Recovery Elevator podkast

RE 351: Strength and Courage

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Episode 351 – Strength and Courage

 

Today we have Tom.  He is 47, from Bozeman, MT, and took his last drink on September 24, 2019.

 

Café RE’s annual on-line conference called Regionals starts Friday 11/12-13/2021.  This is a Café RE members’ only free event.  This will include yoga, sound healing, meditations, and breakout rooms.  Go to:

www.recoveryelevator.com promo code: opportunity for more info.

 

Highlights from Paul

 

Paul shares some helpful hints from listeners to develop a game plan for the holidays.   There are 54 days left in 2021 and Paul is encouraging you to start now with your plan to ditch the booze. 

 

1)  Accountability – get an accountability partner.  Café RE members’ email: [email protected] with your name, age, location, male or female, and date of last drink and KMac will get you paired.  If you are going somewhere for a holiday gathering, let the host know you won’t be drinking and ask them not to offer you any alcohol. 2) Stock up and treat yourself to AF beverages (+chocolate +ice cream). 3) Begin a new healthy practice that you enjoy, so your focus isn’t on what you are giving up, but on doing more of something you enjoy.

 

Paul reminds us to practice new habits including listening to music when you get triggered. Listen to some of Paul’s favorites here:  https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/

 

If you find yourself overwhelmed with getting or staying sober, remind yourself that up until this moment, everything has worked out just fine. You don’t have to have it all figured out. Nobody does. Your job is to keep moving forward and making progress. But not aimlessly. When we remove alcohol, we also remove the veil of illusion. At first this is lonely and scary. This allows us to be more authentic. Give this life reboot some time. Trust me. Trust yourself.

 

Exact Nature exactnature.com  Code:  RE20

 

[11:52] Tom took his last drink on September 24, 2019.  He is 47, a surgical nurse and is married with two kids.  He loves fly fishing, snowboarding, running, live music, hiking cooking, playing guitar and yo yo’s.

 

Tom came from a long history of drinkers. Tom was a victim of sexual assault and bullying.  He didn’t drink regularly until late high school/early college.  He described never feeling comfortable in his own skin.  Drinking helped him overcome that discomfort.  Tom’s drinking ramped up in college.  He also smoked pot and was never a normal drinker. 

 

At age 30, Tom made a career change and went to nursing school with the goal of being a family man.  He became a surgical nurse and has been in the field ever since.  After moving to Bozeman, the effects of years of drinking started to take their toll.  He drank to black out, drank and drove and hid his drinking.  He quit once on his own for two months, then drank for another five years.  After a difficult conversation with his wife, he quit drinking the next day. 

 

Tom described living a double life because his behavior at work and at home were completely different. 

 

Tom leveraged AA to help him quit drinking for good.  He went to meetings daily, got a sponsor, embraced spirituality, worked the steps, and did what he was told. 

 

Tom can be himself now.  He loves his job; has become a leader and he is no longer depressed.  His marriage and his relationship with his children is better.  He is making new friends and repairing old relationships. 

 

Odette’s Summary

Odette discusses moving toward your values to give you a new framework to evaluate your life and your sobriety.

 

Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com  Code:  RE20

 

Upcoming events, retreats, and courses:

  • You can find more information about our events

 

Resources

Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee.

Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here!

Sobriety Tracker iTunes 

 

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    RE 354: Holiday Survival Kit

    1:04:45

    Episode 354   Today we have Cordell.  He is 38, from North Dakota, and took his last drink on December 6, 2017.   Highlights from Odette   Odette has some helpful hints to contribute to Paul’s Holiday Survival Guide.  Odette suggests 1) have a fun escape plan, 2) offer to do the dishes, 3) dig into your arsenal of why’s.   Beyond tips, Odette suggests really focusing on effective communications.  Set expectations in advance, particularly with those closest to you so they understand you are committed to staying sober, even if it means leaving early.  You don’t have to burn the ships either, you can reference plans early the next day.  Odette says having a puppy is a great reason to leave a party early.    Exact Nature exactnature.com Code:  RE20   [6:05] Cordell took his last drink December 6, 2017.  He is 38 and has a wife and 3 kids.  He spends lots of time chasing kids and he works in a coal mine.  Sobriety is the best choice he ever made.   Cordell was raised in a Christian family with lots of family gatherings in a small town with lots of alcohol.  Taking a sip of his parents’ drink was common.  In high school, alcohol was a given, part of the norm.  Cordell didn’t drink to have fun; he drank to get wasted.  He started working as a welder and drinking was part of the routine.   At 22 he decided he needed help.  He smoked pot and took other drugs, and it had a spiraling effect.  He went to a 30-day Intensive Outpatient program.  He was sober for almost a year and decided he had it under control.  He would drink 1-2 beers at a party and “drink responsibly”.    At 24, his girlfriend was pregnant.  He wasn’t ready to be a father and his drinking really took off.   He lost his job, his friends, his car and was at rock bottom.  He met his son for the first time when he was 3 months old.  Meeting his son encouraged him to clean up his act a bit.  He quit taking drugs but continued to drink.  He moved in with his girlfriend, got a job and maintained as a functioning alcoholic.  His daughter was born two years later.  Almost immediately after his daughter was born, his girlfriend was pregnant again.      Cordell was often put in jail for fighting with his girlfriend.  He eventually got a job at the coal mine.  He and his girlfriend got married.  His drinking slowed, but extra income became an opportunity to start taking drugs again.  He was fired after a random drug screen.  His drinking and using escalated and his wife kicked him out.  He moved in with a buddy who was also drinking and drugging.    Ultimately, he went to rehab.  The withdrawal was hell, but he found new tools to have fun, and started to surround himself with healthy people.  Now he coaches wrestling, volleyball and is actively engaged with his kids.  He talks to his sponsor daily and he has learned how to apologize.    Kris’s Summary Kris reminds us our path isn’t linear.  He speaks about binging on feelings and emotions.  He is physically and emotionally exhausted.  Kris encourages us to shift our thinking an reframe recovery as a gift.  We learn how to feel and sit with our feelings, know they aren’t permanent and move forward.  Stick with it!   Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com  Code:  RE20   Holiday 2021 AF Survival Guide   Stock up on your favorite AF beverages or another type of treat. Begin a new healthy practice that you enjoy. Develop a detailed craving game plan. FOMO to JOMO - Pick an upcoming event and sit it out. Select a Holiday Theme Song. Pick your Thanksgiving beverage of choice and enjoy One minute of intense MINDFULNESS Sticky Note - Write a reminder, affirmation, or goal on a sticky note and place it somewhere where you’ll see it each day Have a fun escape plan Offer to do the dishes Study your why’s   Upcoming events, retreats, and courses: You can find more information about our events   Resources Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee. Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here! Sobriety Tracker iTunes   
  • Recovery Elevator podkast

    RE 353: It's a Week to be Thankful

    57:33

    Episode 353 – It’s a Week to be Thankful   Today we have Jan.  She is from Connecticut and took her last drink on February 1, 2021.   Restore – intensive on-online dry January 15 session course. Registration opens 12/1/21. Costa Rica starts January 15. Email [email protected] to get on waiting list. AF Sober Ukulele (8 week) course starts 2/5/2022. Registration opens January 7th. Denver Retreat (3/31 – 4/2) Register: https://www.recoveryelevator.com/denver/   Café RE donated $15,094.73 to organizations and non-profits geared towards helping those affected by addiction.   Highlights from Paul   Paul is encouraging listeners to develop a game plan for the holidays.  Last week he encouraged us to: 1) create a detailed craving plan, 2) turn FOMO into JOMO by saying no and, 3) pick a holiday theme song.   Paul shares that when we make the decision to not drink, an unbelievable amount of energy is released. This is less about staying away from alcohol and more about creating a life that doesn’t require alcohol. When we’re drinking there is no space mentally for this new life.   This week Paul encourages us to:  1) select a Thanksgiving AF beverage, 2) schedule one minute of intense mindfulness and, 3) sticky note – write a reminder, goal or affirmation and put it somewhere you can see it.      Remember what the holiday is all about, being grateful for all the gifts we have including the adversity that inspired us to go alcohol free.  Paul’s pep talks can be found here:  https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/   Exact Nature exactnature.com Code:  RE20   [14:34] Jan took her last drink 2/1/2021.  She is 71 years old and has a son.  She is a massage therapist, health coach, dog sitter and loves hiking, audiobooks, and photography.   Jan started drinking went she went to school overseas in Italy.  It was part of the culture. She drank and experimented with drugs through college.  She had serious health consequences because of her drinking.  She worked at several resorts and met her husband who loved to drink.    Jan went to AA and stayed sober for four years.  She returned to drinking for twenty years.   She struggled with mental health issues, anxiety, and panic attacks.   She spent a lot of time in psychiatric hospitals and was encouraged not to drink.  Jan went to 4 or 5 different treatment centers.  The tipping point came when her son pushed her to quit.  Jan pretended to take Antabuse in front of her son and maintaining the facade was exhausting.  A friend of her son’s recommended Café RE; the connection she found within Café RE was very helpful.    Jan loves “We are the Luckiest” by Laura McKowen and recalls hearing, “find a room that works and stick with it,” and that resonated for her.  She steers clear of situations where people are drinking alcohol.  The obsession has lifted.    Odette’s Summary Odette reflects on Café Re’s recent regionals event.  The theme was acceptance.  Odette reads a beautiful passage from Melody Beattie about acceptance.  https://melodybeattie.com/acceptance-2/      Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com  Code:  RE20   Holiday 2021 AF Strategy Guide   Stock up on your favorite AF beverages or another type of treat. Begin a new healthy practice that you enjoy. Develop a detailed craving game plan. FOMO to JOMO - Pick an upcoming event and sit it out. Select a Holiday Theme Song. Pick your Thanksgiving beverage of choice and enjoy One minute of intense MINDFULNESS Sticky Note - Write a reminder, affirmation, or goal on a sticky note and place it somewhere where you’ll see it each day   Upcoming events, retreats, and courses: You can find more information about our events   Resources Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee. Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here! Sobriety Tracker iTunes   

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