#101 Why Having Sex Too Early Ruins Your Chances at Love

Send us a textThe chemical dance between testosterone and oxytocin might be the most overlooked factor in your dating life. Andre Paradis returns to the podcast to unveil the biological realities that shape our romantic interactions, particularly around sex and intimacy.Andre explains how men and women operate on fundamentally different chemical systems. Men, fueled by testosterone, thrive on competition and challenge, receiving dopamine and endorphins that regulate their nervous systems when they accomplish goals. Women, however, are primarily oxytocin-driven, finding balance through connection, touch, and communication.This distinction becomes critical when examining modern dating patterns. Women working in competitive environments experience approximately six times the stress men do in identical situations. Without testosterone to fuel them, these "boss babes" operate on adrenaline, which creates cortisol—depleting their energy, femininity, and emotional resources. The resulting oxytocin deficiency makes maintaining healthy boundaries around physical intimacy exceptionally difficult.Ready to understand the chemical dynamics affecting your relationships? Contact Andre at [email protected] for a free consultation or to receive his workbook "The Five Feminine Qualities High Value Men Find Absolutely Irresistible."Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textDavid Prosper shares his journey to becoming a clarity advocate and how finding clarity transforms our approach to relationships, dating, and self-worth. His mission began while observing capable people in his community failing to reach their potential due to lack of clarity about navigating life intentionally rather than reactively.• Growing up in the projects of Fort Lauderdale inspired David to help others find clarity in their lives• Clarity isn't about having everything figured out, but identifying your next right step• Difficult conversations lead to deeper relationships when approached with truth and grace• Many people struggle to articulate what they want in dating because they're focused on avoiding past hurts• The best intimate experiences come from clear communication about wants and needs• Self-worth builds when we follow through on commitments to ourselves, even small ones• Progress looks different every day - sometimes it's 10%, sometimes 100% - but celebrate all progress• David's book "Finding Clarity" will be released in August 2025You can reach David directly at davidbprosper.com or find him on Instagram @iamprosper1_.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textWhen someone you trust deeply hurts you in a way you never expected, how do you move forward? Dr. Bruce Chalmer, couples therapist and author, joins us to unravel the complex journey from betrayal to forgiveness.Dr. Chalmer challenges common misconceptions about forgiveness, offering a perspective that might surprise you: "Forgiveness is an inside job." Rather than focusing on whether to restore your relationship with someone who hurt you, true forgiveness is about your internal healing process. The conversation distinguishes between forgiveness and trust, making it clear that you can forgive someone without ever trusting them again. For those considering rebuilding trust after betrayal, Dr. Chalmer emphasizes the crucial role of accountability. Without genuine accountability from the person who caused harm, trust becomes virtually impossible to restore.We also explore how healthy relationships require balancing two fundamental needs: stability and intimacy. Stability provides security, while intimacy fuels growth and connection. As Dr. Chalmer explains, "Roots provide stability, but intimacy is the energy for growth." When couples sacrifice intimacy for too long in pursuit of stability, the relationship becomes vulnerable to betrayal as someone inevitably tries to "crack the sidewalk."Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textEver wondered why your relationships follow the same frustrating patterns? The answer might lie in your attachment style—a psychological blueprint formed in early childhood that shapes how you connect with others throughout your life. In this eye-opening episode, certified relationship and attachment trauma practitioner Bev Miteleman, M.A. reveals how these unconscious patterns dramatically impact our sex lives.What makes this conversation so powerful is how Mitelman connects the dots between our earliest bonding experiences and our adult sexual behaviors. She expertly breaks down the four attachment styles—secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant—explaining how each approaches intimacy differently. The anxiously attached person who initiates sex primarily to feel emotional closeness. The avoidant who enjoys physical pleasure but avoids overnight stays and deeper connection. The securely attached who naturally integrates physical and emotional intimacy. These patterns explain so much about why we behave the way we do in relationships.Perhaps most fascinating is Mitelman's explanation of why anxious and avoidant people frequently find themselves attracted to each other, creating relationships where one partner constantly seeks closeness while the other pulls away. As she notes, "Attachment styles are not gendered"—contrary to popular memes, these dynamics can appear in any relationship configuration. But there's hope in her message too. These patterns, formed through emotion and repetition in childhood, can be rewired using those same mechanisms. With awareness and consistent effort, anyone can develop more secure attachment and experience deeper, more fulfilling connections.Whether you're struggling with relationship patterns that leave you feeling unfulfilled or simply curious about the psychology behind intimacy, this episode offers invaluable insights into how we love and connect. Check out Securely Loved on Instagram, YouTube, or at securelyloved.com to learn more about healing attachment wounds and creating healthier relationships.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textHave you ever wondered what it would feel like to show up completely authentically in your relationships? To strip away the masks, scripts, and expectations that keep you playing small?Intimacy coach Hani Cheng takes us on a profound journey into radical honesty and deep connection. She introduces the concept of our "infinite being" – that part of ourselves that exists beyond our physical form and sees the bigger picture of our lives. By connecting with this expanded self, we can discern our true desires from the conditioning and external influences that often drive our choices.The magic happens when we learn to trust these authentic desires, even when they seem unconventional or taboo. As Hani explains, "Feed yourself with things that light you up from deep within. That's the most pleasurable and exploratory, rewarding experiences." This alignment creates a magnetic quality she likens to becoming a "lighthouse" – radiating your unique energy and naturally attracting compatible relationships and opportunities.But what about when subconscious patterns interfere with our authentic expression? Through a fascinating live demonstration, Hani guides us through energy work techniques to identify and clear these blocks. She teaches us to distinguish between what's truly ours and what's "hijacking" our expression.For couples seeking deeper connection, Hani offers practical wisdom on creating a relationship vision grounded in values like respect, freedom, and truth. She introduces revolutionary approaches to intimate communication, including tuning into the wisdom of the body as a source of guidance. "What is the truth of what my genitals want today?" becomes a pathway to presence, pleasure, and profound connection.Ready to transform your relationships through radical honesty? Listen now and discover how authentic self-expression can lead to the connection you've always craved. https://tantrasingapore.com/Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textWhat if the path to profound sexual connection begins long before anyone enters the bedroom? Christian de la Huerta, author of "Conscious Love: Transforming Our Relationship to Relationships," reveals how emotional awareness creates the foundation for sacred sexuality and deeper relationship satisfaction.Most of us are surprisingly clueless about our emotions, suppressing them until they either erupt volcanically or manifest as physical ailments. Christian walks us through practical approaches to developing emotional intelligence, including a simple grid method to check in with yourself throughout the day. This awareness creates choice in how we respond rather than react, allowing us to take responsibility for our feelings instead of blaming others.The conversation takes a fascinating turn as we explore how historical and cultural factors have separated sexuality from spirituality. In many ancient traditions, sexuality was considered sacred—a pathway to transcendence and union. Christian challenges the artificial divide between physical and spiritual realms, offering practical ways to reclaim the sanctity of sexual connection. He shares a delightful framework comparing sexual experiences to food—from "junk food sex" to "gourmet sex".Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textEver wonder why incredibly smart, successful women keep falling for partners who are emotionally unavailable? This deep dive with relationship coach Bern Mendez uncovers the hidden patterns that trap intelligent women in unsatisfying relationships and offers practical ways to break free from these cycles once and for all.Bern shares his journey from overcoming personal depression to helping hundreds of women transform their love lives through understanding both the neurochemistry of attraction and the emotional patterns established in childhood. He explains how our nervous systems can become addicted to the pursuit-withdrawal dynamics of unavailable partners, creating a biochemical response that feels intense but ultimately leads to heartbreak.The conversation challenges popular beliefs about healing through relationships, with Bern advocating that "there's something powerful to be done about healing the best you can without the need to connect with human beings who push all your buttons." Instead of seeking partners who remind you of difficult parents, he suggests focusing on creating safety and genuine connection with those who align with your actual relationship goals.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textEver noticed how the person you love most can trigger your worst reactions? That's no accident—it's attachment in action.Couples therapist Figs O'Sullivan joins us to reveal the surprising truth behind relationship conflicts: we don't fight because we don't care, but because we care deeply. Drawing from his journey from childhood dysfunction to creating a loving family, Figgs shares the three-pillar framework that guides his transformative approach to couples therapy.At the heart of his method lies attachment theory—the understanding that humans need emotional connection from birth until death. When we perceive threats to our bond with a loved one, our nervous system goes into protection mode. Combined with systems theory, we see how couples create feedback loops where one person's defensive reaction triggers the other's fears, escalating conflicts despite their best intentions."We're not a threat to each other," Figs explains, "we're just two threatened people having a hard time." This perspective shift is revolutionary—transforming how we view our partner's annoying behaviors as fear responses rather than intentional attacks.Ready to transform your relationship dynamics? Visit Empathi.com for free resources, including an app to identify your attachment patterns, or explore working with Figgs and his specialized team of couples therapists.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textDating coach Mark Rosenfeld pulls back the curtain on why modern dating feels so frustrating despite our unprecedented connectivity. Drawing from his own journey overcoming social anxiety to become Australia's leading women's dating coach, Mark delivers refreshingly practical wisdom about finding meaningful connections."We're so connected, now more than ever, and yet we all feel so disconnected," Mark observes about today's dating landscape. His approach balances strategic action with emotional intelligence, helping women navigate both online platforms and in-person opportunities. Rather than exhausting yourself with marathon swiping sessions, Mark recommends consistent, small daily actions that prevent burnout while maximizing genuine connections.The conversation explores the surprising truth about "high value" partners - they're rarely who we initially imagine them to be. While many daters fixate on status markers like appearance or profession, true relationship compatibility stems from emotional safety, mutual respect, and relationship skills that only become visible over time. This explains why many of Mark's clients end up happily partnered with someone who didn't match their original checklist but makes them feel deeply understood.Perhaps most illuminating is Mark's expertise on attachment dynamics, particularly the anxious-avoidant dance that characterizes so many struggling relationships. He shares practical techniques for managing emotional dysregulation during conflicts, including creating agreements in peaceful moments that prevent harmful escalations when triggers arise. His insight that "resentments are unspoken expectations" unlocks a simple yet powerful path to reducing relationship friction through clear communication.Throughout the episode, vulnerability emerges as the bridge to authentic connection. Whether you're navigating online dating algorithms or trying to communicate needs to a partner, leading with emotional honesty creates the foundation for meaningful relationships. Curious about transforming your approach to dating? Mark's program "Make Him Yours" and his online resources offer pathways to develop both the strategy and emotional intelligence needed to thrive in today's complex dating world.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic

Send us a textWhat if love isn't just a mysterious emotion but something that follows predictable patterns? Relationship theorist Zoey Charif joins us to reveal how her groundbreaking research can actually predict relationship success with mathematical precision.After experiencing heartbreak during her criminology studies, Charif spent 18 years developing a revolutionary formula that measures relationship compatibility. She explains how we can calculate our "self-score" by rating ourselves on our top five values—things like family, purpose, and dependability. This self-evaluation creates a numerical representation of our self-respect and self-love, forming the foundation for healthy partnerships.The magic happens in the numbers. Through extensive surveys of 300 couples, Charif discovered that successful relationships consistently show a fascinating pattern: partners view each other approximately 4% higher than they view themselves. This slight elevation creates a sustainable dynamic of mutual admiration and respect that allows relationships to thrive. Couples who demonstrate this pattern stay together, while those with misalignments eventually separate.Charif also breaks down relationship personality types, distinguishing between "practical" individuals who prioritize values and "emotional" types who emphasize feelings and attraction. She warns against extreme emotional tendencies that romanticize obsession and fantasy—patterns often reinforced by Disney movies and pop culture narratives about "love at first sight."Whether you're struggling to understand why past relationships failed or seeking to strengthen your current partnership, Charif's formula provides a revolutionary framework for relationship success. Her book "Love Can In Fact Be Calculated" offers a complete guide to applying these principles in your own life. Follow our podcast for more insights that challenge conventional wisdom and provide practical guidance for navigating the complex world of modern relationships.Support the showThanks for listening!Check out this site for everthing to know about women's pleasure including video tutorials and great suggestions for bedroom time!!https://for-goodness-sake-omgyes.sjv.io/c/5059274/1463336/17315Take the happiness quiz from Oprah and Arthur Brooks here: https://arthurbrooks.com/buildNEW: Subscribe monthly: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1805181/support Email questions/comments/feeback to [email protected] Website: https://straightfromthesourcesmouthpod.net/Instagram: @fromthesourcesmouth_franktalkTwitter: @tamarapodcastYouTube and IG: Tamara_Schoon_comic