8 Is Your Teacher Getting in the Way? | The Attentionist

Episode 10A stranger once asked Mitra why her face looked like she’d just lost someone. She never forgot it. What are you passing on without saying a word?Information is transferred, Mitra says, but truth is remembered. And once it’s remembered, it grows like a seed. Starting from a passage in her book The Attentionist, Mitra and co-host Carlota explore why a single moment can stay with us for life. Carlota shares the story of a woman whose brief experience of being loved helped her rebuild her life after prison. Mitra offers her practice of “energetic donation”: honoring a hard day while still offering connection, sometimes with nothing more than a smile.

Episode 9 The screen you’re watching was once someone’s “nonsense.” What else are we dismissing because we haven’t experienced it yet?In the book The Attentionist, Milan tells Matria he’s a realist: he cares about physics and technology, not metaphysics and mythology. In this episode, Mitra Manesh and co-host Carlota Santamaria take up his challenge. Science zooms in to study the parts, Mitra explains, while consciousness zooms out to see the whole. Carlota adds a twist: mythology was the science of its time. Then comes Mitra’s reframe. “Nonsense” is simply what lies beyond our five senses, and that is where every creation begins. The invisible world isn’t fighting to be heard. It’s waiting patiently at the door.

Episode 8You found your teacher. You hang on every word. What if that is exactly what keeps you from learning?What happens when a teacher becomes more important than the teachings? In this episode, Mitra and co-host Carlota explore one of humanity’s oldest relationships: teacher and student. Mitra explains the difference between receiving a teaching and agreeing with it, and names three kinds of students who miss what is offered: the one who comes to test, the one who comes to admire, and the one who comes to teach. She also shares how she found her own teachers without ever looking for them, and why so many of us search for answers before we know our questions.

Episode 6 - Are you an Emotional Beggar?Waiting for someone to apologize, to notice you, to finally change. What if all that waiting is a form of begging?Most of us would never call ourselves beggars. Yet whenever we expect, demand, or wait for someone else to change so we can feel loved, respected, or at peace, we are begging. In this episode, Mitra Manesh and co-host Carlota Santamaria explore emotional begging: its different styles, the line between caring and dependency, and how to take back the power we hand to others. It begins with a simple question: what do I want to feel? And then: can I give it to myself?

Episode 6A huge wave is coming at you, and you plant your feet to fight it. What if there's another way through?When Mitra described the moment we finally say "enough is enough," co-host Carlota noticed something: she made suffering sound optional. It is, Mitra explains. Pain is what happens, in our own lives and in the world. Suffering is how we meet it: do we battle it, or dance with it? From there, the two turn to the Eternalist, the third and final state of the journey, and the three questions that guide it. Not a goal to reach, but a way to show up in the next five minutes.

Episode 5Ten options in front of you, and you can't move. What if that isn't overwhelm at all?At a recent workshop, a participant asked Mitra why having so many options can feel paralyzing. One line from her answer gave the whole room an "aha" moment: too often, we prefer the familiar unhealthy to the unfamiliar healthy. In this episode, Mitra and co-host Carlota go deeper. That frozen feeling isn't overwhelm, Mitra explains. It's the unfamiliar. And once you can name it, you can learn to choose: not the perfect answer, but your best in this moment.

Episode 4We keep chasing stability — a life that stops changing, so we can finally feel safe. Mitra Manesh calls this the black chickpea: something we were sent to fetch as children that never actually existed. It's the story of everyone stuck in survival mode.In this episode, Mitra and co-host Carlota Santamaria unpack the three questions an attentionist asks instead of the three questions a survivalist asks without realizing it:— What am I truly seeing or experiencing right now?— What are my other choices beyond what my frightened mind is offering me?— If well-being is my goal, what choice could serve me best in this moment?They talk about why choice-making itself is a source of pleasure, why self-care is the opposite of selfish, and why your body — not your mind — is the most honest place to check in when something feels off.This conversation builds on the previous episode, where Mitra outlines the three survivalist questions (What is wrong? Am I safe? Do I fit in?) — worth a listen first if you haven't already.Mitra Manesh is the author of The Attentionist: New Choices for a New World and the founder of Attentionism, a philosophy of conscious choice-making rooted in the Persian wisdom tradition.

Episode 3Survivalists live in a prison they build themselves — and most never realize they're the one holding the key.What is wrong? Am I safe? Do I belong? Mitra Manesh and Carlota Santamaria unpack these three questions — the ones that quietly run a life lived in fear, often without anyone noticing they're asking them.Drawn from the book's framework, this episode traces how the questions get normalized into daily thinking, and offers a radical alternative: instead of searching for a better question, just stop asking.New episodes every week — subscribe to follow the whole season, one page at a time.

Episode 2Your attention is a sacred force — and it's already deciding whether you live in fear or in choice?Co-host Carlota Santamaria sits down with Mitra Manesh to unpack attentionism: not a productivity method, but a practice for noticing where your attention actually goes — a few times a day — until fear stops quietly running the show. Together they explore what attentionism actually is, why survival-mode living keeps us stuck in fear, and simple daily moments where you can catch yourself and choose differently.

Season 3 - Episode 1New name, new season, same Mitra: some of you knew this show as Lights On with Mitra Manesh. It's now The Attentionist Podcast, built entirely around the book, with co-host Carlota Santamaria.Before you can choose your attention, you have to know where fear began. In this opening episode, Mitra Manesh tells the story that opens the book: the Big Everything, and all the little everythings it created — until one of them chose separation over unity, and fear entered the picture. It's a look at where we've come from, so we can see clearly where we're going, and how to get there smoothly. This episode sets up the one thing the whole season keeps returning to: the choice was never taken away.New episodes every week — subscribe to follow the whole season, one page at a time.