#117: "How Do I Get Him to Do His Work?" (Why That Question Keeps You Stuck)

When you start doing the work and finally see your patterns, it’s so easy to look back and go, “What the hell was wrong with me?”. Especially when it comes to self-abandonment & over-functioning: The YES we didn't mean, the relationship you stayed in for too long, the needs you swallowed.In this episode, I’m talking about one of the biggest obstacles I see in this work: struggling to forgive the version of you who didn’t know better yet. We cover why self-judgement keeps you stuck, why it’s often a buffer against shame and grief, what it does to your nervous system, and how to start meeting your past self (and your inner critic) with compassion instead.💛 ⁠Come to relationship school with me in RESOURCED WOMAN - Get on the waitlist & snatch a discount!⁠✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠⁠Check out my on-demand courses & masterclasses HERE ⁠

You finally set the boundary! You pushed through the guilt, the fear and the self-doubt. And then they just walked right over it. In this episode, I’m talking about how to get your power back in that moment. We cover why setting boundaries feels so dangerous for so many of us as women, why guilt often means you’re doing it right, why a boundary is information about you and not control over them, the grief of not being met, and what to actually do next when someone keeps crossing the line!💛Join the waitlist for Resourced Woman, my 12-week program where we work on exactly these patterns right HERE 💛✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out my on-demand courses.

If you go from zero to volcano in conflict, and then drown in shame afterwards, this one’s for you. I’m sharing my own story of going boom in my relationship, why years of self-abandonment so often end in explosion, how anger becomes armour around something more tender, why our partners can’t be the ones to hold our uncontained anger, and practical ways to build the space between feeling anger and acting it out.💛 ⁠Come to relationship school with me in RESOURCED WOMAN - Get on the waitlist & snatch a discount!⁠✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠⁠Check out my on-demand courses & masterclasses HERE ⁠

In this episode, I’m talking about why reclaiming your anger is one of the most important things you can do for your relationships. We cover what anger actually is, why it hides under freeze and shame, why big cathartic rage rituals don’t create lasting change, and a simple practice to slowly build your capacity to feel it.💛 ⁠Come to relationship school with me in RESOURCED WOMAN - Get on the waitlist & snatch a discount!⁠✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out my on-demand courses & masterclasses HERE

In this episode, I'm answering the question I get asked more than almost any other, and sharing why the question itself might be what's keeping you stuck. We talk about over-functioning, why no amount of your work can make up for his, and what changed in my own relationship when I finally stopped carrying it all.✨ ⁠⁠Ready to do that deeper work of your own? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out other FREE resources ⁠⁠HERE⁠

Resentment doesn't come out of nowhere. It's a messenger. When we keep ignoring it, it gets louder, until one day we wake up ten years into a relationship and can't stand our partner anymore.In this episode I share what working through resentment in my own relationship has taught me, and why I now see resentment as a doorway back to my power.In this episode:Why the anger behind resentment makes sense, and what it's pointing toWhy powerlessness sits at the core of resentmentWhere you may have given your power away, and how to start seeing your choices again (even the ones you don't like)Why resentment can linger even after he changesHow to become your own source of validation by being with your raw pain, not the story✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support with your resentment? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out other FREE resources ⁠⁠HERE⁠

"If you keep attracting emotionally unavailable, passive or non-committal men, you're just not healed enough." This idea sells like hotcakes in the self-development space, and in this episode we'll take that idea apart.We talk about why the idea is so seductive, what it costs you, and a different way to measure your growth. ✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠

You're with a dismissive avoidant man and you want to make it work, but your needs aren't being met, conflict isn't being resolved, and there just isn't enough closeness.In this episode we cover:The shame wound behind his withdrawal and defensivenessWhy you can't do his growth for himThe one boundary that has to come firstBeing realistic about how long his change will takeThe part nobody wants to hear: your own workThis isn't about fixing him. It's about becoming a woman who can have a healthy relationship, with him or with the next man.

If you've been communicating your needs, trying everything you know, and still feel like nothing changes, this episode is for you. I'll unpack why the moments your partner can't meet you aren't a dead end, they're your growth edge.✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out other FREE resources ⁠⁠HERE⁠

Why does letting go of someone who won't fully choose us feel harder than staying? In this episode, I unpack why we cling to half-chosen connections and the addictive pull of potential and breadcrumbs, and the deeper belief that not being chosen means we weren't enough. 🌹 Join us in EMPOWERED DATING HERE🌹✨ ⁠⁠Want personalised support? Apply for private coaching HERE.⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠Check out other FREE resources ⁠⁠HERE⁠