S6 Ep 88 - The Past Built You. Your Future Needs You!

In this episode of The Humans vs. Retirement Podcast, I delve into one of the most disorienting aspects of life after work: identity. For decades, we’ve answered the question “Who are you?” with a job title. Director. Manager. Teacher. Lawyer. And then retirement hits — and suddenly, the title is gone. What’s left is often a quiet identity crisis no one warned us about. This episode, The Past Built You. Your Future Needs You explores why losing a role feels like losing yourself and how to begin rebuilding an identity that’s deeper, freer, and far more authentic than anything you had before. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why so many retirees experience role-based identity collapse. The hidden danger of achievement addiction, and why productivity isn’t the same as value. How identity is not fixed, but a story you tell yourself (and why that’s good news). Three powerful shifts to rebuild identity in retirement: From Role → Values From Productivity → Contribution From Legacy → Aliveness Why staying stuck in nostalgia is one of the biggest risks in retirement. How to introduce yourself without your past job title — and why this simple exercise is so transformative. Challenge of the Week 👉 Introduce yourself without using your past job title. Try it out loud. Then create an “I am” list: I am someone who makes people laugh. I am someone who listens deeply. I am someone who’s figuring it out, and that’s okay. This is how identity is rebuilt: one sentence at a time. Resources & Links 📖 Dr. Bruce Feiler — Life Is in the Transitions (on identity as fluid, not fixed). 📚 Research: Journal of Gerontological Psychology (2021) — 50% of retirees feel identity loss within the first 12 months. 👉 Share your “I am” list with me on LinkedIn or in your journal, whichever feels right. 👉 Want more? Connect with me on LinkedIn and share your Challenge of the Week answers. 👉 Buy my book The Retirement You Didn't See Coming 👉 Book a time for us to chat about your retirement plans Next Episode Up next: The Five Pillars of Retirement Well-Being (That No One Told You About) — unpacking purpose, identity, relationships, structure, and well-being, and why most people accidentally neglect all five after they retire.

Welcome back to Humans vs Retirement! Season 6 kicks off with something brand new — no guests, no panels, just me, the mic, and the unfiltered truth about retirement. In this episode, I tackle one of the biggest myths of all: that retirement is the finish line. Spoiler alert — it’s not. Retirement is the starting line of an entirely new chapter, and one that comes with as many emotional and psychological hurdles as financial ones. From the collapse of structure and identity, to the massive gap between our healthspan and lifespan, I explore why retirement isn’t about winding down — it’s about gearing up for your next act. You’ll also get this week’s Challenge of the Week: a practical exercise to help you shift from “retiring from” to “retiring to.” What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why the glossy brochure version of retirement is a dangerous myth. The difference between lifespan and healthspan — and why it matters more than you think. How retirement strips away routine, identity, and purpose (and why no one warns you about it). The 4 phases of retirement (and why most people get stuck in the messy middle). The most important question you can ask yourself before — and after — retiring. A powerful reframe: retirement as a threshold, launchpad, and second mountain. This week’s Challenge of the Week: Write your new job description as CEO of Your Own Life. Resources & Links 📚 Dr. Riley Moynes — The 4 Phases of Retirement (featured in Episode 78). 💡 Bill Perkins (2020) — Die With Zero (on memory dividends). 👉 Want more? Connect with me on LinkedIn and share your Challenge of the Week answers. 👉 Buy my book The Retirement You Didn't See Coming 👉 Book a time for us to chat about your retirement plans Next Episode Up next: Past Built You. Future Needs You — exploring identity collapse in retirement and how to rebuild a stronger, truer self without your job title.

In this deeply insightful and refreshingly honest conversation, I sit down with retirement coach and former financial services executive Toni Petrillo, founder of Retire with Intention. We explore the emotional complexities and personal transformations that often define life after full-time work, diving into the hidden challenges retirees face, particularly around identity, relationships, and what Toni calls the “messy middle.” From evolving partnership dynamics to redefining self-worth and navigating the in-between, this episode offers both practical wisdom and warm reassurance for anyone feeling unsettled in retirement. What You’ll Learn Why a solid financial plan isn’t enough, and what you need instead The concept of “retiring with intention” and how to do it well How relationship dynamics shift after work ends (and how to prepare) The danger of rushing through retirement's “messy middle” Tools and exercises to rediscover identity, purpose, and self Why curiosity and honest self-reflection are underrated retirement superpowers The real reason so many retirees feel lost, even when everything looks great on paper Key Topics Toni’s journey from financial executive to retirement coach Letting go of your business card and your professional identity The new relationship rules for life post-career Setting boundaries with adult children and grandchildren Rebuilding your relationship with yourself in retirement Understanding and embracing the “messy middle” of post-work life Designing a retirement based on your individual AND shared vision The power of pausing, experimenting, and reflecting The underestimated emotional labour of retiring Why permission, especially to feel, pause, and evolve, is everything Resources & Mentions Retire with Intention — Toni Petrillo’s coaching practice Harvard Online Course: Managing Happiness (mentioned by Toni) Statistics on Grey Divorce in the UK  Stay Connected Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it; you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It helps spread the word.

In this powerful and entertaining episode, I'm delighted to be joined by podcasting legend Matt Halloran, co-founder of ProudMouth. Together, we explore why podcasting isn't just a tool for business; it’s a deeply human medium that offers purpose, connection, and even legacy in retirement. Whether you're a financial planner looking to build trust with your audience or you're approaching retirement and searching for a creative outlet to share your story, this episode is packed with insight, humour, and encouragement. From storytelling to encore careers, legacy creation to building an ecosystem around your voice, this one goes beyond the mic. What You’ll Learn Why podcasting is the perfect pursuit for your second half of life How telling your story can create a real connection and leave a lasting legacy The simple tools and mindset needed to launch a podcast, even in retirement How podcasting can transform how financial advisers build trust and attract clients Why “giving away your wisdom” isn’t bad business, it’s great business The 4-part formula for powerful content: storytelling, education, entertainment, and call-to-action Key Topics Covered My journey into podcasting and how Matt helped spark it The evolution of podcasting: from radio tapes to legacy libraries Podcasting as therapy, storytelling, and a vehicle for human connection How retirees can use podcasting to reinvent themselves post-career The magic of interviewing clients, friends, and family Building a podcast around your encore career or consultancy Using voice to build trust and deepen client relationships Pitfalls to avoid when starting and how to play the long game Why being proud of your voice is the first step to being heard Resources & Mentions ProudMouth – Matt’s podcasting and marketing company for financial professionals The PodRocket Academy – Free courses to help you launch your podcast Book: Influence by Dr. Robert Cialdini Podcast: Ologies by Alie Ward (Matt’s pick for top-tier podcast hosting) Stay Connected Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it; you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It helps spread the word.  

In this episode, I had the privilege to sit down with world-renowned economist Dr. Jeff Brown to explore one of retirement's most misunderstood tools, annuities. But this isn’t your typical dry financial chat. Together, we unpack why guaranteed income might be the key to unlocking joy, confidence, and peace of mind in retirement. With a perfect blend of behavioural science, practical wisdom, and a few sporting analogies thrown in for good measure, this conversation tackles the emotional and psychological dimensions of spending in retirement. If you’ve ever thought annuities were boring or unnecessary, this episode might just change your mind (and your future). What You’ll Learn Why most people don’t buy annuities, and why that might be a huge mistake The “under-annuitisation puzzle” and what it reveals about human behaviour How guaranteed income permits retirees to spend with confidence Why planning to “live to 90” is a dangerous oversimplification The impact of cognitive decline on financial decision-making How framing retirement as a complex human problem changes everything Innovative policy ideas and product designs that could change the retirement game Key Topics Lifetime income vs lump sum: the psychology behind the choice Framing effects: how a few words can change your retirement plan Complexity theory in financial planning The power of defaults and nudges in retirement decisions Emotional burden of wealth vs income in later life The link between guaranteed income and happiness in retirement The decline of cognitive ability and how annuities can provide protection The role of tech and AI in the future of retirement advice Resources & Mentions TIAA (Teachers Insurance and Annuity Association) License to Spend white paper – Blanchett, Finke Health and Retirement Study (HRS), US From Strength to Strength by Arthur C. Brooks The End of History Illusion – Gilbert, Wilson, & others Stay Connected Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it; you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It helps spread the word.

In this energising and heartfelt episode, I'm joined by Tony Taylor, a retired entrepreneur turned healthy ageing coach, functional medicine practitioner, and the creator of the 7 Pillars of Ageing Responsibly. After facing the retirement cliff edge head-on, Tony rebuilt his life with purpose, resilience, and a relentless curiosity. Together, we explore what it really means to age well in today’s world, beyond the money talk and the small, intentional choices that lead to a longer, stronger, more connected life. What You'll Learn: Why retirement often starts with confusion, not celebration How to build your own "power hour" to set up each day with intention The vital difference between lifespan and healthspan How to avoid the three silent killers of retirement: complacency, disconnection, and loss of purpose Why strength training, sleep, and curiosity may be more important than your pension pot The overlooked power of cross-generational relationships What resilience really means, and how to build it at any age Key Topics Covered: Tony’s personal story: from business owner to active ageing advocate The cliff-edge effect of retirement and how to navigate it The 7 Pillars of Ageing Responsibly: Sleep Resilience Purpose Complacency Strength Curiosity Connection How to rethink your day-to-day structure in retirement Why men need to do a better job of building social connections Cold showers, olive oil, and “shopping bag carries” as unlikely tools for longevity Why mindset is the ultimate muscle to train Resources & Mentions: Tony’s blog: Aging Responsibly Book: The Sleep Book by Dr. Guy Meadows Mentioned: Eckhart Tolle – The Power of Now Stay Connected: Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it, you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It really helps spread the word.

In this inspiring and thought-provoking episode of Humans vs Retirement, I sit down with The Executive Book Coach, Helen Wilkie to explore why retirement may be the ideal moment to write the book you've always dreamed of. From memoirs to how-to guides, legacy to creativity, Helen shares practical insights and soulful encouragement for anyone curious about turning lived experience into lasting written impact. Whether you're scribbling down notes already or just entertaining the idea, this episode is for you. What You’ll Learn Why retirement can be the most powerful time to write a book The difference between a book being your legacy vs holding your legacy How the writing process helps you rediscover purpose, identity, and structure The most common obstacles that stop people from starting and how to overcome them The importance of editing, time-blocking, and defining your “why” before writing How ghostwriting and book coaching work (and why it’s not cheating) Key Topics Creativity in the second half of life How to write a book after retirement Purpose and identity beyond work Memoirs, business books, and other nonfiction options Fear, self-doubt, and imposter syndrome Writing as an experience, not a task Turning vague ideas into a finished manuscript Legacy, storytelling, and honouring your life Resources & Mentions Helen Wilkie’s free gift: How to Write a Memoir PDF and 20-minute exploratory session Email Helen at: [email protected] with subject line: “Memoir Guide” Helen’s memoir: Rare Steak, Red Wine, Hot Tango Recommended reading: On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft by Stephen King Learn more about Helen: https://theexecutivesbookcoach.com Stay Connected Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it, you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It really helps spread the word.

In this eye-opening conversation, I sit down with Stuart Ritchie, chartered tax advisor, estate planning expert, and author of Who Will Get My Money When I Die, to explore one of the most emotional and misunderstood aspects of later-life financial planning: inheritance tax. This episode isn’t about doom and gloom, it’s about taking control. Whether you’re planning for your own legacy, thinking about your children’s future, or simply want to make sure the government doesn’t get more than its fair share, this is a must-listen. What You'll Learn Why inheritance tax is about more than just money, it’s about clarity, fairness, and family harmony The critical role of wills and why DIY ones often cause more harm than good What lasting power of attorney actually does and why it’s vital even if you’re married How to avoid common traps when it comes to gifting, trusts, and tax bills Why talking to your family before you die might be the greatest gift you give them Key Topics Wills and the rules of intestacy: what really happens if you don’t plan The psychology of leaving a legacy: control, conflict, and clarity Power of Attorney: the two types and the risks of not setting one up Blended families, second marriages, and planning with complexity in mind Lifetime gifting and the 7-year rule explained Life assurance, pensions, and the new inheritance tax reforms The emotional and practical costs of poor estate planning Resources & Mentions Stuart Ritchie’s book: Who Will Get My Money When I Die? – available on Amazon Stuart’s firm: www.ritchiephillips.co.uk The Economist & Kaiser Family Foundation study on end-of-life priorities UK Government: Rules of Intestacy Reflection Exercise "What do I want to happen to my money, my possessions, and my responsibilities after I’m gone?" Take 15 minutes today to reflect on this question. If you were to pass away tomorrow: Do you have a valid will in place? Have you named executors and powers of attorney you trust? Have you had conversations with those closest to you about your wishes? Do you know the potential tax implications of your estate? Clarity now brings peace later, for you and everyone you love. Stay Connected Want more thought-provoking conversations like this one? Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Visit humansvsretirement.com for tools, downloads, and insights Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it—you might just save them (and their family) from future chaos. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Connect with me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective! It really helps spread the word.  

What really matters in retirement? After the spreadsheets are done, the portfolio’s in place, and the paycheque has stopped, what's left? In this powerful and deeply human conversation, I sit down with Fritz Gilbert, author of Keys to a Successful Retirement and founder of The Retirement Manifesto, to explore the non-financial side of life after work. We dive into the real questions: How do you stay fulfilled? Where do you find purpose? And how do you avoid the emotional pitfalls so many retirees never see coming? Fritz shares his “10 Commandments of Retirement”, a personal code he created before stepping away from corporate life and how each one has guided his journey. From “Make No Obligations” to “Keep Eternity in Mind,” these principles offer a practical, heartfelt framework for anyone who wants to retire with intention, freedom, and joy. What You’ll Learn Why mindset matters more than money in retirement How to create your own guiding principles for life after work The 90/10 Rule: Why most people focus on the wrong things before retiring How Fritz skipped the “retirement depression” so many experience Why giving yourself space and grace in your first year can change everything How to find (or rediscover) your purpose in the second half of life The surprising power of legacy, contribution, and shared purpose Key Topics Discussed Fritz’s “10 Commandments of Retirement” and how they’ve held up over time The emotional challenges many retirees face and how to prepare for them What it means to shift from saving to spending, from doing to being The founding story of Freedom for Fido and how it brought deeper meaning to retirement The role of mindset, curiosity, and experimentation in building a rich post-career life Why “retirement planning” must include much more than your finances How to craft your own post-career mission, values, and personal compass Resources & Mentions The Retirement Manifesto Blog Keys to a Successful Retirement by Fritz Gilbert – Buy on Amazon Fritz’s article: The 10 Commandments of Retirement Freedom for Fido Charity Your Next Step Want to retire well? Start by writing your own commandments. Define your values, your purpose, and what a great life looks like before you leave work. Let’s Keep the Conversation Going Follow & connect with Fritz: LinkedIn Subscribe to Humans vs Retirement on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts Connect with Dan: LinkedIn Leave us a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this episode helped shift your perspective!

In this uplifting and thought-provoking episode, I sit down with Patrice Jenkins, author of What Will I Do All Day?, to explore the real heart of retirement beyond financial plans. Together, we dig into why retirement is not simply about staying busy, but about rediscovering meaning, purpose, identity, and joy. Patrice shares insights from her decades of counseling and interviews with retirees, offering a compassionate, practical guide to navigating the messy, magical transition into post-career life. What You Will Learn Why financial readiness alone doesn’t guarantee a happy retirement. The emotional stages of transitioning into retirement and why patience is crucial. How to rediscover passions, build social portfolios, and embrace “space.” Why successful retirements often include a form of meaningful "work." How to avoid the trap of being "busy but unfulfilled." Simple frameworks to plan your next two years, not just your next thirty. Key Topics Discussed The difference between hiding out and holding out when nearing retirement. The importance of purpose, agency, and intention in retirement planning. Why internal validation matters more than external praise after leaving work. How relationships - spouses, adult children, friendships - evolve post-retirement. Embracing play, experimentation, and curiosity in later life. Strategies to transition through the inevitable “messy middle” of change. How to think differently about work as part of a fulfilling retirement. Resources Mentioned What Will I Do All Day? by Patrice Jenkins Patrice’s Website — patricejenkins.com Richard Leider’s The Power of Purpose  Book Mention: Die With Zero by Bill Perkins Memorable Quotes "Retirement is not about keeping busy. It’s about living meaningfully and purposefully every day." — Patrice Jenkins "Work gave you structure, identity, and purpose — but your next chapter can too. It just takes intention." — Patrice Jenkins "Perhaps work kept you so busy that you forgot what you used to love. It's time to remember." — Patrice Jenkins "You don't have to figure out your whole retirement — just the next two years." — Dan A Takeaway Exercise The 'What Lit You Up?' Reflection Grab a pen and a notebook. Reflect and jot down: What activities made you lose track of time when you were 10 years old? What hobbies or interests did you abandon during your working years? What would you do with a free afternoon if no one was watching? Circle one that sparks excitement and design a small experiment to try it out in the next two weeks! A Final Thought Retirement isn’t the end of the story, it’s the beginning of a new one. The key isn’t to stay busy; it’s to stay true. Stay curious. Stay purposeful. Whether you're months away from retirement or years in, there’s always an opportunity to dream, to experiment, and to build a life you’re excited to wake up to. Stay Connected If you enjoyed this episode, please: Subscribe to The Humans vs Retirement Podcast wherever you listen to podcasts Leave a rating and review, it really helps! Share this episode with someone who’s thinking about (or struggling with) their retirement journey. Download for free my whitepaper - The Skill of Spending Money in Retirement Follow me on LinkedIn for more insights and updates. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter - The Retirement Fix