Ep. 271: Stop Checking Boxes

I’m pressing pause on the podcast for now, and I want to be honest about why. I’m in a season where my faith feels hard and I’m choosing it even when I don’t feel it. I’m taking some time to go inward, rebuild my own relationship with God, and trust that the right path forward will come.

I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to control how people perceive me, and I’ve learned how exhausting—and limiting—that can be. In this episode, I’m talking about the freedom that comes from living in alignment with my integrity and letting other people misunderstand me when I can’t control their story.    

I’m getting a little salty about the obsession with what “counts.” Whether it’s scripture study, work, or personal goals, I think we’re missing the point when we focus more on checking the box than on whether our effort is actually moving us toward the outcome we want.

I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to control the outcome, but losing my son taught me something I couldn’t ignore: sometimes you can do everything in your power to change what’s coming and still have to let it happen. Inspired by The Odyssey, I’m thinking about the balance between fighting like hell, taking action, trusting God, and eventually getting on the raft and letting yourself be carried home.

I talk a lot about looking for divinity in every day, but I’ve been thinking about what that actually means. I don’t experience big miracles or obvious communication from God very often, and for a long time, that made me wonder if God was even there. In this episode, I talk about why I think miracles can be rare while divinity is everywhere—and why we shouldn’t count ourselves out of God’s story just because our experiences don’t look like the faith-promoting stories we hear from other people.    

In this episode, I share my perspective on one of the most divisive topics in religion: modesty. I talk about why I'll never teach girls they're responsible for boys' choices, why I think how we present ourselves still matters, and how I've come to think about modesty through the lens of respect, responsibility, and maturity instead of shame. This isn't really an episode about hemlines—it's about how we choose to show up in the world.

What do you do when someone you love starts questioning the faith that means so much to you? In this episode, Julie reflects on parenting adult children with humility, trust, and compassion. Instead of focusing on controlling outcomes, she explores what it looks like to trust God, validate honest questions, protect the relationship, and choose love over agenda.

Does following God invite more opposition—or prepare you to face the challenges that were already coming? In this episode, Julie questions the narrative that the more good you do, the more you're attacked, and shares why she'd rather focus on God's power than fear the darkness. A conversation about courage, willingness, and choosing hope over fear.

What if following God doesn't protect us from hardship—it prepares us for it? Today we're talking about letting go of a transactional view of faith and discovering the kind of peace that doesn't depend on our circumstances.

I realized something while painting my office this weekend: I don't actually struggle with perfectionism. I struggle with high expectations. And those are not the same thing. Today we're talking about the difference between perfection and growth, why failure is actually required to meet high expectations, and why I don't think God ever expected us to be perfect in the first place.