honest, age-appropriate conversations about death rather than being completely shielded from it, and how the language adults use can shape a child’s understanding of loss.Anya also shares how her own experiences with caregiving, motherhood, illness, and having a daughter with cystic fibrosis have influenced the way she approaches death and uncertainty.Throughout our conversation, we come back to something at the heart of Seeing Death Clearly: talking openly about death isn’t only about preparing for the end of life. It can help us better understand loss and change, show up for the people we love, and think more intentionally about how we want to live while we’re here.00:00 Societal Grief Scripts00:18 Podcast Setup and Guest02:26 Inside the Death and Dying Class03:57 Aha Moments and Goodbye Letters07:12 Real Feelings Versus Expectations12:18 Grief Beyond Death14:18 Talking to Kids About Death17:52 Parenting With Illness Reality22:15 Avoidance Religion and Meaning26:39 Celebrating Life at Funerals27:44 Why Rituals Matter28:46 Funerals Are Evolving29:38 Living Wakes and Parties31:17 Grief Before Death34:12 Caregiving Reality Check35:55 Finding Beauty in Death37:57 Life Cycles and Seasons39:39 Students Plan Their Funerals42:46 Death and Rebirth Meditation45:38 Fears About the Process46:43 Caregiver Worries and Illness48:02 Closing and Contact [email protected] the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, I’m joined by writer and father of six Steve Beal Sr. for a conversation about family stories, grief, faith, and what we can learn when we take the time to really listen to the people who came before us.Steve shares how traveling with his mother to New Brunswick, Canada, to visit aging relatives eventually led him to begin recording the stories and experiences that would become a book about family, memory, and what he calls “generation jumping”, intentionally connecting with older generations and preserving their stories before they are lost.We talk about what happened when Steve brought his aunt back to the family farm and how being in that familiar place brought memories and stories back to the surface. We also talk about the stories our relatives tell over and over, why those repetitions can mean something different after someone dies, and how laughter and grief can exist right alongside each other.Steve and I also discuss what our children learn by watching us care for aging family members, the importance of making room for deeper conversations, and the awareness that we don’t always have as much time with the people we love as we think we do.Faith is also an important part of Steve’s story. He shares how Christian hope has shaped the way he understands death and grief, including his experiences with family funerals, while still leaving room for the sadness and mourning that come with losing someone we love.At the heart of our conversation is something simple: ask the questions, listen to the stories, spend the time, and pay attention to the people you love while they are still here.00:00 Intentionality Matters00:15 Meet Jill and Steve02:52 How the Book Began05:39 New Brunswick Roots06:46 From Sports to Spirit10:43 Publishing and Purpose14:04 Taking Elders Home19:13 Hope and Grief22:20 Grandmother Funeral Memory23:34 Hymns and Poetry24:23 Celebration Amid Loss25:23 Laughs at Funerals26:04 Bible on Grief28:05 Dad’s Wake Stories31:34 Record Family History33:21 Modeling Care for Elders36:26 Questions for Grammy41:07 Nature and God Connection44:25 Where to Find SteveBlog: 1inawesomewonder.comYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SteveBealSrSubstack: https://substack.com/@inhumbleadorationGeneration Jumping on Amazon: https://a.co/d/09QBc3onSupport the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok

Send us Fan MailWhen Lila Glasoe Francese’s sister Carolyn was diagnosed with glioblastoma in 2015, life changed quickly. Carolyn underwent surgeries and a trial treatment before dying 13 months later at just 46 years old, leaving behind a seven-year-old son and a family learning how to live with an enormous loss.In this episode of Seeing Death Clearly, Lila joins death doula and funeral celebrant Jill McClennen for a conversation about what grief actually looks like over time, not as something we simply move through and leave behind, but as something that continues to become part of our lives.Lila shares what it was like to lose her sister, help raise Carolyn’s son, and redefine what family looked like alongside her husband and brother-in-law. Now, a decade after Carolyn’s death, grief can still appear unexpectedly through milestones, memories, scents, songs, and other reminders that bring the past immediately into the present.Jill and Lila also talk about our culture’s discomfort with sadness and the pressure people can feel to be “okay” after loss. They explore why we need more honest conversations about illness, dying, caregiving, and grief and the importance of finding the people who are willing to show up and help when life becomes overwhelming.Writing became one of the ways Lila processed her own experience. What began with journaling eventually grew into her books, The Situation: A Radical Journey Through Sisterhood and Life Amplified: The Search for Resilience After Loss. Sharing her story also opened the door for other people to share losses they had been carrying, demonstrating how storytelling can create connections around experiences that are often kept private.The conversation also explores legacy, community, family, and what loss can teach us about the things we spend our lives accumulating compared with the people and relationships that ultimately matter most.At the heart of this episode is something Jill has learned through many conversations with guests over the years: grief doesn’t simply end. We learn how to carry what we’ve lost while continuing to live, love, connect, and make meaning in the life that is still here.00:00 Grief Changes You01:51 Meet Lila and Her Story02:27 Glioblastoma and Writing Through Loss06:44 Sharing Stories Heals11:00 Triggers and Sense Memories15:17 Milestones Without Her19:21 Redefining Family After Loss23:05 Find the Helpers26:58 Honest End of Life Talk36:49 Living Fully and Letting Go37:22 Stuff vs People42:51 Books and Closing Thoughtshttps://www.amazon.com/Situation-Radical-Journey-Thru-Sisterhoodhttps://www.instagram.com/lifeamplifiedbook/https://lifeamplifiedbook.com/the-situation-a-radical-journey-thru-sisterhood/Support the showSupport the show financially by doing a paid monthly subscription. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2092749/support Subscribe to Seeing Death Clearly and leave a 5-star review if you are enjoying the podcast. Don’t forget to check out my free workbook Living a Better Life. [email protected] https://www.endoflifeclarity.com/end-of-life-planning to learn more about End of Life Care planning and schedule a free 30-minute call.www.endoflifeclarity.comInstagramFacebook Facebook group End of Life Clarity CircleLinkedInTikTok