443 - The Relic (1997)

Two decades ago scientists sent a message to space... This... is the reply. This week we are joined by Eanna and Ande of The Queens of NC-17 podcast as MONSTER MARCH continues! Together we will cover 1995's SPECIES. After receiving extraterrestrial DNA from a mysterious transmission, scientists create a rapidly maturing hybrid who soon breaks free. As she embarks on her own mission, experts scramble to stop her before she endangers humanity.   Also this week: A ten thousand dollar toilet, Ben's time in the circus, and The Queens have their own version of the Step by Step theme. All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "More docile and controllable, eh? You guys don't get out much." ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- Species (1995) Directed by Roger Donaldson Written by Dennis Feldman Starring Natasha Henstridge, Ben Kingsley, Michael Madsen, Alfred Molina, Forest Whitaker, Marg Helgenberger, and Michelle Williams ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 28:14 - "The Shpiel" 52:55 - Film Breakdown 02:34:30 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro

The Next Evolution In Terror. A new month, a new theme: MONSTER MARCH! We kick it off 1997 film THE RELIC. A mysterious creature begins terrorizing a Chicago natural history museum just as it prepares for a major exhibition. A scientist and a detective race to uncover the origins of the threat before the opening-night gala turns deadly. Also this week: The difference between a peeper and a peaker, Tom Sizemore was in Heat, and is The Bloodhound Gang okay in 2026? All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Hey, let me ask you something: How the f--- does somebody get custody of a dog?" ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- The Relic (1997) Directed by Peter Hyams Written by Amy Holden Jones, John Raffo, Rick Jaffa, and Amanda Silver Starring Penelope Ann Miller, Tom Sizemore, Linda Hunt, James Whitmore, Clayton Rohner,  and Chi Muoi Lo ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 37:50 - "The Shpiel" 01:01:30 - Film Breakdown 02:13:25 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro

Ivy's best friend had the perfect house, the perfect family, and the perfect life. So...Ivy took them. This is it! The moment you've all been waiting for: Two 40 year-old-mean review an erotic thriller about two coming-of-age girls. That's right! We wrap up TAINTED LOVE month with Drew Barrymore's 1992 thriller POISON IVY. A seductive drifter insinuates herself into a troubled suburban household, forging an intense bond with a lonely teen girl while quietly exploiting the family's fractures.  Also this week: More misheard Lyrics, Lance hates the Rat People, and Ben worked at Starbucks?? All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "There's something about her. " ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- Poison Ivy (1992) Directed by Katt Shea Written by Andy Ruben & Katt Shea Starring Drew Barrymore, Sara Gilbert, Tom Skerritt, and Cheryl Ladd ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 37:50 - "The Shpiel" 01:01:30 - Film Breakdown 02:13:25 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro    

Prom night can be torture TAINTED LOVE month continues with the 2009's THE LOVED ONES. After grieving teen Brent rejects Lola's request to the dance, she and her father abduct him to force him into a nightmarish homemade prom. Trapped and brutalized, Brent uncovers the horrifying extent of their past victims and the lengths they'll go to recreate Lola's perfect evening. Also this week: Prom Stories, Ben reinterprets a song, and get us sponsored by Sheetz! All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Is it finger lickin' good?" ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- The Loved Ones (2009) Directed by Sean Byrne Written by Sean Byrne Starring Xavier Samuel, Robin McLeavy, John Brumpton, Richard Wilson, Victoria Thaine, and Jessica McNamee ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 32:40 - "The Shpiel" 49:48 - Film Breakdown 01:48:43 - Surprise Segement & Outro

Get your heart broken. TAINTED LOVE month continues with the 2009 remake MY BLOODY VALENTINE. A decade after a mining accident massacre, the town of Harmony is terrorized again when a killer in miner's gear begins a new string of brutal attacks. As survivor Tom Hanniger returns home, secrets resurface while suspicion spreads among the townspeople. Also this week: Ben vs the KFC drive-thru, Snowmaggedon 2026, and this movie's TWO Scrooges. All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Happy f---in' Valentine's Day." ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- My Bloody Valentine (2009) Directed by Patrick Lussier Written by Todd Farmer and Zane Smith Starring Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Kevin Tighe, and Tom Atkins ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 24:22 - "The Shpiel" 45:20 - Film Breakdown 01:46:45 - Surprise Segement & Outro    

Ben Cronin had the perfect life until he met the new girl. New month and a new theme! Love is in the air with our theme TAINTED LOVE. We start the new theme with the 2002 diet Fatal Attraction film SWIMFAN. A momentary fling with a mysterious classmate pulls a young athlete into a tightening web of obsession. The more he tries to pull away, the more dangerous she becomes. Also this week: Icee or Slush Puppy, Ben and Lance enjoy the Default song "Wasting Time", and remember the car theft deterrent "The Club"? All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Tell me you love me. You don't have to mean it, but just say it." ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- Swimfan (2002) Directed by John Polson Written by Charles F. Bohl & Phillip Schneider Starring Jesse Bradford, Erika Christensen, Shiri Appleby, Clayne Crawford, Jason Ritter, and Dan Hedaya ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 35:00 - "The Shpiel" 56:39 - Film Breakdown 01:53:19 - The Brain Bucket & Outro

Camping out with the family can be murder. Our good friend Amanda Waltz joins us for the conclusion of BANG-UARY with the 1977 Wes Craven classic THE HILLS HAVE EYES. A family becomes stranded in a desolate stretch of desert after a sudden breakdown. As they search for help, they discover a violent clan of cannibals stalking them from the surrounding hills. Also this week: "Crunch Hole" cereal, Amanda's exclusive Discord channel for just girls, and just how far can you shoot cow's milk out of an udder? All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Baby's fat. You fat... fat and juicy." ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- The Hills Have Eyes (1977) Directed by Wes Craven Written by Wes Craven Starring John Steadman, Dee Wallace, Robert Houston, Martin Speer, Janus Blythe, and Michael Berryman ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 48:47 - "The Shpiel" 01:11:56 - Film Breakdown 02:11:03 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro

Chucky Gets Lucky. BANG-UARY continues with the 1988 sequel BRIDE OF CHUCKY. Former girlfriend Tiffany's attempt to rekindle her romance with Chucky backfires when he murders her and transfers her soul into a doll just like himself. They manipulate an unsuspecting young couple to help them reach a magical amulet that could restore them to human form. Also this week: The wonderful Pecson Absboy, Jennifer Tilly Impressions, and Lance and Ben have a movie pitch for you! All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Rude f---ing doll." ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- Bride of Chucky (1998) Directed by Ronny Yu Written by Don Mancini Starring Jennifer Tilly, Brad Dourif, Katherine Heigl, Nick Stabile, Alexis Arquette, and John Ritter ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 41:50 - "The Shpiel" 01:05:50 - Film Breakdown 01:49:45 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro

Inspired by a true story. BANG-UARY continues as The Boys cover the 2003 remake THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE. A group of friends traveling through rural Texas stumbles upon a violent family. Their carefree road trip quickly turns into a desperate fight for survival. Also this week: Lance and Ben's favorite Skynard song, Ben tries glue, and Blake handshake drama. The #1 Sugar Ray Album Review From a Horror Podcast concludes with 2019's "Little Yachty"! All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Excuse me, you mind getting the f--- outta my way, son?" ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) Directed by Marcus Nispel Written by Scott Kosar Starring Jessica Biel, Eric Balfour, Jonathan Tucker, Erica Leerhsen, Mike Vogel, and R. Lee Ermey ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 14:46 - #1 Sugar Ray Album Review From a Horror Podcast - Little Yachty (2019) 42:30 - "The Shpiel" 01:08:20 - Film Breakdown 01:57:18 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. We're finally doing it! This week we kick off another BANG-UARY as The Boys cover the 1980 Stanley Kubrick classic THE SHINING! A man and family takes on the job of caretakers at a remote mountain hotel during the wintry off-season, hoping for peace and solitude. Instead, they encounter a growing sense of dread as strange forces begin to stir within its empty halls. Also this week: Ben's signature wink, Lance's "Joker Butter Nightmare", and we meet a new "friend": Bob! The #1 Sugar Ray Album Review From a Horror Podcast returns with 2009's "Music For Cougars"! All this--and a whole lot more--on this week's episode of NEON BRAINIACS!! "Heeere's Johnny!" ----- Check out our Patreon for tons of bonus content, exclusive goodies, and access to our Discord server! ----- The Shining (1980) Directed by Stanley Kubrick Written by Stanley Kubrick & Diane Johnson Based upon the novel by Stephen King Starring Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, Danny Lloyd, and Scatman Crothers ----- 00:00 - Intro & Opening Banter 12:00 - #1 Sugar Ray Album Review From a Horror Podcast - Music For Cougars (2009) 45:43 - Banter Part 2 51:56 - "The Shpiel" 01:25:42 - Film Breakdown 02:37:15 - Stump The Brainiacs & Outro