The Things He Carried (Semper Fi)

As the holidays draw ever closer, there is more pressure than ever to perform gratitude. It’s a time when – despite the decorations and the cheerful music and the constant flood of party invites – many of us feel decidedly NOT OK. On today’s episode, Nora revisits her first season of grief: the first Thanksgiving after her husband, Aaron, passed away. Many of us are entering our seasons of grief or are reminded of the people that are not able to celebrate the holidays with us. Today, Nora is reminding you of one important fact: holiday cheer is entirely optional. If the holiday season is difficult for you, you are not alone. Your grief does not need to take a backseat to gratitude. You can have both. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. Our Sponsors: ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. ❤️ Go to⁠ ⁠⁠bbtoys.co/TFA⁠ for up to 80% off everything, and additional deals dropping daily. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I knew, when I started the show, that I wanted – needed, really – to talk about my father, and his experiences in Vietnam. My father died from a service related injury, cancer caused by exposure to Agent Orange, a chemical defoliant used to destroy food sources and cover provided by vegetation. Exposure to these chemicals has been linked to birth defects, cancers, parkinson’s…a whole host of issues. But long before we knew how his story would end, we knew that Vietnam was a pivotal part of it. Not because we talked about it, but because we mostly didn’t. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Get this episode ad-free here! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. You can listen to Geoffrey’s album on ⁠Spotify⁠ and ⁠Apple⁠! Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. ❤️ Go to⁠ ⁠⁠bbtoys.co/TFA⁠ for up to 80% off everything, and additional deals dropping daily. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’ve ever quit something and felt unbelievable guilt (and maybe unbelievable relief), today’s episode is for you. Here at Feelings & Co., we are firm believers that quitting is a form of self-care, and Nora is quitting’s biggest advocate. Simply put, your life is not a runaway train. If your choices start to feel wrong, you do not have to see them all the way through. You can get off, start over, and try again. Today’s guest is Geoff, one of our five male listeners, who sent Nora a zine six years ago titled, “QUIT IT.” Geoff is on the pod to chat with Nora about the importance of quitting, how to carve a more meaningful life for yourself, and more. If you have something to share, give us a call or a text: ☎️‪(612) 568-4441‬. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Check out Nora’s Instagram here! Check out Nora’s TikTok here! Check out Nora’s Facebook here! Check out Nora’s LinkedIn here! Our Sponsors: ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. ❤️ Go to bbtoys.co/TFA for up to 80% off everything, and additional deals dropping daily. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Finding the OK things in life when you are living through the Worst Case Scenario can feel borderline impossible. When you are facing down the horrible things, the idea of even trying to find one OK thing is probably laughable. Elise Loehnen is staring Terrible right in the eye – she has been recently diagnosed with breast cancer and had a brain aneurysm. And yet, she joins Nora on the show today to talk about these “speed bumps” (yes, those are her words, she is really that bad ass) and how she’s finding the OK in every day in spite of it all. You can share your okay things with us at ☎️502-388-OKAY (6529) or 📧 [email protected]  To support our show, you can subscribe to our YouTube content here. Our music is by Secret Audio, and their new album is on Spotify or Apple! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s officially fall. Okay, sure. It’s still pretty warm here in Arizona, BUT I DO NOT CARE. If the word “cozy” is mentioned, I’ll be there in my sweater with something warm to drink. And what all of us need is a list of cozy books to read curled up in an armchair. Lucky for you, Kate Baer (our literary correspondent!) is back for her second episode to help me curate the perfect fall reading list for you. If you’re in a reading slump or are just looking for new books to grab from the library, we’ve got you. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. Our Sponsors: ❤️ Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Parenting is terrifying. The moment your child comes into the world, you become painfully aware of all the dangers lurking around every corner. As parents, all we want is to keep them safe, wrapped up in our arms, warm and happy and never in pain. But, as all parents know, that’s not the way things go. And when your child is hurting, you hurt with them. Their pain is yours. And you can’t help but feel responsible for each time they stumble and fall. And though you could never control everything, the guilt gnaws at you anyway. Because why CAN'T you fix it? Shouldn't you be able to? Your child is suffering, and you cannot help but feel like it's your fault. If you had just done something differently, you could have avoided this. On today’s episode, a listener wrote in looking for help: her young son is in rehab, and she felt helpless. So, of course, Nora and the community came through to give her a pep talk. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. Our Sponsors: ❤️ Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nora McInerny welcomes poet David Gate for a lively conversation about finding “okay” in the everyday. They talk about unexpected moments of connection, new hope in Alzheimer’s research, the joy of Costco, family life, and why politicians should be held to their promises. Along the way: billionaires, hot dogs, Kelly Clarkson, and the small comforts that make a difficult world feel a little more manageable. You can get more from David at ⁠DavidGatePoet.com⁠ You can share your okay things with us at ☎️502-388-OKAY (6529) or 📧 ⁠[email protected]⁠  To support our show, you can subscribe to our YouTube content ⁠here⁠. Our music is by Secret Audio, and their new album is on ⁠Spotify⁠ or ⁠Apple⁠! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

No one prepares you for the moment that you lose your person. We will never compare one loss to another. We will never say that there is a loss that is worse, because grief is simply The Worst. But there is something uniquely horrible about losing a sibling. Siblings are our tethers to every moment of our lives — from childhood to teenagehood to adulthood — and are, most likely, the only people that could ever understand the things that molded you and made you who you are. But when you lose a sibling, you don’t just lose the person. You lose all those memories. All those moments. In March, we published an episode called Dead Siblings Society (Part One), where friend of the pod Steph Wittels Wachs shared her experience with sibling loss and we read through listener submissions from other bereaved siblings. Both guests of today’s episode were featured: Aaron, a friend of Nora’s from high school, and Emma, who wrote an email so beautiful that it left us and listeners in awe. Today’s episode is a conversation between Emma and Aaron, two bereaved siblings who lost brothers that were the other halves of their hearts. Trust us when we say that after you press play on this episode, you will be forever changed. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. Our Sponsors: ❤️ Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Something is in the air, because Nora has been contemplating getting bangs again. Oh, and the meaning of life, passage of time, etc. etc. Whatever you’re having multiple small crises about, one thing is for sure: everyone is on the brink right now. It would be amazing if there was one thing to point fingers at and blame, but in truth, the things that are pushing everyone to the brink are just as nuanced as the things we need to do to pull ourselves back. To explore why every woman ever is collectively teetering on the edge of a breakdown, Nora called Lyz Lenz – expert on all things that could push a woman over the brink.  To make a long story short: OF COURSE YOU ARE OVERWHELMED. The bar is so high that we are killing ourselves trying to reach it.  If it feels overwhelming, well, that’s because it probably is overwhelming. If you’re on the brink, I want to hear from you. Listen to Lyz’s podcast, Dingus of the Week, and read her newsletter, Men Yell at Me, by checking out her Patreon! Get the book Nora recommends to every divorced and divorce-curious woman, This American Ex-Wife by Lyz Lenz. Our operator (Nora!) is always standing by to take your texts and calls. Reach us at 612.568.4441. Watch us on YouTube here! Get this episode ad-free here! Listen to Geoffrey’s album on Spotify and Apple! You can buy Nora’s books on Bookshop or Amazon, or wherever you buy books. Nora is on IG, TikTok, Facebook and LinkedIn. Our Sponsors: ❤️ Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

These days, daily life can feel unpredictable. Every moment, many of us are bracing for impact or expecting to be pushed back into the pit of despair – but there is always a bright spot of OK. Today, Nora’s finding that for you and encouraging you to lower the bar. The thing that can make you realize that it’s going to be OK can be small, mundane, or ordinary. That doesn’t make them any less spectacular. On this episode, Nora talks about finding the OK moments even when you’re in the thick of grief, her amazing experience in Burlington, Vermont (if only she could pack up from Arizona and move there forever), her decluttering journey, restarting The Artist’s Way, and more. ⁠Read more about my life with a wife!⁠ My experience with morning pages is documented ⁠here ⁠and my conversation with Elizabeth Kott about The Artist’s Way is ⁠here⁠. For more about my decluttering experience, check out ⁠my decluttering Office Hours⁠, ⁠decluttering with Elizabeth Kott⁠, and ⁠my article about it⁠. You can share your okay things with us at ☎️502-388-OKAY (6529) or 📧 ⁠[email protected]⁠  To support our show, you can subscribe to our YouTube content ⁠here⁠. Our music is by Secret Audio, and their new album is on ⁠Spotify⁠ or ⁠Apple⁠! Our Sponsors: ❤️ Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/TFA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ❤️ Use code TFA at ⁠⁠⁠⁠Monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get your first year of Monarch Core half off at just $50. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices