Apologies vs. Accountability

Jo and Ulland invite friend Kerrie Toole in a conversation reviewing some of the content presented at the annual DBT conference in Seattle.  If you are in Massachusetts and are looking for a therapist, consider Castlebrook Counseling Services, Inc. 

Jo and Ulland invite friend Kerrie Toole in a conversation reviewing some of the content presented at the annual DBT conference in Seattle.  If you are in Massachusetts and are looking for a therapist, consider Castlebrook Counseling Services, Inc. 

Ulland and Jo discuss how DBT is all about emotional processing while building capacity to live effectively regardless of emotional reactivity. 

Ulland and Jo discuss why apologies are often not helpful enough with conflict in relationships. They review what they mean by accountability and how it is different. Examples are given. Accountability has to do with looking for how we may contribute to how we may be perceived by important people in our life.

Ulland and Jo review the concept of fragilization.  They review how walking on eggshells with family members is generally not helpful, especially when both parties are walking on eggshells around each other.  Individuals in active passivity are more capable than we realize and need space to activate for themselves and build confidence.

Ulland and Jo review how parents can feel defensive in family work as though they are being blamed. They review how DBT is a no blame model and how family dynamics must be addressed. The biosocial theory suggests we learned from environments of origin and behaviors are maintained within current environments.   The idea of individual perception of past events may be more meaningful to relationships than focusing on the correct version "reality." Individuals may see things differently. It is our individual perception of events, not necessarily the events themselves, that lead to our understanding of relationships and our lived history. 

Ulland and Jo address judgments towards DBT they have heard more than once regarding being "too easy" with clients. They discuss how those unfamiliar with acceptance strategies are more likely to misunderstand how acceptance is used to meet clients where they are so that meaningful change can happen.  They review some of the assumptions within DBT that make this possible. Please review the previous episode that reviews specific assumptions for further details. Ulland and Jo realized they had not previously covered ALL the assumptions.   

Ulland and Jo finally review the therapist and client assumptions within DBT. These assumptions help clinicians adhere to the principles of DBT. Knowing these leads to understanding interventions and the philosophy of treatment. They also discuss how there are some asymmetries that are protective of the client, as well as the therapist.

Ulland and Jo review common themes in demographics found within many DBT studies. They discuss that DBT studies often include many individuals who are not heterosexual or white for example. This would be consistent when considering the biosocial model and systemic invalidation as a common experience for many clients who benefit from DBT.  These studies were reviewed and shared at the 2022 ISITDBT conference in NYC.   Can minorities benefit from DBT? — All Therapists are Jerks (squarespace.com)

Ulland brings up ideas he sometimes presents in his group on the unit, albeit at a more reasonable pace than here.  Jo discusses what meaning is to her and how to find it. It can be overwhelming to be young and believe that one has to have already contributed to a society before completing high school. Earlier Episodes of the Podcast can be found at alltherapistsarejerks.libsyn.com