Hello Upended Earth

The Tennis Tragic #077 / The Retirement Plan / What will we do when it's all over?  When our body and spirit can no longer hold up to the rigors of life on tour?  This week, we learned that Gael Monfils will be working in wealth management; Stefanos Tsitsipas, meanwhile, will be starting the Society for the Preservation of the One-Handed Backhand.  Call him if you have a child with a one-hander.  He can help.  Meanwhile, Matte and David welcome former Upset Game World Number One Ian Macnider behind the curtain and onto the pod!  We discuss Ian's observations about the US Open thus far, and try to pry for secrets of the Upset Game - only to be rewarded with one sports cliche after another.  Alas.  We touch briefly on the fashion on display at the Open, from Alcaraz's nipple exposure to Naomi's Allen Iverson inspired walk-on outfit; discuss Alcaraz's dirge through five-setters in the latter hours, and imagine a tennis match that goes on literally forever.* Visit the Tragic Archive at ⁠tennistragic.com⁠* Play the Upset Game at ⁠upsetgame.com⁠* Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic brings you its 2026 US Open Draw Show, coming hot on the heels of a delightful Fan Week. We recap post-match expressions of platonic love, the joy and the struggle of fighting through the Qualifying round, and the lighthearted stakes-free practice matches that kick off an event filled with great intensity and meaning. Then, we provide comprehensive coverage of every quarter of both singles draws, identify interesting matchups, and remind the audience of our very deep connections and personal feelings about particular players. Did you know that Jack Kennedy is short and Lloyd Harris is tall? And we're not talking about Lloyd Harris the art collector here! * Visit the Tragic Archive at tennistragic.com* Play the Upset Game at upsetgame.com* Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #075 / The Diamond Episode / David and Matte get together to celebrate their 75th episode with the Tennis Tragic!  We revisit our dreams of making it to the Tennis Podcast Hall of Fame one day, while recognizing the reality that we're still just grinding away on the Futures Tour.  It is both a time for renewal and a time for long fade-outs in the world of professional tennis.  We take time to enjoy the recent emergence of Sara Bejlek, Alexandra Eala and Brandon Nakashima and discuss the dwindling relevance of doubles as a tennis medium and the Williams sisters continued engagement with the sport.  Finally, we check on Upset Game rankings and look forward to seeing Alcaraz's long flowing locks at the US Open, hoping to live in a Darkness-free world.* Visit the Tragic Archive at tennistragic.com* Play the Upset Game at upsetgame.com* Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #074 / Hello Upended Earth / Matte and David gather in advance of Wimbledon 2026 to discuss the state of the world, and how everything is forever changed. The Knicks won the championship. Zverev won a Major. Nothing will ever be the same. Also: Roger does a Tennis Tarot reading for the All-England Club, big things are predicted for Muchova and Eala, and big first titles are won by Robin Montgomery and Alejandro Davidovich Fokina. Finally, we debate the value of the question "What does [this victory] mean to you?" and grapple with Marketa Vondrousova's 4-year doping ban for a missed test, leading Matte to propose a socialist revolution.Visit the Tennis Tragic archive at www.tennistragic.comFollow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #073 / Is There a God? / Will the Knicks win a championship for the first time in 53 years? Are we entering Zverev's Second Age of Darkness, or is this actually the first? Do the outcomes we observe indicate the presence or absence of a higher power? Also: Mirra thanks herself, David has a religious experience, Matte casts a spell for Cobolli, and we re-examine the power and mystery of the Tennis Tarot.

The Tennis Tragic #072 / The King of Balls / David and Matte finally reconvene to discuss Marco Trungelliti's triumphant rise to glory (and fall to Jodar).  Roger draws a three-card Tennis Tarot spread.  Who is the real King of Balls?  Which Rising Star will arrive too soon?  And in a world where the Upset Game exists, will The Upset be the defining characteristic of the 2026 Roland Garros narrative?  We discuss Sinner's blessings, Alcaraz's curse, and Goffin's farewell, as well as progress on Tragic Tennis, and the Knicks juggernaut on the doorstep of glory.

The Tennis Tragic #071 / We Digress / Butch Buchholz. Who is Butch Buchholz? Matte and David discuss recent events, including Sabalenka stealing the Upset Game title for David at Indian Wells, the Tennis Robot picking the Opelka Servebot at Miami, and various other tangential topics. Johnny Five, Cooperstown Tarot, sycophancy, "chalk", the Upset Game demographic, Slay the Spire 2, SOUL.md, Peter Falk, the Matildas. Roger paints a picture of himself.

The Tennis Tragic #070 / The Crunching Sound / David and Matte leave voicemails for each other and accidentally make a podcast. Tsitsipas defeats Medvedev, which means nothing. David recounts his two weeks as a curling tragic. David and Matte discuss the merits of dentistry. Matte shatters his phone under a car while recording the sounds of his city. Mensik stuns Sinner, Denmark pretends it is a summery Scandinavian country, Atmane loses a match on the umpire's call, B-surnames have a big week, and Tiafoe goes Hard 75 but loses the Pear to Cobolli. David's back persists. A video game is coming. The green man flashes.

The Tennis Tragic #069 / Fading Into Her Prime / Matte and David find a little time to recap the 2026 Australian Open... eventually! But first... Matte tries to cast a spell, and fails to influence the #1 tennis tournament for vampires. David speculates about Sinner's potential dominance in ice tennis. We talk about cramp, ski jumping, the Super Bowl, the T20 World Cup, Serena's potential comeback, people who peaked in high school, how to build a better mop, and recap the latest Upset Game.

The Tragic Three reconvene for the first time in a long time, to pay tribute to Milos Raonic (sort of), marvel at Roger Federer (yet again), and unveil the 2026 Tragedy Watchlist as we move into the first Major of the year down under. We discuss Matte's unfortunate withdrawal from the One Point Slam, Alex's United Cup experience in Sydney, and David's brief dalliance with a 125 in Austin. We share our enjoyment of the One Point Slam (despite its ridiculous length) and our disdain for the (new, pointless) Battle of the Sexes.