Chapter 6: What’s Left Behind

My daughter Emelia has a lot on her mind. After I finished making my audio documentary, I sat down with her to capture the world through her eyes, at 9. She had a lot to say about identity, friendship, kindness, and what happens when we die.  Here is just a small snippet of that wisdom, which she was happy to share with the world. 

Can you find someone again, even after they're gone? This is a personal journey about what happens when we go back in time to revisit the stories that define us - and how the things we learn can change our entire understanding of who we are.  Join us for season 1, with all episodes available now.

In this final chapter, I take stock of what I've learned throughout this project - both in terms of expected and unexpected answers.  I debrief with my therapist, Megan, on why some of us have such a strong urge to find our words and tell our stories.  And, I end with a clip from my very favorite interview - the one with my two daughter. We talk about what this documentary means to them and their own sense of identity. Thanks for joining me on this journey. Please stay in touch for season two. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com 

When you lose someone slowly, over many years, it can be hard to remember who it was that you lost in the first place. Thanks to her M.S., dementia, and heart condition, I lost my mom slowly and painfully over nearly a decade. I spent a very long time trying to process and understand what had happened so I could move the pain and anger, and find her again. And, thanks to this project, I did. This episode is about what I found when I got there. Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com   

Chapter 4 brings us forward in time, to the part where my family falls apart. We hear directly from my Dad, thanks to an AA testimonial recording we were given after he died, and compare his narrative with our memories. I finally get some answers to the burning questions from my childhood about what really happened during all those years, how much people knew, and how my sister's experiences differed from mine. And we revisit the moment when we said our goodbyes, taking a fresh look at how everything ended with him.  Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com   

In chapter 3 I go looking for answers about why my mother was always so haunted by her own childhood. What had happened that had hurt her so badly? I knew she'd been abused and had cut off relations with her family before I was born, but I wanted to understand more. So I spoke with my estranged Aunt Julie and we pieced together what we could. The result was a whole new understanding of the family I never knew, and the patterns of behavior that shaped us all. Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com 

We begin by going back to the setting for the moment my parents first met - who was there, where it happened, and the appearance of the Villeneuve brothers.  Then, we delve further back into the arrival of the O'Shaughnessys in Seattle sometime in the fifties, exploring my version of the narrative versus the memories of people who were actually there. I get to compare notes about what motivated my Dad to get into the police force, and what actually happened on that fateful night when he was shot in 1981. More importantly, thanks to my cousin Teri, I have one of my first major realizations of this entire project - one that would change my entire view of the events that unfolded and how they shaped our family. And this is really only just the beginning  Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com 

When my parents died, I found myself wondering if it's possible to heal old wounds by taking a fresh look at the past. After some time, some distance, and loads of therapy, I set out on a project to do exactly that - enlisting the help of friends and family along the way. What I found was not what I expected - and it changed me, forever.  This is the first chapter of that story, an introduction to all the questions I had and all the answers I hoped to uncover along the way. Join me on my journey, and subscribe for new episodes each week. Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lostandfoundaudiodoc/  Show website: www.lostandfoundaudiodoc.com