The Love Boat: The Christmas Presence

🎄It’s 1970, and a couple of bear cubs have jumped through my window and are eating all my marshmallows.  Join us on a deeper than expected dive into a Christmas special by former Hanna-Barbera animator Tony Benedict that almost wasn’t released till the owner of a now-defunct Florida theme park swooped in and saved it.  CONTENT WARNING: No animals were harmed in the making of this podcast. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same about one of the 4 versions of this special.  ****  🎙 Guests:Gerry Davila (Totally Rad Christmas)  Ethan (The Hungry Reader, A Special Presentation or ALF Will Not Be Seen Tonight)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “A Yellowstone Christmas” (Tony’s Version), the original cut.  2. The theatrical version with Hal Smith in the intro and added songs and sequences.  3. The Pirates World version with scenes from Ocean World Marine Park. This version was screened for Rifftrax.  4. The Modern Sound Pictures version with the songs but no live-action segments.  5. The Unusual History of Santa and the Three Bears. (The Delbert Cartoon Report, 2021)  6. The soundtrack and some background info.  7. Hal Smith in “The Incredible, Indelible, Magical, Physical Mystery Trip.”  8. Bobby Riha (Chinook) in Hanna-Barbera’s “Jack and the Beanstalk.”  9. Yellowstone National Park’s Zone of Death.  10. Today’s TV Trope: Human Snowball.  11. CBS Storybreak’s “Grinny.”  12. Homer Simpson tries to catch a rabbit.  13. Iceman in X-Men #1.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Hardee’s Gift Checks (1970s)  ****  “Santa and the Three Bears” © 1970 Tony Benedict Productions.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 2003, and nothing puts me in a festive mood quite like a bar fight.  Join us as we spend Christmas break with the Justice League — well, most of it. Wonder Woman’s off doing something else, and Batman… you know, smells.  ****  🎙 Guests:Joey O. (Y-Not Radio, Bluesky)  James Riley (Twitter)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. Mike talks “Comfort and Joy” on Tis the Podcast.  2. Paul Dini’s notes on “Comfort and Joy,” including what where Wonder Woman and Batman were.  3. The Shrine of the Silver Monkey from “Legends of the Hidden Temple.”  4. The “Calvin and Hobbes” snowman gallery of horrors.  5. Santa gives Darkseid a lump of coal.  6. Clark and his parents’ cat, Streaky, are this universe’s Jon Arbuckle and Garfield.  7. One of the stuffed animals on Kara’s bed looks like Zook, one of Martian Manhunter’s comic book sidekicks.  8. “Sam, the Guy from Quincy” by the Arrogant Worms (re: Robert Ito as the Japanese toy company CEO).  9. The end of The Simpsons’ “Treehouse of Horror IV.”  10. Wild Swamp Thing appeared!  11. Ultra-Humanite is doing a Party Man.  12. A tangent about Oreo cookies, Martian Manhunter’s favorite food.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Burger King: Justice League Kids’ Meal Toys (2003)  Oreos for Santa (1986)  Wizards: The Podcast Guide to Comics  ****  “Justice League” and “Comfort and Joy” © 2003 Warner Bros.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1986, and Santa looks different after arriving late to the mall due to a flat reindeer.  Unfold that TV Guide you crafted into an angel centerpiece and join us for a semi-festive Christmas episode of “Mama’s Family” that will have you believing in either Santa or ghosts at the end of it.  ****  🎙 Guest:Joe Fulton (Christmas Aficionado)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “Santa Mama” on the Internet Archive.  2. A Mama’s Family reunion on “Vicki!”  3. Vicki Lawrence sings “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia.”  4. Mama’s house was also seen in “Halloween.”  5. Ken Berry (Vinton) as Peter-No-Tail.  6. The cheapest Christmas gifts we got for childhood crushes.  7. The fragility of one-of-a-kind ornaments.  8. “You Are My Sunshine” on “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.”  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Snuggle Fabric Softener Free Christmas Ornament (1986)  Snow in Southtown  ****  “Mama’s Family” and “Santa Mama” © 1986 Joe Hamilton Productions, Inc.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1990, and Santa’s lost in my confusing network of chimneys.  Prepare yourself for a more silly than spooky Christmas special that takes us from Castle Duckula to a concussion-induced space adventure and back.  ****  🎙 Guest:Adam Parker Sibun (Merry Britsmas)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “A Christmas Quacker” on the Internet Archive (it’s mislabeled as another episode).  2. Nick Knacks on “Count Duckula.”  3. Count Duckula’s first appearance on “Danger Mouse.”  4. UK Christmas TV, an extensive archive of Christmas TV listings for the UK’s main channels.  5. Jack May (Igor) was the original English voice of Muzzy.  6. The Odd Case of Dennis the Menace: 2 separate comic strip characters with the same name debuting on the same day on opposite sides of the Atlantic.  7. Return to the Turducken Hunger Games.  8. The daydream scene in “Sidekicks.”  9. Mike Oldfield’s “In Dulci Jubilo.”  10. Today’s TV Trope: Blunder-Correcting Impulse.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Shreddies Cereal: Count Duckula Adventure Scratch & Win Game (1989)  Muzzy (circa 1989)  ****  “Count Duckula” and “A Christmas Quacker” © 1990 Carleton Productions.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 2020, and a gift-wrapped puppy licked my face and made my skin turn blue.  From the Chiodo Brothers comes a charming stop-motion Christmas special about how an alien invasion of the North Pole almost ruined Christmas — and the entire planet’s gravity, but also Christmas. Plus: A “Killer Klowns from Outer Space” Easter egg, some cameos from “Elf,” and Santa with nunchucks.  ****  🎙 Guests:Michael DiGiovanni (Pop Culture Retrofit, Bluesky)  Sammy Hain (Sammy’s Easter Tails, Bluesky)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “Alien Xmas” on Netflix.  2. A behind-the-scenes interview with the Chiodo Brothers.  3. Bloody Disgusting’s review.  4. A “Killer Klowns” Easter egg hidden in the Klepts’ chamber of stolen stuff.  5. The magnetic north pole vs. the geographic North Pole.  6. Michelle Deco (Noelle) writes Nintendo trailers, including this one for The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword HD.   7. Today’s TV Trope: Tablecloth Yank.  8. “Here’s your problem: Someone set this thing to ‘evil.’”  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Coca-Cola “Santa Packs Are Coming” (1994)  Holidays After Dark  ****  “Alien Xmas” © 2020 Netflix US, LLC.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1982, and I’m trapped at sea while Mickey Rooney butts into everyone’s conversation.  Join us as we embark on a Christmas cruise aboard the Pacific Princess for a very merry episode of “The Love Boat” featuring Maureen McCormick, Donny Osmond, and Mickey Rooney as an angel in disguise as your nosy neighbor.  ****  🎙 Guests:Guy Hutchinson (Pointless Nostalgia, GuyHutchinson.com)  William Bruce West (West Week Ever, Remember That Show?)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “The Christmas Presence” on Paramount+, Pluto TV, and Facebook.  2. Sesame Street’s Love Boat parody and “Song of Ten.”  3. Guy on the history of the Lacoste Crocodile.  4. “Brady Bunch” references: Maureen McCormick can’t stop getting hit in the face , and Mrs. Brady gets her voice back.  5. What’s in Santa Stubing’s bag: Stadium Checkers, a Jeep Honcho model truck, and more.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Toys “R” Us featuring the E.T. Atari 2600 Game (1982)  Remember That Show?  ****  “The Love Boat” and “The Christmas Presence” © 1982 The Love Boat Company.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1988, and the Spirit of Christmas just broke down my bedroom door to say hello.  This edition of Scrooge Sunday turns everyone’s favorite festive tale of redemption on its head and blows it out its enormous, muscular backside as great philanthropist and all-around softy Ebenezer Blackadder learns from watching his ancestors and descendants that it’s good to be bad.  ****  🎙 Guest:  Jack Ford (Total Christmas Podcast)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:  1. “Blackadder’s Christmas Carol” on Vimeo.  2. Tony Robinson’s “Christmas Wrapping” and the Total Christmas Podcast episode on it.  3. How have I never heard of humbug candies?  4. “A Merry Messy Kweznuz.”  5. A deleted scene.  6. Miriam Margolyes (Queen Victoria) in “Little Shop of Horrors.”  7. Jim Broadbent (Prince Albert) as Santa in an Aldi Christmas ad.  8. “The Last of Scrooge,” and Jack’s review of it.  9. The cast of “Grange Hill” sings “Just Say No.”  10. Dennis Lill (Beadle) in “Batman” (1989).  11. Spitting Image and “The Chicken Song.”  12. Merry Britsmas on “A Christmas Carol Goes Wrong.”  ****  📼 Commercial Break:  BBC1 Intro to “Blackadder’s Christmas Carol” (1988)  Barclaycard: “Surveillance” (1995), starring Rowan Atkinson.  Festive Foreign Film Fans.  ****  “Blackadder’s Christmas Carol” © 1988 BBC.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 2001, and a rock giant is chasing us across the ocean, which has been entirely frozen over by fairies with minty fresh breath.  From the makers of “ReBoot” and Dire Straits’ “Money for Nothing” music video comes Barbie’s first feature-length movie, complete with motion capture of the New York City Ballet, revolutionary hair animation, and Tim Curry as an extra sassy Mouse King.  ****  🎙 Guests:Kristi and Bri from Bad Princess Movies.  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. “Barbie and the Nutcracker” on the Internet Archive.  2. Bad Princess Movies on “Barbie in The Nutcracker.”  3. Motion capture footage of the New York City Ballet.  4. Oops, we went on multiple Zelda tangents about Majora’s Mask and the Song of Storms.  5. It’s usually not a good sign when you find a doll on the ground in a destroyed village.  6. Of course there’s a toy of Marzipan the horse (no relation to the Marzipan with the answering machine).  7. Today’s TV Trope: Literal Cliffhanger.  8. Do the Great Lakes freeze over?  9. Mod Hair Ken and his stick-on facial hair.  10. Barbie eyes new horizons (BBC News, 2001).  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Barbie in the Nutcracker My Size Sugarplum Princess (2001)  “A Very Zelda Christmas,” by DarkNuck, on Apple Music, Spotify, and YouTube.  ****  “Barbie in The Nutcracker” © 2001 Mattel, Inc.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1984, and Santa’s in front of a firing squad because his executioner didn’t appreciate the socks he got last Christmas.  The slime is an extra festive shade of green in this Christmas episode of the show that defined Nickelodeon’s early years, featuring an all-star cast of the 5 most featured kid actors of “You Can’t Do That on Television.”  ****  🎙 Guests:Shawn Robare (Plastic Rocket Pop, Cult Film Club, Wolfman’s Got Nards)  Steven (UFO Club, The Bigfoot Club)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. Watch the Christmas episode on Facebook.  2. Shawn’s piece of the Prevert Family’s living room wallpaper.  3. Nick Knacks on “You Can’t Do That on Television.”  4. Mike pitches a sequel to “Santa Claus: The Movie” on SequelQuest (2020).  5. “UFO Kidnapped,” a TV pilot featuring much of the same cast of kids.  6. Les Lye as Professor Coldheart in “The Care Bears in the Land Without Feelings.”  7. How we’ve fielded the question of Santa’s one-night flight.  8. Abby Hagyard (Mom) on YouTube.  9. Ice Cream Dolls, The Visible Man, and the G.I. Joe Motorized Battle Tank.  10. Calvin and Hobbes makes the same “Santa wants beer” joke.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:“You Can’t Do That on Television” Green Slime Shampoo (circa 1987)  The Lost Christmas Podcast.  “A Very Zelda Christmas,” by DarkNuck, on Apple Music, Spotify, and YouTube.  ****  “You Can’t Do That on Television” © 1984 Carleton Productions.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.

🎄It’s 1995, and Robert Downey Jr. may or may not be holding Kermit the Frog hostage until he gets his perfect Christmas tree.  The Advent Calendar House is back in time for a freakin’ country bear jamberoo as a family of Muppet mice risk their lives to bring home the top of the top of the top of the top of a Christmas tree fit for an eccentric future Iron Man. Also starring shy butler Leslie Nielsen, homesick Swedish maid Stockard Channing, and a pre-Bobo Bobo the Bear.  ****  🎙 Guests:Anthony Strand (ToughPigs.com, Movin’ Right Along, Bluesky)  Tim Babb (Can’t Wait for Christmas Podcast)  ****  💬 Topics & Tangents:1. Mr. Willowby’s Christmas Tree: 1995 broadcast with commercials.  2. Muppet Wiki entry.  3. The original book.  4. An odd TV promo featuring Brian Cummings’ Kermit the Frog impression.  5. Kermit and Miss Piggy’s music video of “She Drives Me Crazy,” featuring Leslie Nielsen.  6. Movin’ Right Along talks Kermit: Unpigged.  7. The Sesame Street Muppets on “The West Wing” with Stockard Channing.  8. Mama and Papa Bear are Beth from “The Muppets Take Manhattan” and the future Bobo from “Muppets Tonight.”  9. “Jim Henson’s Animal Show” on Owls… and Humans.  10. Sandra Bullock plays the glass harp in “Miss Congeniality.”  11. An Oreo commercial where a mall Santa takes off his beard way too quickly.  ****  📼 Commercial Break:Dizzy Grizzlies and Ritz Air Crisps (1995)  “Santa in His Own Words,” a book by North Pole Radio’s Matt Spaulding.  ****  “Mr. Willowby’s Christmas Tree” © 1995 Jim Henson Productions, Inc.   Theme song by Bronwen’s Ghost.  Full show notes and social links at adventcalendar.house.