COMEDY

A short poem I wrote in the Churchillian style as a rousing battle cry to charge our team to victory.

Greta has an almost impossible sales pitch she's to demand that the incredibly rich dumped that expensive pieces of kitsch , they fly to the cop out climate meetings in their lear jets and show not the slightest hesitation of any regrets, her gargantuan glitch is to try to move these people towards the green dream of a beggars itch, but these dinosaurs who block destiny's drawbridge are mega rich and have no intention of surrendering any of their Kardashian kitsch. To quote Churchill sardonically, , "Never was so much owed by so many to so few".

The birds and bees have joined us from the flowers and trees you find them at Macdonald's an champagne bars lapping up our left over cream teas they'll hardly be floaty lite on the breeze after feasting on our fat fantastic sleaze.

A musing for a wonderful women we called Ann Summers due to her working there, she asked for a birthday card poem and caused me a writer's block which when I tried to explain she cursed me a look of pure disdain , so I wrote it along the lines of if I'd bumped into her serving at the Ann summers shop. Katie looks at all men with indifference and always takes fun from them I say Bravo Darling it's all we do so deserve . Art work by Steven Richardson.

Growing up in a witches coven with all of them casting spells over everything and everyone I couldn't understand the horoscope stars then or now  , they  were always fighting for the Sorceresse's supremacy Mystic Meg was of their best loved astro-donnas.

A song for a love honey we called Ann Summers due to her working there, she asked me for a birthday card poem and caused me a writer's block which when I tried to explain she cursed me a look of pure disdain , so I wrote this along the lines of a frigid flustering fool that she'd doubtless be serving at the Ann summers shop. Katie looks at all men with indifference and always takes fun from them , Bravo darling it's all we deserve.

A musing written for lily age 9 and her cat Sean who's got terribly fat due to been neutered, he's put on a lot of weight I've narrated it in a yorkshire accent due to Sean being born and raised in Harrogate .

Another crazy  sketch about the life of Thornton Harding the junior an aristocrat who's mad about his pets , he calls them by the strangest names, such as his dog ,Warrington greyfriars Benson who i might add is allowed to do anything even drive his car .

A poem about falling into destitution especially ex soldiers and sailors who you find in the beggars brigade of most British towns, how easy to forget these courageous service personnel who once protected us .

This is a musing I wrote after listening to my father who'd been conscripted into the British army during the second world war, you can quite easily see why by year twenty three most members of the military have gone completely mad with OCD, its perhaps due to the cour d'esprit of the British army ,which has a relentless marching rhythm beating to the sweet spot tempo of 120 , from day one your heart soul body and mind are recalibrated and realined to the measured metronome of the military kind, in order for you to keep in perfect tune whilst playing together in the theatre of war with the other synchronised members of your military core.