#191 | Why “Tolerated” Isn’t Enough: How to Parent for True LGBTQ+ Affirmation

Is your teen turning to an AI chatbot when they’re in crisis? Would you even know if they were?In this eye-opening episode, Heather Hester explores the booming use of AI mental health apps like Woebot and Replika, especially among Gen Z and LGBTQ+ youth. Why are young people choosing bots over therapists or parents? What do these tools offer and what are they missing? This conversation pulls back the curtain on a growing mental health trend and offers actionable guidance for parents, educators, and allies navigating this new reality.Understand why Gen Z is turning to AI for emotional support and what it reveals about their mental health needsLearn the real risks (and potential benefits) of AI therapy tools, especially for LGBTQ+ teensDiscover how to open meaningful conversations about mental health and tech without fear, shame, or disconnectionPress play to learn how to use curiosity, connection, and compassion, not control, to guide Gen Z’s use of AI for mental health.Resource SpotlightCrisis Text Line — Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a live, trained counselor.Jed Foundation (JED) — Programs protecting emotional health of teens and young adults: jedfoundation.orgVerywell Mind: Best Therapy Apps of 2025 — Curated reviews of mental health apps, pros and cons: verywellmind.comPsychology Today Therapist Directory — To find affirming, human-based therapists: psychologytoday.comHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous,...

What if one small act of kindness could keep someone - especially an LGBTQ+ youth - from giving up?In this heartfelt solo episode, Heather Hester unpacks why kindness isn’t just “nice” or “extra.” It’s a radical, science-backed tool that supports mental health, creates safety, and reminds others they matter. From neuroscience to real-life examples, Heather explores how connection, empathy, and action can become life-saving practices, especially for those feeling unseen, alone, or on the edge.Learn how small moments of kindness can physiologically calm the nervous system and interrupt despairDiscover real-world stories that show how kindness impacts mental health for LGBTQ+ youth and adultsGet three simple, powerful ways to practice intentional kindness this week (and why they matter more than you know)Press play to reimagine kindness as your most radical tool for connection, healing, and change starting today.Resource Spotlight:Kindness.org — Research-based tools and inspiration for practicing intentional kindness: kindness.orgRandom Acts of Kindness Foundation — Free resources to spark daily kindness: randomactsofkindness.orgMental Health America — Guidance and community programs to promote mental well-being: mhanational.orgHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.Whether you’re listening in, working with me directly, or quietly taking it all in—I see you. And I’m so glad you’re part of this journey.More Human. More Kind....

Have you ever heard someone say LGBTQ+ kids struggle with mental health because of who they are?In this urgent episode, Heather Hester dismantles one of the most dangerous myths surrounding LGBTQ+ youth: that their mental health struggles are inherent. With clarity and compassion, she explores the real causes like rejection, stigma, and lack of affirming care, and shares what parents, allies, and advocates can do to protect the lives and dignity of LGBTQ+ youth today.Learn why identity isn’t the problem, rejection is, and how that impacts LGBTQ+ mental healthDiscover the daily actions parents and allies can take to become affirming, life-saving supportsUnderstand how simple shifts in language, access, and community can protect youth from isolation, depression, and despairPress play to unlearn the harmful myths and learn how to be the advocate your LGBTQ+ loved one needs. Affirmation isn’t a luxury, it’s protection.Resource Spotlight:The Trevor Project — 24/7 crisis intervention and suicide prevention services for LGBTQ+ young people. thetrevorproject.orgTrans Lifeline — Peer support hotline run by and for trans people: 877-565-8860.GLMA (Health Professionals Advancing LGBTQ+ Equality) — Directory to find LGBTQ+-affirming healthcare providers: glma.orgNAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) — Mental health resources, education, and support groups: nami.orgHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.Whether...

What if the most life-saving thing you do this week isn’t a therapy appointment or medication, but a single, courageous conversation?For LGBTQ+ youth, suicide risk remains heartbreakingly high — not because of who they are, but because of the rejection, fear, and silence they too often face. In this vital episode, Heather Hester cuts through the discomfort to teach parents and allies how to break that silence with compassion, clarity, and life-affirming guidance.Learn the real reasons behind the suicide risk facing LGBTQ+ youth and what the data actually saysRecognize critical warning signs and how to respond without fear, judgment, or overwhelmDiscover the “index card” strategy and other proven tools that make hard conversations easier AND can literally save livesPress play to learn how your presence, your love, and your willingness to speak can become the most powerful allyship tool you have.Resource SpotlightThe Trevor Project – 24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ youth: Call 1-866-488-7386, Text “START” to 678-678, or use the chat at thetrevorproject.orgTrans Lifeline – 877-565-8860 (U.S.), 877-330-6366 (Canada)Crisis Text Line - Text "HELLO" or "HOLA" to 741-741TWLOHA Suicide Prevention Month CampaignMental Health ToolkitHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding...

Are you heading to a holiday weekend gathering with your LGBTQ child where not everyone is affirming and you're wondering how to protect their well-being without creating more tension?For many families, gatherings (family or otherwise) bring complicated emotions. When your child is LGBTQ+ and not everyone in the room is supportive, the stakes get higher. In this episode, Heather offers heartfelt, practical guidance to help you lead with courage, protect your peace, and prioritize what matters most: your child’s well-being and your own.Learn how to set compassionate, non-negotiable boundaries with extended family and friendsUse simple scripts to respond to misgendering, microaggressions, or toxic conversationsExplore ways to re-center your child and yourself before, during, and after family gatheringsPress play to feel more grounded, prepared, and empowered to lead with kindness and courage this holiday season, for your LGBTQ child and your whole family.RESOURCE SPOTLIGHTResource: PFLAG’s “When Someone You Love Is LGBTQ+” GuideWhy it matters: This is a gentle, practical guide you can even share with family members who are trying, but struggling, to understand. It’s clear, respectful, and designed to build bridges.Other helpful resources:LGBTQ Family Acceptance Toolkit – The Trevor ProjectFamily Acceptance Project – Research-based resources for families navigating identity and belongingChrysalis Mama Articles – My own words and experienceHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities

Do you think you're doing the right thing for your LGBTQ+ child, but still feel like you're fumbling through it alone?In this deeply honest and empowering episode, Heather Hester is joined by author Anna MacArthur to explore what happens when your child comes out before you’re ready and how to grow into the fierce, loving, and informed parent they need. Together, they unpack the emotional rollercoaster of learning, unlearning, and becoming an LGBTQ+ ally in real time.Hear the real story behind Anna’s unexpected journey from confusion to courage after her son’s coming outLearn how to handle grief, guilt, and vulnerability without letting fear take the leadDiscover what LGBTQ+ youth actually need from their parents and how to be that person, even when you don’t have all the answersPress play to feel seen, supported, and inspired as a parent, and walk away with new clarity, compassion, and courage on your LGBTQ+ parenting journey.Anna's book: Hope for MomsHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.Whether...

Is your school community confusing “nice” with “kind” and leaving LGBTQ+ students unsupported in the process?As a new school year begins, many of us want to build more inclusive classrooms and communities, but surface-level politeness won’t get us there. This episode challenges parents, educators, and allies to embrace kindness as a courageous, everyday act that builds true safety and connection.Learn the key difference between being “nice” and practicing real kindness in school settingsGet ready-to-use scripts for handling misgendering, exclusion, and passive comments with compassion and clarityDiscover simple ways to raise children who lead with empathy and protect their peers with quiet couragePress play to learn how kindness can become a bold tool for change—and how you can model and teach it this school year.RESOURCE SPOTLIGHT Resource: Welcoming Schools – Back-to-School Kindness ResourcesWhy it matters: This toolkit includes class posters, conversation starters, book lists, and sample lessons to help schools and families build inclusive environments from day one.Other resources to explore:Teaching Tolerance (Learning for Justice) – Culturally responsive lesson plans and conversation startersKindness.org – Research-backed kindness practices for schools and communitiesStoryCorps’ “Listen Closely” LGBTQ Archive – Stories that inspire empathy, connection, and actionHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I

Is your LGBTQ teen heading to college and you’re wondering how to support them without smothering their independence?The transition to college is a huge milestone. For LGBTQ+ students, it can bring both liberation and new layers of fear, risk, and identity exploration. This episode offers the tools and guidance parents and allies need to empower their teen while staying emotionally connected.Help your LGBTQ+ teen prepare for affirming housing, healthcare, and mental health resourcesLearn how to support their safety and autonomy with practical strategiesDiscover how to stay lovingly connected without hovering and build trust in a new phase of parentingPress play to learn how courage, communication, and allyship can transform your LGBTQ teen’s college experience for both of you.RESOURCE SPOTLIGHT Resource: Campus Pride IndexWhy it matters: A searchable database of U.S. colleges rated on their LGBTQ+ friendliness, including housing, policies, and student life. Perfect for researching before and after enrollment.Other helpful resources:OutCare Health – LGBTQ-affirming health providers nationwideTrevor Project’s Coming Out Guide for CollegeTrans Lifeline – Especially helpful for students navigating gender identity supportThe Jed Foundation – Mental health resources tailored for college studentsHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I

Is your LGBTQ teen heading back to high school, but quietly bracing for judgment, isolation, or burnout?For LGBTQ+ teens, high school is often a complex dance between self-expression and self-protection. This episode explores how parents and allies can become the steady, empowering force teens need during this crucial time without trying to control their journey.Discover practical ways to support your teen emotionally at home and at schoolLearn how to communicate with teachers and advocate for safer, more inclusive environmentsHelp your teen access affirming community, resources, and mental health tools on their termsPress play to learn how your support, presence, and courage can make this school year safer, kinder, and more empowering for your LGBTQ teen.RESOURCE SPOTLIGHT Resource: Q Chat SpaceWhy it matters: A live-chat-based support platform where LGBTQ+ teens can join professionally facilitated, identity-affirming online groups - no video, no pressure, just connection.More resources:TrevorSpace – Global community for LGBTQ+ youth aged 13–24It Gets Better Project – Stories, inspiration, and resourcesGLSEN’s GSA Resources – Tools to start or grow a school-based LGBTQ+ student allianceThe Gender Cool Project – Positive stories about trans and nonbinary youthHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and...

Is your LGBTQ child heading back to school feeling supported or silently dreading the year ahead?While a new school year can be exciting, for many LGBTQ+ kids it also brings fear of being misgendered, misunderstood, or left out. In this episode, Heather shares actionable guidance for parents, caregivers, and allies who want to make the back-to-school transition safer, more affirming, and rooted in compassion.Learn age-appropriate strategies to support LGBTQ+ kids in both elementary and middle schoolUse powerful scripts to communicate with teachers and advocate for inclusive practicesEquip your child with emotional tools, confidence-building rituals, and social safety plansHit play to find the guidance and courage you need to help your LGBTQ child feel seen, supported, and ready to thrive this school year.RESOURCE SPOTLIGHT Resource: Gender Spectrum – Back-to-School ResourcesWhy it matters: These free resources include conversation starters, tips for building support teams, and guides for both parents and educators.Other supports:HRC Welcoming Schools – tools for inclusive classroomsGLSEN Educator Guides – lesson plans, safe space posters, and school policy templatesPFLAG’s Guide for Elementary Educators – great for starting gentle conversationsHi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!Receive a free excerpt and reflection guide from my book, Parenting with Pride. Influence the Parenting with Pride companion journal content. Survey here.Find out what kind of ally you are!Share More Human. More Kind. Please subscribe, rate, and review!Connect [email protected] the Kind Space on PatreonLeave a message or voicemailBook a call! Watch on YouTubeListen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or...