Expecting Perfection, and other thoughts on control

Please join Dani Joy and I as we discuss pages 174 and 175 in the book Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing. We have been talking about spiritual trauma and adoption using the book as a framework. Dani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption, a homesteader, blogger and human rights activist. She can be found at:https://danijoy.substack.com/https://medium.com/@danijoy/no-sads-no-mads-trust-god-146f5cb54fb6https://www.facebook.com/joyfuldjHoly Hurt:https://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurtIf you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out for help. https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthhttps://rainn.org/https://www.thetrevorproject.org/The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, their opinions.The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening1

Please join me for a conversation with author and adoption reform advocate Patricia Knight Meyer, about being trafficked for the purpose of adoption; an adoption that never legally took placePatricias new memoir, Wonderland: Memoir of a Black-Market Adoption will be available from Unsolicited Press on 3 November 2026Patricia can be found at: https://myadoptedlife.com/ Please visit her website and join the launch list to receive updates and to sign up for free giveaways related to the release of her memoir.Patricia can also be reached at [email protected], and at 512-289-5372Patricia was born in Texas, and supposedly adopted under Texas adoption laws.https://adopteerightslaw.com/texas/https://www.dshs.texas.gov/vital-statistics/birth-records/original-birth-certificate-adultPlease be aware that, in order to receive a noncertified copy of an original birth certificate if adopted in Texas, the adopted person must already know the name(s) of any parents listed on the certificateMentioned in the episode: Georgia Tann https://www.historydefined.net/georgia-tann/https://lisacooperellison.com/https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-human-design-8729468https://psychiatrymagazine.com/why-trauma-affects-memory-ptsd-memory-loss/The listing of services and of human design is provided for informational purposes and should not be considered an endorsement by the host or the podcastThe opinions of the host and of their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalhttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThank you for listening!

Hi! Please join Dani Joy and me as we continue our conversation about adoption and spiritual trauma. We are using the book Holy Hurt, Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary L McBride PhD as a framework for our discussion. Dani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption, a blogger, a homesteader and an advocate for family preservation, mothers rights and adoptee rights. She can be found at: https://danijoy.substack.com/https://medium.com/@danijoy/melissa-thank-you-for-adding-me-304c03f358behttps://www.facebook.com/joyfuldjHoly Hurt: https://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurtMentioned in the episode:https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/internal-family-systems-model-outlinehttps://ifs-institute.com/store/419https://concernedunitedbirthparents.org/https://health.clevelandclinic.org/a-psychologist-explains-how-to-deal-with-imposter-syndromehttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/self-talkThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalPlease reach out for help if you are struggling. You matter. https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthhttps://rainn.org/https://www.thetrevorproject.org/Thank you for listening!

Please join me and guest host Dani Joy as we continue our conversation on adoption and spiritual healing. We are using the book Holy Hurt: Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing, by Hillary L McBride, PhD as a framework for our series. Dani is a homesteader, writer, mother of loss to adoption and family preservation advocate. She can be found at https://medium.com/@danijoy/dissociation-8118d4adad70https://danijoy.substack.com/https:/www.facebook.com/joyfuldj Holy Hurt book can be found at : https://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurtMentioned in the podcast: https://concernedunitedbirthparents.org/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, our opinions.The host is not a lawyer, a therapist, or an adoption professional. Thank you for listening!

I did a scary thing. Now I am doing another scary thing and sharing some impressions from attending the annual retreat for Concerned United Birthparents without relistening or editing or anything! Because, why not?https://concernedunitedbirthparents.org/https://savingoursistersadoption.org/https://thefamilypreservationproject.com/https://www.adopteeson.com/https://www.adopteesffp.org/https://adoptionpop.com/https://kristalparke.net/https://aireroots.com/https://depts.washington.edu/mswnews/2024/11/adoptee-consciousness-model-workshop-w-bipoc-adoptee-collective/https://dearabbycounseling.com/If you are struggling, please reach out for help. https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host are just that, my opinions.Thank you for listening.

What does Adoption Abolition mean? Please join me and my guest Lorah Gerald as we talk about some of our thoughts on this topic.Lorah is a Baby Scoop Era, Domestic US adopted person. She can be found athttps://lorahgerald.com/There are some statistics quoted in the episode that may be difficult to believe, and hard to find. This is because they change from year to year, and the way you input your query changes the results you will receive. I am going to just list some of the sources for information and you can go and check them out. Regarding the number of private infant adoptions in the United States per year-these numbers are not adequately captured, as reporting is uneven and not tracked in many locations. The best we can do is estimates based on different adoption organizations. This means the numbers can vary even in a single calendar year. The numbers also vary depending on whether you consider the sale of frozen embryos to be adoption, which legally is not considered adoption, even if there is zero genetic connection between the birthing person and the embryo. This is because an embryo is not a person. It is a tissue transfer. Unicefs reports on children in substitute care and on quality of life for children and familieshttps://unioncitizenship.com/best-family-friendly-countries/childbenefitstracker.org https://gitnux.org/current-foster-care-statistics/World Population Reviewhttps://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/best-countries-for-quality-of-lifeScotland's baby boxes:https://www.mygov.scot/baby-boxvs the US version, which is not a resource program:https://stopshbbnow.org/The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalhttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThank you for listening!

Please join Dani and I as we continue our conversation about adoption and spiritual trauma. We are using the book Holy Hurt: Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary L McBride PhD as a scaffold for our conversation. Dani is a mother of loss to adoption, a writer, a homesteader and an advocate for the rights of mothers and adopted people. She can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://substack.com/@danijoyhttps://www.facebook.com/joyfuldjHoly Hurt https://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurthttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe host and their guest's opinions are just that, their opinions.The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!

Please join Dani Joy and I as we keep working on exploring the spiritual trauma that is adoption! We are using the book Holy Hurt by Hillary L McBride, PhD as a scaffold for our conversationDani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption, a homesteader, a writer and an ally. She can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://substack.com/@danijoy https://www.facebook.com/joyfuldj https://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurthttps://health.clevelandclinic.org/grounding-techniques https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!

Please join us as we continue our conversation about spiritual trauma and adoption from our perspectives as an adoptee and as a mother who terminated her parental rights for the purposes of adoption. We are using the book Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing as a scaffold. You can find Dani Joy at: https://www.facebook.com/joyfuldjhttps://substack.com/@danijoy/note/p-191085730https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurtMentioned in the episode:https://www.britannica.com/topic/Mennonitehttps://faithalone.org/grace-in-focus-articles/what-is-free-grace-theology/Mentioning religions in the notes does not mean that the host or the podcast are recommending these religions or their beleifsThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalhttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThank you for listening!

Please join me and my guest Dani Joy as we continue our conversation on spiritual trauma and adoption, from the perspectives of an adopted person and a mother of loss to adoption. We are using the book Holy Hurt by Hillary L McBride PhD as a guide for our discussion. https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://www.hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurthttps://youtu.be/3e0-SsmOUJI?si=LfXUJu2f59sjqdThhttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, our opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!