S5: Ep 4 The Shapes, Forms and Paths of Love

When you're single it's easy to feel like you're moving through the world alone and unseen. Everyone else seems to have someone who is obligated to check in, show up and be there. And you, well, it's just your sad little lonesome self fighting all the battles, or so it seems. Recently, after another rejection email that made me want to throw a toddler-like tantrum and then go to bed for the rest of the day, I was reminded that the story many single people tell themselves isn't true.  As the sadness and disappointment started to rise throughout my body, my phone rang and it was a very good friend on the other line. She called out of the blue because she just felt like I needed it. During the course of our conversation I was reminded that sometimes the people who "run toward you" aren't romantic partners, they're your friends who call, listen, offer help and never let you forget that you matter. And most importantly, drill it into your thick skull that you're not alone. In this episode, I chit chat about what it really means to feel seen when you're single, how friendship anchors us in ways we don't expect and why choosing—and being chosen—by our people is one of the truest forms of love out there, all while making my go-to salmon bowl. 

Season 7! I'm back, baby!  In my little Paris kitchen, but this season I'm going back to my roots, just you and me. No guests, no filters, just honest conversations about what it really means to live (and be) alone. In this first episode, "Confronting the 'A' Word: Alone," I dig into the myth of being "okay" by yourself, the quiet nights, the loneliness that creeps in, and the beauty in sitting with it instead of scrolling it away, texting it away, or worse… To the listeners riding with me since 2018, I'm so happy you're here for this 7th season. If you're new here, welcome to the guild.

On this episode, I dined on pasta alla gricia with my guest Robin Davis while we spoke about the tricky balance of being in a relationship while cultivating and celebrating a solo life. Like me, Robin is an American in Paris. She's also a writer, producer, and a soon-to-be-published author!  I really enjoyed this episode because all of the prior guests I've spoken to this season were single and living alone, so it was interesting for me to get the perspective of someone who loves living alone but is in a happy and healthy romantic relationship.  During our conversation, I, surprisingly, found it hard to change my mindset about relationship milestones and expectations. While editing the episode I realized that I asked Robin different versions of the same question because it didn't fit the "proper steps" of a romantic relationship progression.  Robin so graciously reminded me that we write our own rules for our lives and the way we want to live it. As long as we live with integrity, are happy, and stay true to ourselves, we're on the right path regardless of what it looks like.   

Two episodes in one week! Look at meeeee! This is my way of apologizing for the long break between episodes. So all is forgiven now, yeah?  In this episode, I talk about how what started as a way to center myself (and, let's be honest, keep me off the streets and out of the wine bars) turned into something way bigger. I didn't realize it at the time, but every solo dinner I made was laying the foundation for the life I have now. Cooking for myself became more than just something to do to pass the time. It was how I learned to listen to what I truly needed, how I built self-trust, and how I started making decisions that aligned with the life I wanted, even when I didn't fully know what that life looked like yet. To my surprise, asking "what do I want for dinner?" was really me asking "what do I want for myself? For this life?" And that's when everything started to shift and evolve in ways I still kinda can't believe it has.

In this episode, I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with Tanisha Townsend, the founder of Girl Meets Glass, a wine lifestyle and education agency, and woman whose honesty, humor, and intelligence I admire deeply. I made fried chicken and mashed potatoes, she brought a beautiful bottle of Blanc de Blancs, and we got to talking! Tanisha brought her wit and no-nonsense attitude to the conversation in a way that left reflecting for days on some of the gems she dropped like, like: "Are you actually ready for what you really want?" and "If someone watched your habits for a week, would they reflect the life you say you want?" We also explore how living alone has given Tanisha the space to envision, build, and expand her business. It's not that she couldn't have achieved everything she has otherwise, but having the freedom and space (mentally and emotionally) to pour fully into herself and her vision made all the difference. I'm always moved and inspired by women who stand tall in their truth, show up fully, own their choices, and walk boldly toward the life they deserve.

Je parle français dans cet épisode. Pas le meilleur français et pas sans fautes, mais au moins je l'ai fait, et pour cela, j'en suis contente. Bien sûr, le fait d'avoir cette conversation avec une amie m'a beaucoup aidé. Dans cet épisode, "Pour que je m'aime encore", j'ai parlé à mon amie Farah, parisienne qui y est née et y a grandi. Elle est l'une des personnes les plus rayonnantes, réfléchies et profondes que j'ai pu rencontrer ici à Paris. Elle a raconté comment vivre seule pour la première fois dans sa trentaine lui a permis de s'épanouir et de s'aimer. De la décoration de son propre appartement avec beaucoup de couleurs à son rituel du dîner, en passant par le fait de se permettre de ressentir les flux et reflux de la vie, sans honte. C'était une conversation édifiante, amusante et honnête que j'ai beaucoup appréciée et et j'espère que ce sera la même chose pour toi.

In this week's episode of Dinner for One 2.0, I touch on the stigma surrounding solo living, especially for those of us in our 30s and beyond. There's still this outdated narrative that if a woman lives alone, she must be lonely, jaded, or just waiting for the right partner to "complete" her. But we know that's not true, right? Living alone doesn't equal loneliness, and it definitely doesn't mean your life is incomplete. In fact, living solo has made me so much more intentional with the people and experiences I invite into my life. I also talk about the Dinner for One Supper Club, which initially I thought would be a five dinner series and has turned into something much bigger. I created this monthly gathering as a space for single women living alone to connect, share meals, and celebrate the lives we're building. It's a reminder that living alone can actually inspire us to step out of our comfort zones and form deeper connections, the opposite of being lonely.   

My first guest of the season is my friend Jessica Hodge, an Australian sommelier living in Paris. This episode turned out to be quite an interesting one because I initially expected Jess to share similar feelings and ideas about creating and embracing a life of living alone, even if it's temporary. Well, listener, I was wrong. That said, I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation, and perhaps most importantly, I walked away with a valuable reminder about assumptions and expectations. It's crucial not to assume that the people close to you share the exact same ideas or feelings about everything. That doesn't mean your friendship is any less meaningful, it's quite the opposite actually! It means you have an opportunity to listen more and ask thoughtful questions. And you know what happens when you do that? You'll learn something new about that person and probably about yourself, which can, ultimately, help you evolve your own perspective as this conversation did with mine.

And I'm back!  To be honest, I thought the last episode published in June 2023 would be my last, but clearly I was wrong.  When I started this podcast in 2018, I was in my early 30s grappling questions: "How can I survive this colossal life shift?",  "What does survival even look like?" "Can I stay in Paris?" "Will I stay in Paris?" For all intents and purposes, I survived and did some cool shit. Some would even say I thrived. My podcast became pretty popular, I published my first book,  launched a monthly supper club, started doing pop-ups at different restaurants in Paris, interned in a restaurant kitchen, co-hosted a dinner in Milan, and even prepared my first private dinner. A lot has been going on.  Now as I approach a very significant age milestone, new questions have started to plague me:  "What does it mean to truly live?" and "How can I design a life that really resembles me?"   So this new version of Dinner for One, version 2.0, isn't revolving around a love story gone bad. Instead, it is about self-discovery and continuing to bloom where you're planted even when life's path looks a bit blurry. 

It's been a long time since the last episode, but I'm back! From my Parisian kitchen to your ears, join me on a trip down memory lane with some of the best moments from the Dinner for One podcast.