411 – Tearaway Pants

In which it’s rude to eat in a helmet; Cable does his best villain bit; Bishop is clearly unfamiliar with early X-Force; we’re pretty sure clones still count as people; and Stryfe is the surprise MVP of Gambit & Bishop: Sons of the Atom. X-PLAINED: Another time Stryfe and Bishop teamed up Gambit & Bishop: Sons of the Atom #3-6 Some of the Witness’s fancy swag An extremely awkward meal Stryfe in four pages Unsubtle foreshadowing The relative ethics of killing Stryfe A visual representation of time Somewhat logical consequences Bad clone ethics Future uncertainty Le Bête Noir Hell-lord / anti-Phoenix disambiguation A fancy t-shirt The appropriate amount of mean to be to Stryfe When Gambit and Bishop: Sons of the Atom takes place relative to The Search for Cyclops (more) (again) (inconclusive) Reasons not to live under a crypt in New Orleans Betty Noir’s Relative (fictional) body counts Business-casual Stryfe Lucas Bishop, kitten guy Relitigating the X-traitor NEXT EPISODE: Eve of Destruction (and some bonus Summers family bullshit) Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which we unapologetically ship Gambit and Bishop; pelicans are deeply alarming birds; Charles Xavier watches your sex dreams; the Witness is a Whole Continuity Thing; and the T’ieves Guild is really just here to steal your stuff. X-PLAINED: Destiny’s frequently retconned diaries Midi series Gambit (more) (again) Bishop (more) (again) Gambit and Bishop: Sons of the Atom Alpha Gambit and Bishop: Sons of the Atom #1-2 When Gambit and Bishop: Sons of the Atom takes place relative to The Search for Cyclops Some things pelicans get up to An upsetting dream Ethics of telepathy (more) (again) Night science Some of what Stryfe has been up to French nouns A theoretical Orphan Black video game The Witness (LeBeau) (more) (again) The Witness Cave How to make Bishop a more central X-character The relative importance of T’ieves Guild continuity NEXT EPISODE: Stryfe in a diner! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which we attempt an all-Cyclops Winter special; X-Men are bad at processing grief; writer Alex Paknadel X-Plains his upcoming Cyclops miniseries; every character (except Cameron Hodge) is someone’s favorite; and you remain the best listeners of any podcast, ever. X-PLAINED: Clones of Cyclops Gwen Warren Our year in review X-Men: The Search for Cyclops #1-4 Ahmed and his mustache Emotional support boats A monkey Apoca-lips Anias Boxes of fire One way of coping with trauma Ozymandias (more) (again) The relative criminality of a trail of questions Cat lady problems Twice as many cat ladies named Anias as you’d expect Terrible logic Caliban (more) (again) Several unpleasant reunions Alex Paknadel’s definitive Cyclopses Fun with minor characters Proxy characters and “highly polished surfaces” Characters to revisit Sentinels Cyclops vs. his own powers Cyclops’s powers vs. continuity Who Scott Summers is when he’s alone The punch dimension The 11th Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence Many people to whom we are profoundly grateful NEXT EPISODE: Gambit & Bishop: Now Kiss Sons of the Atom Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which Marrow just want to be left alone; Spider-Man remains hapless; S.H.I.E.L.D. is unhelpful; Colossus dies; Shadowcat leaves the X-Men; and we are all on board for Mutants to Watch Out For. X-PLAINED: How Magik caught the Legacy Virus Marrow (again) Spider-Man and Marrow #1 Uncanny X-Men #390 X-Men #110 A fancy club A terrible plan The Legacy Virus (more) (again) Some deeply contrived “science” A life-affirming display of social interaction The death of Colossus A very silly sound effect Acceptable handwriting Nostalgia A double send-off Closure Mortality in Otherworld Imaginary crossovers NEXT EPISODE: Winter Special! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which Professor Xavier is a jock; all of Shadowcat’s friends are dead; Storm recruits a team; Bishop makes new pals; and everyone gets festive. X-PLAINED: Some of Mystique’s secret kids Uncanny X-Men #389 X-Men #109 Charles Xavier’s workout routine Two funerals Rave (the drug) The wrong necklace Destiny’s doodles A large knife Charles Xavier/Moira MacTaggert backstory A snowball fight A very sketchy circus A break-up “Christmas cheer” A mysterious package An X-Men nativity Sage (Tessa) Origins of X-Treme X-Men Several gifts, some more mysterious than others Charles Xavier’s legacy Warwolves (more) (again) Archangel’s color vision NEXT EPISODE: Colossus dies! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which there are a lot of explosions in X-Force; Great Britain-616 is to intelligence as Canada-616 is to military; Alastair Stuart used to be fun; Emma Frost is here to stomp on your dreams; Chamber joins the X-Men; and the Generation X kids graduate themselves. X-PLAINED: Revolution (again) Counter-X (again) X-Force #114-115 Generation X #75 Yet another origin of humanity and/or life on Earth (again) The World Engine Accurate representation of CD-Rs Genetech A swimsuit interlude Agent Corben Alastair Stuart (more) (again) A kidnapping A really amazingly terrible plan A particularly large explosion The remaining 14 issues of X-Force vol. 1 An interlude at Applebee’s Bad times at the New Xavier School A murder (more) (again) Intersectional superheroism An additional bonus murder An invitation Many goodbyes What happens next to the Generation X kids NEXT EPISODE: The end of Revolution Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which Jay remains angry at a font; a person who is obviously Kang the Conqueror is not in fact Kang the Conqueror; the pig men deserve better; and Nightcrawler should never, ever, ever be allowed to attempt grief counseling. X-PLAINED: Storm/Cable Cable #85-86, 88 Cable (more)(again) Earth-4935 Mother Askani Irene Merryweather Several cryptic witches Are you as dangerous as you think martial arts training for advanced students Shin An unlikely sound effect The Black Dawn A time catapult An End of Time Earth-805110 The House on the Borderline Gaunt One of Esad Ribic’s more entertaining accomplishments A fight One way to weaponize the T-O virus The future past of Rachel Summers Cable’s friendship with Moira MacTaggert Streets of Fire Grief counseling? Sort of? I guess? A very impressive spear Our muppet counterparts NEXT EPISODE: Two endings! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which Widget takes a heel turn; there is some confusion over sword identification; we appreciate Sir Benedict of the Falls; the Braddock family has a lot going on; and Otherworld changes hands. X-PLAINED: Names for flying horses Excalibur (2001 miniseries) #1-4 Captain Britain (Brian Braddock) (briefly) (again) The Black Knight (Dane Whitman) Darkmoor Research Facility Sword and amulet distribution Strider the Horse Why all the horses of Asgard have Tolkien names Sir Benedict of the Falls and his many axes One way to win a bridge fight Sword pops Several continuity errors Holographic James Braddock The Dad Cave Otherworld eugenecists A coronation A twist Some potential X-Factor lineups Life expectancies of mutants with healing factors NEXT EPISODE: Cable fights some guys. Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

In which Banshee is chronically hapless; the team gets new costumes (again); Chamber is a self-fulfilling prophecy; toddlers will sell you out in a hot minute; Moira MacTaggert is definitively not in; we are frustrated by excessive ambiguity; and it’s not Rashômon, but it’ll do. X-PLAINED: Banshee post-Generation X Generation X #71-74 Interior decorating New costumes (again) Chamber, but a housecat A meet-cute Teen angst Fashion An extremely awkward conversation A brief history of boba in the United States A fracas Fun things to do with extra skin Evolving teacher-student relationships Poor interrogation technique Husk vs. international terrorism, in general Ghosts of the Massachusetts Academy Villains and heroes we think would be neat as the reverse A world in which Peridot of Steven Universe imprinted on X-Men NEXT EPISODE: Fast times in Otherworld! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog. Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!  

In which history repeats itself; Senator Kelly prevaricates (and then dies); Magneto keeps the cape on; Mystique does evil science; Post remains irrelevant (and then dies); Pyro saves the day (and then dies); Cable is a large man; Moira MacTaggert does the astral nasty (and then dies); and we really, really, really want to go to Froggy World. X-PLAINED: Moira MacTaggert’s mutation A dubious plan Evidence that we are in the wrong universe Other crossovers named “Dream’s End” A significant disclaimer Uncanny X-Men #388 Cable #87 Bishop: The Last X-Men #16 X-Men #108 A surprise presidential platform Sir Gordon Phillips and his guests The new Brotherhood of Mutants Cable’s hair A lot of movie allusions An ambiguous explosion A deeply pointless retcon An illusion Cable’s psimitar Pyro’s last stand Dickalogue Astral sex The (apparent) death of Moira MacTaggert A weird bonding moment in a cemetery How to identify a time traveler The (actual) death of Senator Robert Kelly Mutant-free parts of the Marvel Universe Froggy World NEXT EPISODE: Generation X! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!