The Rhythm of Us

Gabe and Rebekah Lyons kick off Season 12 with a brand-new theme: The Rhythm of Us. After a season focused on their book The Fight for Us, they now tee up the top conversations that couples need to have to build a healthy communication rhythm in their marriages. Fresh off family milestones—including celebrating their son’s engagement—Gabe and Rebekah reflect on how every season of life requires new rhythms, and why conversations are the heartbeat of staying connected. They share the five practical skills to guide those conversations well: active listening, mirroring, empathy, disarming defensiveness, and telling the truth in love.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why rhythms—not just good intentions—shape the health of your marriage.How to practice active listening, empathy, and mirroring for deeper connection.Ways to disarm tension and tell the truth without tearing down.The conversations every couple needs to have in order to grow through change.How simple practices can reset and re-center your relationship.This season also introduces two new resources to help you live these rhythms beyond the podcast:The Journal For Us: 10 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have – releasing September 23, 2025 – a practical companion for reflection and intentional conversations.The Fight For Us Curriculum – releasing October 7, 2025 – a perfect guide for small groups or couples wanting to build stronger foundations together. Join Gabe and Rebekah as they set the stage for a season filled with honest and practical conversations with special guests like Josh & Christi Straub, Winston & Rachel Cruze, Jon Tyson, Ann Voskamp, Mark Batterson and many others. Tune in and get equipped to strengthen your marriage, family and friendships!ResourcesThe Journal For Us: 10 Conversations Every Couple Needs to HaveReserve your spot now for Rhythms Retreat November 21-22 in Franklin, TN. Create a free THINQ Account to access more trusted content like this on topics from all channels of culture at thinqmedia.com.Attend THINQ events where you can gather with like-minded leaders, ask better questions and have conversations that lead to wisdom:THINQ Summit Oct 2-4 in Nashville, TNMore from the THINQ Podcast Network:THINQ Media Podcast with Gabe LyonsThe InFormed Parent with Suzanne PhillipsNextUp with Grant SkeldonNeuroFaith with Curt ThompsonUnderCurrent with Gabe Lyons

Is marriage still relevant in today's culture? In this illuminating conversation, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons welcome sociologist Dr. Brad Wilcox, author of "Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization." Dr. Wilcox presents compelling research that challenges the prevailing cultural narrative that marriage hinders personal fulfillment and success.Drawing from his research as director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, Dr. Wilcox shares how marriage significantly impacts not just individual happiness but society as a whole. He explains how the shift toward "expressive individualism" since the 1970s has undermined marriage, and dispels common myths about marriage including the "flying solo myth," the "family diversity myth," and the "soulmate myth." The data is clear: contrary to popular belief, married people report greater happiness, experience better financial outcomes, and contribute to stronger communities.Rebekah and Dr. Wilcox also discuss the challenges women face in "having it all" and the importance of recognizing different seasons of life. For young adults contemplating marriage, Dr. Wilcox offers practical advice about finding someone with shared values, faith, and dreams—emphasizing that couples who build a foundation of friendship before marriage tend to experience more stable and fulfilling relationships. Whether you're married, single, or parenting young adults, this episode offers valuable insights about why the institution of marriage remains crucial for personal happiness and societal flourishing.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fJoin the Marriage May Challenge:https://www.rebekahlyons.com/marriagemayRegister for the Marriage & Parenting Retreat:November 20-21, 2025 at: https://www.rebekahlyons.com/retreatParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

Are you intentionally building your marriage, or just letting it happen? In this insightful episode, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons share the practical rhythms and intentional habits that have helped them cultivate a thriving 28-year marriage. As they near the conclusion of their seven-week series on "The Fight for Us," they reflect on the importance of proactively creating structure rather than simply letting marriage unfold on its own.Drawing from their own experience of marriage transformation after an intensive retreat in year 19, Rebekah and Gabe emphasize how establishing regular rhythms—daily, weekly, and annual—creates the foundation for a lasting relationship. From sharing calendars and locations to scheduling 15-minute daily connection times and regular date nights, these practical disciplines help couples stay intentionally connected through every season of life. The Lyons also announce their upcoming marriage journal project, "The Journal for Us: 10 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have," designed to guide couples through essential discussions about money, sex, career, calling, and more.Throughout the episode, Rebekah and Gabe offer encouragement to listeners at every stage of marriage—whether newly wed or decades in—reminding them that the fight for a thriving marriage is worth it not only for themselves but for their children, grandchildren, and legacy. With vulnerability and wisdom, they emphasize that these practices didn't come naturally in their early years of marriage but have become the essential scaffolding that allows their relationship to continue growing and flourishing.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fJoin the Marriage May Challenge:https://www.rebekahlyons.com/marriagemayRegister for the Marriage & Parenting Retreat:November 20-21, 2025 at https://www.rebekahlyons.com/retreatParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

Is your marriage missing the crucial element of community? In this heartfelt conversation, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons welcome Jeff and Alyssa Bethke to discuss how inviting others into your relationship can transform your marriage from isolated to thriving. The Bethkes, who recently moved from Hawaii to Franklin, Tennessee, share their journey of building community in each new season of life and the vulnerability required to make those connections meaningful.Jeff reveals three research-backed elements that create strong relational bonds: proximity, unplanned interactions, and vulnerability. Throughout the conversation, both couples share powerful personal stories of how having trusted friends to process challenges with has been pivotal in their marriages. They discuss the courage it takes to initiate relationships, the healing that happens when others help you gain perspective on your conflicts, and practical ways to build community even when you feel isolated.Whether you're in a thriving marriage looking to pour into others, feeling stuck in marital drift, or desperately needing support through a difficult season, this episode offers hope and practical guidance for fighting for your marriage by building relationships that can help carry you through the challenges all couples face.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fListen to Pierce’s Song “It is Well (In the Wilderness)”: https://open.spotify.com/track/4KbSkLkzQ8lbhgu1jn6ptL?si=KBschBMrQ4amNMYmkPgmpwFollow Pierce on Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/artist/5ibYqSMIViWj9BJUHznMMR?si=HfJ7C4pZQdqe3GpSDnTStwJoin the Marriage May Challenge:https://www.rebekahlyons.com/marriagemayRegister for the Marriage & Parenting Retreat: November 20-21, 2025 athttps://www.rebekahlyons.com/retreatParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

Are you trying to navigate marriage challenges without support? In this insightful episode, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons delve into why community is crucial for a thriving marriage. Celebrating both Rebekah's birthday and their son's college graduation, the couple reflects on the importance of having other trusted couples around you who can speak truth, offer perspective, and create a safe space for vulnerability.Rebekah and Gabe share from their own experiences how moving to Nashville, after living in Manhattan, was partially motivated by their desire for a deeper community. They describe how the couples they've surrounded themselves with over the past decade have been crucial during challenging seasons, offering guidance when they couldn't see clearly. The conversation offers practical advice on building community, including establishing regular check-ins with other couples, leading with vulnerability, and being intentional about who you spend time with.The episode also touches on Mental Health Awareness Month, with Rebekah reflecting on her pioneering work in bringing mental health conversations into Christian spaces. They address how mental health challenges in marriage should be approached with the same commitment as physical illness—"in sickness and in health"—and why turning toward rather than away from one another during difficult seasons is essential for healing. Whether you're feeling isolated in your marriage struggles or looking to strengthen your community connections, this episode offers hope and practical guidance for fighting for your marriage with the support of others.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fJoin the Marriage May Challenge:https://www.rebekahlyons.com/marriagemayRegister for the Marriage & Parenting Retreat: November 20-21, 2025 at https://www.rebekahlyons.com/retreatParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

Do you ever feel the weight of an invisible to-do list burdening your relationship? In this illuminating episode, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons welcome Dr. Morgan Cutlip, psychologist and author of "A Better How: Couples Can Tackle the Mental Load for More Fun, Less Resentment, and Great Sex." Dr. Cutlip breaks down how the mental load—that seemingly endless list of tasks, responsibilities, and emotional calculations we carry—affects intimacy and connection in marriage.Dr. Cutlip explains the three domains of tasks that make up the mental load (physical, mental, and emotional labor) and why women typically carry a disproportionate share in home and family life. She offers practical insights on how couples can better understand each other's needs when it comes to sex and connection, including the differences between spontaneous and responsive desire. The conversation reveals how scheduling intimacy, creating margin for emotional connection, and practicing appreciation can transform a relationship from resentment to joy.Whether you're struggling with a relational rut or simply want to deepen your connection, this episode provides actionable steps for fighting for your marriage by tackling the mental load together. As Rebekah and Gabe honestly share from their own journey, you'll be encouraged that healing and growth are possible when we understand each other more deeply.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fJoin the Marriage May Challenge:https://www.rebekahlyons.com/marriagemayRegister for the Marriage & Parenting Retreat:November 20-21, 2025 at https://www.rebekahlyons.com/retreatParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

Let's talk about sex! This week, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons break the silence around the intimate side of marriage that many couples struggle to discuss. They share how growing up with "just don't do it" messages left them confused on their wedding day, and how easy it is for couples to fall into viewing sex as either a transaction or obligation rather than the beautiful connection God designed.Rebekah shares, "sex becomes loaded with pressure until it feels more comfortable to just avoid it completely." Gabe admits his own misconceptions: "I thought if I did the dishes, it would make you want to have sex with me—like you'd want to pay me back." Their candid admissions make way for practical wisdom about the differences in how men and women approach intimacy and why weekly connection correlates with the happiest marriages. This judgment-free conversation gives couples permission to start talking about expectations, barriers, and how to rediscover sex as something that should be amazing rather than a duty to endure.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fFree Gifts when You Order Now:Get Our Free Masterclass, Growth & Connection Toolkit, Emotional Health for Marriages Course and More at https://rebekahlyons.com/marriageTake the What's Your Dance Quiz:rebekahlyons.com/quizParticipate in the THINQ resource, Let's Talk Relationships: https://events.thinqmedia.com/relationships

What does it take to maintain a thriving marriage while navigating career changes, raising children, and making major life decisions together? In this heartfelt conversation, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons welcome their longtime friends Tim and Elisabeth Hasselbeck, who open up about their 23-year marriage journey. With Tim's background as an ESPN analyst and high school football coach, and Elisabeth's experience in television, the couple shares how they've learned to champion each other's dreams while creating a strong family foundation.The Hasselbecks discuss the delicate dance of supporting each other's callings through different seasons—from Tim's NFL career to Elisabeth's time on Survivor and in television. They reveal how parenting their three children has required flexibility, vulnerability, and creating a culture where "no topic is off limits." Tim and Elisabeth offer practical wisdom on building family unity through major transitions, balancing different parenting styles, and establishing the kind of trust that encourages children to turn toward their parents rather than away from them during challenging moments.Whether you're navigating career shifts, raising teens, or simply wanting to strengthen your "fight for us," this conversation offers inspiring insights on becoming each other's biggest fan and creating a family culture where everyone feels seen, known, and deeply loved.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fFree Gifts when You Order Now:Get Our Free Masterclass, Growth & Connection Toolkit, Emotional Health for Marriages Course and More at https://rebekahlyons.com/marriageTake the What's Your Dance Quiz:rebekahlyons.com/quiz

Do you and your spouse find yourselves having the same arguments over and over? In this episode, Rebekah and Gabe unpack the communication mistakes that keep couples stuck in painful cycles of conflict. Seemingly small word choices like "you always" and "you never" can instantly trigger defensiveness, and why your tone often communicates more than your actual words.They share vulnerable examples from their own marriage—from Gabe's direct "bottom line" style to Rebekah's emotional intensity—and how they've learned to replace judgment with curiosity. Understand why men rush to "fix" problems when women often just need to be heard, and why verbal affirmation is surprisingly powerful for both partners. You’ll learn the power of "notice and naming" something you admire about your spouse this week—a small shift that can create deeper connection.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fFree Gifts when You Order Now:Get Our Free Masterclass, Growth & Connection Toolkit, Emotional Health for Marriages Course and More at https://rebekahlyons.com/marriageTake the What's Your Dance Quiz:rebekahlyons.com/quiz

What happens when you discover the roots of your marriage conflicts go back to childhood? In this vulnerable conversation, Lady A's Hillary Scott and her husband Chris Tyrrell join Rebekah and Gabe to share how facing their origin stories transformed their relationship. Chris bravely discusses how addressing childhood wounds of loneliness helped Hillary see his intense reactions not as a "scary grizzly bear" but as a hurt teenager seeking connection.Learn the importance of making time for reflection, naming emotions rather than recycling blame, and committing to "return" after conflict. This honest discussion shows how looking backward with curiosity rather than blame creates pathways to healing, bringing redemption to even the most difficult marriage moments.Order The Fight for Us:https://a.co/d/aJehu4fFree Gifts when You Order Now:Get Our Free Masterclass, Growth & Connection Toolkit, Emotional Health for Marriages Course and More at https://rebekahlyons.com/marriageTake the What's Your Dance Quiz:rebekahlyons.com/quiz