Naming the Darkness: A Biblical Conversation on Depression

Football season is back, and every fan base believes this could be their year. Then kickoff comes, and you find out where your team really stands. The same is true for a man's spiritual life. In this episode of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas kick off a fall check-in for men using an illustration from Tim Keller's book on prayer. Keller pictures the soul as a boat with both oars and a sail, then asks four questions: Are you sailing, rowing, drifting, or sinking? This episode covers the first two. Sailing is the season when God feels close, Scripture jumps off the page, and prayer feels like a real conversation. Chris explains how to make the most of that momentum by going deeper with God, writing down His faithfulness, doing the hard thing you've been putting off, and pulling along a friend who is struggling. Rowing is the season when the disciplines are still in place but the joy is gone. Chris opens up about a season when a coach helped him see he had turned his relationship with God into "a metric dashboard," and he shares the three lessons that changed how he walks with the Lord. Whether the wind is at your back or you're grinding it out, this conversation will help you take an honest look at where you are and remember that you cannot row your way into a sailing season. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church.   Connect with Us Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/   Chapter Markers 00:00 – Intro 00:32 – Football Season and Hoping This Is Our Year 04:52 – A Fall Spiritual Check-In for Men 05:31 – Tim Keller's Boat: Sailing, Rowing, Drifting, or Sinking 06:57 – What a Sailing Season Looks Like 08:16 – Don't Coast When the Wind Is at Your Back 10:50 – Use Your Momentum to Pull Others Along 12:34 – Write Down God's Faithfulness 14:11 – What a Rowing Season Looks Like 17:25 – When Pastor Chris Turned His Faith into a Metric Dashboard 18:29 – Three Lessons from a Coach 20:45 – Joshua, Jericho, and Trusting Unseen Results 21:16 – You Cannot Row Your Way into a Sailing Season 21:42 – Practical Steps for the Rowing Season 24:10 – Next Steps for Sailing and Rowing

We live in a world that celebrates busyness, productivity, and always being available. But what happens when we slow down long enough to hear from God? In the Season 3 premiere of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas discuss the life-changing lessons Chris learned during his recent sabbatical. From disconnecting from technology and creating healthier boundaries to rediscovering the biblical practice of Sabbath, Chris shares how stepping away from the constant noise of life transformed his understanding of rest, productivity, and trusting God. Together, they explore why rest is more than simply taking a day off, how our desire to stay busy can reveal a deeper struggle with control, and why creating space for God's presence is essential to spiritual health. This conversation challenges men to stop measuring their worth by what they accomplish and begin living with a greater dependence on the Lord. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by responsibilities, struggling to disconnect, or simply looking for a healthier rhythm of life, this episode is a reminder that sometimes the most productive thing you can do is stop, rest, and trust God. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church.   Connect with Us Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/   Chapter Markers 00:00 – Intro 01:05 – Why Pastor Chris Took a Sabbatical 02:21 – Disconnecting from Technology and Discovering Digital Freedom 06:03 – Creating Healthier Boundaries with Technology 09:27 – Slowing Down to Hear God's Voice 13:20 – Rediscovering the Biblical Practice of Sabbath 16:15 – Trusting God to Work When You're Not Working 19:20 – It's Not a Productivity Problem. It's a Trust Problem. 21:20 – Finding Your Identity Beyond What You Accomplish 26:57 – Learning to Follow God's Timing Instead of Your Own 28:04 – Becoming More Spirit-Led Than Plan-Led 32:24 – Practical Ways to Start Practicing Sabbath

Fatherhood can feel overwhelming. Whether you’re a brand-new dad, raising teenagers, watching your kids leave the house, or trying to reconnect after a difficult season, most dads carry the quiet fear that they’re not doing enough. In this Father’s Day episode of the Step Up Podcast, Josh and Pastor Chris have an honest conversation about what fatherhood really requires. They talk about the pressure to provide, the danger of being present physically but passive emotionally, what kids most need to hear from their dads, and how spiritual leadership starts with simply following Jesus in front of your family. This episode is a reminder that dads don’t have to be perfect. But they do need to be present, humble, prayerful, and intentional. Your greatest ministry may not be the work you do outside your home, but the life you live inside it. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/ Chapter Markers 00:00 – Welcome to the Step Up Podcast 00:45 – Father’s Day, Coaching, and Family Stories 05:59 – What Fatherhood Really Feels Like 13:09 – Provision, Presence, and the Pressure Dads Carry 17:56 – Fighting Passivity at Home 20:03 – What Kids Need From Their Dad 22:59 – Leading Your Family Spiritually Without Being Perfect 27:50 – Encouragement for Overwhelmed and Disconnected Dads 36:19 – Final Father’s Day Encouragement

Marriage is one of the most important relationships in a man’s life, but it does not stay healthy by accident. In this episode of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas talk honestly about what causes couples to drift emotionally, how to pursue your spouse through exhausting seasons, and why communication, forgiveness, and intentionality matter so much. From intimacy struggles and unmet expectations to conflict, betrayal, and rebuilding trust, this conversation gives men practical handles for loving, leading, and serving their wives with humility and faithfulness. Whether your marriage is thriving or barely hanging on, this episode is a reminder that God sees you, your church is with you, and your marriage is worth fighting for. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/ Chapter Markers 00:00 — Golf, Marriage, and Ridiculous Arguments 05:16 — Why Couples Drift Emotionally 09:59 — Pursuing Your Wife Again 11:27 — Protecting Marriage in Exhausting Seasons 15:48 — Intimacy, Affection, and Feeling Wanted 21:25 — Unspoken Expectations and Communication 25:33 — Forgiveness, Trust, and Rebuilding After Hurt 31:04 — Quick Tips: Boundaries, Date Nights, Books, and Marriage Advice

In this episode of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas have a conversation around relationships, dating, and biblical manhood through the lens of the Song of Solomon. They talk honestly about singleness, fear of commitment, dating with clarity, and why men should approach relationships with intention instead of ambiguity. Pastor Chris challenges men to stop treating dating casually, to lead with honesty, to pursue holiness before boundaries are tested, and to trust God with their relationship status. Whether you are single, dating, engaged, married, or raising sons and daughters, this conversation offers practical and biblical wisdom for honoring God and others in every season. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/ Chapter Markers 00:00 – Why Talk About Dating? 05:30 – Singleness Is Not a Disease 11:00 – What Is Dating For? 17:30 – Fear, Ambiguity, and Commitment 24:30 – Boundaries, Purity, and Honoring God’s Daughter 34:00 – Know God, Walk with the Church, and Date In Community

In this continuation of their conversation on depression, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas talk about what it looks like to begin coming back from a dark season. Looking at Elijah’s story in 1 Kings 19, they unpack how God meets His people with tenderness, rest, food, presence, community, and eventually renewed purpose. Pastor Chris shares more from his own experience recovering from a traumatic burn accident and the depression that followed, reflecting on the friends, mentors, and church community who helped carry him through. This episode is a reminder that sometimes the most spiritual next step is to rest, ask for help, let others sit with you, and slowly step back into the work God has given you. For any man who feels too far gone, this conversation offers a deeply personal word of encouragement: God is not done with you.To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/ Chapter Markers 00:00 – Welcome Back: Continuing the Conversation on Depression 04:15 – Sometimes the Most Spiritual Thing You Can Do Is Rest 07:15 – The Ministry of Presence 12:30 – Asking for Help When You Can’t Muscle Through 17:20 – Getting Out of the Cave and Changing the Routine 22:20 – From Avoidance to Purposeful Action 27:30 – You’re Not Too Far Gone

In this honest and deeply personal conversation, Josh Thomas and Pastor Chris Kouba talk about depression, emotional health, and why so many men struggle to admit when they are not okay. Pastor Chris shares his own story of trauma, burnout, fear, and the dark season that followed a life-altering injury, while also pointing listeners to the story of Elijah in 1 Kings 19. Together, they explore how depression can show up through anxiety, irritability, overwork, isolation, and emotional numbness, and why men often hide it behind phrases like “I’m just tired,” “I’m just stressed,” or “I just need a vacation.” This episode offers biblical encouragement, practical insight, and a reminder that getting help is not weakness. It is wisdom. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/ Chapter Markers 00:00 Why men say “I’m good” when they’re not 03:07 Why guys struggle to name what they’re feeling 04:52 Pastor Chris shares his 2016 burn injury and dark season 12:28 Why men resist calling it depression 17:36 Elijah’s collapse after victory in 1 Kings 19 22:12 Physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual causes 36:22 Get help, say it out loud, and move toward healing

In this episode of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas reflect on the lives of two faithful men whose funerals left a deep impact on them. That conversation leads into a powerful discussion from Job 1:1 and the four qualities used to describe Job: blameless, upright, fears God, and turns away from evil. Together, Chris and Josh challenge men to think honestly about their reputation, their integrity at home, and the kind of legacy they are building right now. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/

In part two of this conversation, Pastor Chris Kouba and host Josh Thomas continue their sit-down with Todd Stewart, CEO of Gulf Winds and author of Delivering Hope: Leading a Business That Builds the Kingdom of God. Todd opens up about the hidden weight of leadership, walking through pressure, anxiety, hardship, and the difficult seasons that shaped his faith. He shares how prayer sustained him, how God proved faithful in the middle of business and personal trials, and why generosity, mentorship, and legacy-minded leadership matter so deeply. This episode is a powerful encouragement for any man trying to lead well while trusting God through the hard places. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Get Todd’s Book Here: https://a.co/d/0gBNeSGf Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/

In this episode of the Step Up Podcast, Pastor Chris Kouba and Josh Thomas sit down with Todd Stewart, CEO of Gulf Winds and author of Delivering Hope: Leading a Business That Builds the Kingdom of God. Todd shares his story of coming to faith, joining his family’s business in its earliest days, and eventually helping lead Gulf Winds into remarkable growth. But more than a business success story, this conversation is about what it looks like to see your workplace as a mission field. Together, they talk about leading with excellence, living out your faith on the job, building a healthy company culture, navigating the tension between profit and purpose, and trusting God with both opportunity and people. Todd offers practical encouragement for men who want to honor Christ in the marketplace without overcomplicating what faithfulness looks like. If you’ve ever wondered how to integrate your faith and your work in a real, grounded, everyday way, this episode is for you. To find out more about Pastor Chris, follow him on all the social platforms (@ckouba) and to connect with the ministry of United City visit https://unitedcity.church. Show Notes Get Todd’s Book Here: https://a.co/d/0gBNeSGf Follow on Instagram: @stepup.podcast Follow United City: @untdcitychurch Connect with Pastor Chris: http://chriskouba.com More About United City: https://unitedcity.church/