When Divorce Doesn’t Feel Fair: 6 Strategies to Keep Clients Moving Forward

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)In this episode, we're diving into a topic that shows up with almost every client at some point: that sticky, frustrating, and sometimes paralyzing feeling that this just isn’t fair.Whether it’s the division of assets, custody arrangements, or just the emotional fallout, so many clients come into the process believing they’ve been wronged—and they often have been! But here's the challenge: when someone is stuck in a story of injustice, it can completely block their ability to make empowered decisions. And that’s where we come in.Today, we're going to unpack where that feeling comes from, what it does to your client's mindset, and offer these six coaching strategies you can use to help them move from frozen to forward.Normalize the feelingShift from fairness to empowermentReframe the narrativeUse future-focused visualizationIntroduce functional fairnessAnchor in core valuesRemember...You’re not just helping your clients “get through” this. You’re helping them build resilience, clarity, and agency in one of the hardest seasons of their lives.And that’s powerful work. Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Joining us today is Anne Wintemute, CEO of Aimee Says, an AI driven platform that empowers survivors of relationship abuse to recognize, respond, and recover.Anne is a dedicated and visionary leader, currently serving as the Co-Founder and CEO of Aimee Says. She is also the founder of A Garden Grows, a consultancy offering vital support services to women experiencing post-separation abuse. Anne is passionate about transforming the discourse around intimate partner violence and advocating for a narrative that holds perpetrators accountable.Aimee Says is a free tool to help clients recognize coercive control and abuse, manage communication, strategize and achieve better outcomes for themselves and their children.Listen in as Anne share all the ways Aimee can support both your coaching relationship and your client with confidential compassion and guidance. From identifying red flags to crafting responses to preparing for court, Aimee Says is the BFF survivors need to have in their back pocket. Aimee Says also encourages a collaborative team approach where clients can share their account with professionals who are supporting them.And for those of you in our DCA Coach Community, Anne will be joining us for a free Lunch & Learn on 7/23 at 12pm ET. Please mark your calendar to join us so you can see a demo of Aimee Says and ask all your questions. Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Today we expand on a conversation we began in episode #134 by talking with a pioneer and leader in the area of restorative communication, Dr Will Bledsoe. Today he joins us to talk about how divorce may actually be an opportunity to save your relationship.Will is the author of The Restorative Way: Harnessing the Power of Restorative Communication to Mend Relationships, Heal Trauma, and Reclaim Civility One Conversation at a Time. He has been called a pioneer for his advancement of Restorative Communication principles and practices. He is an adjunct professor of communication and a consultant who advises thought leaders, institutions, corporations, school districts, the justice system, and families to help us turn our contempt into consideration and mutual respect by utilizing Restorative Communication.We dive into the difference between a punitive paradigm (focus on determining guilt and punishment) and a restorative one (determining and understanding needs). And we learn about the powerful 5 step process that can SHIFT anyone's emotional state from dysregulated to engaged.S = Spot the signsH = Hold SpaceI - Identify What They're FeelingF = Focus on What They Need in the MomentT = Take ActionRestorative communication is the key to a divorce that, when done right, may be the key to making the relationship with your ex healthier and more functional.If you’re thinking about divorce and hope to minimize both the financial and relational impact, we encourage you to check out the coach locator at divorcecoachesacademy.com to find a DCA certified ADR divorce coach.Learn More About Dr Will Bledsoe and upcoming trainings:His Book : The Restorative WayHis Website: www.restorativeway.com Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Today Tracy and Debra are talking about all the internet clickbait content out there that is purposefully targeting people’s fears just to get follows or sell coaching, courses, or books.We absolutely understand why this stuff is popular. It’s attention grabbing, it raises alarm bells, it creates a sense of urgency, and it makes clients worry that they’re not doing enough to protect themselves or their children.But we know that this fear-based content skews perspective and sets up the possibility that consumers absorbing this information could be making their divorces more expensive and more conflicted than they need to be.We'll cover the dangers of this type of marketing, why it works, and how to work with clients who may have taken the bait. And finally, we want to remind you that purposefully targeting your audience's vulnerability for your own gain falls outside our ethical guidelines. As professional, certified divorce coaches, we do not cause undue distress, manipulate emotions, or potentially cause psychological harm to sell our services. We commit to marketing practices that are effective and yet respectful of our audiences well-being. Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)When a US based company like Divorce Coaches Academy enters the Canadian market during a time of trade tensions, it’s a lot like navigating a complex divorce negotiation.Both involve high emotions, financial stakes, competing interests, and, most importantly, the need for skilled professionals to guide the process toward a fair and workable resolution.The reaction to the trade wars this week is eerily familiar to how we see clients in divorce. These trade wars have thrust Canadians, and many Americans, into uncertainty and worry. REAL worry about their finances and ultimately their families. The headlines warn of a certain recession in Canada.We talked a few weeks ago about how Canada is changing how divorce is handled. And that means even more need for professional, conflict resolution focused divorce coaches.The cross-border partnership that we have developed with our Canadian Director, Dori Braddell, is based on mutual respect and creating win-win scenarios for both of us. There's no war here when it comes to ensuring that Canadians continue to have access to the most robust, most professional divorce coach training on the market.At the end of the day, whether you’re negotiating a trade agreement or a divorce settlement, the key to success is the same: clear communication, skilled guidance, accurate information and a focus on the future rather than the past.It really is all about finding common ground both in trade and divorce, right?It's not too late to join this Canadian cohort of DCA divorce coach training. Go to divorcecoachesacademy.com/divorcecoach to learn more and apply. Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Today’s conversation is going to be nothing but a naked plea for all divorce coaching professionals to stop trying to do this on your own.Successful divorce coaches understand the value of seeking professional development, connection and feedback to continually improve their coaching practice.What a lot of people fail to realize is that divorce coaching is a continuous process. It requires constant development. It takes a lot of time, energy, money, and deep inner work to build your practice and make your business work.We dive into all the reasons you must be part of a community to achieve the success you're looking for. And we review all the ways DCA® offers the support you need to keep growing.Free online DCA Coach CommunityFree Bi-monthly Lunch & Learn EventsCase Consultation GroupSpecialty TrainingsThe bottom line ... If you’re struggling to build the coaching practice of your dreams, stop trying to do it alone. Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)The journey of divorce and the story of The Wizard of Oz share striking parallels, making the classic tale a powerful metaphor for the emotional and personal transformation that occurs during and after a divorce. We explore the power of divorce coaching through this timeless story and uncover how, just like Glinda the Good Witch, we as coaches help our clients navigate their own Yellow Brick Roads, overcome obstacles, and realize they’ve had the power to make decisions and create change all along.Instead of trusting themselves, clients often start out with the belief that a lawyer, the legal system, or a judge (The Wizard) will provide the answers for them. As the story unfolds, we realize that the yellow brick road actually represents the journey that Dorothy must take to realize her own power. And she meets fascinating characters (scarecrow, tin man, and cowardly lion) who represent the parts of herself she needs to discover and develop in order to reach their goals.Dorothy’s journey isn’t just about reaching Oz—it’s about realizing that she had the power to go home all along. And isn’t that exactly what we want for our clients? Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)If you’re just starting out, you might be wondering, ‘Where do I find colleagues to connect with? How do I meet potential clients? And what organizations should I join to grow my business?In this episode, we give some insight about networking with other professionals - what to look for, what works, and what’s a waste of your time and money.As a divorce coach, your network is one of your most valuable assets. Unlike other fields where clients might find you through advertising alone, a huge part of your success will come from referrals—whether that’s from attorneys, therapists, financial professionals, or even other coaches. Strong networking helps you:Establish credibility in your fieldGain client referralsBuild relationships with other professionals who can complement your servicesStay updated on industry trends and best practicesBy joining the right organizations, making meaningful connections, and staying engaged, you can create a steady stream of referrals and professional support. So, be smart about it, be intentional about it, but get out there and start building those relationships! Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Divorce negotiations, whether working out financial settlements or parenting plans, can be filled with intense emotions and rigid perspectives. So today we are breaking down the reasons why flexible thinking is so crucial and we'll offer some strategies to help you negotiate more successfully.When people feel threatened or vulnerable, their instinct is to dig in and adopt an “all-or-nothing” or “my way or the highway" approach. And, we know that this positional thinking can lead to prolonged battles, increased legal costs, destroy relationships and cause greater emotional distress.John Wooden, a legendary basketball coach is known for saying that “flexibility is the key to stability”. The quote means that being flexible and ready to adapt to change can help people find stability and avoid stress.Flexible thinking allows us to:See multiple perspectives rather than just our own.Adapt to changing circumstances, which is crucial in any negotiation.Focus on long-term solutions rather than short-term emotional wins.Reduce stress by recognizing that not everything has to go exactly as planned. Listen in as we explore the science behind this idea of flexible thinking and how clients can use bamboo as inspiration for how to remain both flexible and resilient.--> Pre-Mediation Divorce Coach training begins March 3 Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)Today, our Canadian Director Dori Braddell joins Tracy for a fascinating and timely discussion of the recent changes to the family justice system in Canada, including mandatory ADR, and what it means for dispute resolution and divorce coaching.Dori shares that in 2024, some provinces have made it mandatory for divorcing couples to make an ADR attempt first before they can have their matter heard in court. Couples can no longer go directly to a judge to decide their family matters. And in provinces where it’s not mandatory (yet), she is seeing judges order couples into an ADR process or require it if either party requests it. This means that divorcing Canadians are more likely to participate in ADR, whether by choice or not, than ever before. And demand for professionals to support them will continue to grow. We know that one on one, individualized dispute resolution support from a Certified Divorce Coach can be the difference between a blown ADR attempt and a settlement agreement. Divorce Coaches are that secret weapon, the special sauce that exponentially improves the odds at succeeding in something you didn’t have choice but to do. The next cohort of DCA divorce coach training for Canada begins the week of March 9 and Dori would love to chat with you about the opportunities that this new legislation opens up for properly trained divorce coaches. You can schedule a 1-1 call with her: Dori's Calendar Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]