Here Comes the Sun

Send us Fan Mail@raquellegracie isn’t quite midlife (she’s not yet 40), but she has such an interesting story that I was overjoyed when she agreed to be a guest on Here Comes the Sun. Raquelle is a singer-songwriter and the creator of a music focus in the Algarve, Portugal, and her journey is full of lessons for anyone who has ever been told they weren’t good enough, or felt that they didn't fit.Raquelle entered the music industry at just 18. She went on The X Factor as part of a girl band and came fifth. From the outside it looked like the dream: touring, a move to America, a record deal. But behind the scenes, things were very different. Her experience in America wasn't quite what she hoped, she was dropped from the girl group, and then from her American record label before her album could launch, because she was considered too curvy for the band and for fame.It’s a painful story, and Raquelle is honest about how long it took to deal with. She didn’t fully process it until her mid-30s. She talks openly about that, and about where she is now: in a good place, with a very different relationship to her work, her body and her sense of worth.Along the way, Raquelle found yoga, meditation and a way to heal that gave her a new way of looking at life. We talk about how important it is to have a purpose, and how it changed things for her. Having raised children, she also reignited her passion for music, and she describes how scary it was to step back into the industry after time away.One of the most powerful parts of our conversation is about what it’s really like to stop performing. When the applause ends, so does the high, and Raquelle explains that those highs aren’t necessarily real. It’s an honest and important look at the side of fame we rarely see.Raquelle is a big supporter of independent artists, and she is now using her experience to create an infrastructure for young and upcoming artists, particularly young women through @independentmusicacademy We talk about her retreats and the work she does to raise up new artists, and the impact is huge. In a part of the conversation that spans all ages, we also discuss how the new generation is changing what is and isn’t acceptable, and about how older women are no longer invisible. Raquelle's message is clear: take the risk, because it’s worth it. There will always be someone who doesn’t like what you do, but you have to ignore the noise. You can’t expect everyone to like it, and that’s okay.Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailHave we really come so far as women, only to find ourselves more exhausted than ever?In this episode of Here Comes the Sun, I'm joined by Giselle Goodwin PhD, published author, speaker, entrepreneur and mum of two, to explore the pressures women face trying to balance careers, family, relationships and the expectations we place on ourselves.Born in Canada and having also lived in the UK and Portugal, Giselle's work focuses on women, work and wellbeing. After experiencing burnout in her thirties while running two businesses and raising two children, she developed autoimmune conditions and found herself struggling to meet the seemingly endless expectations of what it means to be a successful woman.After selling her businesses in 2018, Giselle took a step back, which led her to research women and work, develop her career as a writer and ultimately publish her book, Can Women Really Have It All? We talk about why so many women feel they're constantly letting someone down, the invisible mental load of running a home and raising a family, and how the midlife generation is navigating careers, children, grandchildren and ageing parents while still feeling pressure to look good, stay fit and somehow keep everything together. We also explore traditional gender roles, why women's careers so often take a back seat when children arrive, the pressure to conform to beauty standards, and the importance of recognising just how far women have come - while acknowledging how much still needs to change.With a shared interest in the importance of being happy, we discuss the female happiness paradox, why having more choices doesn't necessarily mean having more time or greater wellbeing, and why supporting women requires more than simply telling them to practise self-care.And finally, we ask a question that feels particularly important as we move through midlife: What do you actually want from this next chapter of your life?This is an honest conversation about ambition, burnout, expectations and redefining success. Also, a reminder that perhaps the answer isn't to do more, but to question why we're expected to do so much in the first place.Because you don't have to do everything, be everything or have it all figured out to make this your best chapter yet.For more from Giselle, follow @gisellegoodwinwrites and visit gisellegoodwin.com to take The Women’s Third Job Audit. This free tool identifies the invisible work we do every day, helps us recognise just how much you’re carrying, and where we need more balance and support. And also check out Giselle's fantastically insightful book Can Women Really Have It All? on Amazon and Audible. Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Here Comes the Sun, I’m joined by Susannah Schofield OBE for one of the most open, honest and emotional conversations we’ve had.Susannah has had an incredibly successful career. She spent almost 20 years at Royal Mail, ultimately becoming Commercial & Innovation Director, has built and led businesses, and is currently Director General of the Direct Selling Association. She was also awarded an OBE in 2015 for her services to small businesses, women and young people.Susannah is now turning her attention to a virtual members' club for navigating life's chapters - @noircommunity_  Noir offers access to experts including divorce specialists, grief counsellors and others who can help with the many practical and emotional challenges that come with starting a new chapter. Susannah is also the co-author of Encore: The best is yet to come, an honest account of finding love again later in life and why the best chapter might be the one you haven't written yet. *But behind the career success is a story of relationships, resilience, motherhood, change, difficult decisions and ultimately finding the confidence to ask: What do I actually want from my life?In 2020, during lockdown, Susannah suffered a serious neck injury and found herself in hospital at a time when nobody could visit her. Being completely alone gave her something she hadn't had for a long time - space to think.It made her question what she wanted, who she was and what her life really looked like.At the same time, lockdown meant that Susannah and her husband of 20 years were living apart - Susannah in the Algarve and her husband in the UK. That physical distance brought a realisation: perhaps they had grown apart, and perhaps life was actually easier apart.For Susannah, it became an opportunity to review everything and discover something incredibly powerful: she would be OK on her own.We talk openly about divorce and the enormous complexity of making that decision - particularly when you've built a life together, have children, shared finances and a familiar lifestyle. We talk about how your partner can become such a huge part of your identity and routine that changing that can feel enormous.Susannah also talks about marrying her first husband at just 18, how that relationship shaped her, and how her own experiences ultimately influenced the work she has done supporting women - particularly women returning to work after domestic abuse.We explore the challenges faced by working mothers, financial independence and why being financially trapped in a relationship is something she wants women to avoid. We talk about the example we set for our children and why independence can be one of the most motivational things we can give them.And then there is everything that comes after the decision.The guilt.The friendships that disappear because people don't know what to say.The challenge of dating again in later life and wondering where everyone else has gone.Blended families. Finances. Children. Grief. Starting again.And the realisation that starting again doesn't necessarily mean starting from scratch.We also talk about something that comes up again and again in my work: friendship: how friendships can change as we change and how some people are in our lives for a reason, some for a season and some for a lifetime.And how, as we get older, there can be a confidence that comes from understanding yourself better - knowing what you want, what you don't want and being much less willing to pretend to be someone you're not.Susannah talks honestly about the emotional impact of divorce, including the guilt she felt about ending her marriage and the loneliness that followed. We talk about the importance of allowing ourselves to show emotion and of having people around us with whom we can be vulnerable.And we talk about the freedom that can come with midlife.More time.More self-awareness.More understanding of who you are.Less pretending.And perhaps, finally, the courage to ask yourself what you actually want.The conversation is raw, honest and emotional. Because that's what Here Comes the Sun is really about.Not having everything figured out. Not pretending life is always easy.But sharing the stories of women who have been through difficult things, found their way through them, and discovered that there really can be sunshine on the other side. ☀️*Find out more and follow Susannah @susannahschofieldobe and @noircommunity_Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: @elizabeth_hammond_mscFollow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailAre your friends really supporting you - or quietly holding you back?In this episode of Here Comes The Sun, I’m joined by my friend Annalie Howling, author of Unapologetic, for a very honest conversation about female friendship, authenticity, growth and what happens when the people closest to us don't support the changes we make.Annalie is a certified high-performance coach, EMDR specialist, trauma-informed practitioner and Certified Organisational Relationship Systems Coach, working with individuals, couples, teams and organisations.Her book is about turning pain into power, letting go of shame and learning to choose yourself without apologising for who you are. She's also a fellow podcaster - Happy After Podcast offers stories about life after loss, betrayal and starting over.We talk about our own friendship and some of the challenges women face when friendships evolve - particularly in midlife, when so much can change. But as Annalie is younger than me, we also explore why these challenges aren't confined to any particular age.One question Annalie asks really stayed with me:Is it support… or is it surveillance?We talk about what happens when you change your career, relationship, lifestyle or simply become more yourself, and your friends aren't comfortable with it. How do you know when a friend is genuinely looking out for you and when they're trying to keep you where you're familiar to them?We also talk about being authentic, letting go of the need to be liked by everyone and why we shouldn't have friendships where we have to pretend to be someone we're not.Annalie shares some of her own powerful story, including experiences of abuse, estrangement from her parents, divorce, anxiety and self-harm, and how those experiences ultimately shaped the work she does today.We talk about why crying isn't something we should be ashamed of, how we can begin to repair ourselves, and how we can help each other to heal and rebuild.And, of course, we finish with a quick-fire round - because serious conversations need a few laughs too!If you've ever questioned a friendship, felt unsupported by someone close to you, or wondered whether you can truly be yourself around the people in your life, this conversation is for you.We're not broken. Sometimes we're simply becoming someone new.Follow Annalie @annaliehowling and @happyafterpodFollow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: @elizabeth_hammond_mscFollow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailOne of the reasons I created Here Comes the Sun was to help women.To share stories. To share information. To make sense of some of the things we experience in midlife.And even when the stories I share are difficult or emotional, I want you to leave each episode feeling uplifted, hopeful and positive about what’s possible.Today’s episode is a follow-on from my previous conversation about self-awareness. If you haven't listened yet, please do, because, this episode, I’m assuming you’ve already started doing the work from the previous episode. By now you are becoming aware of your own tendencies and identifying those moments when you feel insecure, anxious, worried or stuck.Once you've done this, you start to realise that so much of what you tell yourself every day is just your own internal script.“I’m a worrier.”“I can’t change.”“I’m always late.”“People always let me down.”“I’m just not confident.”“They don’t like me.”Some of these beliefs and tendencies may have developed from our experiences and, at times, they may even be useful.But others?They’re simply patterns we’ve practised for a very long time.And the most empowering part is that they don't have to stay that way forever. You can rewrite the script. One of the techniques I talk about is changing the way we describe what we're experiencing.Instead of: “I am anxious", try saying "I'm noticing anxiety" or instead of: "they don't like me", Try: I'm having the thought that they don't like me". It sounds like a tiny change. But there is a difference between experiencing a thought or feeling and automatically treating it as a fact.That little bit of distance can give you the opportunity to observe it rather than simply become it.I also talk about meditation, breathwork and the physiological sigh, as well as using things like music, vision boards and mood boards to reinforce the mindset and identity you want to develop.Because what you do a lot of, you get really good at (both positive and less positive).And if you’ve spent years practising worry, insecurity or self-doubt, it makes sense that those states can feel familiar.But you can begin practising something different.A small change. Every day. Repeatedly.And gradually, you can start creating a different roadmap for how you see yourself and how you respond to the world.It’s your script. You don’t have to keep reading the same story. ☀️Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailWe can usually tell you a lot about the people around us. What they like, how they behave, what makes them happy or angry. But when I ask my clients a much simpler question - “Who are you?” - around 70% or more struggle to answer.What are your thoughts, feelings and emotional tendencies? What is the story you repeatedly tell yourself? What beliefs are quietly shaping the way you behave and the life you are creating?In this solo episode, I explore why we often spend so much time looking out at the world and so little time looking in, and why self-awareness may be one of the most powerful tools we have for change.I explain how our early experiences, childhood and environment can help create the foundations of our beliefs and behaviours. Some of these foundations may be uneven, but that doesn't mean they are permanent. Once you become aware of a pattern, you can question it, decide whether it still serves you, and begin to change it.From meditation and music to journalling, mindfulness and other emerging approaches such as neurofeedback and medically supervised psychedelic therapies, there are many ways to begin changing the patterns that have shaped us. I always try and take my own advice of course, and have completed meditation training, including during my two @drjoedispenza retreats, and am trying medically supervised psychedelics soon so watch this space for my review of that!Importantly, the thing to remember is that you are not your thoughts. You are not your beliefs. And you are not stuck with either.Self-awareness is vital and change comes with practice, repetition and time. It is entirely possible though, and I can help you to take the first step.Because, sometimes, the most powerful question you can ask yourself is simply:“Why do I think, feel and behave the way I do?”Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/

Send us Fan MailWelcome to Here Comes the Sun. In this very first episode, I open up about the experiences that shaped me, why I created this podcast, and what I hope it can offer women navigating midlife and beyond.I share my personal story of childhood trauma, loss and uncertainty - including the sudden death of my mother when I was just four, the disappearance of my older sister, the loss of my brother, and the impact those experiences had on the woman I have become.For years, I dealt with pain by doing what I knew best: working harder, achieving more and keeping busy. From a high-powered career in the City to becoming a coach and eventually studying applied neuroscience at King’s College London, my journey has been one of continually trying to understand myself, my experiences and, ultimately, the human brain.But this isn't an episode about being defined by trauma.It's about what happens when we begin to understand that our brains can change, that our emotional states aren't necessarily fixed, and that we can learn new ways of responding to the things life throws at us.I truly believe that difficult experiences don't have to define our future. in Here Comes the Sun you can expect accessible neuroscience, practical tools and techniques, conversations with women who have lived through extraordinary experiences, honest stories, exercise, habits, mindset, wellbeing - and plenty of humour along the way.This is a podcast about midlife, but it isn't about slowing down or looking backwards.It's about what comes next.Here Comes the Sun.Follow me on Instagram for more science-backed tips, techniques and advice to help you live a happier and more fulfilled midlife: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_hammond_msc/