Hour 1: Five Good Minutes With Dan (feat. Dan Patrick and Matthew Berry)

Have you ever had an issue with your butt accidentally deleting the apps on your phone? Do you have a problem with a restaurant menu including soups and salads with apps? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We kick off Hour 2 with one of our best songs of the year, a tribute to Rose's adventure with pepper spray. Then, Pablo Torre is here to discuss his latest episode of PTFO featuring a butter sculpture of himself, but we need to get Greg "the enemy of funny" Cote to read some edited passages from Fifty Shades of Grey first. Plus, Dan has several topics he'd like to get to before the show ends, but none are more important than Greg's takes on the MLB Hall of Fame and his new shoes from the Wu-Tang Clan. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The crew is trying to figure out a proper way to respond to Rob Manfred stealing Stugotz's idea for the Golden At-Bat. Should Stu sue Major League Baseball for a violation of his intellectual property rights? Then, Matthew Berry is here to discuss disappointing fantasy football performers, unreliable texters, and how he uses his sources to help fans with their fantasy lineups which Dan believes should be illegal. Plus, Dan Patrick pleaded with us to let Dan join him in the middle of us trying to do the show to discuss Miami and the CFP, and after we agreed to join, he only gave Dan five minutes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is there a better name for the head of the College Football Playoff committee than Warde? Joe Burrow bought a Batmobile and has thought about pulling up to a game dressed as Batman, but Greg Cote is not very happy about it. Can Joe Burrow make losing cool? Mike Ryan is wearing slacks, and Greg Cote doesn't want to even get started on the Ford Pinto. What was Greg Cote's fourth car? Plus, Smetty and Mike Ryan want Greg to read their new book 50 Shades Of Greg, but, after reading a passage, Greg is refusing to in order to uphold his journalistic integrity. Also, we continue our discussion about the College Football Playoff and revisit Mike Ryan's takes from yesterday including that Syracuse is just as good as Alabama and South Carolina should be in the Playoff. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's Cast: Dan, Stugotz, Greg, Chris, Mike, Jeremy, Jess. It's National Signing Day and Dan will get to that eventually, but first we get back to discussing the College Football Playoff. Jess has returned from her Thanksgiving trip to see her parents and learned why she is the way she is after watching Notre Dame with her father. Then, we dive into the most recent College Football Playoff rankings, which have all but eliminated the Miami Hurricanes from the Playoffs. Is it fair that they have been left out in favor of a 3-loss Alabama? Should Notre Dame's loss to Northern Illinois be disqualifying? Isn't Bama's loss to Oklahoma disqualifying? Why doesn't Stugotz care about Ashton Jeanty? While all of this madness is happening, we unearth a classic show bit where Papi reads passages from 50 Shades of Grey to make Dan extremely uncomfortable and bring up some haunting memories. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Not since the Greco-Roman period has sculpture mattered this much in sports. And Jerry Saltz — the Pulitzer Prize-winning senior art critic for New York magazine — has zero idea who Dwyane Wade is. Which is precisely why we asked the erstwhile Jewish Cowboy (we'll explain) to evaluate our athletic Bronze Age, from Michael Jordan to Cristiano Ronaldo. And that's before we get to "I Can't Believe It's Not Pablo (Butter on Gasbag, 2024)." Plus: the conscious uncoupling of art and money, sex workers in Jacksonville, how to make an enemy of envy, and why you can't be a vampire alone. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Greg Cote has some Jerry Jeudy takes he didn't get to fire off after last night's "revenge game," and the crew debates whether or not Stugotz should be inducted into the MLB Hall of Fame for giving Commissioner Rob Manfred the idea for the Golden At-Bat. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's time for a game of "Against the Spread" including a bold take from Lucy on the SEC Championship Game. Then, Sebastian Maniscalco stops by to discuss Season 2 of his show and his latest tour, but first...stickers. After Sebastian is done going after Billy Gil, he chats with Dan, Stu, and the rest of the crew about the origins of his Chicago Bears fandom and how tired he is of losing. He also ends up helping Billy with his sciatica issues. You can watch Season 2 of Sebastian's show "Bookie" on MAX and get tour tickets at sebastianlive.com. And finally, we need to end the day by discussing the details of Greg and Stugotz's book signing in Coral Gables. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Mike and Lucy are still yelling at each other about the University of Miami's merits for the College Football Playoff, and it's time for their closing arguments. How much does recency bias factor in? Is Miami's best win over a 7-5 team? Should Alabama AND South Carolina be out? Do you know ball? Is Syracuse better than 'Bama? DO YOU KNOW BALL? Did you know Syracuse lost to 3-9 Stanford? DO YOU KNOW BALL?!?!?!?!?! Then, it's time for Stugotz's Weekend Observations tackling Andy Reid, the Bears good loss and Lions bad win, LeBron James, Wink Martindale, the grocery store bar, Mike McDaniel, and the Top 5 Athlete Names If They Were Authors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As Lucy and Mike continue to argue during the break (but not scream because Lucy's a lady), the crew discusses what the point is behind UM putting up Billboards for Cam Ward's Heisman campaign. Then, it's time for Tony's Top 5 from Bayfront Park as he has thoughts on Justin Tucker, Jameis Winston, the Chiefs, the Eagles, and Kirk Cousins. Plus, Dianna Russini is here to both talk very fast and extremely slow about the Chicago Bears' Thanksgiving collapse, Aaron Rodgers and the Jets, Azeez Al-Shaair's suspension, how good the Chiefs actually are, why Russell Wilson worked out too well for the Steelers, and where Shedeur Sanders will be drafted. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices