334 – Shake It Up

The voice is right, and your face is no worse than it was, Sam. Also true for Alan and Shawn. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as our hobbit heroes are just what the Shire needs in the third of our five episodes on The Scouring of the Shire. Sam gets a bit tongue-tied; Farmer Exposition, uh Cotton, acts as bait; and the big ruffian makes a fatal mistake. We watch Sam adore Rosie (it’s not the ribbons in her hair), conclude that the ruffians haven’t read the Prologue, and learn how the Gaffer has been getting along. Also, we have no truck with Lotho.

It is rather a comic cavalcade that hosts this episode, but at least we’re not under arrest. Yet. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as Frodo and friends drive the two-feather Shirriff to exhaustion in the second of our five episodes on The Scouring of the Shire. The hobbits don’t let nothin’ get in the way as they deliver bad news to a ruffian, threaten to skewer him, and run him out of town. We discuss Frodo’s apparent pacifism, admire Tolkien’s love for trees, and meet the new boss: same as the old boss. Also, our resident cock-a-whoop swaggers it in a Philology Faire you never knew you needed.

It’s time for yet another party of special magnificence as The Prancing Pony Podcast releases its third highlight episode: it’s almost time for our vinyl box set and reunion tour. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they play listener-selected moments from the last eleventy-one episodes! From our visit to the butt store to the Witch-king’s visit to Minas Tirith, we review the funniest clips and the most dramatic readings. Despite the episode title, we still know nothing about cricket. Also, Darth Gollum finds your lack of fish disturbing.

No admittance between sundown and sunrise; except for Shawn, he can come and go as he pleases. Join The Man of the West as he welcomes back The Lord of the Mark as Frodo and friends return to a much-changed Shire in the first of five episodes on The Scouring of the Shire. Merry calls out a fellow Bucklander, Sam recognizes an old friend, and the hobbits are taken downtown for mug shots. We watch as Bill Ferny leaves the scene without a trace, complain about high taxes, and redraw Tolkien’s map of the Shire. Also, Shawn apparently has a cop story to tell us.

Tom talks in trochaic tetrameter today, triggering a trend. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South in his last episode (this season) as we answer listener questions in our 27th Questions After Nightfall! From popular misconceptions about Tolkien to keeping Gandalf on-task, from the nature of hope to the nature of Gothmog, our listeners pose questions — often in limerick form! Alan looks for any excuse to read Quenya, and we decide Norman Fell would have made a good Gildor.

Dark shapes and dreadful things are terrifying Barliman; James and Alan will try not to make it any worse. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as the hobbits conclude their visit to Bree in the final episode on Homeward Bound. Barliman is deeply confused about this whole king thing, the hobbits wonder exactly what Barliman means by “funny goings on”, and Gandalf makes it clear the Shire isn’t his circus and the hobbits aren’t his monkeys. We discuss land-use plans near Bree, and wonder if we should invest in real estate nearby. Also, The Lord of the Mark joins for a Philology Faire — Italy called and wants to talk to him.

Not all wounds can be healed, and not all episode descriptions can be clever. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we accompany Gandalf and the hobbits on their journey home from Rivendell in the first of our two episodes on Homeward Bound. Frodo provides an accounting of his wounds, Nob’s grammar skills nearly cause a tragedy, and Barliman puts on a brave (albeit talkative) face. We wonder if Erestor gets migraines, discover James is descended from Bill Ferny, and decide to write Barliman and Ioreth fanfic. Also, never ask a valet to park your Bugatti.

Wormtongue wishes he could leave Saruman; James is stuck with Alan for a few more episodes: make of that what you will. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we get to Rivendell in time for a party in the last of our three episodes on Many Partings. Saruman offers some parting words to the hobbits; the Keepers of the Rings offer total silence; Bilbo offers gifts he’s already given. We note that Gríma and Zathras have something in common, discuss the items for sale on Middle-earth eBay, and agree wholeheartedly with Bilbo about packing. Also, James does a pretty good Aussie accent.

Legolas is at a loss for words after visiting Aglarond with Gimli; Alan is at a loss for words after… well, never, really. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as The Fellowship of the Ring head out on their farewell tour in our second of three episodes on Many Partings. Treebeard speaks his mind about orcs, gives excuses about Saruman, and offers Merry & Pippin just one more drink. Our simple minds speculate about poetry, revisit Gimli’s rizz, and wonder if Thranduil and Treebeard went to the same school for jailers. Also, one man’s treasure is our confusion.

Gimli offers to speedily fetch his axe, while James offers to speedily fetch his microphone. Join The Man of the West in welcoming back The Sage of the South as Théoden is laid to rest in our first of three episodes on Many Partings. Arwen offers Frodo a lovely parting gift, Aragorn gifts the Grey Wood to the Drúadan, and two kings struggle with gift ideas. We talk about Éomer & Gimli’s deathmatch, wonder how you can give away what you’ve already lost, and discover two long lost names for Frodo & Sam. Also, we all need to use plenipotentiary a lot more.